It's hard to be vulnerable
When you've been strong all your life.
It's hard to stop someone from cutting you
When you're the one holding the knife.
It's hard knowing true happiness
When you haven't been happy for a while,
It's hard being yourself
When all you wore was a fake smile.
It's hard being the doctor
When you're diagnosed with the same pain
But it's even hard being the patient
Knowing death is what you've already claimed.
Issuing advice
That you wished you would hear,
Comforting and offering hugs
To people who wouldn't even care.
Trying to help makes things even worse,
Stagnated in all your progress, maybe it's a curse.
All that effort to prove that they mattered,
But being so inconsiderate they seemed unbothered.
You try to explain each situation as they arise
But the more you do, the more the relationship dies.
All you crave is support and peace,
But even those seem out of reach.
Start seeing things for what they are,
And not what you want them to be.
Sometimes we're too available for others that's completely unavailable to us,
But we cling to the things that got us attached in the first place and in those we trust.
Despite the clear visuals,
The actions perceived.
We tell ourselves that's not who they are,
Another narrative, we believe.
It's hard to see what's in front of you,
Not because our eyes are closed.
But because we are blinded,
By the very things we are showed.

~ Tremar Ivey~