( FAYE )

my head rests against finns shoulder, releasing nothing but soft sniffles.

it's 4am and neither of us can obtain an ounce of sleep. especially not me, following the news he broke to me this evening.

"you know what this reminds me of?" he starts.

i glance up at him with curiosity through my bloodshot eyes. "when we first moved in here, the first two weeks"

my lips slowly form a smile as i recall what he's referring to. when we had first moved in, we pulled all nighters and slept during the day, with absolutely nothing to do. i didn't have my job yet and finn wasn't doing any acting gigs due to covid.

those nights that we stayed up doing karaoke, baking, binging tv shows, watching awful movies on purpose or just relaxing in the midst of comfortable silence were honestly the best nights of my life, the best time of my life.

"yeah... except this time it's much more depressing" i snicker.

i feel his fingers begin to run through my hair, brushing out tangles with care. "it's gonna be okay, faye. we'll get through all this together"

his calming voice was a much needed respite from the panic that consumed my mind. as his hand starts massaging my scalp, i feel my eyelids turn heavy and my consciousness slowly drifting away.

— ★ —

markass

why aren't you here

because
i'm too silly to work today

you jokester!
cant take you anywhere!
😆😆🤪🥰
but like fr
wya

home

why

depression 😉

On my way!
FUCK
stupid correction thing
omw.

no no no
it's fine
you stay at work
i'll be there tomorrow

you sure?

yes

kk
i'll tell shane you're sick

thank you

but like what's wrong
wait shit
did finn die?

what
no
what

oh fuck
did rory die?
wait.
oh my god.
did sadie die...

bro
no one died

are you dying?
you got breast cancer?

what

sorry
there was this lady talking
about breast cancer to me today
while i took her order
it's kinda burned into my brain rn

okay...

yeah
anyways
since sadies still alive
i'm asking her out after my shift today

oh

aww! you sound so enthusiastic 🥺
such a good friend!! 🤎

listen
i think sadies seeing someone

.
BRO
you tell me that NOW ??

i just found out
i'm sorry

sighhh
it's fine
you got any other cute friends?

no.

alr
hey maybe the breast cancer
lady is single 😳😳😳

okay marcus
i'm leaving now

damn
wonder what scared you away

ily marker

lyt

the smile on my face from speaking to marcus seems to disappear upon taking recognition to another text notification, this one coming from an individual with whom i had no wish to speak to.

pussy sandwich

ginger 🤮
guys
guysysgusgs

tea & biscuits 🇬🇧
whats good brochacho

mclaughing
millie wtf

tea & biscuits 🇬🇧
its 9 in the morning.

ginger 🤮
very important
faye isn't answering her phone

mclaughing
shes dead
now go back to sleep

ginger 🤮
actually i haven't slept
maybe she's mad at me

mclaughing
sadie shes DEAD
deceased
gone

tea & biscuits 🇬🇧
why would she be mad at you?

ginger 🤮
idk

tea & biscuits 🇬🇧
can you think of any reason?

ginger 🤮
no not rlly

every single part of me wants to type out a paragraph stating the reason, but i know that wouldn't be the most mature way to deal with this.

so instead, i do the next best thing and spam them with my love for finn wolfhard.

ginger 🤮
WHAT
HI???
FAYE???

mclaughing
oh she alive
dammit

ginger 🤮
wgat
faye
are you okay

tea & biscuits 🇬🇧
i think shes held hostage

ginger 🤮
WHAT ARE YIU DOING

tea & biscuits 🇬🇧
faye
ma'am
what is this behaivour

mclaughing
saving all of these fr

ginger 🤮
i am. lost.

i love phin

mclaughing
same

high five

mclaughing
ew
get those stinky ass
hands away from me tf

mclaughing
STOP

tea & biscuits 🇬🇧
CALEB WHY ARE YOU
DRINKING WINE.
YOU ARE A FETUS!! 😡

mclaughing
thATS APPLE JUICE

tea & biscuits 🇬🇧
omg
sameee!!!
#me #relate #hashtag

ginger 🤮
guys
faye has not said a
WORD to me 😭

mclaughing
lucky.
be grateful

mclaughing
what is wronf with you.

you dont want me to
pull out the millie ones.

tea & biscuits 🇬🇧
oH MY GOD
NO
PLEASE

2017-2018 snapchat

tea & biscuits 🇬🇧
stop it...

tea & biscuits
NO
OH MY GOD

mclaughing
LMFAOAO
WHAT DOES THAT
EVRN MEANNNNN

pink to make the boys wink 😉😉

finnster
i am winking rn

tea & biscuits 🇬🇧
THATD SO SCARY

mclaughing
gulp
i shat my pants.

Wow.

tea & biscuits 🇬🇧
Wow.

mclaughing
Wow.

tea & biscuits 🇬🇧
okay NO
YOUR DONE.
YOUR DONE.

finnster
im actually crying

tea & biscuits 🇬🇧
STOP IT

ginger 🤮
faye
check dms

finnster
she's busy

ginger 🤮
SHES RUGHT HERE

finnster
yeah exactly
she's busy doing this
this is so important
you don't understand

ginger 🤮
not more important
than replying to my texts 😡

ginger 🤮

okay seriously
is everything okay?

does this scare u

faye
i'm serious

i am too
it's a scary picture

okay you're doing that thing

what thing

using humour to escape reality

no way really?!

faye
can you just tell me what's going on
seen

— ★ —

maybe it was the sudden adrenaline rush from talking to my friends that prompted me to click onto rorys contact, tapping my feet on the floor as a few rings are audible.

"hi baby" rorys enthusiasm peeks through my phone. how could she be so happy.

"can i come over? we need to talk"

rory remains silent for a moment before clearing her throat. "yeah, ofcourse! why so early tho? aren't you at work right now"

"no, i didn't go" is all i say before hanging up.

— ★ —

my heart feels as if it's about to jump out of my chest as i knock on the wooden door. i hadn't thought this through at all, it just feels right to get it over with as soon as possible. i'm not even sure of what to say to her.

i depart from the train of rumination as a smiling blonde opens the door. "come in"

my pulse rises with every stride. instead of dragging out the moment with small talk, i figure that it would be a better decision to immediately rip off the adhesive bandage with a quick yet painful pull.

i glance towards the ground below, refraining from meeting her large eyes. i could not bear to look at her while doing this.

"i know you're cheating on me, rory"

rorys features fall to an expression which indicates i'm correct, this really did happen. the tiniest bit of doubt that my heart bore was immediately washed away.

i await a response, receiving nothing. instead, she simply collapses onto her couch, placing her head within her hands.

my gaze stays fixated on the floor, beholding her from the corner of my eyes. "faye i..."

"you don't need to say anything. just..." a sharp inhale exits my lips. "i don't think i can be with someone who's this complicated"

rorys eyes widen before she rushes out of the couch "wait- what? no. no faye stop, you're talking crazy now"

i raise my brows with an amused scoff. "you cheated on me rory. i'm pretty sure it's not the first time, either"

"i know but it was a mistake i swear. it was a big mistake, a huge mistake" her voice begins to shake. "just please, faye you're all i have"

tears begin to dwell within my eyes. "how could you even do that? just throw away everything for a girl you met not even a month ago?" 

"im sorry... im so so so sorry. i wish i could go back and change it, im so sorry faye. i don't know what i was thinking. honey please" she takes my hand in hers. "believe me when i say that i love you more than anything, you're the first and last form of love for me. please faye"

my eyes shut themselves close before i release her hand, rushing out the front door.

i block out the sounds of her voice calling out for me. i drain everything out, running to my car. i reach for the engine through my cloudy vision before taking off.

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