JAEMIN LET OUT a shaky breath, staring at his messages.

It wasn't about Jisung, for once. This time the brunette was debating whether or not he should text Genevieve. Ever since she went on a date with his best friend, he felt awkward around her and didn't know what to say anymore. He was unintentionally giving her the silent treatment; turning his head away during class, and ignoring her during practice.

It'd been a week since he had a genuine conversation with her. The girl had tried getting his attention, and left multiple messages.

Today was the day Jisung would be taking Jaemin on an 'official' date. He was kind of freaking out to say the least, and needed his friend for emotional support and fashion advice— would that be considered using her? In his defense, he's a little bit petty towards her, and Jeno. How can they fail to mention their blooming relationship to him?!

But in all honestly, he doesn't just need her help to get ready for this date, he also misses her. A lot.

Furrowing his brows, Jaemin decides, "Fuck it." He can't hold a grudge forever. He begins typing and sends the message.

He taps his phone impatiently, waiting for his friend to reply.

"Are you okay, Nana?" His little sister asks, glancing up from her show on the T.V.

Jaemin gives her a reassuring smile, "Of course I am, Jia," He pats his lap and the girl crawls up and cuddles into his chest, while keeping her eyes on the television. He wraps his arms around her tiny body and asks, "What're you watching?"

"Dragon Tales!" She exclaims excitedly.

Kids still watch that? Jaemin remembers when he used to watch that show as a kid. He chuckles and begins to start stroking Jia's hair. She hasn't had a nap all day, so he needs to get her to sleep soon or she will start throwing a tantrum—she doesn't know this, but when she's sleepy she becomes very stubborn, and refuses to do anything. Jaemin thinks it's easier to just get her tired before that happens.

As Jia's breath starts slowing, signifying that she's dozing off, the brunette hears his phone go off on the couch.

Picking it up, it's Genevieve's text confirming that she'll be there quickly. He doesn't bother to respond and instead gets up from the couch with Jia in his arms and walks into her shared room with Joonie, who's at a friends house, and lays her in her bed. Pulling the covers over her and slipping her favorite stuffed animal into her arms, he leaves the room and closes the door softly.

Soon, Genevieve arrives and he leads her into his room. She sits on his bed, cozy as ever and smiles at him.

"So," She claps her hands. "What's going on?"

Ignore the elephant in the room, I see.

"I'm going on this date with this kid, right—"

"Jisung?" Genevieve interrupts.

The brunette's eyes feel like they could pop out of their sockets, and he clenches his teeth. "How do you know about him?" He asks, extremely confused seeing as he's never told his friend anything about this.

Genevieve hums, blind to the tension in the room. "Jeno told me about it. Said he was weird." She shrugs. "Anyway, what about it?"

Jaemin seethes, but holds himself back from saying anything. Blinking slowly and breathing through his nose, he opens his closet, "I need help looking like a bomb-ass bitch," He then adds, "Please."

The girl giggles and nods her head. She makes her way through his closet and digs through, throwing out anything she hates on one side and things she thinks may work on. Some clothes she gives a disgusted expression to, and others she nods her head in approval. She gasps, and turns towards Jaemin holding up a white long sleeved shirt with blue jeans.

The brunette raises a brow in suspicion. "Seems pretty basic."

Genevieve rolls her eyes. "Yes, but it can suit a casual or fancy date! Now go try it on," She puts the clothes in his arms and turns around, closing her eyes with her hands. After being told she can turn around, she squeals at her masterpiece.

"It looks perfect!" She claps.

Jaemin shrugs, feeling okay with it. "Thanks."

Genevieve nods, then sighs. She sits back on his bed and taps her foot nervously. "So . . . why have you been ignoring me?" She's been waiting to ask this question for days.

The brunette looks at her, shocked at her question. He was unprepared, and assumed she'd just ignore what he had done. He stares at his carpet, not wanting to look at his friend. "I don't know if I should tell you this." He mumbles. Genevieve hums, encouraging him to continue. "I was a little upset about you and Jeno."

Her eyes widen, and immediate regret washes over her face. "Nana, I swear we didn't mean to leave you out. It all just so happened so fast." She tries to reassure.

"What did?"

"Our relationship, of course. I mean, it was so weird!" She giggles. "I'd had a crush on Jeno for ages, ever since I saw him drop you off at practice! He'd never shown interest in me, in fact I almost thought he was pinning after you the entire time!" Jaemin nearly gagged, but then gulped as he remembered what happened the other day. "But I guess he's just shy, and this year has just been magical." She smiles sweetly at the memories she has with the raven haired boy.

"I'm glad," Jaemin says, then adds as an afterthought. "So are you two like, a thing?" He asks.

"Yeah, I think so." She answers. "Is that okay with you?"

Shocked by that question, Jaemin stuttered, "U-Uh, yeah . . . I guess,"

Genevieve tilted her head. "You sure?"

"Well, here's the thing Genevieve," Jaemin took a deep breath to try to collect himself, but the girl staring at him (was she even blinking?) didn't help put him at ease much. "Jeno tried to kiss me!" He blurted, then covered his mouth with his hands, immediately regretting what he said.

Suddenly, water wells up in the girl's eyes and she sniffles. "W-what?"

Oh fuck. Jaemin internally groans in his head.

Forcing out a laugh, he slaps her shoulder gently. "Got ya!" He exclaims, and continues laughing almost manically. The stress is starting to get to him. "I was just joking! As Jeno's best friend, I have to make sure you actually care about him!"

That was a total lie.

Genevieve swipes under her eyes, her lip jutted out. "Really?" She asks.

She sounds so vulnerable, and Jaemin feels horrible for telling her lies. He wanted to tell her the truth, hoping they could maybe get some kind of clarification out of what happened, but he just couldn't do that to her. It's obvious that she's already in love with his best friend . . . Jaemin feels like he can't breathe. So much is going on through his head:

Jeno tried to kiss me, but Genevieve and Jeno are an item, and Genevieve seems to really like him, so I must be delusional right? Plus, I'm going on a date with Jisung! How can I keep thinking about Jeno when I have other things to focus on? God, I'm a horrible person. Horrible, horrible, horrible. And conceited too. Jeno would never do anything like that!

Suddenly Jaemin's breath fastens, but he feels like he can't breath. It feels like someone is just pushing on his chest, restraining him. He stands up and yells, "I got to shit!" and runs to the bathroom, ignoring Genevieve's laughter.

Jaemin didn't have to shit, but it was the fastest excuse he could come up with to get out of there.

Genevieve ended up leaving after an hour, and now the brunette was left sitting in his room, staring at his reflection. For once, he wasn't really thinking of anything. He was actually zoning out, waiting for Jisung to come pick him up. He stared intently at his long eyelashes, and pink lips.

It wasn't long until he heard a honk coming from outside of his house and ran out into the living room, quickly kissing his mother goodbye and reaching outside where Jisung's BMW sat idle, headlights on.

"Hi," He said once getting into the car.

Jisung put the car in reverse and backed out of the driveway, before beginning to drive out of the neighborhood. "Hey," He responded.

Jaemin notices that the blonde is anxiously gnawing at his bottom lip, but chooses to ignore it. Instead, and smiles and bats his eyelashes. The other is dressed in black, long sleeved shirt and casual blue jeans, but just looking at him made butterflies swarm Jaemin's stomach.

It's a comfortable silence as they drive, with Jisung tapping his fingers against the steering wheel. After what the brunette suspects to be thirty minutes, he begins to see green, neon lights and the shadows on rollercoasters and buildings gleaming in front of the sunset - pinks and dark purple hues hover in the sky. He smiles excitedly while looking out the window, waiting for them to park.

The last time Jaemin has been to the beach was when he was a kid. His parents no longer have time to take them anywhere due to their work schedules.

After parking, they exit the car and Jisung grabs a few bags from the trunk before leading the way to the wooden pier. The grand ferris wheel is the center of attention, with many people already in line and waiting for their turn. The smell of churros waft through his nose, and the sound of musicians and screaming children fill his ears. It all seems so nostalgic, and Jaemin feels happy.

As they walk he wraps his hand around Jisung's bicep, which surprisingly feels strong. The blonde glances at the other in surprise, but says nothing about it.

"So, where should we go first?" Jaemin asks.

"Wherever you want," Jisung shrugs, and Jaemin noticed that he's still gnawing on his lip.

The brunette furrows his brows and stops, ultimately making the other halt as well. He looks into his brown eyes. "Are you okay, Sungie?" He inquiries, concern evident in his tone.

Faking a smile, Jisung nods. "I'm just hungry. Let's get some food?"

Jaemin nods and the two walk down the pier, looking for something appeasing to eat. That's when Jaemin glances around, and notices all the large rollercoasters that take up most space. He feels the sudden urge to conquer them all, and tugs on Jisung's arm and rushes to get in line.

"What're we doing?" The blonde asks worriedly.

"I haven't been on a rollercoaster in ages!" Jaemin yelled, his voice being hard to hear over the wind howling, the waves crashing against shore and people screaming.

As the line got shorter and shorter, Jisung's anxiousness only grew more and more. Normally, he wasn't scared of heights or rollercoasters. Perhaps it was because he was surrounded by so many people, too many crowds but he couldn't get his hands to stop shaking. It felt hard to breathe, like someone was pushing against his chest. He didn't want to ruin their date though, and convinced himself he was fine.

They were next in line, and the employee gestured for them to take a seat in the rollercoaster. A person spoke over the intercom, telling all the riders about safety precautions and what-not. A countdown began:

1 . . . 2 . . . 3!

Jaemin squealed in excitement, and intertwines his fingers with the blonde's and holds both of their hands in the air, exhilarated by the speed of the coaster and the wind flying through his hair. The ride was fast, only lasting about forty seconds and as they came to a stop, Jaemin's hair was all over the place. He giggled, but frowned when he saw the other's state.

Jisung's eyes were still closed, and his hands and lips were trembling. He was breathing fast, almost as if he thought the ride was still going.

The brunette shook him gently, and met his wide eyes with disquiet.

"A-are we done?" He asked, his voice shaky.

Jaemin nodded his head and helped the other out of the coaster, and took it upon himself to carry the bags. They make their way down the stairs and to the middle of the pier, with Jaemin's arm wrapped around the blonde's waist. His legs were weak, and he couldn't seem to keep himself straight. They walked to a table near a vendor.

The brunette sits down and drops their bags and grabs his cold, quivering, hands. "What's wrong?" He asks, them continues, "And don't say nothing, because I know that's not true." He says sternly.

Jisung sighs and shakes his head. "I'm sorry." He mumbles.

"For what?" Jaemin tilts his head.

"For ruining this." When he looks up, the brunette's heart almost breaks. He looks so sad, so disappointed himself. "I wanted to take you somewhere fun, to make you happy . . . but the truth is I have a hard time being surrounded by crowds for a long time. Sometimes I can handle it, sometimes I can't. It makes me anxious, that's why I dropped out of school."

Jaemin coos. "You didn't ruin anything, Sungie. You could've just told me about this," He says, making sure his tone remains soft. "How about I get us some food and we can leave, yeah?" He asks with a smile.

He truly doesn't mind leaving early. Just the fact that Jisung was willing to stay uncomfortable just to make him happy and to have a good first date met something. It was the first time he's done something to prove that he actually . . . likes Jaemin. It made him special.

After ordering two hamburgers and fries, they take it to Jisung's car and eat it together, listening to music and admiring the beautiful lights emitted from all the buildings on the pier. Even if they weren't there, Jaemin thought that this was better than being amidst all the chaos and crowds. All he needs is Jisung to be here, right next to him to feel content.

Dear Diary,

Today I went on a date with Jisung.

It wasn't perfect. He isn't perfect. I'm not perfect.

But I think we're perfect together . . .