With my increasingly turbulent behavior, Asgore, Toriel, and Dagiel more firmly insisted that I get an assistant to help me in the lab. I don't think they thought I needed help with work, I think they wanted someone to keep an eye on me while they couldn't be there. Someone to make sure I didn't hurt anyone- including myself- when things got out of hand.

I resisted strongly, of course. I was, and still am, of the opinion that almost everyone is an idiot. The only difference is that then there were even fewer exceptions than there are now.

But when the king and Queen actually gave me an order to get an assistant, I could resist no longer.

The trick, though, was finding a bearable assistant. Someone who was at least competent enough to keep up with me, if not help around the lab. The problem was that none of the lab employees fit this description. Nor did any of the interns.

Eventually I came up with a Cunning Plan to find someone at least mildly intelligent. And, better yet, it included getting vengeance on the university that kicked me out.

I had decided that any assistant I might get had to be gotten from outside the current lab staff. Really, the only reason I hadn't completely overhauled the entirety of the lab staff was because they were all scientists whom Firhaur had seen fit to hire, and I was merely trying to cling to every scrap of my lost brother I could.

But! On to my Cunning Plan.

For some time since my weapons had gone up in demand, a number of monster colleges and universities had been inviting- or, rather, practically begging- me to come give lectures at their 'most prestigious' wherever the crap it was. I had, of course, completely ignored all of them.

Now, though, as according to my Cunning Plan, I scheduled myself to give two lectures, each at a different university. From these students I would find one whose mental capabilities hadn't already been demolished by the schools, and taking them on as an intern-slash-assistant.

But, now, see, I had no intentions of picking one of the students from the first school. That was the university that had kicked me out. I planned on publicly humiliating its teaching ability.

Like I said. They got what was coming to them.

The day for the first lecture came, and I was just a few minutes late. Fashionably late. It meant that when I came and slammed open the doors to the auditorium, everyone was there to see it. And when I strode into the room, red scarf billowing over my shoulder, my seven-foot-tall frame towering over the already-seated students, the sudden hush crashed over the chatter that had filled the hall. I could feel every eye on me as I advanced towards the stage, but I did not acknowledge a single monster. As the students fidgeted, unnerved by the cold dramatics of my entrance, my hands were unnaturally still, folded behind me.

I mounted the stage, stepped up to the podium. For a moment, I was silent. Now, now I looked out at the crowd assembled before me. I stared at them, holding captive the gaze of everyone in the room.

And then, finally, I spoke.

"I'm sure," I said in a hard voice, "I do not need to introduce myself to any of you, however, for the sake of professionalism, I shall do so. I am Dr. Gaster." A moment's hesitancy, as my Lv defense slipped a tiny bit at the thoughts of my next words. "The Royal Scientist." But no. I couldn't afford to lose it in front of these people. I had a reputation to uphold, a reputation of an icy cold demeanor, just containing a burning temper.

Of course, there was that one idiot kid, somewhere in the back. "Yeah, well, where's your lab coat, doctor?"

Honestly, I have no idea why teenage kids do things like this. It's purely idiotic, and is only going to end in their embarrassment.

As it was now. I looked in the direction of the shout, and found the idiot and his groupies by their smug grins. For a long moment, I just stared at the kid. And slowly, ever so slowly, I let a grin cross my own face.

My grin was decidedly more malicious.

It was just a fragment of the one I had worn that day on the battlefield, just a spark of Firhaur's fire that burnt in my Soul.

The idiot and his groupies stopped smiling.

"That," I said, playing on my Cunning Plan, "is an excellent question. Currently, I do not actually have a lab coat, because some idiot intern spilled some acidic chemical on it while I wasn't wearing it, and utterly destroyed it. Which then brings me to the purpose of my visit here today." I paused a moment, glancing at the professors assembled off to the side. They looked confused; I had not told them of my ulterior motives. But ulterior motives I had, motives that I acted on. "As of the chemical spill yesterday, I am looking for an assistant. You, one of you lucky monsters, will get the honor of working with me... if I deem you capable enough to do so, which is why I am here. So, let us begin."

And I started. Honestly, I don't remember much of the lecture, except that much of it was on quite complicated rune theory, no one was able to answer my questions, and the few monsters that tried were left horribly baffled- and embarrassed.

About halfway through my scheduled time, I stopped, turning to the professors, who were just as baffled as the students.

"Is this," I gestured to the assembled students, "all of your students? Surely, these are those whose grades are suffering. I can only fathom that you thought they were truly in need of my help, and brought them for my lecture, because they are nowhere near the intelligence level I am looking for. Surely, surely you have taught some students better than this! Please, tell me where I might find them!"

Awkwardly, the professors admitted that these were all their students.

I scoffed. "Then I am beginning to think it is good that you kicked me out before I finished my first semester! For I certainly wouldn't have been able to become the Royal Scientist with the skills you're teaching! But my time is wasted here; I am not looking for incompetents! I suppose I shall be taking my leave now!"

And with that, I left, not looking back once. And, once the auditorium doors closed behind me, I could hear the tense, fragile silence in the room explode into bewildered chaos.

The next day, the newspapers proclaimed the stunning success of my Cunning Plan.

And such was only increased when, amid a ridiculous amount of praise, I chose a young student of the second school to be my assistant.

To be honest, despite my somewhat false praise, Fennin was a rather bright monster. What he lacked in factual knowledge he made up for in logical thinking skills. The small, orange, raptor-like saurian would be the closest thing I had to a work partner until the end of his days... which came all too unfortunately soon.

§

A/N

I think I've done the impossible...

I've eaten far too many Oreos...

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