one perfect/prefect

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          USUALLY, NADIA WAS NOT A VERY ANXIOUS PERSON. In fact, she liked to think she had a healthy amount of confidence, though Lucille would probably argue that she had more than the average amount. She held herself high, pony tail swaying in the wind, and didn't let people knock her down easily. When she knew she belonged, she made sure to show it even if others disagreed.

Though, there were some things that made her incredibly anxious. Exams, for one, because while she was a great student (in her not-so humble opinion) and made the best marks on her essays, her test taking schools were not ones people would kill over. She was alright, and mixed with more than enough preparation she did very fine work, but the idea of an exam that placed her entire learnings into one example made her incredibly nervous.

She did well, she always did, but quantifying that into one exam that her future employers would one day look and decide whether or not she was a hard worker made her melt into a bundle of nerves. She worked hard, tried her best, but sometimes didn't get the results she wanted.

But she also increasingly got anxious when one of her friends ignored her or was mad at her. Maybe that came from the lovely abandonment issues she got from her dear mother who left after giving birth to her, leaving her wonderful father to care for her, but the prospect of someone leaving her or turning their back from her made her want to vomit.

Logically, she knew that Lucille, Regulus, and Loren weren't going to abandon her over an argument or other problems going on in their lives or her own, but whenever they pulled away for a day or two or snapped at her, she thought the worst and ultimately made herself sick. Other people, strangers really, she didn't mind hating her.

She knew she offended people, knew she rubbed them the wrong way, and sometimes she was proud of that fact because she loved being able to say ha! you think I'm scum but I'm better at magic than you are! to anyone who needed it, but her friends...? No, absolutely not. The thought made her need to see Madame Pomphrey in the hospital wing.

Though, she supposed, today she was anxious for an entirely different reason. Her friends weren't ignoring her, nor did she think they were, and no exam was coming up since it was nearing the end of summer, she was anxious for an entirely different reason: whether or not she would Ravenclaw's female prefect.

It was already obvious that Lorenzo (Loren to everyone since he believed that Lorenzo was much too pretentious of a name) Donavan was obviously the male prefect for Ravenclaw. He was a goody two-shoes in every way, and a great example for younger kids. Happy, bright, and humble. Nadia, however, was not that.

She liked to think in some aspects that she was a great role model. Determined, studious, and proved herself in every way that she could, but she wasn't always the nicest person. She didn't walk around with a smile on her face but more of a scowl, and people were often intimidated when they met her eyes because they're reminiscent of a brewing storm. She was bright, sometimes with the right people, and not very humble. If she was good at something, she wasn't going to downplay it or brush off a compliment but instead take it and hold it hostage.

But maybe whoever decided prefects wanted someone exactly like Loren. He was perfect for the role, and everyone knew he was going to get it, but maybe the counsel or whoever wanted two Lorens from every house and not a Nadia. She would be perfect if given the opportunity, but she wasn't exactly the best role model for the younger students and they might be intimidated by her, though she didn't think herself scary at all.

Well, maybe sometimes. She wasn't afraid to hurt someone if they were being a prick, so maybe that could be scary and yet another reason she just wasn't cut out for being a prefect.

She heard her dad's car pull into the driveway so she placed her bookmark down after finishing the page. She was probably going to have to reread everything she started today because she just couldn't focus – hadn't really been able to all week knowing that prefect letters were going to be sent sometime soon.

"Hi, dad," she greeted him when she heard the front door open. She turned, and there was Howard Greene, with streaks of grey in his combed brown hair and wrinkles near his eyes as he smiled at her.

"Busy day?" he asked, eyeing the book in her hands, bending down near the back of the couch to give her a kiss on the head.

She sighed. "Not really. I haven't been able to focus enough to even enjoy what's happening," she admitted, pouting a little because she was just ready to know whether or not her spirit was going to be crushed for the upcoming school year.

She always looked forward to returning to Hogwarts. Rooming with Lucille, learning all that she could, absolutely flunking in art because she didn't have one artistic bone in her body even though she absolutely adored the act of painting, going to Hogsmeade on select Saturdays and getting sugar quills. There were so many things she looked forward to, and this year specifically she looked forward to hopefully being a prefect.

Not to say that she deserved it, but she knew that she had definitely put in a lot of effort to show that she could be a damn good one. No one could say that she didn't try to be one, at least, even though Lucille and Regulus laughed at her plenty of times for her effort. But whatever, she could take a few laughs if it meant she got what she wanted – she just didn't know right now if she had.

"Stop worrying about it. You can't make the letter get here any faster by thinking about it," he chuckled at her and she shot him a glare. He just shook his head when he met her eyes, one of the only few who weren't affected by the stormy gaze, probably because he raised her and remembered changing all her dirty diapers. That definitely took the intimidation factor out of them, or anything she could ever throw at him.

"Just for that, I'll make it happen," she told him stubbornly, "I will manifest the letter by pure will."

"I'm sure," he told her with an amused expression, chuckling again to himself as he moved to the kitchen.

Placing down her book on the coffee table, she followed him into the other room knowing that it was time to help make dinner. They always did together, part of their evening ritual when she was home for summer and the holidays. Simple and domestic, but something she always held dearly.

When she was younger, it was much harder leaving her dad to go to school. It was just them, Howard never remarrying or even dating, at least not to Nadia's knowledge. When she left, he was alone in this house until Christmas break and that broke her heart a little. It hurt her as well because she was leaving the person she had braved the world with her whole life, never having experienced so much time without him.

Now, though, at sixteen, she learned to soak up as much time with him as she could while she was home, and know that he was fine on his own. Howard had always preferred time alone, so she knew that he was terribly lonely while she was gone, which made it easier for her.

"Spaghetti good?" he asked, not even having to look to know that she had followed him.

She nodded. "I'll start boiling the water," she told him when he moved to get all the other ingredients out. When she was done, she hopped up onto the counter, pointedly ignoring the glare that her father sent her way while also giving him a small of full innocence in hopes he wouldn't verbally tell her to move.

"How was work?" she asked him, being the nice daughter she was.

He shrugged. "Fine. Same as always, really, but I can't exactly complain," he told her, and she nodded with that information. He was a librarian, prompting her to visit him sometimes at work whenever she needed another book, but he never told her much about his days. Annoying customers, interesting stories...nothing.

So, she filled her imagination with the ideas of small children asking her dad for help and him reading to them, and parents getting red as they checked out books because they were angry they had an overdue fine. Sometimes she saw that when she visited, but it was never enough, so she made up more stories just to get through the days.

Lucille's parents never let her visit Nadia during summer, mostly because they didn't understand the muggle world themselves so they forbade her from learning about it because it would display their ignorance, and Regulus' family...well, Nadia knew they absolutely abhorred her kind which was exactly why they – excluding his sister, Remelda – had no idea he befriended a muggleborn like her.

Well, probably a muggleborn really.

"And you? How was your day?" her dad asked and she shrugged as well, mirroring his movement almost exactly.

"Boring. I don't have anything to do," she complained, a small pout on her features.

"The pool's open just a few blocks from here," he suggested.

"I don't have anyone to go with."

He sighed at her, giving her face which practically screamed really? "You don't need anyone to go with. You're sixteen, Nadia, I'm sure you can manage walking there by yourself."

Her cheeks went red. She was a confident person, she knew that, but that didn't mean she liked going places by herself especially when she would have a better time with a friend. "That's not why I don't want to go alone. I just know that I'll be lonely and it won't be fun tanning or swimming. You need a friend for that, dad."

"If you say so..." he shook his head, not believing her but not arguing her point any further. She didn't try to start anything up again either, if to just let him relax after working all day.

Her feet swung back and forth as her dad moved to turn on the radio now that the conversation had lulled, so she hummed along when music filled the air. When the water began to boil, she poured the pasta noodles into the pot, stirring it all together until she heard something hit the window.

Frowning, she twisted her body to hear an owl hooting so she stopped what she was doing and moved to open up the window. The owl moved into and dropped a letter onto the counter before staring at her so she moved to get him a treat, having been prepared for this to happen with a giddy smile on her face.

When the owl flew away and she closed the window, she picked up the letter which she knew would hold her fate. For some reason, even though she dreamed of tearing it open for days now, she could stare at it, anxious once again for what it might say.

"Well, go on then," her father urged her. She looked at him for a moment, seeing him nod again at her, before turning over the letter and tearing it open. Opening the letter, her eyes raced through the words hoping to find exactly what she was looking for.

"Yes!" she cheered, a bright smile on her face as she turned to her dad again. "I'm a prefect!"

Swooping her up in his arms, her father gave her a huge hug which crushed her bones just a little, but she laughed and held him back just as tightly. Maybe she wasn't Loren Donavan perfect, but she was a role model in her own way...maybe, anyway.