CHAPTER 43

I felt so light when I woke up. It was as if all the heaviness in my chest disappeared the moment I knew the truth and was with Rafael. I reached out, trying to feel where I was lying down, searching for him. But why did it feel like the surface was moving? It felt shaky yet smooth as it moved swiftly.

I quickly opened my eyes and realized that even Helios was no longer there. That's when it hit me—I was in a moving car. When I looked at the driver, it was Oceanus.

"Oceanus," I called out to him softly.

Tears welled up in my eyes, and I frantically sat up, ignoring the pain from the wound on my back. I peeked out the wide window of the backseat. I couldn't stop myself from sobbing when I saw we were no longer in Helios's mansion; we were on the road, leaving their territory.

"Turn back," I cried.

Oceanus kept his eyes on the road, driving seriously. He seemed to be doing much better, except for the bruises that hadn't completely healed and the large scar on his face from being whipped.

"I need him," I said, tears streaming down my face. "Please, Oceanus. Let's go back there. I need him. I need Rafael... I need Helios," I sobbed desperately.

"I'm sorry, Hexia. We can't go back there yet. I already sent a signal to Atlas that we managed to escape, even though Helios was the one who let us leave their territory. I don't know what's going on between you and Helios, but going back would be even more dangerous."

I cried harder, my sobs filling the entire car as we drove back to Atlas's warehouse.

"P-please..." I begged.

Oceanus sighed deeply and met my tear-filled eyes briefly. He shook his head and sped up the car as if someone were chasing us.

"I'm really sorry, Hexia. It will only make it harder for Atlas to rescue us if we go back just so you can see him. The situation is still complicated and chaotic, and I believe only Atlas can fix it."

My chest tightened upon hearing his words. Weak and overwhelmed, I clutched at my chest as I felt it constrict and ache, slowly sinking back into the seat.

One night together wasn't enough if we were going to leave so soon. I knew it was difficult, but I felt like I was losing my mind, confused and torn. Five years apart, thinking something was true, only to find out it was a lie.

Now that I know the truth, I can't bear to be far from him again—but I have no choice. It's like there's a massive wall between us, and I can feel its weight pressing down on me. Tears continued to fall endlessly as I lay on my side in the backseat, hugging myself.

"We're almost at the warehouse, Hexia. Atlas will meet us at the underground parking lot," Oceanus said, but I didn't respond. I was too consumed by my tears.

"W-why?" I asked through sobs. "Why did you follow me there, Oceanus? Look at what happened to you. You got caught up in what they did to me in the torture chamber."

"It was part of our plan to rescue you, Hexia. Atlas found out from Pallas that it was Perses who ordered your abduction. There was a connection problem with the earpiece, and I couldn't hear Atlas' commands, which caused issues. We couldn't just storm in because we weren't prepared for Plan B," he explained as he continued to drive.

I wiped my tears quietly and closed my eyes as I felt them swelling. My eyelids felt heavy, and I just wanted to rest... At last, we were on our way back to Atlas' warehouse, a place I've come to see as a second home.

"I'm sorry you had to go through this, Oceanus," I murmured with my eyes shut.

"No, Hexia. We should be the ones apologizing for not rescuing you sooner," Oceanus replied, his voice full of genuine regret.

I didn't respond, keeping my eyes closed. The pain and tightness in my chest remained, refusing to ease. Helios' face surfaced in my mind, and tears started forming again, my lips trembling as I fought to keep them from spilling.

I don't know when Helios and I will meet again. It hasn't even been a day since we last saw each other, yet I already long to see him again.

-ˋˏ ༻❁༺ ˎˊ-

As soon as the car descended into the underground parking lot of Atlas' basement, we spotted Atlas standing at a distance, accompanied by Ria, who also seemed to be waiting for us.

I quickly sat up from where I was lying and fixed myself. I was wearing an oversized black T-shirt and matching black pajamas. There was no point in putting on the gown I had been wearing when Perses' men abducted me—it was filthy and torn at the back, with bloodstains that made it look even worse.

"We're here, Hexia—oh, you're awake," Oceanus said.

I just nodded at him as I combed through my long hair with my fingers. As we approached the end of the passage to park the car, I noticed the concern in Ria's expression as she stood beside Atlas. Atlas, on the other hand, had his arms crossed and his face void of any emotion.

The car came to a slow stop at the side, and as soon as the engine died, I stepped out and approached them.

"Hexia!" Ria exclaimed, rushing to me and engulfing me in a tight hug.

I heard Oceanus's footsteps behind me as he walked directly to Atlas, who gave him a curt nod.

I hugged Ria back tightly, and once again, tears threatened to spill from my eyes as memories of the torture chamber replayed in my mind like a broken record. I could almost still feel the whip slashing across my back repeatedly.

"Help me get rid of this scar on my back, R-Ria," I said, my voice trembling as I clung to her.

Her embrace tightened, and I heard her sniffle quietly. She was crying.

"Of course. We'll remove it if that's what you want," she said, her voice thick with emotion.

She was the one to gently pull away from our hug, and I saw the redness in Ria's eyes. She hooked her arm around mine, and we walked together toward Atlas, who was now speaking with Oceanus.

"I'm sorry," I immediately said when I got close to Atlas.

He let out a deep sigh before turning to look at me. His arms were still crossed as he took in my appearance. I hadn't seen my reflection since the abduction, so I had no idea if I looked presentable or if my face showed the toll of what I'd been through.

"We should be the ones apologizing, Hexia. I'm sorry we couldn't rescue you right away, but we moved as fast as we could once we learned you were taken. Unfortunately, another issue arose, which delayed things, and the earpiece connection also caused problems—"

"I already know that," I cut him off. "Oceanus told me about the issue with the earpiece. Instead of just rescuing me, he ended up suffering through the torture that was meant for me."

They knew, and I knew, that I wasn't okay—not yet. It was evident in the way I carried myself and in my tone when I spoke to them. I didn't have the strength or the will to pretend that what Perses' men did to me in that torture chamber didn't affect me deeply.

I was grateful Helios had killed them, but honestly, I wish he had left one alive for me to deal with. I wanted to show them the same pain they inflicted on me, to whip them repeatedly until they couldn't move, just as they had done to me.

"When both of you are in better shape, we'll discuss everything," Atlas said gently. Oceanus and I nodded in response. "For now, don't hesitate to go to the lab for help. There are doctors there who can treat both of you. Hexia, Ria will be the one to personally look after you."

"Alright, thank you," I replied quickly.

Atlas gave a small nod before signaling Oceanus to follow him. They entered the open elevator ahead of us. Ria and I followed closely behind, silently making our way upstairs.

-ˋˏ ༻❁༺ ˎˊ-

"D-did they do this to you?" Ria's voice trembled as she saw the full extent of the scars on my back.

I had already gone to my room to rest and didn't go straight to the first floor of Atlas' basement. I couldn't stay still, feeling the urge to rest while seeing the scars on my back. The scar was terrible—different cuts scattered across my back, as if a child had scribbled on it. There were long ones, short ones, and some that seemed deep.

Ria found me crying in front of the mirror because I couldn't believe how my back looked. I felt so ugly because of it. My confidence felt shattered because of the huge scar on my back.

"Yes..." I answered softly.

Now, both of us were sitting on my bed. I faced the headboard while Ria was behind me, carefully applying cream to my scars. We were sitting cross-legged, and it seemed like she was struggling to speak or ask about what had happened to me at Perses's mansion.

"Don't worry, Hexia. We'll get rid of this scar on your back," she reassured me.

"I don't know if this scar will ever go away, Ria. Some of them are so large and long, I don't think they'll ever heal," I responded, staring blankly at the headboard.

Once again, my tears fell as I remembered what happened in the torture chamber. I let them fall, feeling comfortable with Ria by my side. She listened to what I said, but I knew she was crying too, from her soft sniffles.

"We'll find a way to remove all of your scars, Hexia. We'll ask Atlas for help, maybe Pallas can help us get rid of them," she said, her voice shaking with emotion.

"I hope they also checked on Oceanus properly, Ria," I said to her.

I felt her lower the loose shirt I was wearing, and I turned to face her. I held her hand and looked at her face, which was now wet with tears.

"He was whipped across the face. I'm so worried, Hexia, because I'm sure it must have hurt so much—"

"Hexia, you're the one we're thinking about right now, if you only knew. Just seeing your scar on your back, I can tell some of your wounds are so deep. Atlas immediately asked for help from Pallas to track you and find out where they took you. He was right—they took you from Perses' territory. It just took longer because of a problem that came up. I'm sorry, Hexia. If only you had been rescued sooner, you wouldn't have to go through all of this."

I let out a soft laugh, brushing my arm, seeing her tears threatening to fall again. Her eyes were still red from crying.

"Even if Atlas had succeeded in rescuing me from Peses' territory, they would have hurt me anyway. There was nothing I could do but accept it. Did you make sure Oceanus' face wound was properly treated? I feel so guilty..."

"Shh... It's not your fault, and first of all, no one is to blame for all of this, Hexia. Always remember that," she interrupted, her voice firm.

I nodded, my lip trembling as I looked at her. I sighed softly, trying to calm myself. The room fell silent for a while, neither of us speaking.

My eyes widened when I suddenly remembered. I needed to ask for that because I knew that Helios didn't use a condom when we had sex in his room.

"Ria, there's something I want to ask you," I suddenly said.

"What is it?" she quickly replied, getting closer to me. "Does something hurt? Do you want to take a painkiller to lessen the pain you're feeling in your back?"

I quickly shook my head. "No. I just want to ask something because I'm not sure if you have this in the lab, since all you do there is drugs."

"Okay. What is it?" she asked.

"I need pills."

She furrowed her brow at what I said. "Pills? What kind of pills?"

I swallowed and felt embarrassed to mention it to her. "It's contraceptive pills. I need them now, Ria. Do you have any on the first floor? If not, I need to buy some immediately because maybe—"

I panicked when I saw her start crying in front of me. She grabbed my hand tightly while looking at me.

"Did they touch you?" she weakly and tearfully asked. "Did they r-rape you there?"

My eyes widened, and I quickly shook my head. I gently stroked her arm to calm her down.

"No! They didn't touch me, Ria. I'm fine, they just hurt me, but it didn't go that far, they didn't assault me. Please, calm down. I just need the pills because I had unprotected sex," I explained.

She froze at what I said, like a weight was lifted off her chest. She quickly wiped her tears and hugged me lightly.

"Oh my god, thank God they didn't touch you," she sighed with relief. "Who did you have sex with?"

I almost choked on my own saliva when I heard her last question. I scratched my cheek, feeling it heat up as I felt embarrassed.

"D-do you really need to know who I had sex with?" I asked, stammering.

"Oh my, I'm sorry. You don't have to tell me, I might not be able to handle it, and worst, you might even detail it," she said, getting off the bed and trying to compose herself.

"Don't worry, I don't kiss and tell," I replied with a smile.

She breathed a sigh of relief at what I said.

"Good. I'll go up to the first floor and get you a Plan B. I guess this is your first time, right? And I'll also help you track your menstruation to make sure nothing slips through. We can also check you out first to find out which pills suit you best."

"Is that a thing?" I asked, furrowing my brow.

"Of course," she replied with a smile. "Don't worry, I'll take care of you so you don't get pregnant. Do you want kids?" she joked.

My eyes widened at her question. Do I want kids? My heart raced as suddenly, Helios' smiling face appeared in my mind, looking at me with a soft and gentle expression. I swallowed hard and quickly tried to push that thought away. I do want kids... if he's the one I marry. But not now. I don't want that now because our situation is still too complicated to think about getting pregnant.

And why am I even thinking about this!? I'm still too young to have kids. I should be enjoying being single—no, not single... We admitted to each other that we love each other, so I guess we're in a relationship. I sighed at my own thoughts and looked up to see that Ria was waiting for me to answer her question.

"Y-yes, of course. Who wouldn't want that?" I stammered. Who wouldn't want kids if the father is Helios?

I tightly shut my eyes as his sweaty face from that moment of intimacy between us flashed in my mind. Calm down, Hexia!

She smiled at me. "That's good to hear. Stay here and don't sleep until you've taken your pills. I'll be quick," she said, rushing out.

I nodded. "Sure. I'll wait here."

I saw her rush toward the closed door, but she stopped to glance back at me.

"Do you think you two will have sex again?" she asked. "Plan B is only taken once, Hexia, because it's an emergency pill. If you're going to be sexually active, I suggest that after taking the emergency pill, you follow it up with regular contraceptive pills," she explained.

I nodded slowly. "Yes, sure. Please bring the regular contraceptive pills you mentioned. I'll wait for you here. Thank you, Ria."

She smiled at me. "Okay! Stay here, I'll be quick."

I didn't reply, watching her run out of my room. Slowly, I lay down on my side and stared blankly at the closed door.

"If you're going to be sexually active, I suggest that after taking the emergency pill, you follow it up with regular contraceptive pills."

"If you're going to be sexually active, I suggest that..."

I clenched my eyes shut as Ria's voice echoed in my mind.

"I guess I'll be sexually active..." I whispered to myself.

SHANGPU