Book: The Sky Is Yellow by Radiaamaya

Reviewer: Dystopian_Quxxn

Chapters read: 3, plus the characters, prologue, and dedication/mood board.

First off, thank you so much for letting me read your book and getting the opportunity to help you grow as a writer!

My first impressions were high after seeing the details you have added in the first few chapters. Since I didn't read most of the book, I haven't got the ability to see how it progresses; but, my first impression was, I thought this was a neat concept, easy to understand, but easy to add several plot twists and turns, which can be very exciting for a reader! If I were to rate this, it would be 9/10.

Title: Having read only 3 chapters, the title doesn't give much information to the story. That can be good and bad, at the same time. It can easily allure readers into wanting to know more, while it can push certain readers away. I do love the title, as it is unique and vulnerable; however, I am wondering how important it is to the book? Does it cover the main theme of the book enough? A title is like the logline, telling you what you're diving into, while letting you guess why it's called that. Just make sure the title fits the whole theme of the story. Such stories are: Harry Potter series- each subtitle goes with the theme, telling you what you're going to read. Another example: The Hunger Games- this book tells you exactly the purpose of the story. While you may also have a title like The Catcher in the Rye, which is a subtle title, one that catches your eye, and makes you really think about the overall theme of the story. That all being said, I think the title is alluring! Just make sure it fits the overall theme. 8/10

Cover: This cover is very simple, and goes easily with the title and the blurb. It also catches my attention when first peering through books; however, the cover isn't exceptional as it is on the plain side—which can be fine. You just want the cover to convey a secret message for others to discover. Does the picture in the cover make sense? Is there a direction to it? Does it follow the story plot line? Does it convey a message? Does it go with the theme? Make sure you know these answers when having a cover. I like the cover though. It is simple, though the blue sticks out awkwardly. I would somehow make it blend with the rest of the picture, without taking the blue away, since it means something, or so, the blurb hints. Overall, I'd give it a 8/10

Blurb: This blurb definitely gives you a mystery when reading it. When I read it, I wanted to dive into the book! My only suggestion is really touching on the grammatical errors and spelling checks, as this is the reader's first impression! Triple edit it, use a web-service, or ask a friend who knows English well. Whatever you use, utilize it, and I bet more people will read it. Overall, I'd say 9/10.

Grammar: First off, I know English isn't your first language, and I must admit, you did alright seeing it that way. That being said, I do suggest really reading through the chapters, and perhaps even reading aloud to see the hiccups in the chapters. There were several misspelled words, wrong punctuations, and just the wrong word used. That can easily be fixed. Try putting your work on a Google doc or Microsoft word, and put the primary language as English (American), and they will give you some suggestions. You can also use Grammarly or ask for an editor on Wattpad. I edit my own work, and use Google and Word docs, but I do not like using Grammarly myself, but since you are foreign to English, I think it would help immensely. Grammar is almost half the work in a novel, and shouldn't be taken lightly. That all being said, well done on the words you did use. Some were very descriptive and nicely put, so don't beat yourself up! All and all, I would give a 6/10.

Writing Style: I actually really enjoyed your style. It was humorous, descriptive, modern, and engaging. It kept me reading on. The dialogue was really good, though the action tags need some tweaking. The descriptions were pretty decent, just some misspelled and misused words. The characters were engaging, as well as their actions. My only thing is, the fast-paced scenes. Some were cut short while others dragged on to an unnecessary point. Make sure to pace your story right. This is a huge issue a lot of writers have, and is challenging for everyone. Everyone wants to get the story started and get the fun parts grooving, but we can't cut short the smaller sections, or else, just cut the scenes altogether. I understand the pain of putting fillers between certain scenes, but they are very important and just as necessary as the main scenes. Some of your scenes were cut, having no fillers at all, which can cut the emotion and actual scene, leaving out certain details that readers will question. Overall, I'd give a 19/25

Plot: This seems like a small plot that can have lots of twists and turns! That being said, the plot is cliché and unoriginal. Plots are near impossible to have original, but it's the twists and characters that make the story unique. I hope there are plenty of twists and turns, as well as good development of the plot. Don't rush the plot though. Keep it steady, and don't ask too many twists that you lose the actual main plot. Plotting is hard, and I always want to change it. I don't know if anyone else has that problem, but I always want to change things. Just make sure, each scene fits with the main plot, even if it's a small detail you want your readers to know. Overall, I'd give a 7/10.

Character: They seem nice and have their stories that might be introduced later in the story. I like some of their humor, as well as the main character's snarky comments. My only complaint is their names. I get them all mixed up, and they all get introduced at once. It can be hard to put name and character together when that happens. Several books introduce their characters all at once, and make it a maze to learn each character. That can be a hassle and annoying. You need each character to be distinct. Especially the main characters. I do like the boards and profiles you made for them, but I definitely don't want to keep using that as a guide to remember each character. Just remember to have distinct characterization for each character. Even make backstories. I like to write in their own POVs, on a separate doc, with simple scenarios just to feel around the character. I also like to make character profiles, stating their appearance, back story, special features, and traits, such as strengths, weaknesses, likes, and dislikes. It's important to know your characters, but you want your readers to also know the characters.

Also, ensure they are different, as you did make 2 POVs from what I've read already. We don't want them to sound the same. Their "writing voice" should be different, same with their descriptions. One shouldn't say "I saw the pink, bubbly van drive up", and then the other one say the same thing. Find another description you think they'd say. Like, "I saw the rose pink, booming van tear its way up the street." All and all, I'd give it a 12/15.

Overall Enjoyment: From what I read, I enjoyed it. The grammar did set me back a little, as well as some of the cutscenes that felt short and abrupt. The characters had a nice rhyme to them, but I needed more distinction. The plot was average, and in the first few chapters, doesn't give much away. I do love romance stories, and I think this story has serious potential. My enjoyment was 7/10.

Overall: 85/110

Again, thanks for letting me review this! I hope you take my advice, and keep on writing!