Black and White (by DeathBlade__)
*Note: Prologue - Chapter 3 were read

Book cover - 5/5

The monochrome palette fits the grimness of the story's mystery and the font is beautiful.

P.S. I love the aesthetics! After journeying with the characters I think it suits them well and the face claims are how I'd imagine them irl, too.

Book title - 4/5

The title fits the story well, although I believe you can make it stand out more because there are a lot of books called "Black and White."

Book description - 3/5

It's very engaging! It summarizes the story but doesn't give too much away, like a good movie trailer to hook audiences in.

I noticed the common use of the word "had" in the blurb. Personally I prefer blurbs with the majority of their tenses in the present because it gives a vibe of - This is happening right now. You need to find out why it did now. Read my book now. If past tense is used, the vibe sort of becomes - This happened, it's all in the past. The characters already solved their problems, nothing to see here.

There's also some filler words, but blurbs usually get straight to the point. There's also some phrases such as "confined to the university building" that seem abrupt, as the readers wouldn't know or care about said university building, and it could break the tension of the blurb.

Here's how I'd reword some lines of the blurb. I added some 2nd person nouns such as "you" to invoke a stronger sense of invitation to the reader:

Evelyn Turner made a promise to herself: to turn her life around. [...]

Life isn't easy when everyone belittles you and chalks up your prowess to your parents' fame. So when Levi Coleman asks her to vie for his innocence, she could hardly refuse this chance to prove herself.

[...] There is someone controlling behind the scenes - someone she knew. The arson fire is not merely a crime, but the start of a dangerous threat to *city/town*.

With her past on one side and the prosecutor on the other, she has nowhere to turn to but mystery. Here, there is no black and white; everyone is in the gray.

Prologue - 3/5

The plot was engaging and I especially liked the last line, "I will make you proud." It serves as two things: first, a signal that this is how Evelyn was motivated to be a lawyer. Second, it made me turn to the next page. Well done!

I was confused with two things. First, is the lawyer defending her her uncle? I could not infer if she called the lawyer "uncle" out of fondness or because they're actually related.

Second, what are the charges held against Evelyn? She seems too young to have commited a crime. I understand this may be explained later, but it'd be nice to leave a clue or two so that readers won't be reading the prologue in confusion. Rather, they should be intrigued.

Plot - 12/20

You asked for my thoughts on how interesting the book is. My answer is… very! The execution just has room for improvement.

Chapter 1 - I like that you introduced us to Evelyn's workplace, the relationships she has, and a flare of her personality. It's combined very well and flows smoothly!

In the other hand, I don't prefer stories to start with morning routines/at home and going to workplace. My attention is seized more if the story opens with a drastic event in the workplace, and the protagonist then goes home. This pacing is more dramatic in showing the difference between workplace and home, and potentially the person's character. For example, in the office the person may appear calm and collected, but at home his room is full of drawings and he actually hates his job because it restricts his creativity. See? There's this surprise/curiousity factor in it.

Chapter 2 - This chapter is my favorite out of the 4 I've read. I really like sympathizing with "antagonists", and since Levi would be the "antagonist" here for setting a fire in Virginia University, I find him intriguing. You described his trauma very well by simplifying it to the color orange. It subverts the readers' expectations; when we think of criminals we think of them as evil, pyschos, and can't-be-salvaged. But here we see that Levi is as frail and insecure as a quiet kid in school. It frames him in that "gray" area this story promotes. Ah! Love it!

Chapter 3 - This one has a couple of interactions between Evelyn and Noah, and Evelyn and Levi. This is a good chance to showcase the differences between the two boys and how Evelyn switches from a homier side to her bf, to a more professional one to her clients (more on character interactions later). I have one question. Why does Evelyn want to help Levi so eagerly? Personally, if I was a lawyer, I'd have a hard time defending a criminal. Does Evelyn feel it in her heart that Levi is innocent in a way? If she does, it could be made clearer. Perhaps add a line of thought or two about it.

Since this is a mystery novel, I must also comment on the mystery itself. So far in its beginning, it's good! I like it! You have piqued my interest and I want to uncover the truth. The blurb makes me curious to know how Evelyn and the mastermind behind the crime are related.

The willingness to uncover the truth and the willingness to do so with the characters go hand-in-hand. Now, here are my takes on the…

Characters - 6/10

When I read/watch a mystery novel/movie, execution is not the only key. I also have to like the detectives sleuthing in the case; it greatly enhances my experience and makes the story more exciting. Not only do I see the mystery unfold, but also the characters grow.

I feel the characters could be more dimensional. By which I mean, they could have more traits that would pique the readers' attention. The characters themselves are like mysteries for the reader to solve. Isn't it fun? The character discovers more about the mystery while the reader discovers more about the character? The reader ofc can do both, but in the scenario that they aren't adept at solving cases, at least they enjoy the characters!

I know I've only read the beginning of your story, but it's vital to make a strong impression at this time about the characters' personalities. Readers need to see already how the characters differ from each other so that they can look forward to their interactions.

Without further ado, here are my suggestions:

Evelyn - She's got a blunt attitude, wit, and a sharp tongue. I'd like to see at least one or two of her flaws/weaknesses. Is she physically weak? Can she not stand the sight of dead bodies and has a weakness to murder cases? I'd also like to see more comparisons on living normally vs. being a lawyer.

Levi - I think it's pretty obvious that he's my favorite character so far. His personality is well-rounded and I want to learn more about him. His actions, thoughts, and dialogue are written in such a way that I can clearly feel how afraid, closed-off, and anxious he is.

Noah - His personality could shine a bit more. I understand he seems to be the caring, protective, ideal bf, but I want to see more to him. What is he like as a person, not a bf? From his moodboard I assume he's a prosecutor, so it'd be nice to drop a hint or three about that.

Pacing - 7/7

You also asked for my thoughts on the pacing, and I think it’s good! No moment felt too short or too long, and the timeskips are reasonable. I also like the length of the chapters, they are what I call "bite-sized" - just enough to satisfy me, but not too much that I get bored.

Enjoyment - 5/7

I love your writing style, it reminds me of Rick Riordan's! It is very animated and I like that you use more than just thoughts to potray someone's emotions. I would be more engaged in the mystery if the characters had a little more oomph (as I explained before.)

Writing technique - 9/10

You write very well! Other than Mr. Riordan it also reminds me of my favorite mystery novel series Enola Holmes.

I suggest you use more figures of speech (I think irony, metaphors, and a little humor would work well with this story) to enhance your book. Remember when I said you should let your characters' personalities shine more? You can do that by using more expressive dialogue or actions for the respective character.

Grammar/spelling/vocab - 8/10

You're proficient in this aspect! There are only some spelling mistakes and repetitive words that can easily be edited.

Overall - 62/84

Thank you for being extremely patient with my review! I know it's been almost a month and I'm sorry for the wait; however, I hope I made it worth your time and my insight was helpful.

I do not know much about how law works; it's incredibly comprehensive and strict, so I can only imagine how extensive the needed research is for this book. However, I believe you are more than capable to use this intriguing, almost imperial enviornment to spin a good story.

What I'd really like to repeat is that execution is key.The mystery is the heart of this novel, and the characters, settings, and developments are the veins that pump and bring it to life. They give this story life.

With that said, I wish you good luck on writing Black and White!