Reviewed by _Swaralee_ for pinkenme

Thank you for choosing me to review your book!

Cover: 09/10

I truly love the current cover. It's simple, it's dark (fitting the genre), the color gradation is just beautiful. Given the fact that Warner Hartfelt is going to be found dead in a pool, the image makes the whole mystery so much more thrilling. Though some other fonts would look more appealing. The current font is not bad, it just doesn't match the vibe of the image. Try on different fonts and see which one fits better. But even with this font, I'm very satisfied with the overall cover.

Title: 10/10

I absolutely love the title! It's smartly hinted at in the blurb and seeing how it seamlessly blends into the story is truly remarkable. The title is catchy; it's a good use of alliteration. It's very fitting. It's short and up to the mark. I genuinely appreciate the thought behind it and how it makes a lot more sense as you read the story further and further.

Blurb: 09/10

What a first line. The dialogue is from the story itself I assume and my god did that make me laugh. The rest of the blurb is quite good. It's not too long or too short. We get introduced to our main character, our main conflict and their world that's about to collapse. You have introduced the main plotline without giving away much and the best part of every blurb; the unanswered question at the end. That question is a cliffhanger and a hook point for readers. Blurbs are often overlooked when it comes to marketing a book, but when it comes to digital format or e-books, if the blurb is boring or dull, you lose potential readers. I'm glad that isn't the case here.

Opening/first impression: 10/10

The very first line in the Prologue was... well-written and the praises for it are well-deserved (get it?) It's a very catchy start, to say the least. The moment someone reads a line like this, they will definitely have so many questions. Who's Warner Hartfelt? How did he die? Why did die? Did someone kill him? The spite of curiosity that ignites reading that sentence will push readers further into the story which is always a good thing. And even the way the Prologue ends is so interesting to read.

In the first chapter, we meet our main character. Her introduction to Beverington University introduces us (the readers) as well to this place. Recovering from the prologue, there's no way one can view Beverington as a normal University. However, the description and the reference to Gilmore Girls create a scene in front of our eyes where we can view everything through Wren's eyes. Sisters of Stygian sounds like/give dark academia vibes. We get curious about one more thing during the starting paragraphs; why does Wren want to follow her mother's path? Why is she so excited about Sisters of Stygian? Too many questions!

I loved the Prologue and first chapter, I loved the way you wrote it.

Plot: 08/10

Stories featuring dark academia as a trope are something I gravitate towards. Now from what I read, the plot revolves around Wren and Sisters of Stygian and the 'deadly' turn of events that will somehow drag Wren into the mess. This is a brilliant plotline. It's suspenseful, it's tense, it has the ability to keep the readers hooked!

Dialogues: 09/10

I truly relish the moments when I get to engage in dialogues of a story. They present the unique traits, thoughts, and distinctive speaking styles of the characters. They skillfully blend into the narrative, either pushing the plot forward or giving fresh insights into the characters' personalities. In this particular instance, I must say that this delicate balance was executed perfectly. There was no doubt in my mind who was saying what while reading.

In terms of grammar and punctuation, I couldn't find any slip-ups. Maybe I was paying too much attention to what was happening and got so invested in the story that I didn't critically examine every dialogue. They didn't stall the narrative and didn't make me stop and think what was going on. And honestly, that's all you need.

Characters: 08/10

Wren Brennan, our central protagonist, is expecting and looking forward to following in her mother's footsteps. She is confident about herself and doesn't take crap from anybody. So far, she is a very likable character.

Now as I got further and further into the story, I was so intrigued and confused as to why someone so charming as Warner Hartfelt would have a death that was 'well-deserved'. So far Warner seems like a nice guy, a people's person. What happened and who did he piss off? Why did he die? Someone definitely killed him, but why? His character is going to be so interesting to read.

All the other characters, like Mina and Ariana and Kim and Noemy, are mysterious, but Noemy the most. All the characters are very different from each other. They all have their individual voices and personalities which makes them stand out. Good job there.

Quality of conflict: 09/10

The stakes are high. Wren is not going to have a normal life at Beverington University, the mess is going to catch up to her and she will have no choice but to protect herself. She will have her Sisters of Stygian though they didn't start on the right foot. However, she will have to navigate her way out as well. The conflict is pretty spot-on for a genre like this. It's filled with mysteries and possibilities.

Writing skills: 07/10

As you have written the story in the third person, there are only two options to follow through: the narrative to be either like an umbrella voice for every character or follow a single character throughout the chapter. You chose the second one and rightfully so, the majority of today's authors do as well. But what I noticed is that within a chapter, you shift the focus from one character to the other. It pulls a reader out of the narrative for a while. When you choose a character (in this case, Wren) and decide to tell the story through their voice and eyes, you shouldn't tell us how the other characters act, interact or think. I would suggest working on that a little whenever you decide to edit.

Apart from that, the writing style, grammar, vocabulary, punctuation were on point. I couldn't find any mistakes. The writing style you have opted for is simple yet the downfall around the corner is very evident throughout. That's skillful writing.

Reader enjoyment: 09/10

Personally, I loved the story. The looming doom around all the characters, the innocence they were about to lose after Warner's death made it so much more exciting. All the characters are very well written. Great concept, great execution.

Total: 88/100

Other suggestions: As I mentioned, the third-person narrative could use some work. Try to get into Wren's head and narrate the story the way Wren sees it, or discovers it. Follow Wren's thought process or her way of thinking. That's all. So far, good writing and good storyline. Good luck!