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I slowly nibbled on my toast as the conversation droned between the brothers. Dorian sat directly in front of me sporting a black eyes and a bruised jaw avoiding my gaze. I feared that his wounds had something to do with what happened last night. I hoped that it had nothing to do with that because then it would just drive him away further and that was the last thing I wanted.

I nudged Zane a little as I asked, "Is he okay?" gesturing to Dorian. My voice was barely above a whisper as I didn't want Dorian to hear.

"Well depends on how you mean," he replied, "Physically, he's just fine but his ego's well beyond 'just bruised'," He snickered at the end and I let out a breathy chuckle at his words. After everything these brothers went through, they still had that pure bond. Nothing came between and I just wished to experience it at least once, even if it all ends up being some elaborate lie.

"Zane," Octavian's sharp voice cuts through any conversation me and Zane or Zion and Dorian were having. Every pair of eyes in the room directed their way towards him as he continued, "Did Maria come in early today?" He asked. My eyebrows furrowed in confusion as I looked at all of them who were now looking at Zane for an answer.

"I don't know, I slept in today but I guess I get what you mean," He replied.

"W-what do you mean?" I asked in a timid voice looking at Zane instead of Octavian.

"Oh Maria is the one who tidies up our rooms regularly, she usually comes around 11 but our rooms are already cleaned today, so yeah, we were just discussing if she came early," Zane explained.

"Oh y'all are talking about the rooms," I muttered as realization struck me, "I cleaned them," I said with a little smile as look back at my plate proud of myself.

"Why?" Zion asked, his voice a bit louder.

"Attention seeker," Dorian mumbles, shaking his head as he stabs his pancakes with his fork. I looked away from him as my chest constricted. I don't know what to do anymore. I have been trying. Doing everything they asked me to do and going out of my way to help them. That's the only way I know how to mend relationships and help others. But it isn't working here. I swiftly blink back tears as I look at Zion.

"Dorian," Octavian snaps, "Do we need a repeat of yesterday night?" He asked, his voice cold and sharp. My head whips back to Octavian as I look at him with wide eyes. Dorian was glaring at his plate at Octavian's threat but he did manage to grit out a 'no,'

"Then I suggest you watch your mouth," Octavian gritted out. I watched them have the conversation in distress. It's been a day, one day since I've arrived and I've already caused a fight between two of my brothers. 

"Now, Astria," Octavian turned his attention towards me and I tensed, clearing my face of any other emotion. "Why did you clean our rooms, you know that you didn't have to, right?" He asked, his voice a lot softer now. The twins looked at me in anticipation as did Octavian.

Is this some kind of trap? Are they going to punish me if I agreed with them?

I took a few deep breaths. Mom had already tried this trick a few time and I have learnt my lesson. I'm not sure if mom asked them to do this but I'm not going to destroy this. I'm not.

"Of course I had to, you told me to," I replied as I fiddled with the end of my hoodie. In an instant all eyes turned towards Octavian. The twins opened their mouth to say something but one look from Octavian shut them up.

My eyes widened as I realized what this is supposed to mean. Are they really playing dumb so that I confess before find out and they punish me.

"Look, if this is about the time thing I'm sorry. I didn't know what time you guys woke up. I don't know how it happened, but I assure you it won't happen again. I can wake up at five four even if you want. You don't have-" 

Octavian stopped my rant here by interrupting me. His emotionless face and eyes gave nothing away as he looked at me. I took deep breaths as he watched me clam down. "I did not tell you to clean the rooms, Astria," He said. Even though his face was expressionless and stone hard, his voice was soft. 

"B-but you told me to follow the rules mum laid out," I muttered pathetically, looking down at my hands.

"Was this one of the rules?" Zion asked, his voice holding a tinge of anger. I tensed, I hated it when anyone got angry with me especially mum and now my brothers but I nodded nonetheless.

"What was this rule?" This time it was Octavian who asked the question.

"Uh that I have to clean the occupied rooms before she woke up," I replied still not looking at any of them.

There was a moment of silence before Octavian spoke up, "Well then, you don't have to follow that rule here. Also, can you tell me about your routine when you lived with Eleanore?" He asked.

I hesitated, contemplating whether I should tell them or not. I looked up slowly to see Octavian with a hard look and anger shining in his eyes. And with that I decided that it would be best if I agreed with everything they say.

"Uh so that was the first thing after that I made breakfast. Then after she had had her breakfast, she would leave for work. I would get ready and walk to school. After I came home I had to clean the living room and a few other extra places. Then at two I would leave for the dance school. At six I had a shift at the cafe and I came home around eight thirty. Then I made dinner because it had to be ready before mom came home. She came home around 9.30 from work, we had dinner and after that I had to clean the kitchen. Around eleven I would sit down to study and at one I would go to bed. So yeah, that was my schedule," I finished with a small smile on my face.

"You literally cleaned the whole house and did all the work that Eleanore should have been doing," Zane said, his eyes wide.

"Well she did work and brought home money. Plus her job was physically exhausting so it's only fair if I helped her with the household work," I said, shrugging.

"She worked?" Zion asked, his voice loud.

"Of course she did, how do you think we lived," I asked rhetorically and he just shrugged in answer.

"You danced for four hours and then did all of the work?" Zane asked.

"Uh no, my class was from 4 to 6. I danced for only two hours," I clarified.

"But you left at two?"

"Yeah, I worked for the other two," I shrugged as if it was obvious.

"You already worked at the cafe?" Zane exclaimed, his voice loud.

I jumped a little in my chair, startled at the loud exclamation from him. My eyes wide as I replied to him, "Well, I did need to pay for the classes. The cafe thing didn't cover it so I worked at the studio to cover the fees."

Hearing this both the twins broke out into a rant as I flinched at their loud voices. I didn't know what they were making a big deal out of. My breathing deepened as Dorian stood up in front of me, pushing his chair back dramatically as he stomped off outside the dining room, his breakfast only half eaten.

I clutched the edge of the table as the voices became louder and louder. It was mom shouting at me to do better and work more all over again. The beer bottles, glass shards everywhere including on my hands and back, it was all coming. It was like I had buried these memories. Locked them somewhere in the back of my head so I didn't have to think about them but it was all coming back now. Each scenario is more vivid than the other. I was looking, unblinking, at the wooden table in front of me as the tears flowed down my cheeks.

Before I knew it, someone was softly peeling hands away from the table. My hands were then engulfed by rough warm ones as someone repositioned my body. I could hear someone calling me. A finger snapped in front of my eyes as I flinched back, blinking. I refocused my eyes as I looked around to see Zane right in front of me, holding my hands as a concerned look washed over his face.

"You're fine, ok. You're here with me and Zion and Octavian. You're safe. Just focus on my voice," He murmured soothingly. I could feel a hand running up and down my back, trying to calm me as my grip tightened on Zane's hands. 

I crane my neck to side with little effort and see Octavian kneeling down beside my chair, rubbing my back softly. For once his guard was down, he looked human, he looked like the brother I had left behind. 

"Okay, now, can you tell me 4 things you can see?" Zane asked me, his voice still soft.

I nod lightly as I looked around me, "T-the table," I said and took a pause. Zane nodded slightly, encouraging me to continue, "You, M-mr. Crawford, pla-tes," I said as my grip on Zane become tighter.

"Good, you're doing good, next, can you tell me three things you can feel?" He asked.

"Your hands?" He nodded in answer, "Mr. Crawford rubbing my back and the… the cushion of the chair?" I asked again and he nodded while smiling at me. I could feel my breathing get slower and back to its normal state but I was still on alert with a death grip on Zane's hands.

"Amazing, two things you can smell?" He asked.

"The eggs and you guys' cologne," I mutter looking at my legs instead of him now.

"You're doing great, great, now one thing you can taste?" He encouraged me to speak.

"The toast I had," I whispered. Octavian's hand had slowed down but it was still there. He did not stand up, observing me with cold, calculative eyes. He had put his guard back up.

"Okay?" Zane asked.

"Okay," I replied in a whisper as I abruptly stood up. Octavian's hand fell to his side as did Zane's. I walked back a few steps, still looking at them with wide eyes as Zion appeared on my side.

"Water?" He asked as he extended his hand. Only then I noticed he had a glass of water in his hand.  His face, like Zane's, shone with concern and curiosity.

I just shook my head at him as I looked back the other two, "I-I'm sorry, I don't know what happened, I just really really sorry," I apologized as I kept walking backwards.

"It's alright, you don't have to apologize. It happens to the best of us. So, don't worry about it. If you want to talk about it and like what triggered-" As soon as he started speaking the last sentence I knew I had to get out of there. 

"I'm really sorry," I turned my back on them as I ran as fast as I could, ignoring their calls behind me. I flew up the stairs and into my room and closed the door behind me. Sky jumped into arms yipping softly as I walked to the closet. The lock of the main door was fixed yet and right now, I just wanted some privacy. 

I brushed my fingers through Sky's soft fur. This action always seemed to calm me down. I've been doing this since I got Sky. She has seen the cruelty of my mom and how she will to make you understand she's right, even though she's not. Everytime I would enter my room with a forlorn expression, it seemed like Sky knew that something had happened. She would sit with me whimpering softly, locking as I cried my heart out.

This time it was different. Nothing was wrong. Nobody has shouted at me. Nobody had hurt me. Nothing was wrong except for me.

After a few hours of sitting on the closet floor, watching the white walls blankly, a knock resounded on my door. I stood up and walked out of the closet and set Sky down on the soft white rug on the floor.

I opened the door a little and peeked through the little crack. Zion stood on the other side of the door frame, whistling as he waited for me. I opened door and he stopped. 

"You aren't ready yet?" He asked, his eyebrows raised and his voice loud. 

I quietly shook my head as he facepalmed. "Get ready," He sighed, "You have fifteen minutes. I'll be waiting with Zane in the driveway."

I nodded in reply and closed the door as soon as he turned his back on me. I quickly changed into a black hoodie and blue jeans as I tied my hair up into a ponytail. I barely had three hoodies with me and two pairs of jeans which I could wear on alternate days. I also had a crop top and a pair of denim shorts but after taking today's weather into consideration, I decided on the trusty hoodies.

Sliding on my black high tops, I walk out with Sky at my heels. I quickly left the house and saw both the twins on their phones. I cleared my throat drawing their attention towards me. 

"You're wearing that?" Zane exclaimed as he scanned me up and down. 

"Shut up," Zion snapped at him and he muttered out a sorry.

"I can go change it if you like," I said. I didn't really mind. It made sense. My brothers were famous people and they wouldn't want to be seen with a girl wearing hand-me-downs. 

"No, you don't have to change. It's alright, you can wear whatever you want, just don't pay attention to dipshits," Zion said with a smile. I returned his smile with a small one of my own as he continued, "Sky can stay with Matthew here," He said gesturing towards a guard with a black suit that stood on the sidelines.

"Sky's a little wary of strangers so I'm not sure how this is going to pan out. Plus, I would rather not stress her," I mutter fumbling with the edge of my hoodie.

"Don't worry, she will be fine with him," He said, a soft smile still grazing his lips, "Matthew will keep sending you pictures of her every half-hour so that you know that she's fine with him, yeah?" He asked and I nodded in reply. Matthew came forward and with a nod of acknowledgement towards me, he bent down to Sky's level.

Sky growled softly as she studied Matthew's nearing hand to pet her. She bent down in a defensive position and I knelt down. I consoled her a little and petted her. Making sure that she was comfortable with Mathew I stood and looked at the twins blankly.

"Well, what are you waiting for? Get in the car," Zion said with a smirk as they both slid into the front seats. I shook my head with a small smile as I followed their lead and sat down in the back.

***

I walk down the streets with posh shops on both side as the twins accompanied me. They flanked my sides with humongous bags from pet smart. I kept asking them if they wanted me to carry anything but they kept denying every single time. Suddenly they stopped. I stopped right beside them and looked at them in confusion.

"Okay, so we need to visit that shop as well," Zion said, point to the one in front of which we had stopped. I looked up to the sign board which I couldn't understand as it was in another language. I looked back down as the automatic doors opened. My eyes widened at my eyes landed upon rows of pointe shoes, ballet slippers and leotards.

"What for?" I asked drawing the sentence. I did not move my eyes away from the bright lights that shined on the shoes. 

"Octavian asked to get you new dance things," Zane muttered, walking inside.

"Why?" I asked as Zion took my hand and led me inside. I let out a sigh as the warm atmosphere surrounded me. I was an appreciated change after walking down the street with the chilly wind blowing past.

"Um, so that you can join a new studio here," He replied as if it was obvious.

"No, really. It's fine, I don't need to join a new studio. I think I'll be fine, plus, I'm not here for long," I replied shrugging as I turned back, ready to walk out.

"Half a year is lot and you yourself told us that you have to keep practicing," Zane replied, reminding of a conversation we had when I was six.

"I was a kid back then," I sighed.

"You still are but that's not the point," He replied, " What you said was true, plus I don't think your dance instructor would be very happy if you forget half of what you've learnt."

"I don't forget things," I said with a small frown gracing my lips.

"Alright, no need to get defensive. You can skip the whole studio thing if you like but we're getting you new things. It's always nice to have new things," Ziom said, pulling me in the direction of the slippers.

"Just yesterday I told you guys not spend money so uselessly and here we are," I muttered shaking my head.

"Just yesterday we told you that we like spoiling you so yes, here we are," Zane retirted as he joined us. I narrowed my eyes at him. 

They were being sweet, some things excluded but they were being very accoeting if the fact that just barged into their lives disrupting everything. And I was grateful for that but if this continues for the next six months, it's going make leaving them so fucking hard.

For the past months I always though how amazing it would be to be back on track with my brothers but I never pondered upon the leaving part. It's going hurt so much to leave them again. I had no gaurantee that they woukd contact me later. That six year-old-child once had a lot of expectation but she grew up and saw the malice of the real world and now she knows nkt to have expectations because no matter how close you are, people never hesitate to let you down. Doesn't matter if it's family or friends, they just break your heart and walk away as if they didn't leave a six-year-old to pick the pieces of the heart they had broken.

"Astria?" A hand landed on my shoulder as I jerked away. A hurt looks passes Zion's face but it was gone as soon as it came. Guilt settled in the pit of my stomach as he smiled sadly, "Are you alright? You look a bit shaken," He asked as hus eyebrows furrowed together.

I smile lightly as I rest my hand on top of his as a way to indicate that I don't mind him and that it's not his fault.

It is though.

I ignored the little voice at the back of my head as I nodded. "I'm fine, don't worry," I assured him.

"I- Alright, just take care," He sighed, "Anyways, let's take a look yeah? You can choose what you like," He said, a smile overtaking his face. My eyes lit up at his smile as I nodded in response.

I just know that no matter how hard I hate them, despise them for all the times they ignored me, I could never hold a grudge against them. And that is the problem.

***
A/N

The seventh chapter folks!! I hope you enjoyed it. It is quie a long chapter and took me a long time to write that 🥲.

Also, school sucks.

AnYwAyS

Again, some of Astria's past was revealed in this chapter, I just can't wait for the brothers and you guys find out everything tragic that has happened to Astria in the past.

Don't you just love when you make your mc's past so tragic that they will murder you if they were here in real life.

Ah the peace!

Yeah, enough of my dramatic ass. So, if you liked this chapter, don't forget to vote and share!! And comment and tell me about the favourite part of this chapter!!

QOTD: What's your favorite colour?
AOTD: Blue, black if it wasn't a shade 🥲🥲.

~Ash