Chapter Nine - Boulevard of Broken Dreams
Upon leaving the Solarium, Anna felt a sense of relief. The weight of the day's events was heavy on her shoulders. She longed for the solace of a quiet walk and the opportunity to clear her thoughts.
Serena's voice filled her mind as she walked. She expressed her concern. Anna, are you okay?
Anna's sigh was heavy. "To be frank, Serena, I am exhausted," she admitted. "From dawn till dusk, my day has been a constant frenzy of activity, denying me any respite. I am tired of the charade of playing Serena. I want to be Anna Walton again. This is too much for me."
'I don't leave my house unless I need to go to work. This socialising and constant vigilance of what I say, act and carry myself. In all honesty, you have the wrong person. I can't do this, Serena; it's too much.'
Serena was silent, and Anna worried her words were too harsh.
I have had enough of your incessant whining. It's become unbearable to me. I can't do this. I can't handle that... Do you realise this is all because of you? Serena's frustration was palpable as she spoke.
This mess is your fault, Anna. It's time for you to take action and stop moping around. You aren't the only one suffering. I have no control over my body; I have to share my head with you and your self-pity, and I can't do anything about it! Serena exploded.
Anna stopped walking and stood in shock. "Serena... I... I didn't ask for any of this. You brought me here. I came here because of your choice, not mine, and I am stuck in someone else's body, someone else's life. I didn't know that my writing would cause this."
"Plenty of authors around the world write heavier stories than me. Why is my story the one that's caused such trouble? I am trying. I am Serena. Cut me some slack. I can't help what I think sometimes. Just because you hear it doesn't mean that I mean it."
Serena's words sunk in; it must be hard for her to be a party to Anna's relentless negativity. Anna knew it was for her.
"I am sorry, Serena. I see that it's been hard for you, too. Of course, it must be you are a passenger in your own body. We are both on edge. A lot is going on. Perhaps we should discuss this another time." Anna's tone softened, realising the gravity of the situation.
Serena's voice was heavy with weariness as she continued. Anna, being privy to your negative thoughts and having to perk you up is exhausting. I share your doubts, but we must not let them define us. Zara needs us. We need to make this work.
Anna noticed the magnitude of Serena's suffering.
"You're right, I'm sorry. I must push myself to work harder and be stronger. I wish I could be more like you, Serena. It seems like you can handle anything that comes your way. I envy that about you."
Anna looked down, her frustration and exhaustion clear in her posture. "I'll try, Serena, I will."
Serena remained sceptical. It's just... Anna, it's like you're treating this as a temporary holiday from your life. Your excitement at visiting the places you created blinds you to the fact that this is my life, our world. You're like a tourist, free to leave. I'm the one who has to live with the consequences.
Anna didn't have a response. The tension between them hung in the air, thick and palpable.
Anna, I am tired too. I want my body back. Although I want to help... I can't. The frustration is unbearable.
"Of course it must be. I don't want to fight with you, Serena. You and Constance are everything to me. In my world, I have no one. In this world, no one knows me. I don't belong anywhere." The gravity of the situation overwhelmed Anna.
Anna, we don't have time for your existential crisis. I understand. The potential outcome of our struggle against chaos and restoration of order also worries me. Worries are nothing but worries. They won't change anything. Do, don't just think. Her tired voice reasoned.
"You're right, Serena. My thoughts consume me. I will do better."
I have no other words. We need some space, Anna. I'm going to disconnect for a bit. I need to focus on the magic once the sun goes down. Let's talk a little later. Serena faded out fast.
The clash with Serena left Anna feeling isolated. The journey to the penthouse became blurred, her surroundings not registering in her distracted mind.
As she traversed the path, Serena's words echoed in her thoughts. She knew Serena was right. When she first came to Zara, it was a dream come true. It was an escape from her reality and life.
The realisation struck that this fictional world was their reality—it was their home. Anna couldn't shake the concern that her thoughtlessness might have upset Serena.
Each step was like an uphill climb, the burden of fatigue clear in slumped shoulders. Her temples throbbed, reflecting the mental strain and deepening exhaustion, protesting with every movement.
This pain was a stark reminder of the day's diplomatic formalities and the ceaseless charade of embodying Serena's persona.
Anna grappled with the emotional toll of stepping into Serena's life. Was she emotionally distant? Observing Serena's life as an outsider. Or did she still genuinely connect emotionally to her characters?
The stark contrast between Serena's lively social world and Anna's past solitude persisted in every action. She withdrew into her mind, observing Serena's social life with robotic precision. She longed to avoid direct gazes and to fade into the background at social events.
Exhausted, Anna sought solitude from the day's toil, escaping to Serena's room, avoiding conversations and the crowd.
***
In search of solace, Anna climbed the stairs to Serena's calming bedroom. A creaking door welcomed her to a sanctuary far removed from her life. Soft light from the bedside lamp created a warm haven, offering an escape from the outside world.
Serena's life brimmed with love and respect, her words wielding influence and her actions carrying weight. It was a stark departure from Anna's past, where writing had been her refuge from a life tainted by loneliness, inadequacy, and despair.
Anna's gaze drifted to the framed photographs on Serena's dresser, capturing shared laughter, loving looks, and affectionate interactions. Faces frozen in time, each snapshot told a story of Serena's vibrant connections. Anna had a wave of envy and curiosity, yearning for the authenticity embedded in those memories.
The room, adorned with mementoes of Serena's rich relationships, contrasted with the starkness of Anna's past. She recalled specific instances—a heartfelt conversation, a shared adventure, a look filled with understanding. Serena's life overflowed with people who loved and respected her. Her words carried weight, and what she did mattered.
Leaning against her bedroom wall, Anna sighed, realising the world she created to escape loneliness had become a gilded cage, making her question her place and feel insignificant. The crafted universe, once a source of belonging, had transformed into a paradoxical prison of conflicting emotions, prompting Anna to question her existence.
Doubts flooded Anna as questions swirled in her mind. In the name of her story, Anna acknowledged she had caused them much pain.
Anna's sigh brought a flood of doubts about her characters' reactions to discovering her true identity: disappointment, anger, doubt about her ability to meet expectations, and uncertainty about her role as their author.
The characters she felt most connected to, her literary confidantes, always occupied her thoughts. Her perfectionism intensified her fears with the pressure to meet the characters' expectations and deliver narratives that lived up to their complexities bearing down on her.
The weight of her role as a creator, perhaps a puppeteer, pressed on her. Was she benevolent in crafting their destinies, or had she become indifferent?
Endless questions echoed with ethical and moral dilemmas. Was she a creator giving life or a puppeteer shaping destinies? Anna questioned if her unfinished book merged had fiction and reality, altering things with her presence.
She didn't understand her purpose here. She had played the part of Serena. Now she needed to get on with her quest. She needed to get to Wildwood Forest.
Anna wished the Storytellers hadn't been so vague. She wished she could talk to them again, but their last words rang in her ears. They couldn't tell her more at this point. What did that even mean?
Amid internal turmoil, clarity struck. Keeping up the Serena pretence was no longer viable. Living a lie wasn't an option. Only Serena and Constance knew her as Anna, and she couldn't reveal it to anyone else. The dilemma: How do we proceed without altering the cherished world of Zara?
Two sharp knocks at the door interrupted Anna's thoughts. "Come in."
The door creaked open to reveal Constance. Anna smiled, happy to see her friendly and caring face.
Constance gave a strained smile, distracted. "Ann... Serena, Miss, how lovely to see you home! You have a visitor downstairs, dear."
A visitor? That explained why Constance had called her Serena. A quiet sigh escaped her. Rather than performing, Anna wanted to be alone with her thoughts.
"Of course, Constance, thank you. Who is it?" Anna said.
"His Royal Highness Prince Leo,"
Anna froze. Oh no, anyone but him! What could he want with her? She had no energy for that man!
After a brief wait, Constance asked Anna, "Do you want me to send him up?"
"No!!" Anna's voice was high and strained. She cleared her throat. "No, thank you, Constance. I think we need more space for that kind of interaction. I will meet him in the study."
"Good thinking, dear. Will I make some tea for you?" Constance asked.
"Please, Constance."
She quickly changed out of her formal wear into a sunny yellow tunic and navy blue leggings. If she faced him, she would at least wear comfortable clothes.
She stood in front of the mirror and checked how she looked. Her flushed cheeks showed her recent walk and anticipation of an interaction, but she seemed normal.
She wished Serena was with her.
No, I can handle this; I am ready.
Anna took a breath and headed to the study.
***
Echoing in the quiet corridor, Anna's footsteps led her to the study.
As she approached the door, Anna wondered why he was there. What could he want from her?
Moonlight filtered through heavy curtains, combining with bioluminescent lights and plants to bathe the study in a knowledgeable and historical atmosphere. Ancient tomes and artefacts lined the walls, and a portrait of Serena's mother hung above the fireplace, a poignant reminder of her legacy.
Regal and commanding, Prince Leo stood in the study, leaning against the desk with a book on Solarian history in his hands. His attire exuded authority in the soft light, and his intense blue eyes locked onto Anna's, momentarily captivating her.
In an instant, Anna dismissed these thoughts, determined to stay focused.
Anna bowed. "Your Highness, welcome to my home. What brings you to visit us today?"
"Serena," Prince Leo stood tall and walked towards her. "You changed. I've never seen you in anything but a dress. You are beautiful in anything, aren't you?" He took her hand and kissed it, looking into her eyes with intensity.
Anna hesitated. The rising panic of being alone with the imposing figure that was Prince Leo weighed on her. Yet her curiosity about why he was here and his motives compelled her to stay.
A wave of exhaustion washed over Anna, and she dropped all the pleasantries and was honest with him.
"Your Highness, there is no need to flatter me. Why are you here? I am quite tired from today. I am afraid I don't have the energy to entertain you." Anna said. Her voice was firm.
Prince Leo, observing her face, seemed surprised by her candid response. "Serena, forgive me for intruding. After the signing earlier, something compelled me to see you again." His words stumbled out, a departure from the confident Prince Leo she knew.
His reply was as honest as her question, and it surprised Anna. "I see," she intoned. "Well, I'm tired, so perhaps we can do this another time..."
"Serena, do you hate me so much because I am a Polarian, and your mother died because of us? Or is it personal to me in particular?" Prince Leo's innocent question left Anna speechless.
"You... your Highness, I... I don't know how to answer that," Anna said with candid honesty.
"Serena, I know the history between our kingdoms has been fraught with conflict and pain. I've been thinking a lot about our choices and the consequences they've brought." He paused, his gaze sincere. "The signing today... it made me realise that maybe it's time for a change."
Anna hesitated, her eyes darting around the bookshelves before meeting Leo's gaze. Then, as if finding her voice again, she responded, "A change? What kind of change do you mean, Your Highness?"
"I mean a change in how we relate to each other and our kingdoms. I can't change the past, but I can choose how I approach the future. Our past interactions... haven't always been ideal, and I apologise for that. Perhaps we should look for common ground instead of perpetuating this feud." He looked into her eyes with sincerity.
Anna remained surprised. Did he have an angle here? Was he being sincere? She couldn't tell. "That's... unexpected, Your Highness. But it's also a step in the right direction. But easing tensions between Solaris and Polaris won't be easy. It'll take more than words."
"I know, Serena. It won't happen overnight, and it won't be without challenges. But I'm willing to work towards it." He met her gaze with determination. "And if you're willing to meet me halfway, we can heal the wounds that have divided us for so long."
"My father is the person you need to talk to about such matters. Your Highness, I am but an honorary diplomat. I agree with your sentiments, and I know Atl... my father will be very receptive." Her exhaustion increased as she sat on the couch.
Leo nodded, a small smile tugging at the corner of his lips. "Thank you, Serena. You look tired. The weight of the world seems to rest upon your shoulders." Leo mused.
He sat down opposite her. "Yet, despite the chaos and expectations, a part of us longs for something more. Something beyond duty and power."
Anna met his gaze, her eyes filled with curiosity. "What is it you yearn for, Prince Leo? Beyond the trappings of royalty?"
Leo's expression softened, revealing the vulnerability beneath his regal facade. "Genuine Connections. Relationships of authenticity. For someone to see me. Not just royalty."
She nodded. "I understand. I know that feeling all too well."
Anna thought about her turmoil today. In her constant facade of playing Serena, she wanted someone to see and know her as Anna. "It's easy to feel isolated; always surrounded but never known."
Leo's eyes held an undefinable depth as he looked at her. "Yes, Serena. We may be enemies on the surface, but beneath it all, I believe a common thread binds us."
Silence hung in the air as they contemplated each other's words. Outside, the moon continued its silent journey across the night sky. A knock came at the door. Constance walked in with the tea. Constance glanced at Anna, trying to assess her mood.
"Miss Serena, Your Highness, I have made a Solarian favourite for you, Solarflower tea." She said, curtseyed, and left the room.
Anna and Prince Leo sipped the beverage in silence for a moment. The odour of Solarflower tea lingered in the air. It was a delicate floral fragrance that mingled with the perfume of the surrounding books.
Leo broke the silence, his voice gentle. "Serena, would you join me on a stroll about the green space outside your building? I believe it will aid us to be in a more neutral territory."
Anna, recognising the wisdom in his suggestion, considered for a moment. The study, Serena's space, lacked the neutrality needed. The world outside, bathed in moonlight, offered a chance for a fresh start, allowing them to put aside their roles and be themselves.
"Yes, Your Highness." The prospect of this unconventional encounter piqued her curiosity. "I believe that would be best, too."
With a mutual understanding, they rose from their seats. They left the study behind. They also left behind a world filled with expectations.
***
Prince Leo held open the door, gesturing for Anna to step outside. "Shall we?" he asked, his voice a gentle invitation.
Anna nodded.
As they walked side-by-side, Anna couldn't help but notice the transformation in his demeanour. His posture had relaxed, and the weight of his responsibilities seemed to have lifted. The stillness of the night permitted them to shed their roles and pretences.
As Anna and Prince Leo entered the moonlit garden, it was dreamlike. The green space, a tranquil oasis amidst the city's hustle, featured a winding path illuminated by bioluminescent flora.
Above, an endless celestial canopy held a sparkling array of stars, casting a soft blue and silver glow. Celestial blooms glistened with an iridescent glow, while bioluminescent lights mimicked stars' patterns.
The night air carried a subtle floral sweetness, accompanied by the rustling of leaves and the distant serenade of crickets. Moonlight intensified, casting intricate patterns on the path, creating an enchanting scene in the tranquil green space.
In the serene surroundings, calm washed over Anna. Her heart beat in rhythm with the soft footsteps on the path. Entranced, she briefly escaped the weight of her responsibilities. Wanting to speak her mind, she let the moonlight draw out her thoughts.
"Moments like these make me wish we could be ourselves. That we could be free from the weight of our nations and positions," Anna expressed.
Prince Leo glanced at her, a hint of a smile tugging at the corners of his lips. "I couldn't agree more, Serena. The world often sees us as symbols, not individuals with our dreams and desires."
Their footsteps hinted at a potential alliance in this enchanting garden. Duty faded, and understanding blossomed beneath the moon and stars' watchful gaze.
The stars above seemed to twinkle as Leo spoke, his voice earnest. "I dream of a world where Solaris and Polaris can coexist harmoniously. Where we can bridge the gaps between our kingdoms."
Anna absorbed that for a moment. "That's a beautiful dream, Your Highness. And it's one I share. But it's not a simple path to tread. There are forces at play that seek to keep our worlds apart."
Leo's gaze turned serious, reflecting the moon's silvery glow. "I know, Serena. Change is a slow and arduous process that begins with understanding and empathy. As individuals, we can plant the seeds of change."
Their vision of a more united world hung in the fragile, hopeful air. Anna admired his determination, seeing a side beyond the political divide. Their peaceful world contrasted with the political one, shadows cast by moonlight making the night seem sinister.
Doubts swirled in Anna's mind, unspoken yet overpowering, hinting at deceptive tranquillity. Glancing at Leo, she shuddered, catching the moonlight in his earnest gaze. Synchronised steps to the night's symphony deepened her connection with Leo, unsettling her. She reminded herself of who he was.
Anna hesitated before speaking, her voice soft but filled with resolve. "Prince Leo, can I trust your intentions are genuine? That your desire for change isn't just another political manoeuvre?"
Leo's response was immediate, his tone dogged. "Serena, I promise you; my intentions are sincere. I seek a future where our kingdoms can prosper together. You have my word.".
Prince Leo's demeanour softened as sincerity infused his words. They both yearned for a better world, the boundaries between their roles falling away. Anna believed him; perhaps she had been wrong about his intentions. Actors like that don't exist.
Prince Leo glanced at Anna, his steps slowing. "Serena, I wasn't expecting you to be like this."
Anna's heart jumped into her throat. "Wh... What do you mean, your Highness?"
Prince Leo searched her face, perplexed at her change of demeanour.
"The rumours of you were correct in your beauty and intelligence and your loyalty. I can see those attributes in you, Serena. The rumours are true. You're spectacular."
Prince Leo looked at her, gauging her reactions, and said, "But your fiery temper and penchant for adventure are missing. There is a quiet determination, a staunch integrity, about you. We are the same, you and I."
"I... I am unsure what you are trying to say, Your Highness." Anna sputtered, his heart racing.
Prince Leo laughed. "I mean that as a compliment, Serena. I expected you to be a lot less interesting than you are."
His eyes twinkled as he watched her reaction. Anna blushed and looked away, unsure how to respond.
The garden provided a brief escape from politics, duties, and her upcoming mission. Moonlight cast intricate patterns on the path, mirroring the complexities of their lives. Yet she couldn't let her guard down.
Prince Leo was astute, noticing everything about her, stripping her of defences. But wasn't this what she wanted? Someone to know and see her? Their steps echoed on the gravel path, a rhythmic counterpoint to their candid conversation.
"I share your longing, Prince Leo; I yearn for authentic connections, for meaningful conversation, for someone to see me and not project who they think I am or should be upon me," Anna said before she could stop herself.
He turned to her, their eyes meeting as they processed her words. A shared longing for authenticity hung unspoken, and for a fleeting moment, they explored genuine connection.
Fears, hopes, and dreams flowed between their eyes, a connection beyond the confines of their titles being forged.
Anna sensed a strange danger building between them. She was suddenly eager to break this silence and escape danger. So she stepped back.
But as she did, Leo's expression shifted. His eyes widened, and anger flashed across his features. Anna noticed his sudden unease, and it perplexed her.
"Are you o..." Anna started, but a powerful arm clamped around her before she could finish her question.
Someone pressed a foul-smelling cloth against her mouth. Panic surged through Anna as she struggled to break free. A noxious odour emanating from the cloth overwhelmed her senses.
The abrupt attack also caught Prince Leo by surprise. His voice, once filled with trust, now erupted in anger and disbelief. "Alaric, explain this at once!" he thundered.
Fear coursed through Anna's veins. Following Prince Leo alone to this isolated place at night had been a reckless gamble. The toxic chemical's toll was clear—her vision blurred, and limbs grew heavy.
Chaos enveloped her world as shock, fear, and confusion tightened their grip. Despite fighting to stay conscious, suspicion cast a long shadow over her mind, and desperation drove her to interpret the unfolding crisis as consciousness slipped away.
Darkness closed in.
Anna's fading consciousness fixated on Prince Leo in the chilling moonlit park.
Suspicion clouded her fading thoughts, and the world spiralled into darkness. A chilling revelation sent shivers down her spine in her last fading heartbeat.
Prince Leo may have held the key to the ambush.
The world went black. Anna's questions remained unanswered, swallowed by the ominous night.
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