The weight of goodbye 

Jeonghan stood frozen in place, the words Seungcheol had spoken still echoing in his mind. His body felt heavy, his tears falling freely as he tried to make sense of what had just happened. The weight of Seungcheol's rejection bore down on him like a crushing tide, but amidst the storm in his heart, one thought stood out: 

He never said he didn't feel the same. He just said I don't belong here.

A spark of hope flickered within the overwhelming despair. Wiping his tears with trembling hands, Jeonghan straightened himself and whispered to the empty hallway, "He's just scared. I can convince him. We can make this work." The resolve in his voice surprised even himself. Turning on his heels, he bolted toward Seungcheol's room, his steps hurried and uneven as desperation clung to him like a shadow.

As he reached the door, his heart pounded loudly in his chest. He knocked firmly, his knuckles rapping against the wood as he called out, "Seungcheol! Please, open the door. Let me talk to you." His voice cracked, betraying the tears that threatened to spill once again. "We can figure this out. You don't have to push me away!"

There was no response.

"Seungcheol!" His voice grew louder, more frantic. The silence on the other side only fueled his desperation. His hand began pounding against the door, harder and harder, his pleas growing weaker as sobs began to overtake him. "Don't shut me out. Please! I know you care. I know you do... We can find a way through this, together!"

Finally, after what felt like an eternity, the door creaked open.

Jeonghan's breath hitched as he took in Seungcheol's disheveled appearance. His hair was a mess, his shirt partially unbuttoned, and his face looked as though he had been waging a war with himself. The usual calm and collected aura that Seungcheol carried was nowhere to be found; instead, his eyes held a storm of turmoil and pain.

"What do you want, Jeonghan?" His voice was cold, clipped, devoid of the warmth that usually wrapped around Jeonghan like a safety net.

Jeonghan stepped closer, his hands clutching the fabric of his shirt to stop them from trembling. "I want to talk to you. Please, Seungcheol. Don't do this. I know you're trying to protect me, but we can figure this out—together."

Seungcheol's jaw tightened, and he looked away, unable to meet Jeonghan's gaze. "There's nothing to figure out. This isn't up for discussion."

"But it is!" Jeonghan's voice cracked, tears streaming down his face. "You're scared, I get that. But you don't have to face this alone. Whatever you're dealing with, we can work through it. You said I didn't belong here, but... but don't you see? I belong wherever you are, Seungcheol."

Seungcheol's hands clenched into fists at his sides. "Jeonghan, stop."

"No, I won't stop!" Jeonghan stepped closer, his voice trembling with a mix of fear and determination. "I know you care about me. I can see it in your eyes, in the way you look at me, the way you've taken care of me. So why are you doing this? Why are you pushing me away?"

Seungcheol's head snapped up, his eyes blazing with frustration and anguish. "Because I have to!" he roared, his voice echoing through the hall. "Don't you get it? This isn't about what I want. It's about what's best for you. And staying here, staying with me, isn't what's best for you."

Jeonghan took a step back, momentarily stunned by the force of his words. But he shook his head, his voice quieter but no less firm. "You don't get to decide what's best for me, Seungcheol. That's my choice to make."

Seungcheol let out a bitter laugh, running a hand through his hair in frustration. "You're so naive, Jeonghan. You think love is enough? That it can fix everything? It can't. Loving me... being with me... it'll only bring you pain."

Jeonghan's heart twisted at the admission, but he refused to back down. "Then let it bring pain," he said softly. "If it means being with you, I'll take it. I'll take all of it."

The vulnerability in Jeonghan's words pierced through Seungcheol like a dagger. He turned away, his shoulders tense as he fought to maintain control. "You don't understand," he muttered, his voice barely above a whisper.

"Then make me understand," Jeonghan pleaded, stepping closer. "Talk to me, Seungcheol. Tell me what's going on. Whatever it is, we can face it together."

Seungcheol turned back to him, his expression cold and distant now. The warmth that Jeonghan had been clinging to was gone, replaced by an icy resolve. "You don't get it, do you?" he snapped. "I don't like you, Jeonghan. Whatever you think this is between us—it's not real. It never was."

Jeonghan froze, his breath catching in his throat as the words sliced through him like a knife. He stared at Seungcheol, searching his eyes for any trace of truth in the cruel words. But Seungcheol avoided his gaze, his face hard and unyielding.

"It wasn't a request for you to go home," Seungcheol continued, his voice harsh and final. "It was an order. You're leaving tomorrow, and that's the end of it. Now go to your room and get some sleep."

Without waiting for a response, Seungcheol slammed the door shut in Jeonghan's face.

Jeonghan stood there, his body trembling as the weight of Seungcheol's words crashed down on him. His knees buckled, and he sank to the floor, his hands covering his face as sobs wracked his body. The hallway felt unbearably cold, the silence suffocating as he sat there, crying until his tears ran dry.

Eventually, he forced himself to stand, his legs shaky as he made his way back to his room. The bed that had once brought him comfort now felt like a prison. He curled up beneath the blankets, clutching his pillow as fresh tears spilled from his eyes.

This was supposed to be the place where he found love, where he found safety. Instead, it felt like his heart was being torn apart piece by piece.

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Jeonghan stirred from his restless slumber, his head pounding as though it were echoing the ache in his heart. The faint sound of dragging and the soft clinking of metal pulled him fully from sleep. Opening his swollen, puffy eyes, he was greeted by an unfamiliar sight: maids bustling about his room, carefully folding his clothes and packing them into suitcases.

"What are you doing?" Jeonghan croaked, his voice hoarse from the tears that had consumed him the night before.

One of the maids paused, looking at him sympathetically. "Master Seungcheol instructed us to pack your belongings, sir. He said you're leaving today. We were told not to leave anything behind."

Her words hit Jeonghan like a physical blow. His chest tightened painfully as fresh tears welled up in his eyes. So, Seungcheol was serious. He was truly throwing Jeonghan out of his life—completely, entirely, without hesitation. For a moment, Jeonghan couldn't breathe, the weight of it pressing down on him like a suffocating blanket.

"Leave it," he whispered, barely able to get the words out as his hands clenched into fists. "I'll finish it myself."

The maids exchanged hesitant glances but ultimately nodded, stepping out of the room quietly. As soon as they were gone, Jeonghan sat on the edge of his bed, his head in his hands as silent sobs wracked his body. Why? Why was Seungcheol doing this? Was I not enough?

After what felt like an eternity, Jeonghan forced himself to his feet and shuffled to the bathroom. The cold water from the shower cascaded over his aching body, but it did little to wash away the numbness that had settled in his heart. He dried off and dressed in silence, the mundane act of putting on clothes feeling mechanical, hollow. With each step he took toward the dining room, his resolve wavered. But he needed answers. He needed to know if Seungcheol truly meant what he said—or if there was still hope.

The dining room was unusually quiet, the air thick with tension. The members were scattered around the long table, eating their breakfast in subdued silence. And there, sitting at the head of the table, was Seungcheol. He looked calm—too calm—as if nothing had happened. He ate methodically, not sparing a glance at anyone, his cold demeanor an iron wall no one dared to breach.

Jeonghan's breath hitched at the sight of him. Seungcheol was always a picture of composure, but this... this was different. This wasn't composure—it was indifference. The man who had once looked at him with such warmth now felt like a stranger.

Gathering every ounce of courage he had left, Jeonghan stepped into the room and walked to the opposite side of the table, standing directly across from Seungcheol. His presence drew the attention of everyone in the room, their curious gazes shifting between the two.

"Seungcheol," Jeonghan began, his voice trembling but steady enough to carry. "Do you really want me to leave?"

The room went still. The clinking of utensils against plates ceased, and all eyes were now fixed on the two of them. Seungcheol finally looked up, his face impassive as he met Jeonghan's tear-filled gaze. For a long moment, he said nothing, the silence stretching unbearably.

Then, slowly, Seungcheol set down his utensils and rose from his chair, dabbing his mouth with a napkin before discarding it onto his plate. His movements were deliberate, precise, as if he were preparing for a calculated strike.

"Hoshi," he said, his voice cool and detached, "drop Jeonghan at his house. Make sure all of his belongings are with him."

Hoshi blinked, clearly caught off guard. "are you serious?"

Seungcheol's gaze hardened, leaving no room for argument. "I am. He's leaving today."

The finality in his tone was a knife to Jeonghan's heart. "Seungcheol," Jeonghan whispered, his voice breaking, "you're not even going to explain? You're just... throwing me out like this?"

But Seungcheol didn't answer. He simply turned and walked away, his footsteps echoing in the heavy silence. "I have work to do," he said over his shoulder, his back to Jeonghan. "Take care of it."

He left the room without so much as a glance back, the sound of the door closing behind him a deafening punctuation to his exit.

Jeonghan stood frozen in place, his legs refusing to move as he stared at the empty doorway. The silence in the room was shattered by the sound of a chair scraping against the floor. Dino, his eyes brimming with tears, rushed to Jeonghan and wrapped his arms tightly around him.

"Hyung, please don't go," Dino cried, his voice choked with emotion. "You can't leave. This is your home too. You belong here."

Jeonghan clung to Dino, his tears falling freely now as he stroked the younger boy's back. "I don't want to go," he whispered brokenly. "I don't want to leave any of you."

Jun and Wonwoo, who had been watching the scene unfold in silence, exchanged unreadable glances before quietly excusing themselves, the heaviness of the situation too much for them to bear. Hansol approached and gently separated Dino from Jeonghan, leading the younger boy away despite his protests.

Minutes later, Hoshi appeared, his face unreadable as he approached Jeonghan. "Hyung," he said quietly, his tone tinged with a cold professionalism. "We need to go. I have work to get to."

Jeonghan nodded weakly, wiping his tears as he followed Hoshi to the car. The maids had already loaded his luggage into the trunk, and the sight of the suitcases felt like a physical representation of his shattered heart. He climbed into the passenger seat, his occasional sniffles the only sound breaking the oppressive silence during the drive.

When they finally arrived, Jeonghan hesitated, staring out at the apartment building that had once been his home. It looked the same as always, yet something about it felt foreign unwelcoming. He turned to Hoshi, his voice barely above a whisper. "Do you think... do you think he really meant it? That he wants me gone?"

Hoshi leaned against the car, his expression unreadable as he crossed his arms. "Hyung," he began slowly, "Seungcheol does what he thinks is necessary. But... I don't think this is the end. There are no real exits in this world."

Jeonghan looked at him, confused. "What do you mean?"

Hoshi smirked faintly, the corner of his mouth curling in an almost knowing way. "You'll figure it out. For now, just take care of yourself. We'll see you soon."

Without waiting for a reply, Hoshi climbed back into the car and drove away, leaving Jeonghan standing alone on the sidewalk. He watched until the car disappeared from sight before turning his gaze back to the building.

This was supposed to be home. It was supposed to bring comfort, stability. But now, all Jeonghan felt was emptiness—a hollow ache that refused to leave. He wiped at the tears streaking down his face and whispered to himself, "Is this what real heartbreak feels like?"

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A quick update along the way....... <33

I know i made a heartbreak. so, if you want to scold or curse me or any character this is your space...... ;) 

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until we meet again ~_~

yours lovingly 

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