18.
chapter eighteen
bad plan

It was a bad plan. A bad, bad (but also a win) plan. To do what, you may ask?

To stop by the cafeteria before heading to the chemistry labs. Why, might be your next question?

So that Gary and the others don't starve testing Ash's blood. Why is it a bad plan must be the ultimate question?

Because I was alone with my soulmate.

"Nay, Serena-chan," Ash began, as if reading my mind. He turned to face me, momentarily stopping his eating frenzy, a frown creasing his features. "You aren't usually this silent. Where's that bubbly self of Serena-chan that I adore at?"

My heart skipped a beat. Nonetheless, I put on a teasing smile and batted my eyebrows, sipping from my iced chai. "Atlantis the moment you rejected what was supposed to be our first kiss."

Ash's frown deepened, and he almost let out what sounded like a low growl. The spoon he was holding fell to the dish with a clank. "I didn't realize it would hurt you so much. I just—" he lowered his voice, leaning closer. "Didn't want my power to increase and put you in a knot."

"I understand," I sighed. But I didn’t. That weird pain that had settled over my bosom since that chilly night still resided there, lingering and inexplicable.

Not that I wanted to explain it.

"I'm sorry."

My smile softened when he ran a hand through his hair, eyes downcast in trapped guilt. "That's okay, Ash. I understand."

I went back to my tray of fries, choosing them as a distraction from the growing ache. But then, he spoke up again. "'I understand' and 'I'm fine' are two of the biggest lies humans utter."

"I'm not fine, then," I countered, voice low.

"Tell me about it."

I looked at him, gauging how willing he was. His eyes were narrowed, tight-lipped, and fists in a ball. He was studying me with an intent expression that had my insides on fire. My gaze lowered to the fries I was munching on. "I grew up listening to Mom talk about her soulmate, and how lucky she was to have him as hers, even if they couldn't last long."

I swallowed hard, a small lump forming in my throat, the unbidden memory of Mom's longing eyes flashing to my mind. It was always there, but after yesterday's confession, rooted deep into my immediate memory.

"And I—the younger me—thought that if I were to ever find my soulmate, I would never let him go. If he did, I would go to any extent to find the right one. In my defence, I had no idea that soothsayers dealt with blood magic until Dawn tested the waters. But that was my conception of the bond: be loyal or you aren't the one."

The fries were growing cold and turning stale. Did I want to go back now?

"And when I found you—completely accidental, puns and all—my childhood dreams took over. I wanted nothing more than to feel what Mom yearned for. And when I wasn't getting it, my teenage self... knew I wasn't worth anyone, the way Dad abandoned Mom. I didn't know, of course, the real reason why he ran out on us. Not until yesterday." My voice dropped to a whisper, breaths turning raspy with my chest aching.

It wasn't the heart-pounding feeling I got when around Ash. Not the heartwarming serenity when in Mom's arms. Rather the pinching loneliness that made my heart throb for comfort.

"Serena." I didn't look up, instead clutching the hem of my skirt tightly. The fabric almost slipped out of my trembling fingers. "Serena, look at me."

Hesitation clouded the better of me. But I was given no choice when I felt the air stir beside me. He was next to me. Kneeling right by my side; his hands on mine, on my lap.

"I despised these soulmate bonds. This blood. It's been sought after for so long. When my dad learned that people were after him, he did something. Something he had no idea of that shooed them away: grew closer to Mom. So close that his blood was enough to repel anyone from entering our household without burning into a pile of ashes."

I felt his hand tremble before he drew in a sharp breath, tightening his grip. "But I didn't believe so. Didn't believe that anything could stop them from hunting us down. Until... I met you, and learned that, perhaps, this was what Dad felt. This is why he keeps going, even if it meant they're in hiding now."

My eyes sought his, heavy with unshed moisture. Was he implying...?

"And then they came after me." He dropped his gaze to our intertwined hands. "Because they couldn't go for my dad, and I was his heir. They waited until I found a soulmate. I despised finding one."

My heart ached when he shut his eyes, fighting back more than just his demons. "Now that I've tasted you, I can't help falling for you. The way Dad for Mom. The way your parents did... Serena."

This time, our gazes met. There was no hesitation in his. I briefly wondered what he saw in mine. Our fingers instinctively reacted, sealing an unspoken agreement. "I cross my heart; I'll always protect you."

Swallowing, I let myself smile through tears. "And I'll always stick by your side."

Ash grinned. But this wasn't like any before. It was genuine. Not habromanic. It was real. Not ephemeral. It was refreshing. Not a façade.

"Right. I'm done with all these emotions flying around," he joked, getting to his feet. I laughed, using the back of my hand to wipe away the few droplets clinging to my eyes.

"Me too."

"Why don't we grab what everyone likes then?" he posed, hands on his waist as he smirked. "A ginger latte for Paul, an espresso for Gar-Bear. Oh, and some berry-fruit parfait for Lillie, just the way she likes."

I got to my feet as well, packing the leftover fries. Perhaps a stray could be helped. "So, you know what everyone likes, eh?" I teased, sending him a smile.

He grinned slyly, rubbing the back of his head. "Yeah, well, everyone except the one person I ought to." I blinked when his gaze bore into mine. Boy, was he impossible.

"Well, I can't write my biography, so you better observe it yourself."

What I did expect was a snort. Maybe a thrash of tantrums or vain protests, even.

But—

What I didn't expect was him to downright stare at me from his towering height. I gulped, reconsidering my words as he smirked deviously. "Your wish is my command, Serena-chan."

Goodness, was I thankful the students of Lumiose High were not hungry that lovely evening.