"Ugh..." Benji says, picking at his salad and sneering as he moves the soggy leaves and a pathetic looking wedge of tomato across his bowl. "Why is the sight of food so exhausting lately?"

"Do you really have to ask?" Lucy says, before she takes a huge bite out of her sandwich and cups her hand underneath her chin as the contents of it almost spill everywhere. "The industry is specially designed to make us hate ourselves and become so obsessed with vanity that we develop eating disorders. It's been studied. Also, you're just eating plain leaves, of course it's gonna be... unappetizing."

Benji groans and rolls his eyes. "No, I mean, like... more than usual."

He shoves his bowl across the table before he takes a glug of coffee. He slams his coffee cup down on the table with an earthen thump before he crosses his arms on the table and sets his head on top of them as Lucy watches him with an eyebrow raised, as if she's trying to keep herself from smiling at his misfortune.

"How many coffees have you had today?" Lucy asks.

"This is my fourth one, why?" He takes another sip.

Lucy sighs and reaches across the table to snatch the cup from his hand. "Dude. You're basically on a liquid diet at this point. You gotta stop."

"But I need it." He leans across the table to grab it back from her, spilling some on the already sticky table.

"That's why you don't wanna eat, you idiot. The caffeine's making you stressed and anxious and it's suppressing your appetite."

"Well, I need to be awake and alert for all of Mia's ridiculous demands..."

Lucy rubs her temples and takes a deep breath through her nose, holding it briefly before exhaling. "You need, like, actual solid food. And hell, while we're at it, why don't you tell me what's really wrong? We still have..." she glances at the clock on the wall of the cafe and squints for a moment before she turns her attention back to him, "seventeen minutes before we have to be back in the office."

Benji examines his nails, which he'd painted black to go with his all-black shirt-dress and pinstripe ankle-length skirt combo and his black eye makeup. He tugs at the black ribbon wrapped around his neck as he chews on his lip and avoids making eye contact with her.

"Is that a new outfit, by the way? It looks sexy. No hetero," Lucy says with a wide grin as she presses her palm agains the top of the table and leans to the side, eyeing him up and down.

"Yeah. Derek got it for me the other day from YSL as an apology gift." Benji sighs loudly.

Lucy opens her mouth to respond before she clamps it closed quickly and nods. "I see."

There's a silence aside from the tap tap tap as Benji drums his fingertips on the table a few more times, his thoughts buzzing around inside his brain like fruit flies on a melon, before he raises his gaze, deciding: fuck it.

"Are you free tonight? Derek and the band want me to come by after work but I really don't wanna go alone and be the only sober person hanging out with a bunch of drunk people."

"Yeah, sure. Why not?"

"Thank you. I owe you one."

"You do," Lucy says with a smirk as she flashes her pearly white teeth. "And you can show your appreciation by telling me what the fuck is going on in that anxious little head of yours."

"I'm not anxious..." Benji mutters, glaring at her.

"Then stop tapping on the table like a million miles a minute."

Benji glances down at his hand and collapses it down flat, ceasing his movements as he clears his throat. She's starting to grate at his nerves. "You're annoying."

"Thank you. Now tell me what's wrong, B."

He sets his mouth into a firm line. "I think my boyfriend hates me."

Lucy blinks, chewing quickly and swallowing her bite practically whole. "Why do you think that?"

He sighs, removing his hands from the table and setting them in his lap as he chews on his lip for a moment. "Oh, I don't know. Doing anything together just seems like a chore lately... like a routine. And I'm starting to get the feeling he's trying to keep himself too busy to pay attention to me or something."

"Too busy, huh..."

"What's that supposed to mean?" He gives her a pointed look, hoping it's intimidating enough in his getup.

"I just think you make a lot of excuses for him. Just break up with him already."

"I can't."

"Why not?"

"I just..." He thinks back to the vastness of their apartment, of its imposing coldness, the walls of ice that had for so long been tempered by warmth. Because I'm terrified of being alone and I don't know what I'm doing wrong. He swallows thickly. "I don't have to explain myself to you. So if you're not gonna give me actual helpful advice, I can go eat with someone else. You know, someone who's not a huge bitch."

"Takes one to know one."

Benji crosses his arms over his chest again as he leans back in his chair and slides his jaw to one side as he narrows his eyes, before he sighs. "I don't wanna lose him. But I'm only gonna say this once." He leans forward and sets his elbows on the table, before he lowers his voice. "Tell me what to do. I..." he lowers his voice to almost a whisper, "need help."

"Whoa." Lucy's eyebrows shoot up and she purses her lips. "You're serious."

"Obviously I'm serious."

"Okay, well..." She taps her lips with her finger as she stares out the window over Benji's shoulder, as Benji simply observes her, vexed. "Ooo, I never knew the day would come when you would need my help, I wasn't ready..."

"Don't get so excited, you sadist..." He rolls his eyes.

She doesn't say anything for a little bit longer, until realization dawns on his face and her lips grow into a grin. "You need to seduce him."

Benji snorts. "Am I not seductive just being my normal self?"

"I mean clearly, whatever you're doing isn't hitting it anymore. But I have an idea..."

"Are you sure this is gonna work? I feel like a hooker," Benji says, wrapping the massive fur coat around his form and holding it closed, his cheeks growing warm as he scans the room within Savant.

"That's the goal. And a very good thing," Lucy says with a grin in the dimness, her arm looped through Benji's as she takes two strides to his one in order to keep up with his long strides as he towers over her in his rainbow Louboutins. She pulls his hand away. "Leave it open, it's not like you're naked under there. But don't get it dirty or anything, it costs $50,000."

Benji's heart hammers in his chest. "Fifty thousand dollars? Are you fucking insane? Derek is gonna spill something on it again and I'm gonna get fired for ruining it and have to pay the damages!"

"Or maybe it was eight thousand..."

"I know you're helping me, but I really hate you right now. Cunt."

Lucy giggles and shrugs as Benji shoves the people in front of them out of the way, before he drops his other hand to his side and lets the jacket fall open. Underneath, a short and tight, strappy dress with a loud pink and black and purple geometric pattern typical of atelier Pucci hugs every inch of his body and accentuates his muscular but shapely physique.

He's not unused to or opposed to wearing dresses, of course, but there's a time and place for them, especially when his whole ensemble costs almost as much as his left kidney, and every movement makes him ultra-cognizant of the fact that he's surrounded by intoxicated people who would happily rub their filthy fingers all over him. Growling, he does his best to avoid touching anyone.

They sit down in the front row, Benji examining the cheap red leather of the chair before gathering his coat carefully around him and slowly lowering himself into his seat.

Benji peers up at the empty stage as the soft piano music floats through the room just quietly enough that it manages to pacify Benji's murderous urges and he crosses his stocking-clad legs, almost relaxing beside Lucy as she undoes her blazer and leans forward so her elbows are on her knees, legs spread as she rubs her hands together expectantly.

"If I get robbed because I look this bougie, I'm never going out with you again," Benji says, crossing his arms over his chest and turning up his nose as he peeks over his shoulder at the other patrons of the establishment. He can't tell if he liked it more the first time he stumbled in.

"No one's gonna rob you... You don't even have anything to steal," Lucy says, clicking her tongue.

He leans over with a smug grin, whispering: "I literally have my phone and my wallet stuffed in a pocket that's attached to one of my garters."

"I thought you were gonna say it's in your ass."

"Fuck you." Benji shoves her with a roll of his eyes as she giggles again. She adjusts her tie and the collar on her starched white shirt. "You know that's only a pocket for one thing."

"Well... that's good to know," she says sarcastically, before she dramatically drapes an arm over Benji's shoulder, just as Benji does the same to her.

"So..." Benji says, dragging his finger along the crinkled material of Lucy's blazer in a circle. "What's the plan?"

"You just have to remind him of what he should be wanting, keep his attention and get his hands on you... And once he's picking up what you're putting down, when you can tell he wants you... take him back to your place. Show him a good time. Ask him to try something a little different, spice things up, if you will."

Benji nods slowly, stroking his chin as he stares off at the candles on one of the tables as it dances around, mesmerizing him for a moment, before he snaps his gaze away. "And what if that doesn't work?"

"You make him jealous."

"So I just... start chatting up a stranger and telling him I like his muscles and feeling up on him and shit."

"Right."

"I guess I can do that."

"But don't be too fruity, okay? You don't wanna scare them away."

"Gee, thanks. Glad to know my fruitiness can be a turnoff for some, I had no idea," Benji says sarcastically as he rolls his eyes.

Lucy pinches his arm and he jumps at the sharp sting.

"Ow!"

"Focus!" she hisses.

"I'm trying! Maybe if you'd stop abusing me, I would be able to..."

"Well, you better, 'cause I'm missing spending the evening with Lake tonight. Make it count."

Benji rolls his eyes and shifts in his seat, grimacing as something presses into the underside of his thigh. He reaches in between his legs, unlatching the little pocket he has attached to his stockings containing his phone and wallet, and sets it on his lap, before he peers down at his sweaty hand. Gaze flitting to Lucy for a second, before it goes back to his hand, he raises his palm and wipes it on the sleeve of her blazer quickly.

"You're nasty," she says, almost leaping away from him.

He shrugs. "Relax, it's just sweat."

"Then wipe it on yourself!"

"Actually, could you put these in your pockets or something, I don't wanna lose them."

"Your jacket has pockets, you know. And they zip."

"Oh... Why is being a girl so hard?" he mutters to himself as he shoves his things into his pockets and zippers them up with a grimace, before he flicks his hair out of his eyes.

Lucy snorts. "We're literally complicit in this shit... Ooo, actually, maybe we can bring dresses with pockets back into style. It's about time."

Just as Benji opens his mouth to respond, someone runs out from behind the curtain on stage, taking their place before the microphone right at center stage.

"Good evening, everybody. We have one hell of a show planned for you tonight, so without further ado... I give you... Derek on the Horizon!"

Applause erupts around them and Benji narrows his eyes as he claps absently, gaze searching the stage as Milo, Coryn, Derek and their new lead singer, who goes simply by 'Mercutio' all stomp across the stage, Derek and Mercutio with their guitars strapped to them, as Derek holds his arms out, like a prophet taking in the smattering of applause.

When Derek takes his spot onstage right in front of him, Benji cranes his neck to catch his eyes, but he's too focused on his guitar for the moment; Benji sighs, deflating against the back of his chair and wringing his hands together in his lap nervously.

"This first song is dedicated to a special someone..." Derek's voice booms steadily through the mic as his gaze searches the crowd for a moment before he finally meets Benji's eye and smiles.

Benji bites back a grin as he sits up a bit straighter, winking at him while the gentle fluttering of wings in Benji's belly gets stronger. Derek is sober, for once, and peering down at him with a sparkle in his eye he hadn't seen in a long time, as the spotlight shines on him and the gentle guitar melody begins to play before it picks up and the drums and bass join it.

He sways gently along to the music, barely registering the lyrics as he closes his eyes for a moment, his pulse slowing as he taps his foot along to the beat. When he opens his eyes again, Derek is still eyeing him in the way he'd rarely seen but still nonetheless recognizes. Benji smirks as he leans his elbow on Lucy's shoulder as she dances in her seat. He spreads his legs, glancing coyly at Derek as he plays with his hair and bites his lip seductively.

The reddening of Derek's cheeks tells Benji all he needs to know and he chuckles as Derek mis-plays a few notes before he catches himself, turning his attention back to his instrument as he presses his lips into a thin line. Benji crosses his legs again, smug, as the song fades out and the crowd gives them another round of applause, this one more enthusiastic than the first.

They play a few more songs before they exit the stage. The announcer returns and introduces a DJ onstage and the dance floor opens up behind them.

Benji wobbles up from his seat and stretches while Lucy laces her arm around him, pulling him toward the floor.

"I think your plan's working," Benji says, as the floor fills with people and electronic music blares from the speakers onstage.

Lucy grins wider than she has the right to as she stands on her toes and sets her hands on his shoulders before her mouth turns down into a grimace and she sets them on his waist instead. "I told you it would."

"A simple 'thanks' would suffice," Benji teases, shaking his hips along to the music as he clutches Lucy's shoulders and his arms brush against people on both sides, making him cringe.

"Well... let's not say anything prematurely..." Lucy juts her chin toward the bar, where Derek is chatting with their friends. "We might be in need of plan B this time around..."

Benji follows her gaze, gritting his teeth when he spots him on the other side of the room; he can't stop the sigh that drops from his lips. He returns his attention to Lucy's face, chewing on the skin on his lip for a moment before he lets his eyes flit across the dance floor. Humming, he clamps his fingers around the rough fabric of Lucy's blazer and into her bony shoulders as he drags her across the wooden dance floor, keeping his pupils trained on Derek the entire time.

He stops them beside a group of guys dancing together, glancing at them from the corner of his eye as they creep closer to the group. Lucy raises an eyebrow before she slides away from him.

"I'll be right back." She winks at Benji before she presses him into one of the guys and darts away with a giggle.

"Oh, shit!"

Benji's foot slips on the polished floor. He tumbles against the guy's chest. He curses to himself. The pounding music conceals a thud. The guy catches him in strong arms.

"Are you okay?"

There are hands wrapped around his biceps as Benji straightens his ankles out and stands up, swallowing as he blinks rapidly to clear his head. He peers at a pair of icy blue eyes, his palms coming up to rest against the guy's broad chest as Benji almost trembles with anxiety.

"Uh..." the guy cups his face and Benji freezes.

"Oh, hell no!" comes a roar from behind him.

Benji whips around just as Derek stomps over and shoves him out of the way. Blinking, Benji reels before he catches his bearings again and shakes his head to clear it.

"Hey, man, relax!" the guy says, holding his hands up in front of him. "I didn't do anything, I swear! I just wanted to make sure he was okay!"

Derek is clutching the front of the guy's shirt, fist raised. The DJ kills the music. Everyone in the establishment holds their breath.

Gritting his teeth, Benji groans as he slips in front of Derek, turning to face him, finally eye to eye, as he curls his hand around Derek's fist gently and lowers it to his side. He's calm when he rests his palm on the hand Derek has balled up in the guy's shirt. "Let go."

"I can't let him touch what's mine--"

"It's okay." Benji bites back a smile, almost tasting blood when Derek's gaze glues itself to his face, expression faltering as he unlatches his fingers from fabric. "He didn't do anything to me, he was just helping me because I lost my balance."

When Derek's hands drop to his sides, Benji takes them wordlessly and pulls him off the dancefloor as Lucy grins and holds her thumbs up behind him. He rolls his eyes as he leads a panting Derek over to a table on the other side of the bar and sits them both down on one of the couches.

"Is everything okay?" Benji asks, bemused, as he strokes Derek's face with the backs of his fingers.

Derek scratches the back of his head for a few seconds before he sighs and rests a hand on Benji's thigh, squeezing it gently. "I don't know... I just... When you're dressed like that--"

"Dressed like what?" Benji's temper flares but he swallows it away.

"Just... you know." He motions up and down at Benji with his hands. "I don't want people taking advantage of you so I get worried when you wear skimpy stuff like that. That's all."

"Oh."

Benji can't stop himself from smiling even though he doesn't know why. He knows he shouldn't excuse this behavior, but, damn... Something about knowing Derek cares makes Benji giggle as he rests his head in his hand and sidles closer to Derek. "I understand."

Derek clears his throat. For once, he doesn't reek of alcohol, instead smelling of sweat and pine. "I-it's... it's a nice outfit, though. A little different."

"Thanks."

"Look... I'm sorry I've been so busy lately... I really should take more time to remind you of how amazing you are," Derek says gently.

Benji's heart swells, and he almost believes Derek's words. His stomach drops even as he smiles and shoves away his doubts behind the fortified wall of his mind. He can't stop his eyes from sparkling as he peers up at him and wraps his fingers around Derek's wrist before he moves the hand he'd set on his thigh a little higher up on his leg. "It's okay. Really."

"No, it's not," Derek says, brushing away Benji's fringe almost... lovingly? He tips Benji's chin up so their eyes meet. "I love you, Benji."

"Oh..." Benji sighs, almost swooning as his chest threatens to burst out from behind his ribs. "I love you, too."

Derek smiles as he leans down, capturing Benji's lips in his own as he grips him closer to him by the shoulder, his hold ironclad, possessive, and Benji doesn't even care if Derek doesn't even mean it. Something aches within him as he drifts closer to Derek against his own will, just before Derek pulls away and Benji follows him unconsciously by the lip for one more kiss.

"Do you wanna get out of here?" Benji mumbles, eyes still closed.

"Yeah."

They spend the entirety of the duration of their wait for a chauffeur outside in the cold. Benji's jacket hangs off him like a shed exoskeleton but the cold doesn't reach him. His exposed back scratches and sears against the side of a building as Derek pins him down against it, their lips remaining connected even when their car arrives and they stumble inside. They just barely close the partition before Derek shoves Benji back onto the leather seat with a loud grunt. But Benji doesn't even care, because he can't remember the last time Derek had wanted him this badly.

When they get back to their apartment building, hobbling into the lift and smashing the buttons mindlessly, Benji has Derek shoved up against the wall as Derek slips his hand into his panties just as the elevator dings.

A trail of clothes starting at the front door and ending at the doorway to their bedroom lies forgotten as Benji throws Derek down to the bed and they kiss the life out of each other, too consumed with each other's tongues and bodies to pay any attention to the time.

Benji grins, euphoric, as he pins Derek down and rides him, gasping and whining when he actually cums for once, his hands wrapped around Derek's neck before he spits in his mouth and leans down to kiss Derek again, his eyebrows furrowed in pleasure as Derek finishes inside him with a groan.

And when Derek cradles him to his chest, holding him like he's the most precious treasure, Benji almost falls asleep listening to his heartbeat before Derek's voice interrupts his thoughts.

"I love you so much, Benji," Derek says quietly, brushing his hair as he tips Benji's head to the side so they face each other. "I wanna take you out tomorrow. Like, for a real date. Just the two of us. No friends or bandmates. And it'll be at a fancy place, too."

Covering his mouth in the back of his hand, Benji yawns but nods nonetheless, every inch of him overcome with warmth. "Love you, too, babe. That sounds amazing. It's been ages since we've done anything like that."

"Yeah..." Derek squeezes his shoulder and nuzzles his face into his hair, and Benji sighs as he wraps his arm around his waist and pulls him closer, hovering on the edge of sleep. "Night."

"Mm... night," Benji mumbles, as if the words are lone stragglers from his lips, just before he slips into a peaceful sleep.

The next day, Benji whistles happily as he enters the office, pausing and raising an eyebrow as he stands in the doorway before Victor, peering down at him in confusion. His hands are buried in the pockets of his soft grey wool coat.

"What're you doing here so early?"

Victor glances up from his screen. His usual sweater aesthetic is nowhere to be found. Instead, he's clad in a deep plum blazer accented with gilded cufflinks, a crisp, light paisley shirt underneath. The gold tie somehow pulls the outfit together and doesn't look as tacky as it could on anyone else. Benji purses his lips, impressed, but he won't tell him any of that.

"You seem... different. What're you so happy about? You're scaring me," Victor counters, before returning his attention to the screen.

"Mind your business."

Benji walks over to the closet, his eyes never leaving Victor's form as he slips out of his jacket and hangs it up before he closes the door.

He's wearing a loose turtleneck--white, of the softest cashmere--tucked into a pair of high-waisted grey wide-legged trousers, along with a pair of navy suede boots with a slight heel. A matching belt cinches at his waist elegantly, effortlessly, looking simple and classy. He didn't even bother to accessorize today, opting instead for an unadorned aesthetic.

Victor fidgets, oblivious, tugging at the collar of his shirt as he rolls his shoulders uncomfortably, and Benji imagines he's unused to the sensation of that particular fabric against his skin. Benji shakes his head as he walks over to his own desk.

"Well... it's weird. You haven't roasted me for my outfit or bullied me for doing something wrong."

Rolling his eyes, Benji leans against the wardrobe and lets his eyes rove down to Victor's boot-clad feed, sighing. "Are you destitute? You should buy yourself more than one pair of shoes and not just wear the hand-me-downs Rahim gave you."

"There we go. This feels right," Victor says with a tinge of a laugh in his voice.

There's a silence between them for a moment as Benji runs his fingers through his silky tresses. He hadn't bothered to style it this morning, drawn more to the fluffiness of his own hair without product in it instead.

"Hey, are you single?" Benji asks, surprising himself.

Victor snorts. "No, why? Are you interested?"

Benji scoffs dramatically. How the hell is he not single? "God, no. In your dreams, Salazar. It's just weird for someone who's not single to be in the office so early."

"What's your excuse?"

He thinks back to last night and then to earlier that morning, when he'd gotten up from bed with a lazy smile, before he leaned down to kiss Derek's cheek as he slept soundly, placidly, buried within a nest of covers and sheets. Something had stirred within Benji, something dull yet sharp, persistent; just a little sleep deprivation, he'd reasoned.

"Oh, please. This is late for me."

"Ah... I see." Victor shrugs, playing with his tie anxiously as he taps his fingertips on the surface of the desk.

There's another pause between them as Benji picks up a stack of magazines from his desk and brings them into Mia's office, fanning them out on her desk.

"Did your girlfriend pick that outfit out?" Benji asks, holding back a laugh as he exits Mia's office again.

Victor runs a hand through his hair as his Adam's apple bobs and he examines the front of his jacket. "Huh? Is something wrong with it?"

Benji giggles maliciously. "No comment."

"Okay..." Victor's face twists as he plays with a pencil, almost snapping it in half between his fingers. He takes a deep breath, holding it, before exhaling. "Also, boyfriend."

"What?"

"I have a boyfriend. I'm gay."

Raising an eyebrow and looking Victor up and down one more time, Benji's taken aback. "Really?"

"Why would I lie about that? I just love the possibility of being harassed on the street."

"No, I just... you seem so... painfully straight."

Victor chuckles, stretching his legs out underneath the desk. "You should see my boyfriend."

"Try me."

"Here." Victor pulls his phone out of his pocket and holds the screen up to Benji's face. The wallpaper is an image of Victor and a man with curly dark hair who's slightly taller than him, where they stand, arm-in-arm, in front of some beautiful mountain scenery.

Benji snatches the phone from him and peers down at it. "Oh. He's... Okay, I see what you mean--" Benji frowns as a notification pops up on the screen that reads 'Have a fun day with Satan 🤪'. He sets the phone down on Victor's desk. "Who's 'Satan'?"

Victor's fingers freeze atop the keyboard and his eyes go wide. "Uhh..."

"It's Mia, isn't it? I've seen her called worse..." Benji says with a mirthful laugh.

Smacking his hand atop his phone and dragging it across the desk with a loud squeak, Victor doesn't respond. He simply gives him a tight-lipped smile.

"Nice chat," Benji says, narrowing his eyes.

"Goooooood mooooorning, boys!" Rahim says loudly as he throws the glass door open and enters, clad in a deep forest green coat that brushes his ankles. He peels it off and puts it away before he turns to Benji.

"Ohhh... Ugh, Benji, you really let yourself go today. You look so... gauche. Are you okay?" Rahim says, feeling Benji's forehead with the back of his hand as he takes a step away from him.

Benji smacks his hand away. "Yeah, actually. I'm feeling perfectly well today. Or I was, until you showed up and started irritating me."

"Okay, fine. I'm sorry. It's just... weird seeing you in suede. And cashmere. And..." he gasps, leaning in closer to Benji so their noses almost brush. "Is that... white eyeliner?"

"Yeah, so?"

Rahim's face twists again. "You look all--"

"--Vera, I had a look at those dresses you sent over last night and I think they would be much better with less lace, it's so last season," Mia says into her phone as she enters the office, her heels clicking against the floor in a way that would normally be ominous, but something about it is therapeutic for Benji today. "Feathers are in these days. Try something with feathers and send them back to me--" She pauses, looking Benji up and down quickly before a smile breaks across her lips.

Benji eyes Rahim, smug, as Rahim rolls his eyes before he retreats to his desk.

"Yes, you can call my assistant to arrange the details." And when Mia stops in front of Victor, she does a double take before she drops her gigantic black Hermès tote and white jacket on top of Victor's desk with a thump and disappears into her office.

The rest of the day passes surprisingly smoothly aside from the occasional fuck-up from Victor, but Benji can't even find it in him to scold him too harshly, his attention more focused on sending flirty texts to Derek instead. Somehow, though, this unnerves Victor even more than his usual wit, which amuses Benji more than it should.

He hums along to some upbeat guitar music as he returns to his apartment, dancing in the elevator as he smiles at himself in the mirror. When he arrives on his floor, he dashes to his door and unlocks it hastily before he slips inside.

"Babe?" Benji calls as he kicks off his shoes, glancing around the apartment as he shuffles inside. It's cleaner than it's been in weeks, the dark hardwood spotless where papers and dust and laundry used to reside. The noise of running water greets him. "I'm so curious to see what you have planned for us later on."

"Hm? Oh, hey, babe," Derek says nonchalantly from the kitchen sink as he rinses a glass and sets it on the drying rack beside him before he shuts off the water and grabs the rag draped over the handle of one of the kitchen cabinets. "Uh... how was your day?"

Benji grins as he watches Derek hang the rag back up again before he creeps closer to him, wrapping his arms around his back and pressing a kiss to the back of Derek's neck. Derek tenses under his touch, scratching at his arm for a moment before he turns around in his embrace.

"My day was all right. Pretty chill, surprisingly. But, damn... it's so clean in here."

"Uh, yeah... I figured it would be good to take care of the mess, since you're always so good about cleaning up. It's kinda unfair. For you to do it all, I mean." Derek kisses Benji's hair before he ruffles it slightly as Benji nuzzles against his neck affectionately, his heart fluttering in his chest.

"Aww, thank you. You're so thoughtful."

"No problem," Derek says stiffly. He pulls away from Benji and cups his cheek, peering into his eyes. "Listen, I know I said I would take you out tonight, but... I didn't sleep last night and I'm actually pretty tired. Can we have a raincheck?"

Benji's face falls but he nods, pressing his lips together into a line. "Yeah. Yeah, no problem at all. I appreciate the thought, though." He forces a smile.

"You're the best." Derek kisses him quickly before he cranes his face up to press a soft kiss to Benji's forehead, too.

"Thanks..." Benji almost whispers, letting his arms slough off Derek's back. "I don't mind just hanging out. Lemme just wash up and maybe we can watch something together?" He curses himself for the hopeful lilt that engulfs his voice; he clears his throat.

Derek nods curtly. "Yeah, sure. Why not?"

The smile that curls Benji's lip this time is easier, and so he kisses Derek's cheek chastely before he turns away, padding down the corridor to their bedroom. He sighs, shaking his head as he runs a hand through his hair.

A small light beckons him in the darkness and Benji squints as he approaches, the screen of Derek's phone glowing. He glances over his shoulder before he leans over.

"From: Isaac"

Isaac? Who the fuck is Isaac?

Bile rises in Benji's throat and he regrets the amount of coffee he'd drank that day. He grabs the phone and brings it to his face.

"Hey babe I think I may have left my charger at your place. Can you bring it by tomorrow? I guess you really wore me out huh 😉"

Benji's lip twitches as his heart hammers as if it's trying to pump out the entire sea and he takes a deep, shaky breath as he carefully places the phone down just where he'd found it. He blinks several times, biting his lip, as the room spins around him and his spirit threatens to detach itself from his corporeal form.

"B-babe?" Benji calls out into the kitchen. "I'm... I'm gonna get ready for bed." He pauses, taking another breath, as he tries his hardest to still his voice. "Night."

"Night," Derek calls in return.

Lip quivering, Benji slips into the ensuite, locking the door behind him, before he throws his back against the door and slides down to the floor, clamping his hand over his mouth as his tears run down his arm like rivulets of broken promises, too many for him to count.

When he's done, he washes his face and puts on the flannels that constrict his every cell, burning where they touch. He curls up in a ball when he slips under the covers and cries some more, stilling shortly after as Derek's feet pitter-patter against the floor along with the sharp, crackling of his scratching, and he lies down beside him, a dead weight, and Benji knows he's rolling over to face the opposite wall, where the cold air seeps off it and beneath his flesh, into his bones.

Benji shivers, overcome with numbness and thankful for once that Derek doesn't even try to touch him. He wipes his eyes with the heels of his hands and stares at the thick curtains in the darkness as he prays for sleep to claim him.

It doesn't.