"The moment I saw you
My soul begged for me
to make you mine."

~~Rahul

****************

~~Mason~~

Shit. What the hell was I thinking? Why did I say I would do this?! I can't do this!

My mental freak out had morphed into a physical manifestation as I paced around the living room of Kas's house. The man himself was sprawled lazily on the couch, his long legs stretched out in front of him and one foot propped on the coffee table. He was watching me with clear amusement, brown eyes following me around the room as he took another drag from the joint pinched between the thumb and index finger on his right hand.

"I'm glad one of us finds this funny," I complained in exasperation. "Why didn't you stop me?"

Kas laughed. "Why would I do that? This is too entertaining."

"You're supposed to be my friend." I had intended to sound angry, but it came out more whiny than I would have liked. I scrubbed a hand over my face and looked at him in defeat. "Why didn't you speak up, say something to bring me to my senses? I shouldn't have said I would do it."

"Did you want to have that discussion in front of QP?" Kas asked, raising an inquisitive brow. I narrowed my eyes despite the heat that rose to my cheeks. "Yeah, I didn't think so, but I don't think she would have cared anyway."

QP, which stood for 'Queen Pin', was what Kas often called Rory who was his best friend, and up until a few months ago, our boss. Most people would consider us criminals, and I guess in most dictionaries we probably were, however I preferred the term 'justice vigilantes'. To the majority of the world, Rory was sweet and kind hearted, but those of us that had been a part of the Southside Crew, we had come to know a very different side of her.

"I'm not like you, Kas," I reminded him impatiently. "My area of expertise does not include ninja skills. Unlike you, I'm not a walking tank!"

"Did you just call me a Ninja Turtle?" Kas asked, attempting to appear offended but failed when he couldn't suppress his smile. "Relax, Mase. Nik won't attack you. If Rory thought her little sister wouldn't be safe with you, I can promise that she would have denied your offer to begin with."

I resumed my pacing, chewing anxiously on the tip of my thumb. The main threat against the Rivers sister had been dealt with months ago, but that wasn't the only potential problem. Rory still had enemies even if she had disbanded her crew and handed her power off to someone else. However, she wasn't the only one of us who had a target on their back.

"Why? Because I'm just a harmless kid?" I asked in annoyance.

"You're anything but harmless," Kas replied, exhaling a cloud of smoke, the lightly acrid scent filling the room. "Look, if you really don't want to give Nik a ride from the train station, I'm sure QP will find someone else or have Benjamin send one of his guys."

My first thought was of Alex, a made man of the Crowe Family Mafia and known playboy. I could easily picture him flirting unabashedly with Anika, using his good looks and bad boy charm to worm his way into her bed. Clenching my fists at my sides, I shook my head.

"No, I'll do it." I sounded more confident than I felt. Moments later, the blood drained from my face and I looked at Kas with wide eyes. "How much does she know about... everything?"

It was Kas's turn to look uncertain and I watched with growing panic as he shifted uncomfortably on the couch. The longer he took to answer, the faster my heart began to race and I began to question my sanity all over again. It was bad enough I had only met the girl once and even then it wasn't an introduction. I just happened to be with Kas when he picked Rory up for work one morning and the twins were leaving at the same time.

"Ugh, this is going to be awkward as fuck," I groaned, flopping down beside Kas with a hand resting on my stomach. I was suddenly feeling a bit queasy. "Maybe I should just change the plans."

Kas looked at me for a moment, long enough to make me squirm uncomfortably under his gaze. When he spoke, he sounded curious as he tossed the joint into a nearby ashtray.

"She's the reason you wanted to learn to fight, isn't she?"

"What?" I asked, snapping my head towards him. "What are you talking about?"

Kas smirked and gave me a knowing look. "When everything went down back in the fall, you wanted to protect yourself other than just with a gun, remember?"

"Yeah?"

"Before, you never complained about someone being with you all the time or not being allowed out of The Box alone," Kas continued patiently, "at least not until Rory made her orders to protect the girls at all cost."

I didn't say anything, simply listening as I looked down at my hands, my fingers twisting nervously in my lap.

"It was Anika, wasn't it?" Kas pressed. "Not only did you want to have a chance to be alone with her without a chaperone, but you wanted to be able to protect her, too. Learning to fight wasn't for your benefit."

Again, I didn't say anything which only seemed to confirm things for Kas. Even if I had tried to deny it, he wouldn't have believed me but what was the point when we both knew he was right? Being who I was and doing the things that I did, danger would follow me, but being Rory's sister put Anika in the potential line of fire as well.

The day I had glimpsed her from Kas's car, I thought she was beautiful. She may look just like her twin, Andi, but Anika was completely and wholly unique in every way that I could see. When the man that had killed their parents resurfaced after six years, Rory had put me in charge of Anika's security. She was hundreds of miles away, but we needed to know she was safe nonetheless.

Normally, keeping a constant eye on someone by whatever means necessary wouldn't have bothered me in the least. I enjoyed my work, but keeping track of every move Anika made left me feeling guilty for the first time in my life. It was my job, and at the time I kept telling myself that I was just following the orders handed down from my boss. However, at the back of my mind, a sick part of me enjoyed being able to get to know her in some way, even if she had no idea I existed, much less watching.

"You didn't answer my question, Kas," I pointed out quietly, keeping my eyes downcast. "How much does Anika know?"

Kas shrugged. "I honestly have no idea. Andi's told me that Nik has her suspicions but I'm not sure even Andi knows for certain."

"And it's not like we can come out and ask her," I muttered, dropping my head against the back of the couch and staring up at the ceiling. "So, I'm just some guy her sister knows?"

"Rory just said you were a friend." Kas ran a hand through his hair and sighed. "It'll be fine. Nik is a nice girl, so just pick her up and bring her over here. Andi and B will be home by the time you get back."

I nodded and checked the time on my phone, briefly thinking how amazing it was that Kas was in a polyamorous relationship with our boss's sister and the guy she had been friends with for years. He was happy though and seemed to be thriving despite the struggles the three of them had previously endured. I hadn't ever brought it up, mostly because I had no idea how to talk to someone about things like that, but also because I wasn't sure it was my business.

"Wish me luck," I said, a bit unenthusiastic as I stood and pulled the keys from my back pocket.

"I think you'll survive," Kas laughed.

Yeah, if I don't throw up and make myself run into a tree or something., I thought as I climbed behind the wheel of my white Nissan GT-R. It was just after nine at night, but I was pretty sure I wouldn't survive long enough to turn back into a pumpkin. Humiliation would most likely do me in before I got the chance.

●●●●

The train station wasn't as busy as I thought it would be, but I guess I shouldn't have been surprised at such a late hour of the night. There were a couple of taxis parked near the front and a handful of other vehicles, but otherwise the lot was practically vacant. An older man with gray hair sat waiting on a metal bench beside a bus stop sign, but his head was drooped and slowly rose and fell with each breath he took. How someone could fall asleep in such an open place was beyond my comprehension.

As I waited for the train to arrive, I turned the radio up and absently drummed my fingers on the steering wheel while watching the empty tracks. Repeatedly, I found myself checking the time and huffing out a frustrated breath. Part of me wanted to put the car in reverse and leave while I still could, while the other half wished the train would hurry up. My anxiety had my heart pounding in my chest and my hands trembling, my stomach twisting into knots.

"Damn, get a grip, Mason," I growled to myself, running a shaking hand through my hair. "You've done much more difficult tasks than giving a girl a ride home."

But had I? After saying it out loud, I wasn't sure I actually had. Computers, coding, scripts, electronics, those were things I knew, but not people. No, I didn't know how to deal with people, especially women. They were completely foreign to me and I had no clue how to act or speak without sounding like a complete moron. The only female I had ever been able to interact with was Rory but she wasn't even close to the average woman.

Groaning in frustration, too anxious to remain locked inside the car any longer, I pulled out my sleek, two tone 9mm Kimber pistol and double checked the magazine and chamber. Once satisfied, I climbed from the car and slipped it back into the holster hidden beneath my jacket. Just because we weren't aware of an imminent threat, that didn't mean we could let our guards down.

I had only taken a few steps down the sidewalk when the low hum of an approaching train met my ears. Moments later the large machine came into view, its light illuminating the tracks a few blocks away. Originally, I had planned to wait inside the building for Anika, but the sight of the train had my palms sweating and my chest growing tight. There was no way I could go in that place in my condition so I opted for the cool night air which also gave me time to pull myself together. If she saw me pale, sweaty, and clearly nervous, she would probably think I was an ax murderer or something.

By the time I had calmed myself down and back into a mostly normal state of being, the train had stopped and a few people had already exited the building. Eyeing the doors, I leaned against the hood of my car as casually as I could and waited, watching for the girl I had never met before. When the moonlight caught the pale strands of her hair, my heart skipped a beat and my body grew tense. I told my legs to move or my arm to wave and let her know where I was, but I was momentarily frozen in place. All I could do was watch, at least until her head turned towards me and there was no denying that she was looking at me.

"Don't freak out," I mumbled under my breath. "Don't freak out. Don't freak out."

Fuck, I'm pathetic.

It didn't take long for Anika to stop a few feet away, one hand clutching the strap of her messenger bag while the other gripped the handle of a white duffel bag. I opened my mouth to say something but she beat me to it.

"Are you Mason?" she asked nervously, biting her bottom lip and shifting her weight on her feet.

"Uh, yeah," I somehow managed, quickly straightening away from the car. "Yeah, I'm, uh, I'm Mason. Or, uh, Mase, whatever you want."

I mentally facepalmed at my nervous stammering and then immediately almost died when Anika smiled in response. She wasn't laughing at me or humoring my pathetic social abilities. No, this was small, yet despite the exhaustion I could clearly see on her face, this smile was warm and relieved. I wasn't sure what she was relieved about other than not talking to a completely random stranger, but I wasn't going to complain either.

"Well then, Mase, I guess you can call me 'Nik' if you want," she replied before nodding her head towards the car. "Is this yours?"

"Oh, yeah, shit, sorry," I apologized, continuing to trip over my words. "Here, let me take your bag."

"Oh, uh, thanks."

Nik seemed as uncertain as I felt but she allowed me to take her duffel bag without looking uncomfortable so I felt that was a good sign. Rounding the car, I opened the passenger side door, and waited for her to get in but she paused, with only one foot inside, and looked up at me.

"You don't have to treat me like a princess or anything just because you know my sister," she told me in a low but sincere voice. "I don't need special treatment."

"I'm not doing it because of her," I found myself saying without a hint of hesitation or nerves. Her blue eyes widened a fraction but before she could respond or before I made a fool of myself, I gestured to the seat beside her. "Come on, let's get you home. It's a couple hours away and you need to get some rest."

Anika frowned at my choice of words but I didn't give her a chance to question it before I closed the door. I was thankful that she didn't question me after I joined her inside my car, the enclosed space suddenly seeming much smaller than it usually did. Doing my best to hide my shaking hands and drive us back home, I couldn't ignore the close proximity of our bodies every time I shifted gears. I wracked my brain for something to say to break the silence but she beat me to it once again.

"This is a really nice car," she mumbled sleepily, "and I'm sorry but I'm going to sleep in it."

I couldn't help but smile. "It's okay. Get some rest and I'll wake you up when we get to Andi's."

Anika hummed in response and was so quiet afterwards that I thought she had gone to sleep. Taking a chance, I looked over at her as we drove beneath a street lamp. Her elbow was propped against the car door with her hand supporting her head, and blonde hair falling across her face. My fingers itched to brush away the strands that hid her face but I refrained and focused my attention back on the road. When her quiet, sleep slurred voice filled the air a few minutes later, I involuntarily jumped in my seat from the unexpected sound.

"I'm sorry you're out so late," she mumbled softly, "but thank you for coming to get me, Mason."

"Uh, you're welcome," I replied, clearing my throat when my voice cracked. "I don't mind."

She mumbled something incoherent but I was pretty sure not even she knew what she said as she finally drifted off to sleep. Most people might have been disappointed in such a situation but I wasn't. Maybe it was odd, but I didn't feel as nervous after a while just being near her and hoped that the feeling would remain the next time we saw each other. If I couldn't manage to function like a normal human being, there was no way she would even want to be my friend, which meant the chances of anything more would be nonexistent.

●●●●

"How long has she been asleep?" Kas whispered when he opened the front door of his house.

Anika was cradled in my arms and I allowed myself a brief moment of smugness at being able to do so but then immediately felt like a creep.

"Pretty much the entire ride back," I replied, carefully following him up the stairs.

It was well past midnight, but Kas had waited up for us to make it back which I was grateful for. I had a key but it would have been extremely difficult to let us inside without waking her. We finished the short trek to the guest room in silence, and Kas turned on a bedside lamp and carefully placed her bags on top of the dresser before retreating down the hall without a word.

After gently placing Anika on the full sized bed, I hesitated for a second before tugging off her shoes and pulling the comforter over her. She whimpered in her sleep, her face looking pained as she curled on her side and pulled the blanket tighter around her. Squatting beside the bed, I gave in to the desire to move her hair away from her face.

"You're safe, Nik," I whispered inches from her face, hoping to soothe away the bad dream she was clearly having. "Everything is okay now, just get some sleep."

The crease between her eyebrows slowly smoothed itself out and she soon looked relaxed once again. Sighing, I fought the urge to kiss her temple, knowing it would be going too far for a socially inept guy like me.

This is going to be a long week.