*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧
( FOREVER )
FIVE━━ The good, the bad, and the ugly
ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ 恋人┊͙✧˖*°࿐(🚙🚦🏘)

( PRESENT DAY ━ OCTOBER 18th, 2023 )

PETER'S REVELATION SHOULDN'T HAVE shocked Briar as much as it did, but never in a million years would she have thought that Peter would finally listen to her hours of anxious rambling. And now here she was, five years later, discovering that Peter Parker had finally taken a step back from the whole superhero life and said goodbye to his secret identity Spider-Man.

When Briar found out about Peter's double life in 2016, she was skeptical. She gradually became more and more supportive of him, but she couldn't seem to ever shake away the doubts and fear that played in the back of her head. Of course she was proud of Peter for using his powers responsibly to help keep his community safe. How could anyone be upset about that? She would never try to control Peter or force him into completely giving up something he loved, it was just the worry about not knowing if her boyfriend would make it back home safely one day that made her concerned.

Briar tried her hardest to keep her face expressionless as she processed Peter's revelation. "You and May were never really fond of me fighting crime and putting myself in danger every night." Peter continued to clarify, "Everything changed so fast after you both disappeared.. I was spiraling. I fell into a depression, and it just didn't feel right continuing to do something that used to keep you both awake at night."

These were words that Briar had only dreamed of Peter admitting aloud, but now that he has, it didn't give her the joy she imagined it would. She was relieved, but everything about it felt somber. "I felt guilty for abandoning the city when I had the power to continue protecting them, but the guilt I felt for not being able to save you all overpowered it."

Briar frowned and reached a hand out to place it on top of his own. "Peter, you can't be blaming yourself for any of this. It's not your fault, it never was."

"Maybe so." he replied, shifting his eyes down to the fabric of the couch and sighed. It didn't seem like he believed that he had nothing to do with the Snap, at least not fully. The guilt was still there. "Still, it felt like I was dishonoring you both." Briar squeezed Peter's hand reassuringly and Peter apprehensively glanced back up to her face.

"But do you miss it? It sounds like you made the decision to stop being Spider-Man because of me and May." Briar pursed her lips and she felt Peter's hand turn from under hers and grasp it comfortingly. "And as relieved as I am about you deciding to stop putting yourself in danger, if the only reason you quit was because of us then—"

"I became Spider-Man after Ben passed away because I know deep down I could've saved him, but I was too late." Peter sighed, his grip tightening slightly on Briar's hand as his body tensed. "I went on patrols every night just to make sure there weren't ever any potential threats to the safety of you and May—and even Ned and MJ—it felt like my responsibility. And in the end, when the time came and your lives were threatened, I failed. After that, I didn't even want to get near the suit. I have two, one is in the back of my closet and the other, the one I was wearing on that day is kept at Tony and Pep's house."

Peter's attempt at reassuring Briar provided her with little to no comfort, not only was he alone during the Blip, but he was also battling with depression, grief, and a whole identity crisis. Briar would always be the first to say Peter Parker deserved the world, and he did. In fact, he deserved the entire universe, the whole galaxy. But after every battle that has been thrown at him, did the world really deserve him?

Definitely not.

Peter poked her arm with his outstretched finger, effectively snapping Briar out of her racing thoughts. His face wasn't solemn or regretful, but at peace with his choice. Content. "Hey, don't get all quiet on me. You should be stoked, May was when I told her! And you weren't so thrilled about me being Spider-Man when you first found out, right?" he paused and waited for Briar to shrug and nod sheepishly, "This is what you've always wished I'd do, and now I have—on my own terms, in some way."

It was true. Peter had chosen quite possibly the worst, most terrible moment to reveal his alter ego to Briar. To be fair, he originally had a different idea. He had it all planned out and he definitely hadn't planned to tell her at the time or in the way he did, but duty calls.

━━
( 7 YEARS AGO ━ SEPTEMBER 24th, 2016 )

"You lied to me." Briar spoke up after Peter carefully entered his bedroom through the window in his torn up sweatsuit. Peter felt his entire body freeze, panic rapidly seeping into his veins and curling around his heart like thorn vine. It was way past midnight, and Briar was currently sitting frustratedly on the edge of Peter's bed. Tonight—homecoming night—was supposed to be fun, a night to remember fondly. Instead, Briar was sitting uncomfortably on Peter's bed, still in her light pink homecoming dress.

Peter had betrayed her trust, and telling by his shocked and regretful expression, every battle lost and every defeat Peter had before this moment amounted to nothing compared to this. If there was anything that Briar valued most in their relationship, it was trust. Peter knew this. Despite everything, the fact that Peter felt like he couldn't be honest and communicate with Briar was what hurt the most. The fact that he'd lied to her on multiple occasions made it feel hard for Briar to breathe.

Peter was staring at her anxiously with shaking hands as he clutched onto his mask, his fists clenching and turning his knuckles pale and white under the tarnished homemade sweatsuit that adorned his body. His lip quivered as she averted her gaze and tried to remain stoic. It wasn't working too well though, considering Peter could clearly make out the disappointment in her eyes. She had stopped crying slightly, but her eyes still shone with betrayal and pain, a look Peter would never be able to forget.

He caused that pain.

"I promise I can explain." Peter assured, remaining in his place. Briar tilted her head and scoffed bitterly. "I was planning on telling you.. or something, eventually, I swear!"

"Or something?" Briar placed her hands down against the fabric of Peter's bedsheets as she finally made eye contact with him. She let out a short laugh that resembled a scoff, "Why couldn't you tell me, do you not trust me?"

He held his hands out in front of himself and shook them rapidly towards Briar. "No, god—no! I do, I do trust you. But Briar, I didn't want to put you in danger."

Briar stared at him skeptically, and without hesitation she scoffed, "Ned knows, doesn't he?" Of course he did. He'd known this entire time. After Peter had ditched her on the dance floor, Briar sat defeatedly with her two friends moping with confusion until she saw Ned not so subtly sneaking away from the crowd and into the hallway.

Knowing that her boyfriend and his best friend were up to no good, Briar followed Ned—with Michelle and Harry on her trail—and the path of Peter's homecoming attire, only to find Spider-Man in a downgraded suit and Ned holding a web-shooter. Briar was a smart girl, so in a matter of seconds she connected the dots.

Peter's outstretched arms fell defeatedly to his sides, hanging limply as he failed to speak. Briar only shook her head. "So, is everything you're saying complete bullshit, or are you suddenly okay with putting your best friend in harm's way?" Peter goes on to explain to Briar how Ned accidentally found out he was Spider-Man weeks ago. She was barely listening to his incessant rambling, instead choosing to focus on the tears in his sweatsuit and the deep scars on his cheekbone.

"Why couldn't you have told me sooner?" Briar murmured, "Why couldn't you have just talked to me! Communicate, Peter."

Peter could see the sadness in his girlfriend's eyes slowly mix with anger as he stood there stiffly, unable to answer for himself. He glanced down at the rips in his sweatsuit, his eyes closing in on the visible wounds on his arms and hands. Surely they'd be healed completely in a week or so, the deeper wounds would take longer to heal—even with the super-healing, but that didn't mean he wasn't in pain.

In the time Peter was zoning in on his injuries, Briar stood up from Peter's bottom bunk and flattened out her dress. Rolling her eyes, she let out a low whistle and gestured that she'd be back shortly. Moving swiftly, Peter rushed to rip the torn fabric from his body and change into the closest pair of pajama pants he could find.

Coming back into the room moments after, Briar almost dropped the entire first aid kit as her eyes landed on the large wound that cut from Peter's chest down to the middle of his stomach. She didn't even have enough time to become flustered by the sight of her boyfriend shirtless. "You didn't tell me you were bleeding out, you ass!" she rushed to Peter's side and forced him to lay down on the floor, not wanting to get his bedsheets stained with blood, inevitably causing more problems. "Tell me how this happened."

"The Vulture dropped me from fifty feet in the air onto Coney Island Beach and then sliced me with his wings." Peter mustered out while Briar pulled out the gauze and hydrogen peroxide from the kit. Her hands froze and she glared at Peter incredulously.

"Are you out of your mind?" Briar nearly shouted, repeatedly pressing her fingers to her temple as Peter gestured outwardly, not knowing how to respond.

"I was attacked!" Peter raised his voice to match his girlfriend's. Letting out a shaky huff, Briar quickly poured the disinfectant onto the cotton and pressed it onto Peter's wound. He hissed loudly, letting out a string of curses that made Briar mumble a quiet apology, but continued dabbing at Peter's skin.

His hand gripped Briar's leg and the fabric of her pretty pink homecoming dress, trying his hardest to control his strength. "You're so stupid." Briar whispered, her eyes glassy and stuck on the wound. She grimaced at the now pale red piece of gauze and set it aside.

"I know." Peter replied lazily, not enjoying the feeling of cold air against his scar. He kept his left hand on her leg and reached to touch her cheek with the other. Her makeup was still beautiful, the night had been ruined, and yet she still looked perfect. "I'm sorry for ruining our homecoming."

Briar scoffed and stopped dabbing at his cut. "That's not what I'm upset about, Peter. I don't care about homecoming anymore. I'm upset that you're.. you're that stupid, stupid masked guy that's all been all over the news."

"You say that like it's the worst thing you could've found out about." Peter stated, observing Briar's face closely.

"Well, as someone who's quite literally grown up disliking superheroes, watch them destroy the city, and leave the working class to clean up their messes," Briar fumed and let her hand go limp against Peter's toned stomach, "It's hard to fathom that I've fallen in love with one."

"You—You're in love with me?" Peter's eyes widened and he attempted to lift himself off the floor, realizing it was a bad idea as he had sat up halfway and made the scar on his stomach rip a bit at the sides. He immediately lowered his back onto the floor again, but the expression on his face was permanent. "You love me?"

"Were you not listening to anything I was saying prior to that? That's not the point, Peter!" The anger Peter saw mixed with sadness moments earlier were more prominent now, and although Peter would never want to make his girlfriend mad, it was much better than seeing her sad. "The point is, you're sitting here, bleeding out, and yet you're acting like you're fine, as if it's a normal occurrence."

Peter furrowed his eyebrows. She brushed off the fact that she'd said she loved him for the very first time so quickly. Did she not mean it? Was she ashamed now to admit it because he was just Peter? Or because now she saw him in a negative light?

"You don't get it because you're in shock, Briar." Peter suggested, making Briar shut her eyes tightly. She grabbed the bandages out of the first aid kit and asked him to explain further. Peter insisted, "I hate getting hurt as much as you hate seeing me injured like this, but it's all a part of the job. If I'm not out there every night, then who would make sure you're safe?"

"That's not your job, Peter." Briar affirmed, meeting his eyes sternly. She grabbed the disinfectant again and prepared to sanitize the smaller, healing cuts on his face and hands. "I can take care of myself. You're using a lame excuse because you're unwilling to stop!"

"And you're being difficult!" Peter snapped, letting go of Briar's leg and balling his hands together into fists. "You don't get it—you're not a superhero, you're not an Avenger, you're just you. You just found out that I'm Spider-Man and you're already trying to get me to take a break, but you don't understand what it's like to be able to do the things I can, to have the power to protect people."

"But Peter, at what cost?" Briar cut in, making Peter huff. "You're gonna end up dead if you keep doing this."

"The people who deserve to be here more than me are dead, Briar. I can't just be taking breaks whenever I feel like it, so stop giving me unwanted advice on something that doesn't concern you, that you know nothing about."

Briar sat there silently, overwhelmed by his sudden outburst. He'd never talked to her in that tone or ever made her feel so inferior. Briar was good at masking her emotions when it was convenient for her, but now it felt difficult to hide the pained look on her face.

"I might not be all special and powerful like you are," Briar sniffled as the weight of her terrible day began to feel heavy on her shoulders, "but I'll always be the first person to make sure you're okay after patrolling and missions. I'll be the one to patch you up at three in the morning because you refuse to go to the hospital and expose your identity. No matter how much superheroes go against my personal beliefs, I will stick with you through the good, the bad, and the ugly because it's you. From now on I'll always be worrying about your safety. So actually, it does concern me."

She didn't say anything after that, but like a cycle, Briar had returned to her glum, disappointed state. The two sat in silence as their new fates settled in, Briar tending to the wounds on his face distracted by the thoughts racing in her head while Peter stared at the tears building up in her eyes. This was definitely not the way the night was supposed to go.

"I'm sorry." Peter whispered, guilt laced in his tone at the defeated and disappointed look Briar wore. She shook her head absentmindedly and reached over to grab a smaller bandaid for his cheekbone. Peter was amazed at how delicate and careful she remained with him despite her probably despising his guts right now.

"Tonight has been absolute shit." Briar sighed and Peter leaned in closer to her as she put the bandage on his face. "I'm still mad at you, but I'm too tired to continue arguing, so now that I've patched you up, can you walk me home, please? It's late."

Peter nodded swiftly and Briar stood, reaching her hands out to help Peter stand. "You don't want to spend the night?" Briar glanced up and down at the boy before shaking her head.

"I'm really exhausted and my parents are probably still waiting for me." she tossed him a grey hoodie he had hanging on his desk chair. Briar also knew that Peter would be in pain tomorrow and that her sleeping beside him on that tiny bed would only make his muscles feel worse in the morning.

"Okay." Peter nodded, pushing the thought of Briar needing space from him to the back of his head as he managed to muster up a believable smile and change the topic. "So.." he started as they began walking out of his room and the apartment. "You're in love with me?"

Briar let out her first genuine laugh of the night and gently laced her fingers with Peter's. "That's a conversation for another time."

( BACK TO PRESENT )

"It took me a while to get used to the fact that I was dating a superhero," Briar admitted reflectively, smiling softly as she felt Peter squeeze her hand again, "and eventually I did. Doesn't mean I liked it."

"Yeah, now that I think about it," Peter began, tilting his head and scrunching his left eyebrow, "pretty much everyone in my life tried to get me to quit being Spider-Man."

Briar chuckled halfheartedly and shook her head in disagreement. "We didn't try to make you to quit—" Briar paused when Peter tilted his head and narrowed his eyes knowingly, he always knew when she was lying. "Okay, yeah, maybe we did. But it was all because we were worried, you were a reckless, fifteen year old kid who was constantly being put through all different kinds of pressure and danger."

This would've made Peter from five years ago huff and puff. It most likely would've started an argument between the two that would've lasted for a week or longer because they both refused to let the other person be right. Now, Peter smiled sheepishly and shrugged his shoulders, nodding in agreement.

"I'm pretty sure that's something May's said to me before." he groaned, tilting his head back towards the couch cushion. The mention of Peter's aunt made Briar burst into a fit of giggles. Peter rolled his eyes, "Do you remember when she found out I was Spider-Man, and you had the audacity to side with her?"

"You can't blame me. May gets very scary when she's mad." Briar recalled the memory as her laughs subsided. May had discovered Peter's alter ego on accident—not on purpose. She found out not too long after Briar had, just a few days later. "And, she made some pretty good points that I tried to tell you, but you were stubborn."

━━
( 7 YEARS AGO ━ SEPTEMBER 27th, 2016 )

Only three days had gone by since homecoming, and it seemed as though things were slowly calming down. The Vulture—Adrian Toomes—had been caught, Briar—and coincidentally Michelle and Harry—finally knew about Peter's alter ego, and Tony Stark commended Peter for catching the Vulture and preventing his plane from being stolen. It felt like things were slowly but surely falling into place, like there was a clean slate for Peter.

It was also finally beginning to feel like Autumn. There was a cool, fresh breeze blowing into the streets of Queens that made it perfect for Briar and Peter to go on walks around the city.

They still hadn't discussed the elephant in the room. Briar didn't have much of a grasp on what was going on in their relationship, and Peter—he was absolutely clueless, just playing it by ear at this point. The past three days were spent arguing one minute, then acting completely normal in the next. The arguments were not hostile, it was more of getting their thoughts out, endless rambling to let out their frustrations with each other. Again, clean slate.

Briar wanted so badly to be angry with Peter, but the problem was that she didn't know what exactly to be angry about. Missing out on homecoming was beyond her, and now that Peter had explained how he became Spider-Man, him keeping it a secret from her didn't irritate her as much as it should've. Now, all that was left was the frustration of having a million questions running through her head. She was conflicted and she hated feeling so helpless.

As Briar walked with Peter from Midtown High to his apartment, she couldn't help but notice he was being awfully quiet. Uncharacteristically quiet. Things weren't necessarily tense between the two of them, but Briar could definitely tell when something was on his mind. She instinctively decided not to mention it, instead providing him with comfort using a small, silent gesture—lacing her fingers with his.

Halfway to Peter's apartment, he finally spoke up. His silence was beginning to worry Briar, but she knew Peter couldn't be quiet for that long. "Can we talk about what you said on Friday?"

"Huh?" Briar questioned, walking with Peter at a slower pace as he nervously swung their intertwined hands. "You're gonna have to be more specific, we talked about a lot on Friday."

Briar could feel Peter's hand grow clammy as he nervously spluttered, "You know, uh, you said—you told me—you were in love with me?"

Now, it was Briar's turn to grow anxious under her boyfriends gaze. What he considered to be hopeful, she saw as panicked, in a negative way. "Oh."

Peter's left hand gripped his backpack strap tightly. Her words hadn't left his mind since Friday. "Were you being for real?"

As Briar felt her heart begin beating wildly against her ribcage, the weight of their conversation began to set in. She'd have to pick her next words very wisely. "Uh.. yeah." Briar rarely ever became speechless, but she was fairly shy, if not more than Peter. His intense stare made her feel an immeasurable amount of pressure. "I've come to love you.. very much."

Peter's eyes widened with surprise and he looked just as he did back when Briar agreed to go on a date with him—it was like he had been expecting her to reject him or completely dismiss the idea. "Oh, well that's—that's cool. More than cool. Great. Lovely. Spectacular, actually."

Briar knew Peter stuttered and rambled frequently when he was nervous, so it comforted her a little knowing she wasn't the only one feeling this way. Briar could practically hear her conscience—Michelle and Harry—on each of her shoulders, whining in her ear about how pathetic and disgusting her and Peter were.

"Spectacular?" Briar repeated in a teasing manner, the corners of her mouth upturning into a sly grin. Peter groaned at his own word vomit and nuzzled his head against Briar's hair. The action made Briar giggle and nudge him away with her free hand.

Peter brought their hands up and gently kissed Briar's knuckles before he let their hands swing between them again. "Yes, spectacular, because I—in fact—I've come to love you too. I always will." they kept walking at their normal pace, but he turned his head to meet Briar's eyes with the most adoring gaze she'd ever received. It felt genuine.

"That's.." Briar tried describing how his positive reaction made her feel, but couldn't find the proper words.

"Cool? Some would even use the word.. spectacular?" Peter suggested, making Briar roll her eyes and push Peter away from her and towards the entrance to Peter's apartment complex. Briar and Peter's hands separated as they arrived at the apartment, the topic of their conversation shifting smoothly as they slipped off their shoes and grabbed snacks from the pantry before retreating to Peter's bedroom.

Their words died down gradually as they stepped in and noticed a brown paper bag sitting on the middle of Peter's bed, standing out suspiciously around the rest of the clutter in his room. On the paper bag written in black marker were the words "This belongs to you" along with the initials TS.

"I didn't know you knew Taylor Swift." Briar chuckled dryly, unpleasantly disappointed by the presence of the bag, or more so, what's in it. Only three days had passed since Briar discovered Peter was Spider-Man, but it had been much longer since Tony Stark took Peter's Spider-Man suit. During that time, his grades have improved in all of his classes, he had more time to hang out with his friends, and he was present in Decathlon meetings.

Overall, he was acting like a normal teenage kid. And Briar could tell that he was sleeping more and feeling more positively about himself than he had just a week and a half ago.

"Very funny." Peter replied sarcastically. He took a step back to look into the hallway before confirming to himself that his Aunt was gone from the apartment before giddily launching himself onto his bed. He laid on his back and cradled the bag carefully, sighing audibly as he treated the suit inside like he would his own child.

Briar rolled her eyes and tossed her backpack on top of Peter's desk before tossing herself beside Peter. "Hey!" Peter flinched and turned himself on his side to shield the paper bag, "There's precious cargo here." he reminded her seriously, clutching the million dollar suit to his chest.

"I'm gonna pretend you didn't just hurl yourself away from me to say that." Briar told him upon hearing his muffled scoff, "C'mon, show me the suit!"

Peter's mouth spread out into a wide, surprised grin, his eyes widening and reflecting the sun peaking through the windows, adding onto his overjoyed glow. Briar didn't like the whole superhero gig, but she did promise Peter she would try to support him. And she had to admit, seeing that smile on his face did make her happy.

"Really? Okay," Peter jabbered and leaned closer to press a short series of kisses to Briar's cheek. When he pulled away he sat up and Briar was quick to notice his sudden shift in mood. "Should I change in here? I could go to the bathroom or I could just quickly change here and you can face the wall.. or I wouldn't mind it you look—unless you mind! I just usually don't wear clothes under the suit. Not for any weird reasons though! I wear boxers, I just—"

"Peter," Briar interrupted his incessant rambling, looking up at his flustered face. His cheeks were the only area of his face that showed color, the rest was flushed and pale. "you can get changed in your room. I'm gonna turn around because I don't think you'll be able to pull that suit on without getting flustered and tripping over your feet. And then you'd have to explain to May how you face planted and got such a big bump on your head."

Peter nodded repeatedly but continued to avert from her gaze. "Y-Yeah, that wouldn't be good." he chuckled shakily. Without another word, he took the paper bag and walked over to his closet, leaving Briar to chuckle quietly amongst herself as she turned to stare at Peter's wall of Star Wars posters.

He slipped the suit onto his body in a matter of seconds and shyly beckoned his girlfriend to face him. Upon shifting her body around, Briar's eyes landed on the lycra material that clung to Peter's body, gazing up and down at the expensive piece of technology—and the way it looked on her boyfriend's body—while keeping her expression stoic.

Briar's silence and drawn out lack of emotion made Peter nervous. He found himself becoming antsy under her stare, not because he was uncomfortable, but because he was impatient to know her initial thoughts. "So, what d'ya think?"

Her unreadable expression lasted for a few more seconds before Briar picked herself off Peter's bed and let out a small scoff. "I'm kind of upset at how good it looks on you."

Peter visibly lit up at her confession. "Really?" Briar hummed and grabbed one of Peter's hands, lifting it above both their heads and beckoning him to spin.

She observed the texture of the fabric and the round spider logo on the back of his suit as he spun around slowly, letting out a low whistle and nodding to herself. "You bet. It's made by a billionaire, of course it's gonna look cool. Oh, and it works wonders for your ass, by the way."

His cheeks turned a bright shade of red, almost mimicking his suit. He internally cursed himself for not putting on the mask before telling Briar to face him. "I'm only teasing. Not only does your "precious cargo" accentuate your precious cargo astonishingly, I'm sure that it's also practical and keeps you safe, safer than that sweatsuit you wore on Friday, anyway."

"Thanks." Peter smiled, the heat that had arose to his cheeks slowly fading away. He appreciated the fact that Briar wasn't being stubborn and was actually making an effort to learn why Peter loved being a superhero so much. And he wasn't trying to change Briar's beliefs whatsoever, he was just glad that they were both equally trying to find some sort of middle ground. "Do you want to try on the mask?"

Briar's eyes caught the smaller piece of fabric in his hands and narrowed her eyes skeptically. She didn't look afraid of the expensive piece of technology, just intimidated by what it stood for to Peter and to all of Queens. After seconds of contemplation, Briar silently agreed by meeting Peter's stare and nodding slowly.

While Briar used both her hands to hold down her curls, Peter grabbed the mask at it's sides and gently pulled it over her head, making sure to get most of her hair under. When Peter finally got the mask over her face, only the ends of her hair poked out from the bottom.

"This is so dope!" Briar exclaimed cheerfully, the white and black eyes blinking rapidly as Briar clapped her hands together in excitement. The rest of the suit was on Peter's body, but through the lenses in Peter's mask Briar was still able to see the functions of his suit. "You have a heater, cooler—a police radio!?"

Peter chuckled and nodded. "Mr. Stark had it installed. If my senses aren't working, I'll be notified about crime through there. Most of the time it's muggings or car crashes in the intersections on 16th or even upstate though."

"Hm.." Briar hummed, a sign that she was only half listening as her eyes discovered new functions of his suit. Suddenly, the mask's eyes went wide and the white material enlarged. "Hello? Hello?"

Peter watched in confusion as Briar tensed up as if she was afraid, before extending her arms to the side shortly to detect her surroundings. It took Peter a few seconds, but then realized Briar had just discovered Karen. Seconds later, the eyes decreased in size and went back to normal. "It's nice to meet you too, Karen, how has your day been so far?"

Peter let out a small chuckle, making a snarky comment to Briar, teasing her for asking an AI such a personal, human question. After subtly pulling her middle finger on him, Briar began speaking to Karen.

After a few minutes of allowing Briar to toy with the mask and gossip with Karen—who, embarrassingly enough, decided on her own to show Briar videos of Peter impersonating the Avengers—the eyes enlarged again. "Instant kill? Karen, no!"

Just as the eyes on Peter's mask were turning pitch black, Peter let out a shriek and pulled the mask of his girlfriends head. When he removed the mask, Briar's was eyes were still large and round, emphasizing her sudden scare. Peter took notice of her shocked look and the way her hair popped up afterwards, fluffy and curly. He let out an airy laugh, "That's Karen, she's—"

"So cool." Briar smiled gleefully, "She also seems like a responsible babysitter for you while you're on patrol." she added slyly, making Peter's mouth gape.

He swatted at her hip with the mask still clutched in his hand, "You see, at any other time I would've been offended by the fact that you think I need a babysitter," Peter commented, "but you looked very cute with my mask on, so I'll let it slide."

Briar rolled her eyes and stuck her tongue out at Peter, pretending to gag. "You're still too flustered by the fact that I saw you pretending to be Thor in front of your bathroom mirror to come up with a good comeback." Peter playfully feigned shock by dropping his jaw and grasping his hands onto his chest. She was completely right. "You're ridiculous." Briar pointed out heartily.

"That may be true," Peter began, lowering his hands to rest them on Briar's hips and gently pull her closer to him, "but somehow, you've still managed to fall in love with me." he reminded her smugly, not missing the way Briar's right hand swatted at his chest.

"You cocky little shit," Briar laughed breathily as Peter stared at her with a lovestruck gaze, cheekily fumbling with his fingers that rested on Briar's hips to tickle her, "you're never gonna stop bringing that up, will you?"

"Nope. I'll keep bringing it up, for as long as you live." Peter promised, a snarky smirk on him that irked Briar and provoked her to kiss off. She softly pecked his lips as her hands settled against his chest. Pulling away much too quickly for Peter's liking, Peter huffed and before a full pout could work it's way onto his face, he leaned further into her touch.

Unfortunately, Peter was unable to connect their lips before a loud scream pierced through their ears.

"What the fuck?"

At the sound of the shrill shriek, Briar pulled away abruptly from Peter, while his delayed senses fell into a shock. Subconsciously, Peter grasped Briar's waist tighter as his muscles tensed. His head whipped around to confront his potential threat, his heart falling to the floor as he was faced with his Aunt May, staring at him wide eyed and terrified.

Peering over Peter's shoulder and wincing at yet another uncomfortable situation she'd found herself in, Briar grimaced awkwardly and peeled Peter's hands from her body. As she was beginning to inch backwards and reach for her backpack to exit the apartment, May made a sharp noise that one would usually hear dog owners use to command their pups and pointed to the edge of Peter's bed, ordering for the two to sit down.

"May, let Briar go home. This has nothing to do with her—" Peter started.

"Sit. The both of you. Now." May barked, making both teens scramble away from each other. "How long have you known?" May demanded an answer, her eyes narrowed at Briar. She'd seen May use that look on Peter before, whenever he showed up home late or forgot to pick up something from the Deli. But not once had she felt the interrogative, threatening eyes of May Parker used against her.

"Since Friday." Briar voiced loud enough for May to hear, unable to get rid of the shakiness in her voice. She felt scared of May in Mother Hen mode. She also didn't want May to think that she intentionally helped Peter keep this big of a secret from her. Or that she sided with Peter in any form. Team May all the way, as Briar would say.

Briar glanced over to Peter for a second, immediately noticing the way his foot was bouncing repeatedly against the floor, making it creak when he applied too much pressure. May stepped in the room and rolled over Peter's desk chair to the middle of the room, sitting down as her glare hardened at her nephew.

"What did I tell you? What do I keep telling you?" May fumed, her voice cold and stern making Briar's body stiffen. She didn't like being in the middle of two Parkers in an argument.

"May—"

"You run the other way, Peter." May repeated. A phrase she'd told Peter countless times, practically every time she saw Spider-Man on the news or read about him in the Daily Bugle. "After everything, everything that's happened, you come at me with this?"

Briar watched the painful scene before her as May stood up from Peter's desk chair, holding her clenched fists by her sides. Peter gripped the mask in his hand like a vice, suddenly bringing his eyes up from the floor to his aunt's.

"Do you think I asked for any of this?" Peter cross examined. His eyes fell to the mask in his hands and the red and blue fabric that adorned his body. "I didn't want any of this. But I have to, I have to do—"

"No." May interrupted, extending her finger aggressively and pointed it towards the floor. "You do not have to do anything. No you don't—you're fifteen years old! You take off that suit and give it to me. Right. Now." she commanded, her eyebrows etching together as she opened her palm.

Peter stood from the bottom bunk of his bed and held up his mask in front of May, just far enough from her grasp. "Taking the suit won't stop me. I've learned that being Spider-Man is more than just having a suit. So you can have it, you can take everything, but you can't prevent me from protecting the city."

"Briar," May called exasperatedly, "you and your family hate superheroes with a passion. Tell Peter he's making the wrong decision. If he doesn't listen to me, he's bound to listen to you."

Briar's mouth fell agape, suddenly shy under the stares of the Parker's, who were both silently pleading for her to take their side. "I wouldn't call it a hate, just a strong dislike—and I tried, it's useless. I told him about the damage he's causing to the community that he isn't aware of—the loss in business revenue, taking out jobs, destroying the already shitty economy, the overwhelming amount of collateral damage, not to mention the survivor's guilt and grief people are feeling in what's left of Sokovia—"

"Okay, Briar, we get it—you strongly dislike me." Peter scoffed, annoyed by the fact that his girlfriend and his aunt were siding against him.

"No, I love you." Briar reassured him, trying hard to ignore the look of surprise on May's face she caught from the corner of her eye—a sign that this would definitely be questioned by her later. "I just hate the Avengers in general. You're not an Avenger though—you're a vigilante—technically, that makes Spider-Man less unlikable."

"Peter," May brought her hands up to grip at strands of her hair at the top of her scalp. Now, it was her voice that was begin to shake and crack, "why are you doing this to me? I don't want you going out and putting yourself in danger. I can barely stay calm when you come home late."

"May—"

"Your Uncle Ben died doing nothing," May hissed harshly, tears now forming in her eyes. Peter took a step back at his aunt's rough tone and his eyes widened at the mention of his uncle, "and you're here, telling me that you go out and look for people like the ones who killed him?"

Her knees buckled under the emotional weight of her lost lover and May fell back onto Peter's chair. She planted her elbows on her knees and allowed her tears to fall into her palms, shaking her head slowly as her sobs became audible. "I won't let you do that."

Briar grimaced and gently wiped away a tear that fell from her eye. She hadn't gotten the opportunity to ever meet Ben, but Briar was well aware of the impact he had on the Parker family. Briar entered Peter and May's life at a time when they were still mourning the loss of Ben, and it was painful to see May, a woman so strong and powerful, look so weak and still be in so much pain and grief.

Briar looked up and her eyes softened at Peter, who was no longer clutching onto his mask so tightly, instead looking down at his aunt with remorse and pain in his eyes. "Uncle Ben died because I failed him, May. I'm a fifteen year old kid who can stop a bus with his bare hands—I have all this power to keep people safe. I know it's not my job, but it's my responsibility."

May lifted her head from her palms, revealing her tear stained, sodden face. "Everything I've done since he was taken from us is to make things right. I don't need you to accept this, May, I—I just," Peter paused and squatted down until he was eye level with his aunt, "I just need you to understand."

Just as May was about to respond, the hairs on Peter's arms shot straight up and he whipped his head around to the window. His senses were going off. Letting out a long sigh, Peter leaned in and pressed a chaste kiss to May's forehead and stood up again.

Having a clue as to why Peter was getting up to leave, Briar's gaze fell to her hands that were in her lap and shook her head in disapproval. She felt Peter step closer to her and lean down to kiss the crown of her head before his footsteps stomped towards the window.

"Someone needs my help. I gotta go," Peter called out to May, who was staring at him pleadingly. "I'll be back, May. I'll always come back." Peter let out a breathy, nervous chuckle, "And if I don't.. you can ground me! But just like you'll expect me to come home, I expect you both to be there when I return."

And with that, Peter swung out the window, leaving arguably the two most important people in his life behind.

( BACK TO PRESENT )

"Not one of my best moments." Peter admitted sheepishly, adjusting the back of his black turtleneck. Briar sarcastically nodded along, pulling her hand from his to tap his knee in agreement.

"Oh, for sure. Definitely not the worst either, though." she reminded him. Peter furrowed his eyebrows and tried to think back to a time when he had fucked up worse than that, but nothing specific came to mind. He figured it was probably all of Peter's worst moments accumulated together that Briar was referring to.

"During these past five years, I've realized just how reckless I was being." Peter shared, "I really had no regard for my own safety or well-being, I just kept doing it because it felt like something Uncle Ben would've expected me to do. It felt like a way to avenge him in some sort of way."

"I remember you telling me something like that before the Snap." Briar spoke softly. "Was it different when we vanished?" Peter didn't mind talking about his past self before the Blip, but having to think back and talk about his experiences during the years of the Blip was hard.

He felt a bit of irritation bubble at the pit of his stomach, but ignored it. She was just curious, he reminded himself.

"Um.. yeah," Peter paused as if he was still deep in thought. Really, he remembered it all like it was just yesterday. Five straight years of grief don't leave you that easily. "Suddenly everything I've ever done for Queens, to protect you and May and Ned, it all felt worthless and wasted when I came back from space. I didn't have the motivation to do anything at the time."

"Makes sense." Briar pulled her hand from Peter's to fumble with her own. She still hadn't picked up on Peter's bubbling annoyance, but she noticed how things felt more awkward when Briar asked about Peter's time during the Blip. Though she couldn't help but feel curious, she just had so many questions. "So when Tony and Mrs. Potts took you in, you put the suit away permanently."

"Not really.. I stopped patrolling and missions when I got back—until we brought you back—but I had to wear it when I started training the new Spider-Man."

"There's another Spider-Man?" Briar gasped and covered her gaping mouth with her hand.

"Yeah, he didn't blip like you did. He's originally from Brooklyn, but he got accepted to attend Midtown." Peter informed her, "A year or two after the Snap he started appearing on the news and Tony finally tracked him down for me."

"What's his name?" Briar inquired, suddenly more intrigued. "Wait—how is that possible? Was he bit by the same spider as you?"

"I can't tell you his name! His identity is a secret." Peter laughed, "And the spider that bit me is dead, we're still unsure of where the one that bit him came from."

Briar hummed and suddenly went quiet. It had just hit her that there was another person out there who was burdened with the responsibility of Spider-Man. "Do you feel bad for him? That he'll have to go through all the things you have?"

"I'm scared for him." Peter admitted and rubbed at his eyes, "I try to tell myself that I've taught him well and he won't make the mistakes I have, but that's what Tony thought—and look at the messes I've made, all the fuck-ups I've had."

Before Briar could protest, Peter was quick to cut in and continue. "There have been so many times where I've messed up so bad. Remember when you got hurt because of Spider-Man?"

"Peter, I've told you to let that go, I don't blame you." Briar attempted to reassure him, only earning a scoff of disbelief in return.

"You wouldn't've gotten hurt if it weren't for me."

━━
( 7 YEARS AGO ━ NOVEMBER 1st, 2016 )

"Are you listening to me, Briar?" Peter seethed, running his hands through his hair frustratedly. He had taken his mask off a while ago, too frustrated to care about revealing his angered expression. The tips of his ears were a light shade of red as he paced back and forth in front of Briar, who was sitting in front of him on the gravel atop a random building on the outskirts of Queens. "You almost got yourself killed!"

Briar and Peter had been going back and forth on the topic for almost an hour now. Obviously Briar hadn't literally ran into the face of danger. She just happened to be at the wrong place at the wrong time.

Everyone knew that Briar had a terrible habit of joking around when she was in uncomfortable situations, but joking about how they would make a pretty good superhero duo only added fuel to Peter's fire.

She figured it would be best if she held off on telling him what the public would call them: The Spider and The Butterfly. She came up with her name while thinking about the Batman movies and how Bruce Wayne used his greatest phobia against his enemies. If Briar hadn't come so close to dying today, Peter likely would've thought it was a clever idea.

At this point, Briar was tired of arguing. But it wasn't like she was just going to call it quits just to end their argument. She was frustrated, irritated, and snappy. Briar released a breath and forced herself to push back the irritation that was beginning to bubble up in her chest. "I already said I'm sorry, Peter."

Peter's lips were pulled into a thin line as his eyes focused on the tiny, rough pebbles beneath his feet, avoiding eye contact—something he did when he was upset or deep in thought. As he looked over the edge of the rooftop, he noticed the colors in the sky slowly changing and merging—night was beginning to fall. "I don't want to hear it, Briar."

Briar grit her teeth and let go of her butterfly locket she had been fiddling with to push herself up from the hard gravel. She stepped up to halt Peter from pacing across the roof of the building, the noise was becoming irritatingly obnoxious. Her body was aching, she was slightly in pain, all she wanted to do was lie down. But if she told Peter she was in any kind of pain, it would make him feel guiltier than he already was.

She grasped Peter's blistered, dry hands and rubbed her thumbs over his bruised knuckles lightly. "Please, Pete. I'm sorry." He looks at Briar for the first time in a couple minutes and feels himself melting at her words and his eyes softening at the genuine, solemn smile she was able to muster up for him, to show that she was here and safe. It's only when she reached up to cup his cheek with her palm that he jerks away from her embrace, leaving Briar shocked and defeated.

"I'm fine, I'm safe, I didn't do anything that you haven't before," Briar muttered, crossing her arms defensively in front of her chest, "Peter. You're blowing this out of proportion." She frowned under the intensity of her boyfriend's glare that made her even more guilty than she had just been. All she did was try to help, and although it was a dumb move considering she didn't have any crazy abilities or powers like Peter, it felt like the right thing to do at the time. Now, she realized that all her irrational actions did was make Peter more aware of just how much danger his loved ones were in by being associated with him.

"Am I, Briar? Because just an hour and a half ago, you threw yourself into the street and outed yourself to someone more than three times your size! Rhino was about to crush the life out of you, and he would've done it without giving it a second thought if I hadn't been quick enough to stop him."

The tight grimace that appeared on her face proved that Peter's words were getting through to her, but what he wasn't understanding was that the little stunt she pulled was done to cause a distraction, to keep him safe. It was all done out of love and concern.

Briar slowly took a step closer to Peter, testing out the waters to see if he would back away. When he remained still, she approached him softly and forced him to make eye contact again. She didn't dare touch him again though, aware that he needed his space to calm down. He was still fuming, his jaw was still clenched shut, and his breaths were ragged and deep, but she smiled warmly when she was met with his caramel colored eyes that she adored so much. "It won't happen again. I'm sorry."

"That's the thing, it can't happen again." Peter's voice wavered as he spoke. "You can't be so reckless. If anything ever happened to you, I-I don't—" As tears pricked at his eyes, Briar nodded understandingly. He didn't have to finish his sentence for her to know what he was getting at.

Peter turned away from Briar's gaze and frustratedly wiped the tears off of his face, not because he was afraid of being vulnerable around his girlfriend, but because he was trying to remain stern to get his point across. An uncomfortable silence filled in the space between Peter and Briar. Both of them were aware that this was more than just an argument, this wasn't just something that could be solved with a simple kiss. However, arguing more about it wouldn't do anything either.

As Peter's feet began to ache, he moved over to the concrete parapet and leaned forward, resting his elbows on the surface and covering his eyes with his palms instead of looking at Briar or the skyline before them. "I will never forgive you if you get yourself hurt for me. Hell, I'll never forgive myself." She shuffled over next to him and let her arms linger by the edge of the parapet.

"I'm sorry. I won't be reckless like that again, I promise." Briar began, "But Peter, you have to understand that no matter what, I'll always fight for you—stop it, you can't tell me not to, not when you would walk to the ends of the earth for me." She spoke in a stern tone.

Hesitantly, Briar reached out to gently pull Peter's hands that were covered by his suit away from his teary face, gently urging him to face her. She pushed her forehead to his, staring deep into his bloodshot, exhausted eyes. The close proximity brought comfort to Peter, and he found himself sighing at the feeling. "I love you. Just as much as you love me."

Peter shut his eyes and pulled Briar into an embrace, wrapping his arms around her waist as he buried his face into her neck. The hug was tight, yet comforting. Briar exhaled shakily as she ran her hand up and down Peter's back reassuringly. She felt him place a chaste kiss in the space between her shoulder and her neck before he pulled his head away to look at her straight on.

Briar felt extremely guilty. Just by looking at Peter's disheveled expression, messy hair, and tear stained cheeks, she could tell that what happened took a bigger toll on Peter than he was showing. He had lost almost everyone in his life, and today he could've lost her. She knew it would take a while for them to overcome this, and the topic of one of them putting themselves in danger would come up again in their relationship, but as the dust began to settle, they knew they'd make it through this.

( BACK TO PRESENT )

"You need to stop blaming yourself for things you had no control over! You've kept us all safe for so long, but all you focus on is the negative!"

"You sound like Gwen." Peter mumbled under his breath, but it was enough for Briar to feel a little hurt. Or does she sound like me? She attempted to feign a small smile, but her eyes were too honest. They fell to her hands instead as she thought over his small, harmless comment. She should remind you of me, not the other way around.

She shut her eyes for a few moments, "Either way, we can't help change your mind, we can't keep telling you these things if you won't try to believe it for yourself. It's not fair to her and it wasn't fair to me."

"I'm fully aware that I was underserving of you, and it's sure as hell clear to me that I'll never be deserving of Gwen's love, I don't need the guilt trip." Peter assured, his voice becoming a low grumble as he picked under his fingernails with his thumb.

"Peter, you've always had your doubts. You've always felt like you were unworthy of everybody's love," Briar recalled, ignoring the fact that he'd accused her of guilt-tripping him, "but you and Gwen, you two are a match made in heaven. Or hell." Her words spat from her mouth like venom, yet sounded so calm, almost like a backhanded compliment. It almost gave Peter whiplash.

"And what's that supposed to mean?" Briar's eyes snapped up to meet Peter's and found them staring back at her defensively, suddenly more serious than he had been seconds ago. Briar was merely verbalizing her observations from the past couple of hours, but if he wanted her to elaborate, she'd give him just that.

Her hands raised slowly next to her head in an innocent manner. "I was just saying you've got nothing to worry about. You two really, definitely deserve each other."

"You're being sarcastic." Peter stated, crossing his arms in front of his chest.

"I'm being honest," Briar insisted, "I return and suddenly you're engaged? To none other than Gwen Stacy? Y'know—in high school, I played dumb, I acted like it never bothered me—but I knew she had eyes for you."

Peter shifted in his seat and tilted his head, "Are you claiming that when you dusted I took my chance and ran with it? Because, for the record, I didn't leave you—you left me."

"I wasn't insinuating anything." Briar swore, her hands now resting again in her lap. "But like half of the universe, I wasn't gifted the chance to stay alive! I didn't want to fade into dust—it was the scariest moment of my life."

"And mine was returning home to no one. Not a single person." Peter hissed back defensively, "You were gone for five years, you were pronounced dead—I mourned you—what did you expect me to do?"

Now, Briar felt like she was backed into a corner. One one hand, yes, she wished Peter had waited for her. Of course she blipped back and expected to see Peter there waiting for her with open arms, but at the time she had also thought only hours had passed. The moment she was informed of the time that'd passed, she knew she was doomed. So what was she supposed to say?

When Briar remained quiet, Peter's voice bellowed again. "I didn't rush to Gwen the moment you vanished. I waited for you, but I lost hope."

"You don't sound the least bit remorseful." Briar countered shakily, her words only making Peter more defensive. He wasn't enraged, but he was frustrated to say the least. He felt the need to defend himself, his fiancée, and the choices that led him to where he was now. Briar sounded like Peter's conscience when he began dating Gwen, when things started turning around for the better. He didn't like that at all.

"Please don't victimize me," Peter asked, but it came off his tongue like a loose warning. "You don't know the half of it—frankly, right now I'm not sure if you even deserve to know—but put yourself in my shoes for once. I had nothing, I was left with nothing—and then suddenly, people were pestering at me to get on with my life," Peter's eyes still hadn't wavered from Briar's. They weren't sad or hostile looking, mostly conflicted, "and Gwen? She was just.. there for me. She stood by me when I felt like I had no one else's support."

Briar understood that she was supposed to be sympathizing with Peter, but since he still hadn't told her his full experience of the five years, Peter's story sounded more like a weak excuse. His words were truthful, she knew that, but she felt as if he had played it up to become a sob story that anyone else would eat right up. Her eyes hardened as she felt another pang at her heart—if her heart had broken when she found out Peter was an adult and engaged, now hearing the words come from his mouth shredded it to pieces.

"I don't care if that's hard for you to hear—I've gone through too much and the fact at the end of the day is that Gwen was there for me when you weren't, when no one else was. I love her."

Don't worry about her, I love you. Nobody else. Briar scoffed as Peter's words bounced back and forth between the walls of her mind, taunting her and her foolishness for believing him. All the reassuring and constant reminders that she was deserving of love and she was enough, it was all bullshit.

"These five years have changed a lot more than I thought." Briar spoke solemnly, "You're a complete asshole now." She had given up on arguing and Peter could tell she was tired. He wanted to make her see his side of the story so strongly, but Briar was being far too stubborn. In the past, they'd always tried to see each other's sides. But this was different, and it felt more frustrating because Briar herself didn't have a clue as to what happened to her. No one had any answers.

His brain was buzzing too loudly for him to settle down as she had. During the five years, Peter always second guessed himself and everything he did. He would constantly ask himself, "Would May approve of this? Would this have made Briar feel proud of me?". He tried so hard, he'd just gotten to a point where he felt like it wasn't necessary and now he might be learning he had it all wrong? Maybe Peter had become an asshole.

And if that was accurate, then maybe Briar was an asshole too.

But none of that mattered as Peter stared at Briar so coldly, she had to look down. Because in that moment, Briar came up with an astounding conclusion that upset her immensely: either Peter Parker had changed completely since she'd last had him in her arms, or in actuality, Briar had never really known Peter Parker after all.

She refused to believe the latter, but if there was one thing Briar was sure of, it was that the person she was beginning to cower away from arguing with was merely the shell of a boy she used to adore. Now, he was a new man who had been through so much without her that she no longer had a place in his life.

With the way he was acting at the moment, she wasn't even sure if she wanted one anymore.

*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧
( RORY RAMBLES )

yeah bc ofc peter felt anger when he was abandoned and ofc it returns when everyone comes back and acts all surprised that the trauma changed him bc how could it not and ofc he's going to retaliate.. and ofc he's going to be a complete douchebag ofc ofc ofc ITS FINE

this chap was supposed to be a filler chapter w/ a bunch of short cute flashbacks and then i went and made it 10.5k words✋ i hope this makes up for my absence

here's briar's homecoming dress!

the moment where may finds out peter is spidey is inspired by a youtube animation i found months ago! credit goes to them, i linked the video at the top of this chapter!!

make sure to leave your honest thoughts here!! i probably said it before but i've never written angst before this book so the feedback on how i'm doing/what i could improve will really help!!