Niragi

A high pitched beeping sound. Chishiya's voice calling my name through it. A blurred view of his beautiful face making a worried expression. The metallic taste of blood in my mouth. The smell of smoke. A burning pain all over my damn body.

'Niragi! Niragi, are you there? Wake up, come on!' Chishiya's voice sounded like an echo in the distance. The tips of his soft fingers glided over the skin of my hoar cheek.

I lifted my hand to grab his and felt a surge of pain through my whole body. My sight got a bit clearer while I regained consciousness. There he was. I smiled at his relieved face before he planted a kiss on my forehead.

'Hi there,' he whispered.

'Hello darling,' I replied. He helped me sit up and handed me a bottle of water. I cought up some blood but did my best to swallow it. I didn't want to make Chishiya worried about me.

'Your burns got worse again,' he said to me in a serious tone, 'we should go back to our camp to treat them, before they become infected... If we want to get out of here soon, you need to be strong and healthy.'

I felt horrible. I didn't actually think I'd have much longer to live with these wounds. That's one of the reasons I didn't want to agree on leaving this place. I could not imagine a future, because I was convinced that I didn't have one. But I nodded.

As I drank, I looked around at the mess. Rubble, trash and little fires everywhere. Was the damn King of Spades defeated?

I looked up at the sky right in time to see the King of Spades' zeppelin explode into a thousand pieces, the ashes snowing down on us.

When I looked into the distance, I saw Aguni standing next to a dark pile. I distinguished a black cloak. The King of Spades. Aguni kneeled before him and grabbed his lifeless hand. Was it a tear I saw rolling down Aguni's cheek?

I turned back to Chishiya: 'what happened?'

'Heh,' he chuckled, 'you two were fighting well, but I saw you would never make it against the strenght he had.' He pointed towards the lifeless body laying next to Aguni. 'So I had a plan B up my sleeve and used it. Should have tested the proportions a bit better though. I thought my bomb would be a bit... less destructive than it really was,' he continued.

I chuckled too. Then, my eyes drifted towards someone behind Chishiya. Arisu. That fucker was still here?

I scrambled on my feet and grabbed my gun, which was laying on the ground a metre away from me, to point it at him.

Chishiya jumped up in surprise.

I spit out some blood and grinned: 'now that that is taken care of, we can continue our own little game. Remember?'

'I will not fight you anymore, Niragi. Look around. Look at how few of us are left.'

'I genuinely do not care. I don't know what amazing guardian angel is looking over you, Arisu. But you should have been long dead by now. I really do not know how you managed to fucking survive. So I will help the odds a bit and make an end to your pathetic little life!'

'Niragi...' Arisu gasped.

I fired my gun in his direction without hitting him. He jumped up and quickly hid behind a car wreck as he yelled: 'Niragi, stop this! We can still make it up. I understand you, I really do! In the beginning, I could not wrap my head around you. Your behaviour, how you treated the other people at the Beach. But now, I can see why. I see right through you. You are a broken man, just like me. And I believe that there is still hope for you, just like there was for me. Together with Chishiya, you can glue those broken pieces back together.'

I let his words settle in for a moment. He had a point. Besides the part where he compared himself with me. We would never be the same. We could never be the same. Arisu chose hope and peace. Two words I would never be able to attribute to myself. No matter how hard I tried. I would always be broken and he would always be the one to enjoy his happily ever after-story together with his love. He didn't deserve that more than me. He was a life-waster. He broke himself. I did not choose for this life. People made me that way! Théy broke me. Arisu would never understand that. I could better embrace the chaos inside of me.

So I stepped in his direction and whispered: 'we will never be the same.'

Then, I turned around to the one person I could hurt Arisu with the most: Usagi.

Chishiya

For a second, everything seemed nice and peaceful. The King of Spades was dead. We were alive. And we could figure out a way together to beat the Queen of Hearts. But Niragi was still out for blood. I had not been able to convince him in time to change our plan. I saw the change in his eyes and I knew what would happen. They went from loving to raging. Mad. Pshycopathic. Murderous. And everything threatened to go wrong.

I jumped up and stood still, like I couldn't move. I was frozen and everything moved in slow motion before my eyes. Niragi aiming his gun at Arisu. Arisu's fearful monologue to convince Niragi one last time. Kuina descending the staircase, right in time to see this all. Usagi looking scared with doe eyes, like a deer caught in a trap and nowhere to go.

Niragi aimed at Usagi. He had a clear shot. I locked eyes with Kuina. She was afraid. Afraid for her friend Usagi and afraid for the damage this would do to our fragile friendship. The gun fired, the bullet flew through the air. And I jumped.

And it hit me. Right in my side. I locked eyes with Niragi and saw a look of disbelief.

'Wha... what have I done?' he stuttered, his gun smoking in his hand before he let it fall on the ground. He dropped on his knees, tears rolling down his cheeks.

Then, I looked at Kuina. She was so worried. She raced towards me and cried out: 'Chishiya!'

Lastly, I looked down. To my shirt which was turning blood red very fast. To the drops of blood that dripped on the concrete and formed a puddle at my feet. To my own hand, which reached for the gaping wound that the bullet left behind, and the blood stains on it that reminded me of my job as a doctor. And I smiled because I did the right thing for once: not being selfish. If this wasn't going to make my friendship with Kuina right, nothing would!

Then, I dropped on the ground and everything turned dark before my eyes.

[End of chapter forty one]

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Hi! I hope you are happy that I'm publishing again after such a long break. Even though this chapter is a bit shorter than normal, I hope you still enjoyed it. I though you'd like to have something to read fast after my latest update, so I figured I'd chop this part in smaller sections! I still sacrificed a big part of my night sleep for it, so don't blame me! ;) Don't be shy to vote and comment, it really motivates me to go on! Love, Midnightwritings.

Photo from the Alice in Borderland series on Netflix