KABANATA 06:

Meet Sunshine Grin!

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❝Why does my heart feel so bitter and jealous all of a sudden? I don't know why this keeps happening. Like a fire within me that is beginning to flicker with its own flames. This was meant to be trivial. At least that's what I believed. Then, at last, I intervened, acting rashly and unable to understand what it was. I see now. I felt extremely jealous.❞— from the hues of the sunshine

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"WHY? WHAT have I done?" Steele presses his lips together at nginisian na lang niya ako. He appears even more annoying than before! Ha! Kung sa tingin nakakatuwa ang mga pinagagawa niya, pwes hindi! Naiirita na ako! Pwede siyang manalamin at nang makita niya mismo kung ga'no ako kapikon sa kanya!

Kadiri. I refuse to be fooled by that! Ano sa tingin niya sa'kin, ha? Marupok?

As I drew nearer to him, I couldn't help but scoff, each step growing heavier beneath the weight of my unease. My gaze sharpened, cutting through the air between us. Rolling my eyes in exasperation, I finally spoke, "Whatever, Bald Eagle. Excuse me nga, pipili pa kami ng make-up dito. H'wag kang istorbo." 

As I brushed by him, a gentle shove accompanied my move. I couldn't help but wish he understood the weight of his actions—my day had already been tarnished by his presence.

His smile vanished in an instant, and the atmosphere shifted dramatically. A serious look crossed his face as his gaze bore into me, filled with intense focus. Suddenly, he hissed while pointing at himself, catching me completely off guard. 

"Oh, really? A Bald Eagle? Dati, tinatarayan mo lang ako and I'm being called names now? Ibang klase ka na talaga, Eteri. In what way does the majestic Bald Eagle resemble me? Sa gwapo kong 'to ha? Talaga lang ha?"

Napakayabang! Why? Does he believe I was that foolish para lang magkandarapa sa kanya? Tsaka, siya naman ang unang nangaasar, ha? Now what? Do I not have the right to make fun of him as well? Mukha niya! Dapat mag-vlog ako, pero nabwisit na naman ang araw ko dahil kay Steele.

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I clutched my camera bag tightly, feeling the straps slip through my fingers until they dangled loosely at my sides. With determination, I fixed my gaze on him, my cheeks flushing with heat as I shot him a piercing glare. The warmth crept down my neck, and I could feel my lips parting as a hissing breath escaped me.

Each breath weighed heavily on me, as if a storm was brewing deep within, ready to erupt at any moment. And he was the trigger for it all! Bigyan niyo nga ako ng matinding pasensya para sa kayabangan ng lalaking 'to. Kasi konti na lang, matatamaan na 'tong lalaking 'to sa'kin.

"Puro ka hangin," inis kong sinabi sa kanya at sinenyasan ko na lang si Halley, "Tara na nga. Wala na akong mood mag-vlog e."

"Wait," Steele suddenly stepped closer to me, and before I knew it, he reached out and took my hand, "Don't leave just yet."

"Today's my vlog day. Iyon ang mas importante. Ano bang kailangan mong sabihin?" tanong ko na lang sa kanya. 

Nangyayari pa rin ba 'to sa tadhana, o tadhana na ba talaga ang naglalaro sa 'min? Kung gano'n lang din, hindi 'to magandang biro talaga. He's just my ex! 

'Yung taong nag-ghost sa 'kin at gusto ko na lang na kalimutan nasa harap ko lang naman. Matitigan ko nga lang siya, inis na inis na ako! Kalokohan 'to.I must get out of this nightmare. We both took a step back, caught off guard, hardly having a moment to process what was happening when, out of nowhere, a woman approached us. She waved enthusiastically, her face brightened by a warm, welcoming smile.

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As she stepped closer, a smile lit up her face and she moved towards Steele, leaving an air of awkwardness between us. We both instinctively averted our gazes, unable to hold each other's eyes any longer.

Ikaw ang nagsimula, 'di ba? Edi, magsungitan tayo!

"Omg Steely~!"

Lumapit sa amin 'yung babae at napakurap na lang ako ng ilang saglit at tinignan siya mula ulo hanggang paa. Para akong nakakita ng artista! Kumpara kay Steele na may lahing Australian at Japanese, mas kitang-kita ang pagka-foreigner niya.

Siguro kung lalaki ako, magkaka-crush ako sa kanya. When she drew closer, my heart began to race. Ang ganda-ganda niya talaga. 

In her presence, the essence of true beauty comes to life. Her eyes, a captivating shade of blue, shimmer like the sea under the afternoon sun. Her long, curly hair cascades down her shoulders, framing her face perfectly. The gentle arc of her eyebrows adds a soft elegance, while her thin lips curve into a smile that warms the heart.

With a graceful nose that adds character to her features and a radiant morena complexion that glows with vitality, she's a stunning embodiment of beauty in its purest form.

Alongside her striking red dress and elegant white heels, she effortlessly donned a black casual trench coat that added an intriguing layer to her ensemble.

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Napaka-mature ng dating niya, at sa totoo lang, mukha pa siyang mas matanda kaysa sa akin. Tantya ko, mga 35 na ang edad niya.

Biglang nagbago ang ekspresyon ni Steele nang makita siya. He stole a quick glance at her, then shut his eyes for just a moment. With a sigh, he crossed his arms, rolled his eyes, and released a frustrated hiss,"Bunganga mo, Tory."

Tory flashed him a bright smile, her laughter bubbling up like a soft melody. With a playful twinkle in her eyes, she lifted her hands and playfully pointed in his direction, exclaiming, "Okay, that was rude, mister."

'Di ko mapigilan ang sarili ko na mas lalong mainis sa nakikita ko ngayon. Kung bwisit na ako kay Steele, mas inis pa ako sa paglalandian nilang pareho. Then it's settled. 

They appear to have been acquainted. Kanina pa ngumingiti si Steele habang kausap niya 'yung babae. Ang saya-saya pa nila mag-usap! Hindi siya makipag-usap sa 'kin no'n, kaya't mas lalong sumama ang tingin ko sa kanilang dalawa.

Kung maglalandi lang rin lang sila, doon na lang sila sa iba! Respeto naman po sana sa mga single dito. I bit my lip, my gaze shifting to avoid his piercing stare. My fingers curled into tight fists, the sharp edges of my nails pressing hard against my palms. 

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What's making me feel this way? Isn't this unfair? Nakaka-bitter na nga, nakaka-stress pa sila! 

Halley walked up to me, a deep sigh escaping her lips as she wrapped her arms around herself, drawing in the air like a shield. Her gaze locked onto mine, piercing through to my very essence.

Her eyelashes fluttered softly, framing her hazel eyes that held my attention unwaveringly. With a gentle yet undeniable pull, she drew me closer, as if we were bound by an invisible thread.

"Ikaw na lang umiwas teh. Sinasabi ko sa'yo h'wag kang maiinlove d'yan. Payong kaibigan lang ha, and regarding Steele's behavior toward you, I hope you're not deceiving yourself. He needs your assistance with his modeling business pero 'yung sa inyong dalawa, malabong usapan 'yan ate." Paalala niya sa'kin habang marahang tinapik ang likod ko.

Alam ko naman 'yong posisyon ko sa kanya. At sa buhay niya. Hindi ako umaasa don. So I know that he just needs me for their company but not to get back together with me, I'm fully aware of that. Ayoko rin naman gumawa na ng gulo kung ako lang ang tatanungin. Kasi kung sasaktan lang niya ako ulit, h'wag na niya ako daanin sa unti-unti, sabihin na lang niya sa'kin kung ano ang totoo.

Alam ko naman na ang totoo. Na kahit kailan, walang magkakagusto sa isang pangit na tulad ko. Tsaka isa pa, ano na lang sasabihin ng ibang mga tao? Na nag-iilusyon ang cereal monster na katulad ko? I can't even begin to imagine how different his world is from mine. Gwapo siya, at natural lang naman na maraming magkagusto sa kanya.

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And look at me—my Vitiligo earned me the nickname "cereal monster." Magkaiba ang mundo namin kaya mabuti na lang na ngayon pa lang ay umalis na ako sa buhay niya bago pa magkagulo. Hanggang maaga pa. Hanggang 'di pa masakit. In this manner, mas madali sa'kin tapusin kung ano'ng meron sa'min, dahil walang lugar ang isang kagaya kong pangit sa buhay niya. 

"I know," I spoke with a weary sigh escaping my lips.

Dahan-dahan kong inaayos ang camera at inilalagay ko na ang mga gamit ko sa bag. Halley stopped toying with her hair and joined me in tidying up my things. Dapat kasi masaya akong ginagawa ko ang gusto ko, pero nang makita 'yon, bigla akong nawalan ng gana. 

As I approached them, I bit the sides of my cheeks and held onto my chest. I need to leave this place before things get worse because I can tell how much louder my thoughts are getting right now.

I lowered my gaze, staring intently at the ground beneath my feet, trying to steady myself as I took in the moment. I need to leave this place before things get worse because I can tell how much louder my thoughts are getting right now.

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I compelled a smile to grace my lips, easing the tension in my shoulders as I stepped into the world beyond. "Mauna na kami."

Eteri, h'wag ka na umasa. Sampal na sa mukha mo kung ano'ng katotohanan oh. At kung ako sa 'yo, h'wag ka nang umasa dahil masasaktan ka lang kay Steele. Ang mga gwapo ay para lang sa magaganda. Pero para sa mga katulad kong pangit, parang kailanman ay walang puwang ang pag-ibig. 

As she drew nearer, an enchanting fragrance enveloped us, transforming the world into a golden dreamscape. It was as if the air itself was infused with the soothing essence of velvety jasmine mingled with hints of ripe pear, a captivating blend that danced around us.

The aroma lingered in the atmosphere, wrapped in an enchanting softness, reminiscent of Dior J'adore Eau De Parfum—its presence unmistakably alluring and undeniably rich.

Now that I think about it, Steele seems to like this type of girl. 

I glanced away, the weight of the moment heavy on my shoulders. As I began to walk off, my eyes cast down, I raised the camera in front of me, my fingers wrapping cautiously around its frame.

A deep sigh escaped my lips, a release of all that lingered in the air. Suddenly, a gentle touch on my arm brought me to a halt, anchoring me in place for a heartbeat longer.

"Eteri!" the sound of Ate Tory's voice rang out, reaching for my attention like a gentle breeze on a still day.

She turned her head slightly, stealing a glance at Steele, her expression earnest yet struggling to remain composed. Gales of laughter bubbled just beneath the surface, and despite her best efforts, she couldn't suppress the giggles that started to spill from her lips.

Tears of mirth welled in her eyes as she tapped her legs in a feeble attempt to contain the laughter. Was she really seeing my words as just a joke?

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"Hold on, let me clarify this. Kaya pala parang tinatarayan mo ako kanina at mukhang naiilang ka kasi you believe na Steely and I were romantically involved? Nako miss, that will never even happen! Yung mukhang tipaklong na 'to talaga, ha?" Turo ni Tory kay Steele at tumawa pa ulit siya, pero si Steele nanatili walang pakialam, "Magkakagusto lang ako? Plus, 35 na ako, imposible nang mangyari 'yon."

"Age doesn't matter naman ho ma'am." Sagot ko na lang

A soft, delicate sound slipped from her lips as she instinctively raised a hand to cover her mouth. Shaking her head in disbelief, she leaned against Steele, unable to conceal the blush that crept across her cheeks.

Laughter bubbled up, punctuated by sweet snorts and an infectious wheeze. Her hiccups came in intense bursts, only intensifying her joy and the loudness of her mirth. Halos dumiretso siya kay Steele at pinaghahamapas na lang siya dahil tuwang-tuwa siya sa mga pinagsasabi ko. Ginawa pa akong gag show, ha? Wow naman.

"Steely, I'm fond of this girl. She's really amazing!" Aliw na aliw si Tory nang sabihin 'yon, tapos natawa ulit siya habang umiiling. Ako naman, napanguso na lang. And what? What had I said incorrectly?

Her gaze held us captive as we fidgeted, shifting our weight uncomfortably. Halley and I exchanged fleeting glances, whispering softly to one another while she patiently awaited our stillness, ready to dispel our assumptions.

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A gentle cough escaped her lips, and a warm, welcoming smile blossomed across her face, filling the space with a sense of comfort and reassurance as she made her entrance saying, "Just to be clear, Steele isn't my boyfriend. I'm married. My name is Tory and I'm the CEO of the Glam Goddess Sasaki Make-up company."

"Married?" I asked.

"Indeed. Marquez is my last name," Tory explained.

Napa-atras na lang ako dahil sa sinabi niya. Gusto ko na sanang umalis, pero si Halley, nakatayo lang siya doon at tinawanan lang ako. Mabilaukan ka sana sa nginangata mong potato chips! Pinandilatan ko na lang siya ng mata, pero tawa pa rin ng tawa. Kaasar 'tong babaeng 'to! Parang 'di kaibigan!

Tawang-tawa pa siya, ah? Gusto ko na sanang umalis. H—How am I able to say those words? Eh kapatid naman pala 'yun ni Steele. Ano bang malay ko! Ang tagal ko nang walang balita sa lalaking 'yun, kaya ano'ng iisipin ko di 'ba?

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"Ma'am, I—"

"That occurs frequently, so it's all right. Pero kadiri girl! 'Di ako papatol sa mukhang tipaklong, ha." Bulong niya sa akin, at sandali siyang napapikit, tapos umiling-iling na lang, halatang nag-aalinlangan, halos napangiwi na siya bago tuluyang umiling.

Napatingin si Steele sa kapatid niya at sinamaan pa siya ng tingin. 

Pinilit kong ngumiti, pero ang totoo, nahihiya talaga ako. Halos makipag-dogshow ako sa CEO? Hay naku, minus points ka na agad, Eteri! Alam ko na sinabi 'to ni Steele sa'kin dati, pero hindi ko siya pinansin noon kasi inis na inis talaga ako sa kanya! Ano ba 'yan!

Because, honestly, I didn't even intend to become so well-known! What are you expecting me to do? I enjoy making vlogs, so that's why I do them. Not for publicity. Kaya nga nakakapagtaka. I'm not as attractive as some of the girls. Why, then, would she desire a model with Vitiligo?

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Why me?

"But I still." I froze in my tracks, an overwhelming sense of regret washing over me. The weight of my earlier mistakes felt too heavy to bear, and I couldn't bring myself to meet her gaze.

Instead, I bowed my head and took a deep breath, trying to steady the storm of emotions within me. "Ma'am, I did something awful to you. At sobrang nagsisi ako ro'n."

Napabuntong-hininga si Tory habang papalapit sa'kin, at marahan niyang hinawakan ang aking kamay. Hindi niya inalis ang kanyang tingin sa akin at tila ba binabasa niya ang laman ng aking kabiuturan.

Pagkatapos ay ngumiti siya, isang ngiting puno ng sinseridad at ni wala kahit katiting na paghusga na nagmumula roon. 'Di ba siya natatakot sa'kin? How could she have looked at me as though nothing was wrong with me when most people would be terrified if they were to stare at me? 

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Hindi lang talaga ako sanay na may mabait sa'kin.

"Ate Tory?" Tawag ko sa kanya

I found myself unable to tear my gaze away from her, as the atmosphere around us seemed to shimmer with an almost magical glow. Blinking slowly, I became entranced, my eyes drawn to hers—those deep, oceanic hues that held a world of mysteries within them.

She extended her graceful, slender arms, their movements gliding through the air like a gentle whisper, imbued with an all-encompassing tenderness. "Eteri, it's not just beauty that I seek. I know it may be hard to believe, but I need you. You're a wonderful girl with a beautiful spirit, and you possess so much more than you often see. You're the one person that I need in my life. Only you have the power to save my company."

"I—"

Napahawak na lang ako sa dibdib ko, tapos tiningnan ko si Halley pagkatapos noon, pero sinenyasan niya lang ako at umiling at maging siya, hindi rin alam kung ano'ng isasagot. At kumain lang siya ng chips na hawak-hawak niya. 

Given that Ate Tory is kind, I have nothing against her. Alam ko namang mabuti talaga ang intensyon niya, kahit hindi niya ito sabihin nang direkta. And what Halley told me earlier has been on my mind a lot. 

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Kaya naman, napakamot na lang ako sa ulo, tapos ibinagsak ko ang balikat ko, at pilit na iniintindi ang mga sinasabi ni Ate Tory. I guess I should give this a shot, considering it's for Ate Tory's sake.

I could just think of this as another job. At kailangan ko ng dagdag kita, 'yon lang! Wala nang iba.

Ate Tory cast me a piercing glance, her eyebrows knitting together in a concerned furrow. Her eyes met mine, filled with an urgency that was hard to ignore. She leaned closer, her shoulders slumping slightly, and pouted as if to say there was no escape from this predicament.

Her deep blue eyes, which resembled the ocean waves slowly pushing against the shores, were so lovely and serene that they mirrored her inner serenity. She seems to be waiting for them to fall apart.

"Eteri, you need to consider this." Halley said coolly, "Sige na, h'wag mo na akong intindihin. Dadalhin ko na muna ang gamit mo, ha? Akin na 'yan." Sabi ni Halley, tapos kinuha niya 'yung bag ko at nginitian ko siya.

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She flashed me a smile and waved her hand before leaving, saying, "Kaya mo 'yan!"

Teka nga, 'di pa ako nagdedesisyon, ha!

Mukhang wala na akong ibang pagpipilian. I need to ponder this deeply. The stillness envelops us, a heavy silence hanging in the air. It feels as though no one dares to break the quiet, despite the discomfort seeping into the room.

As more people join, the two of us remain mute, caught in our unspoken tension. It's as if silence itself has taken form, suffocating our thoughts, and the very act of breathing feels like a bold violation of its sacredness.

Isa pa, 'di ko rin naman matignan si Steele dahil sa kahiyayan na nagawa ko kanina. We both agreed to step into the cafe, and as Steele opened the door for us, he finally mustered the courage to turn and meet my gaze.

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Parang iba ang timpla niya. Usually, he'd be teasing me, but today his gaze was anything but playful. The gravity of his expression spoke volumes, leaving no need for words.

I couldn't quite decipher what lay behind those eyes, but one feeling stood out—was it guilt? Kung ano man 'yan, masyado nang huli para ro'n.

"I wanted to inform you, Ry. After senior high, I never had a girlfriend. Seryoso ako sa college, at wala akong ibang ginawa kundi mag-aral." Seryoso niyang sinabi na halos manginig pa ang boses niya nang ipahayag ang mga salitang 'yon.

Binuka niya ang bibig nang sandali, at lumapit pero agad naman siyang umiwas ng tingin, tapos tumingin na lang siya sa ibang paligid. Muling nanahimik, tila nag-iisip o iniiwasan ang usapan. The silence thickened around us, a heavy curtain that seemed to draw tighter with each heartbeat. Each fleeting moment stretched on, transforming time into an endless expanse.

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My heart raced as his words struck me like a heavy blow, leaving me feeling as if I were frozen in place. I took a step back, instinctively retreating, consumed by an uneasy tension that filled the air. I could no longer bear to meet his gaze; the weight of the moment was too intense, and I felt as though I needed to escape.

With a low grunt, he clenched his jaw tight, his lips forming a razor-thin line. As his fingers raked through his hair, he tousled it into a wild disarray.

Tension rippled through his shoulders, and he exhaled sharply before finally breaking the silence with, "So before assuming to those, at least itanong mo sa 'kin, wala ka namang dahilan para magselos kay Ate Tory. Trust me, please." Sabi ni Steele, na parang takot na takot siyang masaktan ako at tiningnan niya lang ako na parang nagmamakaawa na.

And what was it that he said? 

He basically referred to me as Ry. When we dated in the past, he would call me by that name. Agad akong umiwas ng tingin sa kanya dahil ramdam ko ang kaba sa presensiya niya. Napakagat na lang ako sa labi ko at ramdam ko pamumula ng mukha ko.

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No, Eteri, stop it. Remember how hurt you were when he left you hanging immediately after he ghosted you? Stop putting your trust in someone who can easily affect you because you made a self-promise to never believe his words again. Tama na. Kaya, please lang Steele, 'wag mo akong titignan ng ganyan. H'wag mo na ako paasahin.

Huwag mo naman akong paasahin sa mga kasinungalingang 'yan—na parang may pakialam ka pa sa'kin!

I closed my eyes, my eyebrows instinctively knitting together in a slight frown. I had no intention of glancing at him as I walked by, completely avoiding his gaze.

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As my fingers brushed against the doorknob, I glanced back at him, offering a smile that didn't quite reach my eyes, and said, "Congratulations for wasting my time if this is your method of deceiving me once more." Was it extreme? Parang nagulat siya sa sinabi ko. Pwes, he deserves it.

I hate him.

As I began my quest for a place to sit, I was taken by surprise. My eyes widened and my heart raced when he locked his gaze on me, his grip tightening around my arm. His eyes are cold and piercing all at once.

Iniwas ko na lang ang kamay ko at pinilit kong hugutin ang lahat ng lakas ko para makawala, pero lalo lang siyang lumapit. "Bakit? May pagkakataon ba na pinakinggan mo'ko, kahit isang beses lang? Nag-sorry ako no'n. But you still wouldn't listen to me."

𝐏𝐀𝐓𝐂𝐇𝐄𝐒 𝐎𝐅 𝐏𝐔𝐑𝐈𝐓𝐘

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Glow up Series #12

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