Ch. 22: He's Not Him

Song For Chapter: The Way I Loved You - Taylor Swift (check out the video on the side, I made it for Elle & Fred [&Henry, poor bloke])

    I clutched the vile of potion in my palm and sighed, knowing that Hermione wanted to talk about what Doctor Dragon had said, but thankfully she knew I was nowhere near the right mood for that conversation. Instead, we arrived back home where Jane was unloading groceries on the counter, I spied a raw chicken, celery, and carrots.

    "Fancy stuff?" I questioned, thinking about what she would be making for dinner.

    Jane nodded with a chuckle. "Yes, Elle. We are having Henry over for dinner tonight, we used to do that all the time - you remember, Hermione?" Jane chuckled, thinking back to memories that I didn't share with the rest of the Granger family. 

    Hermione made a face, obviously not liking those past dinners. "Oh, I remember..." 

    I spared her a questioning brow, but she waved it off, "It's almost four, Elle and I will be upstairs getting ready for dinner - call us if you need anything, mum!" She smiled politely and took my hand, leading me up to our room.

    "So," I prodded once the door to our room was flung shut, "You and Henry, huh?" I tried hard to keep a smirk off my face. 

    Hermione rolled her eyes, shaking her head. "As if - that's not what it was like at all. Truly it was a childish crush, if anything, and he didn't even like me back. I was...," She paused, eyes filled with amusement, "I was an awkward child, if you can believe it."

    "Nooo," I sarcastically objected, earning a soft pillow to the face as Hermione fumed slightly.

    "Shut up, Elle!" She teased lightly, making a smile spread largely on my face. "Huh," Hermione mused to herself, watching me with curious eyes.

    "What?" 

    She waved it off, "Nothing, nothing - that was just the first time I've seen you pull a real smile in a long time." She admitted, brushing herself off as she hopped off her bed and made her way towards our joined closet, pulling it open. 

    I pondered that for a moment. It was true. I had been especially depressed lately, and there was the obvious reason why. Sighing a bit, I let my mind wander to the thought of Henry Ports. He was an attractive, perfectly good-natured guy with a moderate humor that I'd seen.I could even see myself dating him a few years down the road once I got out of Hogwarts. 

    But, he was a dentist.... And, I had to admit. Dentists are slightly creepy. There's just something about them in general. I knew it was stereotypical, and more than likely biased, but they were odd. To me.

    Hermione pulled out a nice cardigan and sun dress for dinner while I yanked a pair of plain jeans and a flannel out, not caring too much for getting all dressed up for our guest. Besides, if Henry was on the level of 'chill' that I'd anticipated, he wouldn't care how Hermione and I looked. 

    I took my sweet time getting myself ready for our guest, and eventually the clock struck five in the afternoon. Hermione spared me an annoyed glance, she had been waiting for me to finish my make-up for the last half hour, but all I was doing was reapplying the same coat of foundation over and over again to keep my hands busy and try not to think of Fred.

    Needless to say, my face felt like a layer of cement had been smothered onto it. 

    "Come on," Hermione huffed out, yanking me out of the vanity seat an pushing me towards the staircase as Dan opened the front door, ushering in a nicely dressed Henry. 'Crap...' I froze, taking in his nice shoes and relaxed tux. 'I'm under dressed...' I turned on my heel half-way up the stairs, but it was too late.

    Henry saw my retreating figure on the stairs and grinned up at me. "Hello, Elle, Hermione." He nodded towards the both of us, tugging nervously on his thin, black tie. "I think I'm a wee bit over dressed, huh?" He chuckled, sending me a calm smile. 

    I shrugged it off and descended the stairs to meet up with Dan and Jane at the base. As long as he was the one dressed wrong, everything was alright. 

    Dinner passed rather lightly. Small talk was made and I struggled not to yawn when the subject turned towards molars and gums; I was attempting to be respectful to both my parents and our guest. Henry asked Hermione and I about school, apparently he was under the assumption that the two of us were attending some prestigious, London secondary school.

     I let Hermione do the talking for me.

    Once dinner was over, I stood up to help Hermione and Jane with the dishes while Dan and Henry talked by the front door, saying their formalities before Henry could go home. I was balancing three dishes on my arms when Dan called us over to say our goodbyes. Carefully, I set the porcelain down and gave the boy a meek smile.

    "It was nice seeing you again, Henry." I admitted. It wasn't a lie, he was rather charming and knew how to keep a conversation going. 

    "You too, Elle." He nodded, hugging Jane and waving towards Hermione as he stepped out the door. Dan said his final goodbye to Henry and shut the door. 

    "Such a nice boy," Dan chuckled, shaking his head at us, "Don't you think, Jane?" He asked as my mother and father walked back to the dining room for clean-up. Hermione sighed and let out a small yawn, despite the fact that it was only eight o'clock. 

    "I think you've changed me for the worst," She blurted out, sending me a small glare, causing my mouth to gape open with shock, but mild amusement. 

    "What are you talking about?" I snickered a little as Hermione rolled her eyes, crossing her arms over her chest and staring deep into my eyes, the almost identical eyes that I had. Her hue was more golden than mine which were just brown.

    Hermione shrugged a bit and turned on her heel, as if to follow our parents back into the dining room. "I have a short attention span, and I don't think the same way about Henry's jokes that I used to, I feel... drained, you've ruined me." 

    "Are you saying I'm boring?" I frowned tightly at her, offended.

    She chuckled, tossing her head back. "No, you daft bimbo, I'm saying that your humor has left me expecting everyone to act as inappropriate and obnoxious as you. Are all Americans like you?" She teased, but the curiosity in her eyes told me it was an actual question.

    I opened my mouth to remind her of Jenna and Lana, but there was a sudden knock on the front door behind us that caused me to drop the conversation and glance towards it. "Hermione, get the door," I told her, despite the fact that I was standing in front of it. 

    She shot me a dirty look, but pulled it open, smile sliding onto her face as she took in the person standing nervously on our porch. Raising a brow, I stepped towards it to peer at them. There Henry was, nervously tugging on his tie and keeping his eyes glued to the cement beneath his feet. 

    "Er," He spat out, scratching the back of his neck before glancing up and meeting my eyes, "Er... Elle? I was wondering -" He stopped himself, sucking in a deep breath, "-And, you can totally say no, if you'd like,... But I was wondering if you'd like to go out with me sometime?" 

    Hermione froze on the spot, keeping her smile on her lips, but I could tell she was afraid of what I would say. She was afraid I would hurt his feelings by saying no too quickly. 

    Furrowing my brow, I maneuvered my way in front of Hermione, so I could talk to Henry directly. After an awkward silence that was filled with me and my thoughts, I took a deep breath and forced a grin onto my face. "Sure, when would you like to go out?" 

    "Tomorrow, if that is alright?" Henry grinned, the nervous nature on his face had subtly washed away. "I know this really great place, it's American Italian." 

    American? I cocked my head to the side, small smile playing on the corners of my mouth. "Oh, really, tomorrow is fine. What's the name of it?"

        "Olive Garden." 

                                                ✧

    Hermione watched me with a small smile on her face as I paced around our room. "Elle, I don't understand why you said yes if you're just going to strut around the room instead of getting dressed for your date," She sighed.

    I had spent the whole day worrying about Olive Garden - it was the best and the worst place Henry could have thought of to take me to. "You don't understand," I whined a little, causing Hermione to roll her eyes at me. I twirled my wand in my hand and flopped down on my bed. "He's taking me to Olive Garden."

    "I've never been there," Hermione shrugged, "Is it bad?" 

    I rolled onto my side, staring across the room at her. "Well, not exactly. Olive Garden is my favorite restaurant."

    "Because it's cheap and Italian?" She questioned, causing me to chuckle under my breath despite how nervous I was. It was scary how well she knew me. Henry had called to say that he would pick me up around seven, but I hadn't made any motion to get ready even though it was already six. 

    I shook my head at my sister and explained further. "Every time I go to that place, it's because someone has bad news to tell me, to soften the blow," I told her as she made an unbelieving face, "For example, my adoptive mother told me I was not really part of my family after my brother, Trey, took me to lunch at - you guessed it - Olive Garden."

    "That's unfortunate," She chuckled lightly, finding sarcastic pleasure in my pain. "But, if you want to back out, you should probably call him now - you're running out of time."

    A furrow carved into my brow as I sat up on my bed, Hermione taking a seat beside me, eyes growing soft. "Why did you accept the date, Elle?" She prodded, laying a soothing hand on my shoulder, reminding me of how motherly she was. "I can tell you're not over him, so -"

    I cut her off, dabbing at the corners of my eyes as Fred's face filled my frantic brain. "I want to stop seeing him every time I close my eyes." I whispered out, feeling my throat clamp up as I talked, embarrassed by all the emotion, but telling the truth. "I want to get over him." 

    My lips trembled and tears streaked from my eyes faster than I could stop them. It hit me hard. Like a trigger deep inside of me was finally flicked on. "I-It is o-over and I nee-d to move on. It's time," I swallowed the coarse lump in my throat, as Hermione wrapped her arms around my shoulders, pulling me in close to herself. 

    "Oh, Elle, it's going to be alright - I promise." Hermione sighed. "Maybe you shouldn't go out tonight, I'll call Henry and tell him that you're ill - or something?" 

    I shook my head, rubbing fiercely against my cheeks, erasing the tear stains. "N-o," I cleared my throat and let a smile slip onto my lips. "I need to get out of this house." 

    By the look in Hermione's eyes, I could tell that she wasn't happy with my choice, but she backed down, nodding slightly and walking to our shared closet, pulling out a floral mini dress and my leather jacket. "Then, you should get ready - these are cute?" She questioned, realizing that both her and I were not the greatest fashionistas out there.

    In mild surprise, I took the clothes into my hands and gave her a quizzical brow. "You've been talking too much with Ginny, haven't you?" 

    She stuck her tongue out at me, a sure sign that I had ruined her humor, and got on her knees to dig through the bottom of our closet, searching for a pair of shoes. She came out with a pair of nude high heels and I immediately shot her down. 

    "No, my converse will work perfect, thank you very much!" I waved my hand, jamming my nose in the air as she shrugged it off and grabbed her book off the nightstand by her bed and began flipping through the pages, done with our conversation.

    Quickly, I changed into the clothes, then got to work smothering make-up on my red cheeks from the sudden fit of tears. As I finished my last line of eyeliner, I paused and my eyes wavered to the other side of the room where Ami was snoozing away in his cage. Lazy bird.

    Sighing, I pulled a pen out of the draw in the vanity and asked Hermione for a sheet of paper, making her lose her place in her chapter. Once I had everything I needed, I decided to write a letter to Jenna and Lana. They were the only people I could really talk with outside of Hermione. Ginny was an option, but seeing as she was a Weasley, there was a possibility that Fred would find out about the letter, and I didn't want to take that chance.

           'Dear Misfits,

    I am writing to inquire about the state of our friendship - seeing as how you sluts neither write nor stalk me anymore. How has this change occurred  I feel cheated. I am in a reckless state, and demand the presence of my two friends. Have thoust died? Have you both perished and I am left unaware? I feel that way, unfortunately.'

    I sighed, a smile planted on my face as I read over the too eloquent letter. It was stupid and weird, but I decided to make them feel uncomfortable by reading it - they would think I was spending too much time with Hermione. Little did they know that I was the one changing her. 

    'Fred and I haven't talked... I am not sure whether we should any more. I know I was stupid - but I hear his business is going really well - he and George and better than ever. So, it must have been supposed to happen. He can focus on his work, and, I can focus on school-'  I snickered at that bit, yeah right.

    'Oh, and... I'm going on a date tonight. He should be here in under an hour, actually - so I'm sending this right before I head out. I'll be expecting Howlers by the time I get back.

                Your fellow misfit, Elizabeth Rose Granger.' 

    Folding up the letter, I lightly tapped Ami's feathered chest and woke him up. They say that animals mimic their owner's personality, and, if that was true, I must give the most evil eye in the universe when people wake me up against my will. Chuckling, I pet Ami's head and put the letter in his beak. "Could you deliver this to Lana? She'll send it to Jenna," I explained to my pet owl, knowing it was pointless. Sparing me one last glare with his golden eyes, he spread his wings and took flight, disappearing into the sky.

    For the rest of the hour, I sat on my bed, twiddling my thumbs while Hermione flipped through the pages of 'Pride and Prejudice'. "Is that my book?" I questioned, agitation growing in the pit of my stomach.

    "Yes," Hermione nodded, eyes scanning the next page before hungrily flipping to the next. She was a fast reader. "I've actually only read this book three times, can you believe that?" 

    "I've read it four times," I admitted, ducking my head in shame. "It is my favorite."

    Hermione chuckled, showing me the pages where I had scribbled in the margins. "I can see that - you annotated it and everything. You also scribbled little make believe spells in the corners," She muttered, straining her eyes to read them. "Do they work?" 

    "Some of them," I shrugged, realizing that I hadn't really dabbled in my favorite pass time in a while. It wasn't really the safest thing to do.

    We fell back into quiet tones as Hermione continued to read about Darcy's love affair with Miss Bennett. After a small amount of time had passed, a knock sounded on our door and our dad peeked into the room, a grin on his face. "Elle - Henry is here, hun."

    A half smile slid on my face at how excited he seemed to be for me, and, as I walked down stairs with Dan, I saw that Jane was having a cheerful conversation with Henry at the foot of the stairs, camera in hand. For a moment, I was worried that it was a polaroid camera - like the one that some how magically appeared when ever Fred and I were having a moment; I breathed a sigh of relief when I saw if was just a normal camera.

    Jane grinned at me and told me to stand next to Henry, pointing her camera at the both of us. "You too look so cute! Let's get a quick picture before you both go out, alright?" Then, after five minutes of Jane trying different angles, Dan chuckled a put a controlling hand on my mother's shoulder. 

    "I think you have enough, dear. Besides - they are just having a first date, it's not the prom," He chuckled, and Jane spared him an understanding nod, lowering the camera and allowing us to leave. Henry nervously reached out his hand, as if to take mine, but slowly drew it back, unsure of how to act around me. As if he was respecting my space.

    We reached his car, it was nothing horrible, but it wasn't anything to gawk at either. It was merely a nice, affordable car. Mature, even. Henry walked over to my side of the car and opened the door for me, causing a blush to spread on my cheeks at how gentlemanly he was being. 

    Once we were on the road, Henry smiled and put on the heater for me, checking that I was comfortable, and, I was. I felt perfectly fine, content even. "You look beautiful tonight," He told me, keeping his eyes on the road, but his cheeks faintly lit up with color, telling me he was not used to the whole dating thing. 

    Neither was I, to be perfectly honest.

    Biting my lip, I turned to glance at his face. "You... you don't go out much, do you?" 

    "Not particularly - is it that easy to tell?" He chuckled, a smile on his lips as he carefully changed lanes. I examined his face. He was attractive, well built, had a nice head of hair, and interesting eyes. I couldn't see anything physically wrong with him. He was charming, so it didn't make sense.

    I nodded, turning my eyes back onto the roads that we drove past. "A little, yeah. But, I don't understand why - you seem like a very nice guy."

    "Well, thank you, I like to think I am." He smirked, teasing me with a prideful jab at himself. Funny too. Something was horribly wrong with the London girls if they didn't go out with him.

    We pulled into the Olive Garden parking lot, the big, green lettering glowing down at me with an almost ominous light. The night was comfortable, we talked about things we were both interested in and what I wanted to do when I got out of school. He told me about his job as a dentist and how my family's business was faring. 

    Henry was sweet, he had a nice personality that allowed myself to actually foresee a time when I could like him as more than a friend. Maybe if I'd never known Fred, maybe if I'd met Henry first. But, now it only felt like I was tainted, ruined, from ever being able to see anyone else with so much passion and excitement in my chest as when I'd seen Fred. 

    And, I decided that I hated Fred Weasley for that. For ruining my brain. For seeping into my very being and causing me to see only him in every decision I made. It was like mind control; I was his victim. And, I was just waiting for it to pass. For my feelings for him to subside. 

    Henry was polite and his jokes were corny, but they worked for him. He was what I should be looking for in a guy. 

                                                ✧

LANA'S POV: 

    Fleur paced around the room in a teal sun dress despite the fact that it was already nine thirty at night. "Oh, you zould ha'e zeen him, Lana!" She flushed, cupping her hands on her flushed cheeks, too ecstatic to take a seat at the dining table, unlike me. "He waz zo romantique, I think Bill iz the one, truly." She sighed, finally calming her fit and sitting in the chair across from me. 

    "Well," I chuckled, finger painting a nose on the hideous painting I was making. I had no idea why I was finger painting like I was four, but it was something entertaining to do. There was only so much one could do in France. "I'm happy for you, Fleur," I sighed, trying to suppress a yawn. 

    There was the sound of a beak tapping against the window pane behind us, and I got up and washed my hands before letting the small owl in. I recognized it immediately as Elle's bird by the death glare it was giving me. "Oh, Ami, welcome." I told it, taking the letter from it's mouth while it waddled towards Fleur's owl's cage in search of a treat. 

    I pulled open Elle's letter and sighed, reading the messy writing. She sounded like something from Gone With The Wind in the first paragraph, making me chuckle at her oddities. However, as I read the second paragraph, I felt my heart sink for Elle. Fred and her were back to their old tricks again, when would they ever learn? Obviously Elle couldn't manage life without Jenna and I...

    Sighing, I wiped the remnants of any paint stuck on my fingers to a dirty rag and raced towards a rotary dial phone sitting on a table against the wall. The Delacores were such fancy people; I would know, they are my cousins. It thought it was odd that they even had a phone when I first came here, but Gabby had told me that their father needed one to make business calls with other wizards around the globe - it was faster than owls.

    Flipping out the dial code book next to the phone, I looked up the exit code for France and dialed it in before putting in the US entry code. Then, after what seemed like forever, I dialed Jenna's number, praying that she'd pick up. 

    It rang five times before a slow yawn answered on the other end. "Hello?" 

    "Jenna?" I sighed, "It's Lana, we've got to write another letter to Elle, let me read it to you." I explained, Jenna letting another yawn out.

    She made a grumbling noise. "Lana, do you have any idea what time it is in California right now?!" 

    "Noon."

    Jenna let out an exasperated sigh. "Exactly! You've woken me up, woman!"

    I flipped her off on the other side of the line, knowing that she wouldn't actually see it, but it made me feel better any way. "You'll want to hear this, trust me," I teased her a little, catching her attention slightly.

    "Why?" 

    I wiggled my brow, holding the letter up so I could read it word for word. "I just got a letter from Elle, and the last line says: 'Oh, and... I'm going on a date tonight. He should be here in under an hour, actually - so I'm sending this right before I head out. I'll be expecting Howlers by the time I get back'."

    "She said what now?!"

                                                ✧

ELLE'S POV: 

    It was later by the time I got home, about ten or so. 

    "I had a really good time, Henry." I told him, being completely honest. 

    Henry grinned and walked me to my front door, respectfully keeping his hands to himself as he did. "I had a fun time too, Elle. I like you." 

    Chuckling, I pushed some hair back behind my ear and sighed, feeling my chest tighten. "Henry, I -I like you, I do. And, maybe some time down the road, I could even see myself falling for you as more than friends, but..." I grasped for the words I couldn't find, it was as if I couldn't think.

    "But?" He prodded, a furrow developing in his brow as nervousness returned back on his face. 

    I frowned a little and stared into his blue eyes, he was such a nice guy. "But, I'm in love with someone else right now, and I need some time to stop being in love with them before I can move on." 

    That was it.

    That was the first time I'd ever said those words about Fred; about anyone. And he wasn't even here to hear it. I felt the familiar tug in my chest, but I was able to hold back. Able to keep control. I felt a blush creep on my cheeks at the thought of Fred and love. It was true, I guess. I did love him. And, perhaps I always will. Just, not in the way that I wanted to. Not in the forever sort of way.

    Henry smiled softly at me and took a step closer, reaching out his hand as if to take mine, but hovering slightly, a look of innocence crossing his features. "May I?" He asked, wanting my permission.

    My eyes watered a little and I let a curt laugh escape my lips. "Yeah, yeah of course." I nodded, grasping his warm hand in mine as he stared into my eyes, filling my chest with comfort. But that was all, just comfort. And, for a moment, I felt terrible that I couldn't like him the way he wanted me to. 

    Henry rubbed the back of my hand with his thumb and gave me a reassuring smile. "If you ever need someone, you know where to find me, Elle." He grinned, releasing my hand. "And, if you ever want to try again, just call first, alright?" He chuckled, causing me to chuckle and rub the corners of my eyes. He was too kind.

    "You're too incredible," I complimented him, "You'll find someone who deserves you some day, I'm sure of it." 

    Henry gave me a weak smile, and retreated back to his car. I watched him drive away, feeling as if I'd just made a new friend rather than a new found love interest, but it was fine. I didn't need any more complication in my life at the moment. 

    Sighing, I trudged upstairs to my room and kicked off my shoes, being greeted with a wide-eyed Hermione. The way her hands nervously turned a yellowed piece of parchment in her hands told me that she had been waiting for me to get home. 

    "What's the matter, 'Mione?" I rushed to her, holding her shoulders as she guiltily ducked her head and let out a low sigh.

    She offered the unopened letter to me, "You've got mail."

    Rolling my eyes, I took the letter into my hands and shook my head. "That was fast, Jenna and Lana are probably furi-ous?" My face fell as the letter opened to reveal messy, familiar scrawl. 

                 'June 1st,' 

        Never taking my eyes off the paper, I felt around for the vanity chair and slowly, carefully, lowered myself down into it, feeling my breathing hitch as they scanned over the words quickly, absorbing every little word.

        'Hey, Letter, I think I may actually send this one this time. You probably won't understand what that means, but if I do happen to send it, it could be a topic starter. The Death Eaters are getting worse, they are targeting Muggles and people born like you and Hermione.'

    I bit my lip, tears slipping down my cheeks and collecting at my chin. It was true, the attacks had been getting worse. Our parents were Muggles, but even they knew something was up. My eyes flickered over the rest of the words, it was slightly confusing, but understandable. The last sentence is what caught me, pushing me over the edge.

        'We need to talk. In person. I miss you.

                    Fred.'

    Biting my lip, I pursed my lips and set the letter aside, trying to regain my normal breathing pattern, but the tears were making it impossible. He wasn't over it yet either. We were both stuck in a rut, unable to move. 

    I stared at my own reflection in the vanity for a long while, not knowing what to do, whether to write him back or pretend I never got it. My mind was making up scenarios of leaving this moment and appearing at the Burrow, but I doubted he was even there. And, Hermione would never let me leave for Diagon Ally at this hour, especially with all the attacks happening. It was too dangerous.

    Swallowing the lump in my throat, I opened the window pane as Ami finally returned at eleven, looking worn out and annoyed, carrying a letter in his beak, along with him was Lana's owl. Blinking back the haze of shock that had gathered, I pulled open Lana's letter to find only two sentences.

            'I sent Dawn because Jenna wants you to respond immediately and Ami seems worn out. What is he like?'

                    Lana & Jenna

    Grabbing a pen from the vanity, I swallowed the lump in my throat and just wrote new entry under their question, feeling tired and sick and a nagging in the back of my head that told me I wasn't going to be able to sleep tonight. 

    Giving the letter to Dawn, I slammed the window shut, causing Hermione flinch behind her book, but didn't say anything. 

              'I sent Dawn because Jenna wants you to respond immediately and Ami seems worn out. What is he like?'

                    He's not him. -E

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Just got the first two one-shots and they are amazing xD aha, I'll put the link to them in the comments! Check 'em out and vote and comment and spread the LOVEE! XD