HEART JOURNAL 

This story is true story of my best friend. I had permission from her to write this. So please don't copy without my permission. Dear...

Chapter 1

It's a long time when she hasn't met him on Yahoo. If she met him, he was so busy to chat with her. She already said that she will never bother him if he set away or busy mode, even if the only reason which makes her on Yahoo is him. She wanted to meet him every time. She missed him every day. 

She's staring the rock in wine glass, thinking of him. Since when was their relationship like this? Why did it be? Looking back every thing, she let out a sigh. 

MR. LONELY: (his nickname): Hey, sister 

KITTY (her nickname): Hey, brother 

MR. LONELY: How are you? 

KITTY: I'm ok. And you? 

MR. LONELY: Not good 

KITTY: Why? 

MR. LONELY: Because I missed you 

KITTY: :D 

She just smiled when he said that. Except once... 

KITTY: Hi 

MR. LONELY: Hi 

KITTY: How are you? 

MR. LONELY: I'm still ok. And you? 

KITTY: Me too 

MR. LONELY: It's too late why haven't you slept yet? 

KITTY: I don't want to sleep. How about you? 

MR. LONELY: I'm waiting my girlfriend 

KITTY: Ah. (It's the word when she understood something). 

She was sad a bit. But she quickly forgot it because it's 0:0 a.m. this time. She could do her plan. 

KITTY: Do you know why haven't I slept yet? 

MR. LONELY: No 

KITTY: Because ... It's hard to say. 

She couldn't stand laugh when she said that. 

MR. LONELY: Tell me 

KITTY: Because I miss you 

She was still laughing. 

MR. LONELY: Really ?  

KITTY: Really 

MR. LONELY: I miss you too 

KITTY: If I say I love you, what will you say? 

MR. LONELY: T (her real name) are you drunk? 

KITTY: No, I'm not. I didn't drink. Tell me 

MR. LONELY: So I'll say I can't accept you.  

KITTY: It's hurt me. 

MR. LONELY: Because I have girlfriend. If you said this few months ago, I would accept you. 

KITTY: I see 

MR. LONELY: Are you ok? 

KITTY: Haha... Do you know what day today is? 

MR. LONELY: What? 

KITTY: Today is Foolish day. 

MR. LONELY: Ah. You cheated on me. 

KITTY: Hehe... 

MR. LONELY: You are a naughty girl. 

KITTY: :D 

In her mind, what she said it's both lie and truth. But she knew his answer that time.  

Time passed. Then she didn't think of him much. Suddenly, one day he said that he broke up with his girlfriend. He was sad so much. It's enough for her to see how much he loves his girlfriend. She didn't know what and how to help him. She was really confused. It's a mess in her mind. She was so selfish. She didn't want him to talk about his girlfriend. He said that he won't repeat talking about his girlfriend with her. And she didn't say anything because she wanted to be like that. But she felt sorry a bit. Who is she? How could she forbid him to talk about his girlfriend? What does she know about love? How could she tell him not to be sad? She smiled at herself with a semi-smile. 

By the time she already was freedom from her school, she went online and hoped to see him. But no way, it's by day. She checked emails after a long time since she even hasn't opened her email inbox. There were some new emails. By looking over the list, at last she got it, his name. She hurriedly clicked on it. A letter with beautiful background appeared. 

Hi 

I will miss u  

Your brother, 

Tess (his real name) 

It's the all contents of a letter. It just came from 2 days before. She wondered why he'd sent that email to her. Did he really miss her? She almost went online every all day but not in the evening. She knew that it's impossible to meet him without online in the evening. But she has no way. Some days went by; at last she could go online in the evening. It's 7 p.m. She signed in. There are only 2 friends online and they are not him. It's 8 p.m. From Yahoo: "Kaka just logged in". She almost looked at Yahoo alerts so long that everyone went online or offline she almost knew. From Yahoo: "Chen just logged out". Suddenly, her eyes opened as large as possible when she noticed on Yahoo news: "Updated: MR. LONELY: on business trip". Now she could answer every question by herself. That why he left her that email, that why he didn't online these day. She sometimes went online next days. But there was no one to chat. She was so bored and then she wrote down Yahoo status a sentence, which she likes to write as well as read when she goes online: Suddenly, I miss you. Next day as usual she went online. From Yahoo: "Offline message: MR. LONELY: Suddenly, you miss me?". Oh my God. He was so overconfident. How could he think that she missed him? Did he think she has no one to miss? But any way it's the truth she really has no one to miss except him. She missed him it's the truth too. She said and smiled at herself. But she mischievously sent him an offline message: "No". It's clear as day she missed him but she didn't want to recognize to him. Perhaps she is Asian girl. Thus, when she said like that it means in contrast, but he isn't Asian boy so how can he understand it. 

Next night, from Yahoo: "Offline message: MR. LONELY: Ah". He was being online. She started a conversation. 

KITTY: Hi 

MR. LONELY: Hi 

KITTY: How are you? 

MR. LONELY: I'm ok. And you? 

KITTY: Me too. Thanks 

MR. LONELY: :D No problem 

KITTY: I should 

(Silence) 

KITTY: How's your trip? 

MR. LONELY: It's normal 

KITTY: Is it funny? 

She was waiting but what she received was only silence. For a while, then she depressingly went offline. 

Next night,  

MR. LONELY: Sorry for last night, I was busy. 

KITTY: No problem. 

She wanted to tell him why he didn't say that he was busy last night. By this time, she would let him with his work, it's ok and she wouldn't bother him. Why did he let her wait for him so long? She still got angry with him but she didn't tell him her mind. 

MR. LONELY: Thanks. 

... 

MR. LONELY: How are you? 

KITTY: I'm ok. Thanks. And you? 

MR. LONELY: I'm fine. Thanks. 

... 

MR. LONELY: I missed you. 

KITTY: Thanks 

MR. LONELY: :D You don't need to thank for this. 

KITTY: I should 

MR. LONELY: It's ok 

(Silence) 

MR. LONELY: What are you doing? 

KITTY: I'm just chatting with friends 

... 

KITTY: And you? Why haven't you slept yet? 

She was waiting in silence. No answer. She thought he probably was busy again. She hated this situation. Why didn't he tell her? Why did he always let her wait like this? She hates it, hates him. She went offline. 

Next morning, from Yahoo: "Offline message: MR. LONELY: Sorry I fell asleep". She quietly went offline. 

She is sitting here now, holding a wine glass. She feels her summer days are really sad and boring. She feels that their relationship is not good as the beginning. There is seemed a distance between them. She still goes online but not too often. She doesn't know how he is because she rarely sees him on Yahoo. When she is chatting with him she doesn't know what to say and she knows him too. He no longer calls her "sister" or "baby". She doesn't call him "brother" either. She doesn't know where their relationship will be. She is thinking about far-sighted of an ending which has happened with her before. 

The man whom she called brother left her without a reason. Up to now, she doesn't still know. She doesn't want to know now. She was sad because of him. She was sad when she looked at the sunset. She was pain when she walked in the rain. She shed tears when she recalled memories about him.  

For a long time, she has been like that. She is being happy with this new brother now. But life is not too easy with her. She knows that this feeling is different with the ex brother. That she loves it. She also knows if everything still goes on like this, the ending will be not more different than the last one. She needs to say something but what and how? 

Put the glass on the table. She takes her mobile and log in Yahoo. 

MR. LONELY: Hi 

KITTY: Hi 

MR. LONELY: How are you? 

KITTY: I'm ok. And you? 

MR. LONELY: I'm fine. Thanks 

... 

MR. LONELY: What are you doing? 

KITTY: Nothing. I'm lying on bed 

MR. LONELY: :D 

... 

KITTY: Are you very busy lately? 

MR. LONELY: Yea... 

KITTY: I see 

MR. LONELY: But I will online every night. Don't worry. 

KITTY: It's up to you. I don't worry anything 

MR. LONELY: Ok. :D 

Why could she say that? It's clearly in her mind that she worried every time she doesn't see him. She really doesn't understand herself. 

Next nights, she still goes online very often but he didn't be here. She perhaps has no chance to tell him from the bottom of her heart...

End of this chapter.