Chapter 36: Love & Suckers

The letter burned like coal in my hands, searing hot as if it was scarring my skin and calling attention to itself as I clutched onto it for dear life. Half out of dread, half out of worry that it would slip through my fingertips and someone else would find it. Despite the more rational part of my brain, I had managed to come up with some form of a letter and was prepared to present it.

I made my way through the hallways with it clutched in my palm. The hallways. Crowded, fluffed, strung, painted -- no matter what form they could be described, they were everywhere: hearts. Red ones, pink ones, white ones, yellow ones.

For some reason, everyone had decked the area in festive decor to symbolize the daunting holiday for love.

As people walked past me, their eyes would travel from my face down to the dark red letter I kept in my tight grasp. They all noticed it, it wasn't hard to see. To me, the letter was so embarrassing that I held it out at least ten inches from my body. Subconsciously, I probably figured the less it was touching me, the more people would think I was only a messenger or something.

"Why does it look like you're holding a Howler?" A voice whispered in my ear, making me jump ten feet in the air and elbow the person in the nose as a reflex.

Spinning around, I put a hand over my frantic heartbeat and breathed a sigh of relief, realizing it was only George.

"Don't scare me like that!" I scolded and leaned against the stone wall of the corridor, chest pounding as if I'd run a mile. A pair of Hufflepuffs paused at the scene before shuffling off.

George just raised a brow while holding his throbbing nose, as if saying 'Seriously?' "Well, something's got your kettle boiling," he laughed, scratching at the back of his neck. "Something to do with this?" He teased, snatching the scarlet envelope from my hand with a devious smirk.

George gave it a fake pondering look, twisting it betwixt his thumb and forefingers like a detective with a clue. "Hum... I wonder who this is for..." He flipped it around twice, looking for a name but there wasn't one to be found. "Too bad there's no name on the cover; guess I need to open it for myself!"

"No!" I yelled, snatching it out of his hands and cradling it against my chest like an abducted child. "It's... it's personal..."

"Alright Granger, calm down." George chuckled and rolled his eyes. "Besides, it's not like I don't know who you're planning on presenting that to. The whole school can see it you know."

My face burst into a hot pink flame. I swallowed the rush from my tongue as it fought to tell a joke to relieve the tension that no one but me felt. "What? It's not that --"

"--Obvious Granger?" A cold sneer rang out from the side of me, bouncing from the glossy stone corridor walls and churning George's casually happy smile to something reminiscent of an icebox glare. I turned my head slightly to take in the towering figure of Draco, standing arms crossed across his chest.

"Yes, actually, you are. That letter is clearly for one of the many Weasels, but I don't know why. They're annoying blood traitors," he spat, giving George a look over. Then gave me a softer look, confusing me a little. "You'd do better to aim your sights on someone of proper status. Perhaps Diggory, or an exchange student visiting this year."

I was conflicted. Like I always was when it came to Draco. He always said the weirdest things that would flatter me and piss me off at the same time. "Look, Draco... Urr- thank you for that, but shut the hell up about the blood traitor thing. There is honestly no such thing." I stressed the words, staring down his turned-up, pompous nose. I tried to make it make sense to him, watching George shift beside me.

"Blood is an object. It can't be 'betrayed'. Now, piss off." I smiled and Draco scowled at me rolling his eyes and muttering 'Mud-blood' under his breath.

I waved him off and smirked. "Love you too!"

George grunted as Draco's figure retreated into the descending stairwell, leading to the bowels of the Castle and out of our line of sight. He placed a hand on top of my head, ruffling up my curly hair. "Look, Elle. I hate that guy; you shouldn't hang around him too much."

"Who? Draco? He's harmless." I snorted and pulled away from his brotherly gesture with a smirk. "You want some churros?"

✧

"I can't believe you've never had a churro before?!" I wailed, smacking George over the head with a smirk. He faked pain as I grabbed two churros off the plate I'd made in the Kitchen. They'd let me cook whatever I wanted as long as I told them what I needed for ingredients.

George rubbed his head and gave me a chuckle. "No? Sorry - but I haven't the faintest idea what that is - I'll try it I guess."

"Yeah, you will!" I snorted and took a huge bite from mine. It was warm and crunchy, and the sweet scent made my nervous wreck of a brain calm down a little. I offered him the other. "Tak' a bi'e," I said as cinnamon and sugar fell from my lips.

George winced in slight disgust at me talking with my mouth full but grabbed the toasty churro. "Right. I'll try it, but I don't understand the big de--" He took a bite and stopped mid-sentence. "Er Mer Gerdoc. These er bujm."

"What?" I snickered, not being able to understand him while munching on the delicious dessert called a churro.

George brushed the side of his mouth with his dress robe sleeve. "Blimey, L, I didn't know you could bake."

"You never asked," I said.

"You need to make these for Seamus's party!" George grinned, taking another bite. "Where'd you learn to cook?"

"I just... bake when I've got a lot on my mind." I pinched off more of my churro, rolling the fried dough between my fingertips as I tried to force the embarrassment away. "It helps me, well, clear my head."

I inhaled slowly through my nose, letting my mind wander to Fred. His mischievous attitude, the way he grinned and constantly hassled me. The way the corners of his eyes crinkled when he laughed, the glint of humour in his eyes. I flushed pink and turned my attention away once more.

The House-elves ears perked up a little. "Party? We can make churros for Master Weasley and Mistress Granger! It would be our pleasure."

"Seriously?" I bent down to Dobby's level as he hobble up excitedly. "You guys are awesome."

"It's just what we house-elves do Miss Granger." Dobby smiled, and tugged on one of his multiple hats resting on his head. "Now Dobby just gets paid for it."

My sister's campaign crossed my mind, and I tried to make a mental note to ask her if she needed any help with S.P.E.W.

George grabbed two more churros and stuffed them in his pockets as we walked out of the house-elf kitchens. I had a churro hanging from my lips as a couple of girlish giggles rang out from behind me.

"I know right?! I hope he'll ask me out today! He keeps giving me these looks you know --"

I turned around and came face-to-neck with non-other than Angelina Johnson. I hate being short.

Standing next to her was nervous looking Katie Bell intertwining her fingers together and untwining them over and over. Suddenly I had the feeling I'd over heard something pertaining to me. "Hey guys!" George grinned giving the girls a wave, trying to ease the sudden tension.

"Hey George... Elizabeth," Angelina said looking down at me with a civil smile. She was trying to be nice, which was a good thing, so I could only be nice towards her in return even though things were still awkward since the Yule Ball... with me stealing her date and everything.

Katie's eyes sparkled happily and she turned to George, pulling her thick brown braid over her shoulder and nervously toying with the curly ends.

"So George, who's your Valentine?" George scratched his head and opened his mouth to reply. While the pair chatted between themselves, Angelina tapped me lightly on my shoulder with an embarrassed smile, whispering in my ear: "Could we speak privately for a spell?"

Cocking my head to the side, I gave her a nervous smile, stomach dropping as if I was in big trouble. "Uhm.. yeah of course." Angelina smile nicely and lead me down the corridor and took a right into an abandoned classroom (for some reason there was many abandoned classrooms at Hogwarts). George's eyes followed me and he made a move to come along when I waved him off, showing him it was a civil conversation.

Angelina sat on a stool and pulled up a chair for me as well, tangling her fingers and chewing the bottom of her lip.

For a moment, I watched her features. Angelina was a pretty girl, dark and toned with a kickass attitude and had a wicked mind for Quidditch. Her almond eyes were framed with thick, black lashes that curled effortlessly, and her wide mouth was plump and downturned.

I brushed at the dusting of cinnamon sugar on my cheek, feeling less than as I sat on the chair across from her, head low.

As soon as my bottom touched wood, she exploded her thoughts out on me.

"Look - Elizabeth -"

I quickly interrupted her, cringing at my formal name. "-Elle or Eliza is fine," I blurted. I bit my tongue at that moment, knowing that Eliza wasn't fine. I just allowed Blake to call me that, but I was too nervous to correct myself now.

Her mouth parted for a second and she looked back down at her hands with a flush on her cheeks. "Okay, Elle then." She inhaled sharply and started again, as if she'd practised what she was going to say.

"Look, Elle. It's been bothering me, and I just want to be transparent. I like Fred. I like Fred a lot. He's just - He's just -"

She threw her hands up into the air and I wanted to give her a word like: superfluous, eccentric, crazy, twat; but I knew that she just needed to get something off her chest - and my interrupting wouldn't help at all.

"He's just Fred. I'm practically in love with the guy, you know?" She chuckled as a small blush crept over her face.

Love. The word echoed through my chest, but she kept speaking at the speed of light before I could even really think about it.

"Of course, I can't be sure about that yet, but here's the thing, Elle. You are a cool girl; honestly, I really like you, you're not fake." Her face contorted a little and she glared at her hands once more. "And that must be against the rules of feminism or something because I've never heard of two girls liking the same guy and getting along just fine."

She paused, looking up at me with her deer-brown eyes, making me feel guilty as if I was the cause for Fred possibly liking me more. Which wasn't a proven fact.

My mind reeled, the filtered dim lighting of the classroom enwrapped the two of us as I tried to piece together a coherent response. "I like you too, Angelina - really - I'ven't any hard feelings towards you," I added in, feeling as if she was waiting for me to confirm something she didn't know. She smiled and took another deep breath, preparing herself for more talking and feeling sharing.

My fight or flight response echoed through my eardrums, rising with my pulse. It was so uncomfortable, I had to dig my heels behind the legs of my chair to keep me in place.

"I know I gave you a reason to dislike me - especially the night of the dance, I was kind of a, well, I wasn't as kind as I could've been..."

I opened my mouth to object, but she raised her hand, so I only shook my head 'no'. "Please, I just need to get this out, because you need to understand something." I folded my hands politely, feeling my stomach clench and twist nervously, she was beginning to freak me out a little.

"You see, I like Fred a lot and I'm not about to just roll over and let a new 'trophy' from America steal him away. Sorry for the objective terms, but I have heard that used about you and your friends."

I felt my rage starting to build up, did she think she could say she 'likes' me and then diss me?

"I'm a fighter, Elle. And I'm not going to stop pursuing Fred just because you think you may have a slight upper hand. I'll fight you down to tooth and nail if I had to. But that's not a problem because you don't have the upper hand - I do. There are things Fred and I know about each other, bonds that we have between us, that you'll never have between the both of you. I've known him since we'd both started at Hogwarts, and you only just arrived. And when he grows old of his toys, he comes to me - because I'm one of his closest friends."

Toy, trophy, worthless. All these things she'd called me from her and others' perspectives. "What are you," I began, feeling my heart starting to rip a little. I let my voice fade into nothing, not finding the words.

I never really cared how others viewed me, but she was Angelina. Fred's mate... I mean, at the end of the day, she did know him better than I did. And, as I picked at my fingernails feeling my chest swell, how was I to be sure he didn't actually see me that way? 'Maybe he really did see me as those things.'

Angelina offered me a pitying look, feeling real sadness for the words leaving her mouth. "I'm really sorry, Elle. I don't mean to say these things to hurt you. Honestly, I truly just want to warn you. Fred... he's really very oblivious when it comes to romance and 'long-term' flings. Don't think you're special, because even I thought I was special."

I blinked slowly up at her, brow furrowed and mouth hard pressed.

"You're younger, you have so many things going for you, don't get hung up on this one guy."

My eyes began to water a little as I jumped out of my seat, toppling the chair to the ground. "I'm sorry Angelina. But, I - I need to go."

Despite the dim lighting of the room, she could see the hurt she'd brought on me. I could feel the letter I'd written burning a hole in my back pocket. I swallowed the threat of tears as I rushed towards the door.

"Elle, wait. I don't mean it like that! It came out wrong -" She stood up, one arm wrapped around her torso with a frown as she reached out towards me.

I ignored her completely, unsure of what she wanted from me. Flinging the door open, I tumbled out of the room and took off down the hall. I could hear her voice call out towards me while George tried to catch up, asking what was wrong.

"I just need to think by myself please!" I yelled harshly, voice sounding thicker than syrup.

✧

"Elle? Elle." Jenna called, seeing me laying face down on my bed, curled in a ball and tuned out from the world around me.

"Leave me alone," I muttered into my pillow. The words were so muffled that I doubted my friend could hear them. The soft downy caressed my cheeks and soothed my tumultuous mind. I slipped my eyes shut and inhaled the lavender fabric.

"Elle, what's the matter? The party is in less than an hour! You've to get ready." Jenna sounded as if she wanted to sing for joy. "If you get up, I'll give you some choooccoolllaattee."

I rolled over angrily giving her the look of death. Her pale hands pointed towards the little Mount Everest of sweets piled atop her mattress like a magician showing off a magnificent trick.

"It looks like Halloween came early this year..." I laid on my back, telling her with a dead-panned voice.

"It DID!" She cheered and jumped into the pile of sweets with childish giggles. "Flirting is the best. This is one of the biggest hauls ever!" Her head popped up from under her sweets and she grinned at me. "Have you seen the loot Lana got? Man, she knows how to flaunt her stuff. And, have you seen the table in the Common Room yet?"

Jenna's eyes sparkled happily like a child on Christmas morning. She was referring to the small collection of Valentines that had been placed on the coffee table for me. Hoping I would accept them with grins and giggles like my friends, but I wasn't in the mood.

"Yeah, that's only because we're trophies," I muttered, flipping over and facing the wall of my four-poster bed.

"T-Trophy? Huh? What are you talking about, silly?" Jenna frowned and climbed off her mountain and into my bed. "What's got you down on Valentine's Day? It's the day of looove."

"Angelina Johnson." I sneered. "She's killed me -- with kindness." I wanted to creep back into the bed that Jenna had begun dragging me out of.

"Kills with kindness? What did she say exactly?" Lana said with a mouth full of Twix bars. Her favorite. In her arms was a large burlap sack filled with chocolates and sweets of all kinds. Making me feel sick all over again.

I gave them both a weary look and shook my head. "Aren't you at all concerned about getting poisoned? What if your candy is spiked with something?"

"Then I trust you," Lana paused to defiantly bite into a chocolate heart with a wink, "to make me a potion and save my life." Jenna snickered as Lana swallowed and rubbed a hand over her belly. "Man, I'm gonna gain ten pounds like last year." She remorsed, giving the chocolate a hateful look, but slowly bringing it back up to her lips and taking a gleeful bite. "So, what did this girl say to you?"

Sighing, I sat up and retold everything Angelina had spat at me out of concern. It only took a matter of minutes, but I had to say it again over and over because Lana couldn't believe it the first two times. "You're telling me she said this to you? What the ... She... Are you sure she wasn't trying to pull that whole 'two-faced' greater motive girl trick?"

I just shook my head, not believing there could be anything greater than what she'd already said she wanted. "She wanted Fred. And she was going to get him. That's pretty much the message behind the whole thing. That and, she liked me but wanted me to know the truth."

Jenna frowned a little and sighed, biting into a liquorice stick. Lana however, was not as easily pleased. "That sneaky twat!" She jumped off her mattress and paced around the floorboards. My eyes wandered towards the scarlet valentine sitting innocently on my nightstand, slightly crumpled and looking as defeated as I felt.

Lana's red hair swayed at her shoulders as she quickly turned to me, eyes alight with a flame I hadn't seen since Jenna was bullied in our first year. I furrowed my brow and pulled my knees to my chest as she pointed a finger in my face.

"You can't just roll over," Lana said with an absolute air, "you need to fight back too, Elizabeth Granger! ARE YOU A MAN OR A MOUSE?"

"I'm a woman."

"Say it louder! What are you?!" Lana grinned placing her hands on top of my shoulders, enthusiastically.

"I'm a woman!" I chuckled, not really understanding why this was important.

"Again!"

"I'm a WOMAN!" I yelled with a giggle shaking my head while Jenna cat-called, twirling licquorice in the air like a lasso.

"EXACTLY AND HOW DO WOMEN FIGHT?!" Lana smirked and gave me a wicked look.

"They fight.... ?"

"Dirty."

✧

So here I was, at the party. Envelope in hand, and boobs on display -- much to my own distaste. Lana said I needed to 'flaunt' my assets, and it would be fine since it was only Valentine's Day. The dress she forced me into was 'classy' but low cut and pretty much put my chest front and centre. Black velvet and tight, the thing was pulled out of Lana's short supply of dresses.

This was Lana's idea of 'fighting' against Angelina, but honestly, I felt like a fish out of water.

Clutched in my hand was the letter I'd slaved over all night, even if things didn't go well tonight, I'd still give this to him. I needed to get everything off my chest.

I set the platter of churros down on one of the tables, thankful that the House Elves had made something. The majority of the party was only beverages and candy.

"Bloody Hell, Elle." Ron passed me, pale in the face, averting his eyes any where but at me plunging neckline - it didn't look too immodest, but Ron was the only one making a huge deal. He went and grabbed a punch, handing me one. "You look.. nice."

"Thank you, Ronald," I smirked, sipping from the obviously alcohol-spiked punch. "Have you seen Fred? I need to talk to him."

Ron shook his head and looked around the cluttered room already filled with rambunctious teenagers. "No, I just got here, erh -- 'Mione may know! She's over there with the Ravenclaws." He pointed across the room towards Hermione who was practically still in her dress robes. She was shifting, uncomfortable, as she stood in the midst of the room.

I could tell that my sister was eyeing the scene with worry, making me wonder why she even showed up in the first place. After all, she hated doing anything that would risk her Hogwarts reputation.

"Hermione!" I called, getting her attention. She smiled and waved me over, taking a calculated, drawn-out ponder over what I was wearing.

"You look... lovely."

Beside her Cho Change smiled, adorned in a lovely silver dress with her hair braided back in a loose crown. "Hello, Elle. Long time no see."

"Nice to see you too, Cho!" I said, looking around the room. "Is Cedric here? How've you two been getting on?" I teased, though only partly participating in the conversation as my eyes rolled over the room, searing for one redhead in particular.

Cho scoffed and shook her head, "Certainly not. Cedric's a Prefect," she reminded me. "I invited him, but he said he'd rather train for the next challenge anyway. Less conflict of interest, he said."

"Right," I trailed off. I collected the attention of the rest of the Ravenclaws and my sister as I scratched at the back of my head, musing my curls. "Hey, have any of you seen Fred Weasley?"

Hermione and the Ravenclaws shook their heads, saying no, until one of them cocked their heads to the side, looking past me. "There he is - he just walked into the back room with a girl."

My spine straightened as I tried to see where the girl was pointing, but was too short to see over Dean Thomas' shoulders. "What girl?" I frantically asked, feeling the ticking of time. Was I too late? "Was it Ang --"

"-gelina." The Ravenclaw finished with a nod. "Yeah, she looked pretty nervous too. Wonder what is up."

Turning on a heel, I followed the trail leading to the storage room, shoving my way through the sea of celebrating teens with slight annoyance. I just needed to speak to him. Before, well, before Angelina could really.

Music and laughter filled the air, and the yeasty stench of alcohol wasn't too well hidden. It was sort of nice, and surprising in its own way, to see people from all four houses coming together for a secret party. Sometimes, the houses seemed so divided.

"Elle!!!" Blake sang in my ear, twirling me around on the dance floor. I fought hard to keep my eyes on the door but as Blake swung me around, it was difficult. "Hey! Where've you been hiding? I love your dress by the way!"

I smiled a little, trying to be nice, but also trying to edge my way around her. "Hey Blake, thank you - Lana let me borrow it. Look, I need to find Fred real quick, but I promise to talk to you later, kay?" Blake gave me a quizzical brow then looked at the letter in my hand.

"Ohhh, awe! Tell me how it goes!" She cheered, but didn't let go of me right away. "Promise?"

"Promise." I sighed and crossed my heart. Then, I walked out of her grasp and shuffled more through the crowds, trying to get to Fred and Angelina.

Once I reached the tall wooden door, however, I found I couldn't bring myself to open it. My hand clasped the iron lever, and I paused with a pit in my stomach. I didn't want to know, I didn't want to see.

The only thing that was behind there was something heart wrecking and ignorance was bliss. Hyping myself up, I realized that it was either now or never, I had to do this.

Taking a deep breath, I lightly pushed open the door to see Fred with his arm around Angelina's waist in a friendly gesture, the thought made me smile a little in relief, yet as I opened my mouth to make myself known - Angelina leaned up on her tip-toes, wrapping her arms around Fred's neck and kissed him passionately.

Embarrassed, I bowed my head and turned to leave, accidentally crashing into a shelf I hadn't seen before and knocking over a bucket. It clattered to the ground and caused Angelina to release Fred's shocked face.

My throat felt dry as I just stared at the mess I'd made and then the couple in front of me. I opened my mouth, but only tiny rasps of air would make their way out. Fred's face was one of utter shock and confinement. "Elle?"

I opened my mouth then closed it repeatedly, like a fish out of water. Gathering my tiny shreds of dignity, I cleared my throat and blinked away the sudden water in my eyes, and walked up to Fred with a humble smile. "I know it doesn't matter any more, but here." I lifted the letter and placed it on the desk they were leaning on, between him and Angelina. "I'm sorry..." My voice was high pitched and horrid sounding to my own ears. "I'll give you two privacy now." I said, bowing my head, glaring down at my heels as if they were the most interesting thing in the world.

Fred reached out for me as I walked towards the door, opening it. "Elle - what... No, it's not like that - please, let me explain."

"It's okay Fred." I chuckled, rolling my eyes. I just needed out of that room, and fast.

Fred stepped away from Angelina and make his way over to me, but I bolted from the room and slammed the door shut, sealing them inside. Nothing he could say would make it feel any better.

As I met with the pounding music and thrill outside that terrible room, I was faced with two options: Go home and mope around, or party until I couldn't even remember what had just happened.

I chose the later.

________

*it's spelt latter, but I didn't wanna break the comment chain lmao

Sneak Peek: Guess - Who will Elle wake up next to in the morning?

a) Jenna? b) Lana, c) Draco, d) Cedric, e) Harry(scandal?!), f) RON?! or G) Ginny?

Rewrite A/N :

Ooof, what's gonna happen now?