⊹ ࣪ ˖ gfx by eidclons .ᐟ.ᐟ

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Homebound Heart is best viewed in
smallest font size & Hoefler Text / TNR.
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I. Codex Bellunensis, 1400 ╱ II. Paul Revere, Noah Kahan ╱ III. The Patience Stone (2012) dir. Atiq Rahimi ╱ IV. Writer in the Dark, Lorde ╱ V. Emma. (2020) dir. Autumn de Wilde ╱ VI. The Reynolds Pamphlet from Hamilton, Lin-Manuel Miranda ╱ VII. Anatomy of a Hug, Luna Lu ╱ VIII. Students from The Other Lover, Bruce Smith ╱ IX. Howl's Moving Castle (2004) dir. Hayao Miyazaki ╱ X. Circe, Madeline Miller ╱ XI. Silsila (1981) dir. Yash Chopra ╱ XII. How'd Your Parents Die Again?, Fatimah Asghar.

He was another knife, I could feel it. A different sort, but a knife still. I did not care. I thought: give me the blade. Some things are worth spilling blood for.

Madeline Miller 𓇽 Circe

A TRIPTYCH FOR THE
NAMELESS FLOWERS.

               I. Pluck a flower from its home, plant it on foreign soil.

Milla is a flower birthed by Naboo's earth. Her name finds its crawling roots in the famous Millaflower, a flower blessed with ruby-red petals and enchanting fragrance found in the rich valleys of Naboo. So it is true that Milla is birthed by Naboo, not only by soil through the flower, but by blood through her mother. She is an extension of this sun-bathed heaven. She once resided in the womb of Naboo. She arrived in its arms, nursed and embraced by Naboo. But in Milla's scarlet heart, Naboo is not called Naboo. Naboo is Miteia Janren. To the subjects of Naboo, she is Queen Jamillia. To Milla, she is just Mama.

And Milla, petals and all, reaches for the sky. You are here. The Naboo sun whispers gold through her milk-bones like a sunblossom enraptured by the golden bead in the sky. She thrives in this way: green fingers with earth underneath her nails, sitting in her small greenhouse world, the Naboo sun rays penetrating her deep bronze skin, she is laughing and smiling amongst the millaflowers and the mintris. She loves this heaven. Her palms face the sun, waiting for the tendrils of light to intertwine with her tiny fingers. And I will never leave.

Blossoming child, sun-kissed flower, blossoming flower, sun-kissed child: this is Naboo's ode to the ever-blooming and day-drenched Milla.

Kassa is a flower that withered on Kenari. Heart rot clang to his interior—devouring his flesh, he is a fungus' feast—and ate away at his petals, his stem, his roots. You are nothing, nothing, nothing. The Kenari breeze sings this to him at night, the trees uttering green eulogies as his leaves fall one by one. In the poisoned forest planet he finds himself in, an arboretum of the same heart rot-infested plants is where he finds his refuge. A tribe bound by orphanhood, children of the Kenari forests, this is Kassa's family now. With his little sister's hand in his, he survives for her. And that's what he has always done. Even through his last festering petal. For Kerri.

And Kassa, leaves and all, falls to the ground. Though by some cosmic miracle, Kassa always rises. Knees bloodied and hands soiled, his eyes always defy the Kenari sun, fighting it, taunting it, threatening it. Can you kill a planet? Kassa already had his answers: the Republic did (look at this poisoned earth) and the Empire could (it could poison it further). But can I kill it? He looks at the Kenari sun and his eyes burn. He loves Kenari, but he supposes that it never found the heart to love him back. He loves Kenari and he wants to kill it. To put it out of its misery?

War child, war torn flower, war flower, war torn child: this is Kenari's elegy to still-living but all-dead Kassa.

By some game of fate, Milla and Kassa are plucked from their earths. Ode and elegy are sung in one despondent voice. The Naboo flower flails and cries for her home. She is extracted mercilessly, violently, against all her wishes. But the Kenari flower lets the planet hurl him out, unfailing and accepting. They find themselves at the bosoms of women ready to plant them on foreign soil. Their roots are exposed, clinging onto nothing.

Decay is imminent.

(But perhaps hope conquers decay this time around.)

               II. Rechristen its petals and its thorns.

Meelei Anthé Organa is a garden. A daughter of Alderaan. She has been cradled by Alderaan's frost-forged land since she was but a child. But after basking in the warm Naboo light, of eyes so used to golden domes and vine-twisted windows, is Alderaan—a world of snow-capped mountains, of gentle blue breeze, of sleek white structures—truly a home?

Queen Breha Organa decides: Yes, she is home with us. At just seven years young, through the kindness of Breha Organa's heart, Milla becomes Princess Meelei Organa. The Flower of Alderaan. Meelei Anthé Organa. Every ear on Alderaan knows this name by heart, except her own.

Meelei Organa struggles to know what she is, who she is. Is she Princess Meelei: Alderaan's rose, elder princess of Alderaan, half of the Organas' pride, heiress to the throne, the rose hidden amongst blankets of snow? Is she Doctor Organa: Alderaan's healing hands, the erudite royal, master mender, the warm human hands amongst the sea of cold alloy-forged droid palms? Or is she Mei: Alderaan's child, the dutiful daughter, the sensible sister, the faithful friend?

Meelei Organa is a garden of names, yet it is a shame that all flowers unfurl beautifully but remain obscure.

Cassian Jeron Andor is a grave. A son of Ferrix. Cradled by rust-colored soil and a dryness that went well with his hollow heart. The vast abundance of Kenari's forests matches Ferrix's vast abundance of nothingness, bar the clanking of metals, the rust that ate away at his tools, the noise of Kerri's absence, and the unusual warmth of his new home.

Maarva Andor makes sure that he feels this warmth. Modest their shelter may be, their origins humble, their food middling, but their home is warm. And this home calls him Cassian, and he lets it.

Cassian is what he calls himself, too, and that is what the rest of the galaxy calls him now. The records show it—forged, yes—but that is him now. But tomorrow he is Clem, the next he is Keef, the day after he is Fulcrum. Fugitive. Identity borrowed. Spy. Name buried. Rebel. Self discarded. Cassian has been everything but is still nothing.

Cassian Andor is a grave of his discarded selves, and the name on the tombstone changes every day.

               III. Watch the flower: will it unfurl or decay?

Do gardens not turn into graveyards when they are left to die? Do the weeds not kill the flowers and have their decayed petals absorbed by the dead dirt?

Does Meelei Organa—the most beautiful flower of all, each petal dew-fresh and each leaf verdant green—know she is supposed to be dead? Does she know the taste of the iron of her own blood, the vitreous tearing of her flesh, and the rotting of her own petals? Does she, healer of wounds, know that she cannot heal her own?

(Does the garden know it is turning into a graveyard?)

And do graveyards not turn into gardens when they are forsaken? Do flowers and plants not sprout from the rain-watered soil in between the decaying ribcage of the dead?

Does Cassian Andor—the most rotten flower of all, each petal fungi-spoilt and each leaf festering brown—know he deserves salvation even if his hands are stained with blood? Does he know that, in the midst of a war amongst the stars, he will restore hope? Does he, ender of lives, know that he will save?

(Does the graveyard know it is turning into a garden?)

But the dying and the dead are the same, anyway. Gardens are graveyards and graveyards are gardens. Beautiful yet rotten, rotten yet beautiful.

This is Meelei and Cassian: Still-dying and already-dead nameless flowers dying on foreign soils.

Decay is here.

(But perhaps love conquers decay this time around.)

SHE:     GIVE ME YOUR HAND.

Simone Ashley as
MEELEI ANTHÉ ORGANA   ╱  MILLA.
☆ ━━ Daughter of Alderaan,  born 26 BBY.

&&&.

Diego Luna as
CASSIAN JERON ANDOR   ╱  KASSA.
★ ━━ Son of Ferrix,  born 33 BBY.

HE:     I'LL STAIN YOU.

𓇉
PLAYLISTS!
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scan  codes  to  listen  on  spotify!

✶
AGE OF THE REPUBLIC.
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DESIDERIUM
eirlys sideri  x  anakin skywalker

METANOIA
dyana ma'hin  x  padmé naberrie

FATEBOUND FRAGMENTS
prequel to homebound heart

✷
AGE OF THE REBELLION.
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⋆ HOMEBOUND HEART ⋆
meelei organa  x cassian andor

SPECTRE
eilian sideri  x  qimir / the stranger

SKYFALL
chani naberrie  x jyn erso
levi naberrie  x harp allor

✸
AGE OF THE RESISTANCE.
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SUPERNOVA GIRL
amity holdo  x poe dameron

LADY VENGEANCE
serzi veprel  x rey of jakku

STARBOUND SOULS
sequel to homebound heart.

𓇼 CONNECTED WITH . . .
IN TWILIGHT BORN SERIES.

✷

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DEDICATIONS.
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binarysun ✴︎ mandalhoerian ✴︎ eidclons ✴︎saturnsokas ✴︎ -undomiels ✴︎ crystallous ✴︎ poesdamerons- ✴︎ artificixl ✴︎ romanoIogy ✴︎ nightwvngs ✴︎ courscants ✴︎ CassideeMickaelson ✴︎ anakingrey ✴︎ spacekenobi ✴︎ miravetsera

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TRIGGER WARNINGS.
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Please be advised that Homebound Heart may contain themes and content that may be distressing or triggering for some individuals. Specific content warnings include, but are not limited to: adult language, sexual themes, graphic violence, gore, medical & body horror, ableism, character death(s), warfare & genocide, mental illness, and the use of naturopathy & herbal medicine. Hence, this may not be suitable for all audiences. Viewer and reader discretion is advised. Please take care of yourself! ♡

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DISCLAIMER.
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Homebound Heart is a work of fanfiction based on the Star Wars universe, which is the intellectual property of Lucasfilm Ltd. and the Walt Disney Company. I do not own any rights to the Star Wars characters, settings, or other related elements. All Star Wars canon content belongs to its respective copyright holders, and this work is created solely for entertainment and non-commercial purposes.

However, Homebound Heart also includes original characters, settings, concepts, and storylines created by me. These original ideas are my intellectual property (unless stated otherwise), and I retain full rights over them. Any unauthorized reproduction, distribution, or use of my original content, is strictly prohibited.

Please respect the creative effort that has gone into this work and refrain from stealing or using my original ideas without permission. I do not take this lightly, and any plagiarizer will be dealt with. ☺︎

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LEY'S NOTE!
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pretty please read it even if it's long as hell ...
it's worth it i promise i just a got a lil excited!

🥀 guess who's back... BOO 🍅🍅🍅 after two years of inactivity, Homebound Heart is finally back again with a LOT of changes (good ones i swear)! but before we get into that, i want to say that it feels so so so good to be back again! i missed writing (this book especially) so much, and it really sucks that my heart was in the wrong place back then—writing for the sake of reads and votes, for the "popularity" and the validation was toxicity-overload for me, and it poisoned my love for writing and made me stop for a while. this entire validation and popularity thing got into my head in the process of doing something that i should be doing for love and enjoyment, and i got involved with a bunch of people who fed this toxic hunger. this ultimately led to me not finding the love i had for writing for a very long time. but thank God i decided to remove myself from that negative space and did a lot of reflection and rediscovery. after two years of dormancy, i'm proud to say that i've grown both as a person and as a writer, and i'm even prouder to be doing this for love and nothing else. 🤍 SO WITH THAT... let's get into the good stuff! 🙂‍↕️

🥀 WHAT'S NEW!? well... a lot of things 🧍🏻‍♀️ let's start with the most obvious one... the faceclaim change! during my time away i got into the bridgerton rabbit hole and had a 💡 moment when i saw simone ashley grace my screen. she's #the meelei organa i've envisioned in my head since 2020 fr. and i'm so happy i've made this change because she's so perfect for meelei! second is literally #everything 🙏🏻 i've also changed meelei's birthyear! last time, she was born in 22 BBY, but now she's born in 26 BBY—this is to make up for the retconning of cassian's age as well. that said, meelei is seven years older than leia now. i've changed a lot of plot points too, especially cassian's origins bc we have the andor show now. prior to that, i was making shit up fr and was getting every single cassian andor backstory crumb in the rogue one novelization, rogue one visual dictionary, and other connections found in the legends universe 😭 i was so down bad for this man it's embarrassing. i also changed lots of the imagery... before i was very into the sun and moon, water and fire, winter and spring imageries but flowers and nature now play a big(ger) part in meelei's characterization, so now i'm going to play with a lot of that imagery, as seen in the intro! 🪷 long story short, there are a LOT of new things to look out for!

🥀     Homebound Heart will be ignoring and completely changing some canon stuff because i genuinely dgaf  🤷🏻‍♀️ for one, leia will be adopted by the organas in 18 BBY instead of 19 BBY... the reason for that will be discussed more extensively in my anakin fic, but it will be mentioned once in a while here. she's still born in 19 BBY, and it's not a huge change anyway and it barely affects the entire story of star wars. second, queen breha will not be having pulmonodes. in the book Leia, Princess of Alderaan says she had her lungs and heart replaced with pulmonodes, and that's why she chose not to bear a child, but in Homebound Heart, i want to explore women's reproductive health and the issues that come with it. (i also have another reason for that, but i'll keep quiet for now 🤫) third, queen jamillia will be playing a larger role in the star wars universe (see the next section of this author's note). there are a lot more instances of canon divergence in this fic because i hate star wars ❤️ so watch out for those!

🥀     as always, Homebound Heart will be heavily oc-centric because i love meelei organa and she is my baby. for the new readers, meelei is pronounced as Mee-Lay (lay as in laying down)! she's undergone a lot of growth as a character and i'm so very proud of what i've come up with her. as usual, meelei is still the organa family's adopted daughter and leia's older sister. meelei was adopted before leia this time, and she was adopted in 19 BBY, while leia was adopted in 18 BBY. if it wasn't obvious enough, she's also now queen jamillia's biological daughter! 🤭 this is the best change i've done with meelei, and i'm so excited to make queen jamillia a unique character. she's so much more than a naboo queen in this universe; her non-regnal, birth name is miteia janren, and she's darred janren's sister and sola naberrie's sister-in-law... which makes ryoo and pooja naberrie meelei's biological cousins... but i digress 🤓 with that, i'll explore more of her (and meelei's dad 🤫) more extensively in Fatebound Fragments, Homebound Heart's prequel!

🥀 meelei organa is very loosely inspired by Winter Celchu, a star wars character in legends who was also adopted by the organas. meelei is also inspired by a lot of my favorite people, both fictional and real such as: Diana, Princess of Wales, Melchora "Tandang Sora" Aquino, Trinidad Tecson, Fa Mulan from Mulan (1998), Kate Sharma from Bridgerton, Sophie Hatter from Howl's Moving Castle (2004), Elinor Dashwood from Sense & Sensibility (1995), Jane Bennet from Pride & Prejudice (2005), Meg March from Little Women (2019), and Elsa from Frozen (2013), and Rahul Raichand from Kabhi Khushi Kabhie Gham (2001) ... basically, meelei has the Elder Sibling Syndrome 💀 but regardless of all the names mentioned, meelei will still be a unique character! [this is getting a little too long yikes]

🥀     [i'm almost done i swear] and of course, Alderaan is still a huge part of this book. i've made Alderaan almost my own planet, as i've made extensive historical and cultural backgrounds for Alderaan. i developed languages, traditions, cultural practices, and geographical features for Alderaan that are inspired by Asian culture, mostly Filipino (my culture). i've also tried my best to incorporate Indian culture and traditions in this book as well, especially in Naboo and a certain continent in Alderaan, to pay homage to my faceclaim's ethnicity (and i'm also particularly interested in Indian culture because of my growing love for Bollywood movies!). more Alderaan information and lore will be made available in a separate chapter so watch out for that as well! i love Alderaan with all of my heart, and i will be fiercely protective of the original ideas i have for it, so please don't steal! 🙏🏻

🥀     girl i got carried away my bad 😖 before i end this, i just want to say a big big big thanks to all of you, especially to the ones who have supported Homebound Heart since 2020, more especially to anj, my partner in crime and my big sister, who has been there for me for six years and has never once doubted me and my abilities; to shai, for being one of the most talented writers i've known, for finding it in your heart to remain friends, and for always supporting me and my ideas; to deunan, who has the biggest and kindest heart i've known, for always being the big sister to all of us and for being one of my biggest supporters since day one; to hope, who has been supporting me and hh for a long time despite the things that went down, for being one of the people who supported my return and for being such a good friend; and to bowie, for being one of hh's biggest supporters since day one, for the comments you leave and the love you give hh, they truly keep me going! and to you, my readers! i love you all and thank you all so much for sticking by me and reading my silly little stories.

🥀     thank you all for reading this (long ass) note, and i hope you enjoy Homebound Heart!

✷   HOMEBOUND HEART .  .  .
first published in  ╱  january 2020
republished in  ╱  november 2024