"bel-esprit [bel-es-pree]"

—

(noun) A French loanword, bel-esprit is characterised as a person with beautiful intellect. They are witty, cultured, and gifted, due to this reason, a bel-esprit is usually found engaging in witty banter.Their possession of a fine mind indicates that their beauty radiates from their natural sense of mental intuition and vivaciousness.

literally: fine wit/mind

  ❄❄❄❄   

"Analeigh! Focus! What's up with you today?" 

I snap out of my thoughts and look at Sofia who's scowling at me, having a stern look on her face. 

"Sorry," I mumble, embarrassed that she caught me yet again. 

I have alone session with her today and it seems that I just can't focus on skating. Sofia is frustrated with me, and frankly, so am I. I can't afford to have my thoughts elsewhere. I need my mind sharp and my moves perfect. 

"The competition is in a little more than 2 months. You can't afford to be sloppy." I nod my head seriously. I get where she's coming from and I understand she wants me to know my moves to a perfection. I want to know that I gave it all, too. 

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I'll get my head in the game, I promise," I tell Sofia, taking a deep breath. Truthfully, I can't think about anything else than Zach. And that promised night tomorrow night which I'm looking forward to. I can't wait to see what he's got prepared for us. 

Him calling me last night didn't help at all. It's actually worse for me and my poor mind. That's why Sofia thinks I've got such poor skating skills because I keep tripping on the ice today whenever I remember anything about Zach. 

"Analeigh! This is going nowhere, we can't work like that today."

I give Sofia my most guilty expression, asking her for forgiveness with my round eyes. 

I'll pick you up at 9 and we can go to dinner.

I stare down at the text and bite my lip. 

What's the dress code for tonight?

I'm kind of afraid of what he's going to say. Because if I'll have to wear something fancy, I'll have to disappoint him, maybe even tell him that I can't go. My closet doesn't hold anything fancy. In fact, my closet screams These clothes are so terrible they make me jealous of what hobos are wearing because they have a way better style. 

Anything you're comfortable in ;) 

I was also kind of afraid he'd say this. Does he even know what I'm comfortable in?

Old sweatpants and a shirt three sizes too big?

I have to chuckle at that. What a pair we're going to make wherever we're going. Even though Zach dresses casually, he's still going to wear clothes that are worth more than everything I own. 

And I'm here yet again creating differences between us because of the money. And then I remember that if it doesn't bother Zach that I don't have any money, and he's got more than enough, and he still chooses to be seen with me, why should I bother with it? 

If he said he doesn't want to see me ever again, I'd understand. But now he's actually doing things to see me even more and I'm ruining this with my thinking. Maybe I should really enjoy what life sends me and stop doubting it.

But it's kind of hard when life doesn't usually send me anything good. 

You can even come naked if you want and you'd make me a very happy man.

I stare at his message and then laugh at it. 

I'll stick with my option. 

Bummer. 

I hold the phone to my chest and bite my lip, squealing out. Since I woke up today, I've started thinking about tonight. I never plan on what I'm going to wear anywhere, never even think about it. Probably because I never go anywhere, but still. Sweatpants are my option no matter where I go. In fact, I don't even think I own a pair of jeans. 

I take a long shower today, experimenting with shampoos so I smell good. I shave everywhere and I'm blushing when I'm just thinking why am I doing it. Just in case, I tell myself. 

I don't remember when was the last time I spent this much time on myself to make myself look somehow pretty. Looking down at my hair ends, I realise I could go visit a hairdresser in a short time. I make a face and drop the hair back down. 

I pluck my eyebrows - it was a time to do that. I make a homemade mask for my face and put it on, leaving it to do its magic so the skin comes out really soft and fresh. 

Some people's definition of spoiling themselves is wasting money, my definition of spoiling myself is to just spend a whole day making myself feel good without even having to leave the house.

I'll have to go without makeup since I don't even own any. I could probably find a mascara lying somewhere in my room, but I'm pretty sure it's already dry and not for use anymore. 

I brush my hair that falls down to my middle back in waves because I let it dry naturally. I chose my favourite sweatpants from my closet and put on a shirt that actually fit me. I was overall ... cute. Definitely not even close to sexy or attractive, I more look cute than anything else.

I sigh. Well, I can't really help with that since the innocence is written all over my face. And who even cares if I look more cute than sexy? It's not like I'm going out with Zach to impress him. I know that I can't be a woman who could impress Zach Crawford. He's surrounded by beautiful women everywhere he appears. And I don't fit into that category and I most definitely not stand out. 

Besides, this is Zach. He's already seen me plenty of times and I hope he doesn't expect me to create some magic that will suddenly make me gorgeous. 

Zach is in front of my house at exactly 9 pm. I don't wait for him to come get me, I rather come to him. Well, we meet halfway because locking the house takes me some seconds and gives Zach the time to get out of his car. I see he's wearing a scowl on his handsome face. "You won't let me do this in a traditional way, I see," he greets me.

I raise my eyebrows. "Oh? You've already got a traditional way when picking up girls?" I jokingly ask him.

"No! I meant it in that traditional way when a guy is required to come to the house with flowers, ring the bell and deal with her father before taking her out." 

I have to laugh at that. "Oh, God," I breathe, still chuckling. "I don't see any flowers. And don't worry, you won't have to deal with any father. Besides, I think those things only happen in movies. Or in high school."

Zach eyes the house behind me now and then looks back at me. I'm happy to see he's wearing faded jeans that have obviously been worn too many times and an old shirt. I wonder if he did that so I wouldn't feel underdressed. Either way, I'm happy he's not wearing anything fancier.

Zach exhales, long and hard. "It seems like you won't let me do anything traditional with you." 

I cock my head to the side. "For example?" 

Zach shakes his head and grins. "I'll tell you in the morning. Let's go now before the food gets too cold. I'm glad you took the jacket, the temperature can get really low at night." 

Zach starts walking towards his car that's standing out on this poor street. "Where are we going?" I ask him, walking behind.

"Thought I would cook something for us at my place. You liked it there the last time, didn't you?" Zach wonders.

We're going back to his place? I loved his place! Even though I can't help but think that it's going to feel really intimate, being alone with him there. Him and the view. I can't wait to see it again. "That sounds good. I don't like eating in restaurants, anyway." 

Zach flashes me a grin. "That's good to know." He opens the door for me and steps to the side, acting like a true gentleman. "Here you go, ma'am." I give him a funny look. "This is the first time you're letting me open the door for you, let me have my fun." 

I roll my eyes and sit into his extravagant, spotlessly clean car with a chuckle. Zach joins me seconds later, starting the car, turning the heat on and turning the soft music on the radio a bit down. 

"So, how was your day?" Zach asks, trying to make a small conversation. 

I look down at my hands and smile. I don't think he wants to hear how I've been preparing myself the whole day for this night to happen, anticipating it and thinking about different things that are going to happen, ending up with none in the end. I really had no idea where he's taking me or what we're going to do. "Pretty boring, actually. I'd rather not even talk about it since I didn't do anything interesting. Was your day more interesting than mine, though?" 

Zach shakes his head in laughter. "Everything you do interests me, Ana." I look at him. Not just because of what he said, but because it's the first time he called me with that name. Zach notices me looking and he turns his head, looking at me, too. "What?" he wants to know. 

"It's the first time you called me by that name."

Zach frowns as if he didn't even realise it. As if it came to him naturally. "You don't like it?" he asks.

"Well ... no one besides Miles calls me that. But I like it, though." I chuckle uncomfortably, getting the bitter taste in my mouth whenever I think of Miles. His words truly hurt and I'm not going to make the first move. I want his apology. 

Zach nods. "Good," he comments. "You and Miles ... have you been friends for a long time?" 

"Yeah. We have. For years. I really love him," I tell Zach easily, not even thinking my words through. 

Zach sharply turns his head. "As in ... romantically?" 

My eyes widen a bit. "No! God, no, it's not like that. I love him as a friend." 

Zach nods in understanding. "No other love interest?" Zach asks, trying to make his voice sound light, even smiling a bit, although I can hear he's asking it seriously. 

Love interest? Can I say you?  "No, I guess not. Not right now," I tell him, biting my lip and turning my head so that I'm looking forward now. "What about you, Crawford?" I turn the topic about him. 

Zach eyes me and gives me a charming smile. "Love interest? There ... might be one," he says, still smiling.

"Oh?" I say curiously, trying to get rid of the sting that was caused by his words. 

Zach looks at me. "Yeah, we'll see how it will turn out." He gives me such a meaningful, deep stare that I have to blush. 

The rest of the drive passes quickly with some shared laughter between us. Even though I don't know where Zach is planning to take me tonight, I'm excited about it because I know I'll have a great time. It's kind of hard not to have a great time with him.

We go to his flat (after he insisted on opening the door for me) and have a home-cooked dinner (which he claimed he made himself) with a view of the whole city before us and the aroma of lit candles around us, giving the place a romantic touch. 

It's nice. The food is also good. And Zach is really nice, like a true gentleman. I wouldn't expect anything less. Well, most of the time at least. He's funny, he's charming and this - everything - is almost too good to be true. 

"Are you going to tell me now what are we going to do?" I ask him when our dinner comes to an end. 

Zach stares at me for some long moments before his face breaks out into a smile. "We are going to act like tourists tonight and visit all the New York famous sights." 

I cock my head to the side, wondering how he came up with that idea. Not that I don't like it - I love it, in fact.

"Since you're always so busy with your life and it seems like you never have time for anything, I thought that maybe you would like to visit a few places."

I nod. "That's a wonderful idea, actually. But we could also do that in daylight." 

Zach shrugs, giving me a secretive smile. "You'll soon find out why I chose to do this at night." He winks at me and I divert my gaze down at the table, trying not to blush for some reason. His stare is always making me so nervous. It's like he's trying to look at the depths of my soul and find out my secrets. 

Zach doesn't bother with cleaning - he says he's got a housekeeper for that - and we leave after that. He doesn't tell me where he's taking me, but I shouldn't be surprised when I notice we've arrived at the Empire State Building. 

It's true that I've seen this building hundred of times, but I've never been inside. Zach takes me in it. It's not that many people here at this late hour and I think that makes it even more magical. Especially when we come to the top and ... the New York is suddenly under me and around me in all its night's glory.

I stare at it with open mouth, drinking in the sight. "Wow," I breathe out at the magic before my eyes. I knew New York as a city was beautiful, but this is a whole new level. 

Zach is standing beside me with his hands in his pockets, grinning at me. "I told you, flower." 

I can't take my gaze off the magical sight. We stay here for quite a long time, not talking much, just appreciating the view in front of us. 

We take a walk to the Chinatown next, walking close together and enjoying it with big smiles on our faces. It's a cold night, but I don't feel it at all. 

When we pass the famous Rockefeller Center, he tells me he's going to take me skating here one time, but not today since he doesn't want to spend his time on the skates - surprisingly. 

After that, we make a small break and go get something to eat in a 24-hour opened takeout restaurant.

After, we go to the Museum of the City of New York, which should be closed to visitors at this hour, but Zach said he called in some favours and we're basically walking through it alone. We spend quite some time there, both enjoying different art displayed before our eyes, commenting on a few pieces.

He also takes me to a casino I didn't catch the name of, teaching me how to gamble. I had a lot of fun in there and Zach and I were both laughing loud, just enjoying it. When we came out of it, it was already a bit lighter outside, but not quite a day yet. 

We headed home, both of us tired and swimming in euphoria. Zach takes us to his place and we both up curl on the couch, warming up by the fireplace and enjoying the view - the New York waking up. Although it never really went to sleep, after all. 

Zach offers to make us a hot chocolate and I absolutely accept the offer. I don't know when was the last time I had a hot chocolate. 

"You know, this night wasn't only to tire you with sightseeing, it was also to get to know you better ..." I see there's something on his mind. "I've been wondering a lot. You haven't bought yourself any new, fancy clothes, you haven't bought a new car ... what did you spend your money on? Are you in any kind of trouble, Ana?" 

This is the topic I most feared to talk about but I know it's kind of a necessary to do if I want Zach to stay in my life. 

Here goes nothing. "It's for my ... mother." 

Thank you so much for bringing this story to #196 in romance!! That's huge. 

Also, this story is getting completed on radish so ... you'll soon be able to read the whole story on there :) 

Have a nice day!! x 

Connect with me:

radish: bourbonvanilla

twitter: patriciaxbooks

ask.fm: bourbonvanilla