I'm Rie, an interviewer from CLN, aka the Crazy Late Nighters. Please give a short introduction.

Uhm . . . Well . . . I am Jessie, an old soul locked in a young body. I have loved reading since a young age and started writing only a few years ago.

It's great to meet you, Jessie! Your amazing book won first place. Can you tell us something about your book? P.S- we don't give spoilers!

Nice to meet you, too! Hahaha, ~ Uhm… My book is named Lypophrenia, which means "a sudden wave of sadness without a cause…" The idea was like a light for me to get through and I never expected anyone to really like it. I noted the book under fanfiction as that's where it all started. I belong to a fandom that captured my heart, and without them I would have never come so far - the book plot, characters and settings are all mine, but the inspiration came from the fandom who supported me through everything, oftentimes when I tried to quit the book. And yeah… I guess that's how my story developed, but still I feel like it's a dream… A too good to be real dream ^^

That was something very real. It was like I could even feel it. How were you inspired to write this book?

Uhm… It was definitely my fandom; the drama and my book are two different things but if one looks closely, the moral stays the same - it's all about a slice of life. What's meant to come will come and what's meant to stay will stay and what's meant to go will go.  No matter how much time will pass, if two things are meant to be together, they will find their way. The drama and my fandom really gave me the idea, along with the hard time of darkness I went through, and I mixed it with the truth of life.  Every story I write has a bit of truth from reality mixed with fantasy, so my inspiration was my fandom, life and everything with it!

That was really heartfelt. You and your story are like soulmates. What does writing for you mean?

Hehe. My life; it's a way to express the words my heart can't say out loud…

I can relate. Sometimes silence is the best answer. For your story, can you explain what genre you used? Also, how did you think of that particular genre with the characters?

Indeed. Hahaha, actually, I never had a genre in mind. I had no idea what I was doing at all, I was just going with the flow and seeing where my story would take me. The only thing I knew was that it would fall under fanfiction/lgbtq.  Although it doesn't fall 100% under fanfiction, everything in the book belongs to me except for the use of names I chose as they're real people.

I really love how you decided to let the story flow by itself! How did you know this book was the one?

Hehe, actually, I didn't, I was kinda forced by my friends to participate in some awards as they've had my back since the beginning and they know I am not confident about anything I write. They wanted to give me courage and 'forced' me to participate in some, and I think I always had a deep connection with my book as it's a piece that reminds me that every dark period will end. When the storm doesn't want to pass, we should learn how to dance in the rain, right? That's what my books represent for me.

That force really was required for such a great book to shine! As you said, you wrote this book when you were vulnerable, were there some difficulties that you faced during writing?

Yeah, and I will forever be grateful to my friends. Oh, sure, I think every writer has this phase in which they're vulnerable - it's that moment you’re writing and you know your feelings are flooding down the paper, and it's scary as you don't know what people will think, yet youŕe determined. One of my difficulties was, especially, my confidence as I had times I wanted to quit the book or delete it itself, which I (luckily) didn't do because of my proofreaders and friends who kept supporting me no matter what… But I think every writer needs to hear this: throw out all the advice out of the window - character development? Grammar? Plot? Throw it all in the bin and just sit down and write because a real writer knows it isn't the struggle to write, but to find the courage and sit down to write. Don't care about what others think, don't care about the plot, grammar, development or whatever else, it comes later, just work it out. There should always be a first draft.

You really are a true writer Jessie, I can feel it! Moving on to the character, you mentioned they were taken from a drama. What more did you add of yourself in those characters?

Awhh, thank you so much!! Almost everything in small bits, like their pain, their emotions, their habits, as I think a character is more real when the reader can connect with them, so oftentimes I made myself stand in the same position and think about what I would do, and then reflect that back on to my characters in their own way. I think writing was a way for me, like an escape mechanism, and my characters were a part of me, and they will always remain.

The connection between you and your characters really feels awesome! Everyone has favorites. Which character did you love the most and why?

Thank you! Oh, you're challenging me with this question! Uhm . . . I think I loved Xiao Zhan, but I also think he reflected me during the period I wrote the book. The character I admired was Yibo, the person I was desperately wishing for during that period. It's hard for me to say who I like more as they're both a part of me. They both have their flaws, but are heroes in my eyes. I don't think I can choose between them because one wouldn't be themself without the other hehe.

This is such a smart answer. I too, believe that they both would be incomplete without the other! Were there moments when you were doubtful about this book? For example: whether it would please the audience or not?

^^ Aiyaaa, of course there were, every author must have had the feeling while writing. 'Will my audience like it?' and 'Will they find it worth a shot?' And so on.  So did I during writing, but now, when I look back, I don't think it should've mattered.  Writing is a passion in which the author tells you their story, their pain, their tears in a different way. Some will like it, some won't, but there will always be someone who will like it and someone who won't, so why worry so much about the results? As long as you thrive in what you do and do your best, you will see the result someday. Whether it's a day or a year, you'll see. This is what I always remind myself of when I start a new book, 'If one reader is ready to read it and wants to know the end, I'll continue.’ Like I said, what comes will come, so why worry too much?

That's the fighting spirit of a writer! As an LGBTQIAP+ writer, what aspects did you take into consideration while writing?

Uhm . . . I actually didn't really consider anything during writing as the setting I chose was a small village and my characters are quite young in the beginning, so people in the village would expect them to just be close friends, of course. I hadn't thought much about their development and let it go with the flow, as I think a love story between two men shouldn't be different from a female and a male, it's only the view some people still have towards LGBTQIAP+.

I totally agree, LGBTQIAP+ is about love after all! Whether loving someone else or loving yourself! As the plot unraveled itself while you were writing, were there moments when you wanted to quit?

Oh, of course, there were many, many, many times as I felt discouraged and felt like my work wasn't good enough and stuff like that - it was mainly because I had no one to really help me at the time. After every chapter I was confused as to what I was even doing or why I was even continuing, but my heart felt at peace when I wrote, so I continued, and I am happy I did!

I'm grateful that you never gave up, otherwise such a great gem could've never reached us! As a writer, plagiarism is a known topic. How do you deal with that topic?

Awhh, thank you!! Uhm . . . I actually haven't dealt with plagiarism up till now. A week ago there was this site which copied my books, but that was quickly solved as the site was deleted.

I'm happy to know that the issue was solved! How did you think of Wattpad as the medium for your book? There are quite some other means too, so why Wattpad?

I was a rookie at the time and I didn't even know my way around the other sites, so Wattpad became my settlement. I also started writing on AO3 these days because I feel safer there, as weird as it sounds. Many books and some accounts from friends of mine, who never did anything against the rules of Wattpad, were deleted. That was one of the reasons I started on AO3, it’s like a back-up account for if it would happen to me, but I still do enjoy using Wattpad very much

Wattpad sure was your first home for writing then! Writers on Wattpad can really get affected by views or hate comments and it is human nature to do so. No one can help feeling down when they are given hate for no reason. Did you have an experience like that? If yes, how did you deal with it?

I haven't had any hate to any of my books actually, though there was this one occasion where a person did say to me that LGBTQIAP+ is a chronic disorder.  I argued with this person, but in the end I stopped as there is no way you can win from someone who had a mindset like that.

People like that are everywhere. One should try to educate them, but sometimes those people just don't want to accept that they are in the wrong. How many books have you written til’ now? And which of your works is your favorite?

Uhm... I have quite a lot of works, but lemme count… 12 works and 3 more offline books I am working on. From all these I think Lypophrenia and My Dear Nightmare are my favourite so far.

You sure adore Lypophrenia, or at least I can assume from your answers, but what is special about My Dear Nightmare? Please let our readers know!

Hmmm, My Dear Nightmare is the total opposite of Lypophrenia - it's angst, romance and some funny moments combined in which I tell the story of the dangers of using sleeping pills. It's basically a person who receives an anonymous bottle of sleeping pills and, during his vulnerable state, he takes one and discovers another world during his sleep, which carries some wicked dark magic… I suck at description which can be clearly seen back in my blurb hehe XD

I really love how you described it though! Whenever you write a story, what is your initial thought before starting it?

Thank you! Nothing, I just start and see where it'll end. My inspiration is always something small from reality because I'm the kind of writer who does not writing about world wars; I'm writing about the lost kid in the supermarket, writing about something many can oftentimes connect to, and around that idea I make it bigger. While I write the puzzle pieces will appear and fall together themselves ig>

That is one of the best approaches I've ever come across! As a writer, peace of mind and patience are important. How do you balance that?

Awhh, thank you so much! Not hahaha~ I mean, I write whenever I can, but I think a routine works better than writing whenever I have ideas because if that were the case I would have never finished a book. I think the question could be better directed to my proofreader, who oftentimes would go crazy over my slow updates, while I just enjoyed writing whenever I could.

Being your proofreader must be a delightful task, after all, you get to read it first! Do you have an updating schedule or routine?

Pfttt, they need to have patience, too, and much of it XD.  No, I just write whenever I have the time for it

That's great. Going with the flow is for sure the best method! For the last question, what would you like to say for all those writers out there struggling to make their book the next hot topic?

True! Don't worry, someday, someone will read it, love it and think about it; any book you read at the right age won't quite leave the reader, whether they remember what the book was about or by whom it was written, it'll leave a footstep in their heart. Don't think about success, but just work hard. You'll always get what you deserve but don't give up hope because hope can go a long way and it'll lead us through the dark.

A true writer really has great words of advice! Thanks a lot for your time and patience Jessi. I really loved interviewing you.

Thank you so much for your time and patience, too!

Author : -DreamingFirefly-
Interviewer : _busystackingguap
Interview Editor : MicroscopicLlama