hello everyone!

today  i wanted to share half of the first chapter of my original vampire/werewolf novel, the hunted along with a book cover that I made! I'd love to get some feedback on this, and I feel that if I get some good feedback or people become excited, I might become more motivated to write (which I would like)

so, if you don't know, the hunted is about a vampire/werewolf hunter named arden winters, who's on the hunt for her younger brother who was taken from her by vampires. And yes, there will be a love interest, but I can give too many things away or it might spoil it!

but if you don't know the main character, she is played by the beautiful marie avgeropoulos!

anyways, here's the book cover:

i'm really happy with this because i actually made the manip!! I know it's not the best, and this cover will not be the official cover (gonna need someone to do that for me because I want it to like bomb af) but i'm quite proud of myself. I know it seems like her eyes are glowing as if she's a supernatural creature, but I assure you that she's not and I just did that to make them stand out. Like i said, this isn't the official cover and the manip isn't the best, but i'd say it's pretty good!!

i'd love to hear your honest feedback (remember: there is a difference between insulting someone and giving constructive criticism) about the first half of the first chapter, so here it !!

  I wasn't always like this. Not at first. Before, I depended on the shadows to aid me in my hunt. Now, I depended on alcohol.

   A bell rings above my head as I shove open the bar door, the heavy smell of liquor and cigarette smoke trailing into my nose. Eyes from every angle of the bar land on me, but I shrug them off as I walk up to the bar counter. "What can I get for you, little lady?" The bartender asks, forcing a toothless smile. My ID comes quickly out of my wallet and I nod to behind him.

   "Whiskey, on the rocks," I grumble. He glances down at the card on the counter, and picks it up, examining the girl in the picture. He looks back at me, observing my features. The piercing gray eyes catch him off guard, and I flash a grin.

  "Arden?" He asks, unsure if I was lying or not. I bow my head, and he hands me back my ID. The plastic card is shoved back into my destroyed wallet and thrown into my jacket. He pours the golden liquid into a glass and drops four ice cubes into it, the ice cracking as it makes contact with the drink. I gladly take it and drink, the smokey flavour numbing my senses. The odd sound of the bell reverberates through my ears and I look up to see a handsome man walk in.

   His eyes are dark blue, but I can see behind the color. Blue layers his animalistic golden eyes, making him prepared to lure in prey. His intoxicating smell overwhelms me, but it no longer has the effect on me like it used to. My eyes travel down his collarbones, and I find myself wondering if he has a helios tattoo. The man takes a seat at a table with a blonde girl in a skimpy black dress. His eyes dance across her body and he swipes his tongue over his regular canines. I can almost picture his fangs sliding out of his gums.

   He doesn't notice me, and I gladly take the advantage as I guzzle down more of my drink. A light haze settles over me, but I push it aside as I watch the man attempt to flirt with the blonde. She gladly accepts his invitation, grateful for the company. She doesn't know that she's letting in a monster. The counter digs into my shoulder blades as I lean against it, the metal of my stake quietly clicking on the wood. The metal rubs into my my scarred skin, but the tip does not scratch it. As I adjust my weight I feel the stake move with me, as if we were one whole.

     The man places his hand on her upper thigh, and her muscles tense, but she does not push him away. He moves closer and whispers something into her ear and she gives a small nod. Before I can even order a second drink, the two stand up and make their way out the back door. I throw a ten on the counter and pull up my hair into a ponytail, not caring about the pieces that weren't co-operating. The elastic slaps against my brown hair and I step away from the counter, unwillingly leaving my drink behind. It's like I can hear the bottles of whiskey whispering my name. Arden, come back. Ignoring my desperate thirst for alcohol, I walk out through the front door again and the bell chimes. The shadows blend with my black clothes, concealing me in the night. As I round the bar corner, I can hear the man's honey voice, his lips fluttering against her neck and his voice producing sweet lies.

  "I'm not going to hurt you," he lies, kissing the bottom of her jaw. "I'm just going to kill you." I hear her whimper as he gets closer to her neck. My fingers tighten around the cool metal of my stake, and I walk out of my hiding place. He hears the noise and turns around from the girl, glaring right at me. I can see his luminescent golden eyes flicker in the dark as he produces a threatening growl.

"A hunter," he purrs, taking a step closer to me. "I've always wanted to know what a hunter tastes like."

  "Not today, jackass," I snap. He bolts towards me, and I cross my arms as he appears in front of me with vampire speed. I cross my forearms before my neck just as he tries to sink his teeth into my veins. My foot snaps from it's original position, shoving the man away from my neck. He stumbles from the sudden strength, and I stroll forwards, slashing my weapon. The man dodges my first few blows, but my fourth one hits him straight in the neck.

  He howls in pain and wraps his hands around my arms, throwing me across the alley. My back collides with the ground and a rough grunt comes from my mouth. The man pulls my stake out of his neck and drops it, the metal scratching against the concrete. He stands above me and I attempt to stand up, but he just laughs and kicks me to the ground again. The heel of his boot targets my mouth, causing the metallic taste of blood to cloud my senses.

  "Are you done, hunter?" He places a boot on my chest, the concrete opening it's arms to me once again. Pain echoes in various places in my body, but that doesn't stop me from struggling under his weight. My lungs gasp for breath as he pushes down more, my breath inaudible in the quiet night.

  "Watch your back," I breathe out, a smirk hardening on my bleeding lips. Just as he turns around, the blonde uses her high heel and whacks him against the jaw. It's not enough to kill him, or even wound him, but it gives me a distraction. My body musters the strength to roll out of his shadow, and I leap up, trying to locate my stake. A glint of silver catches my eye and I race towards it, just as the man pushes the blonde to the ground. The stake effortlessly rolls into my palm, and I turn around, getting ready to deliver the final blow. Anger fuels his actions, making him clumsy and unprepared. When the moment is right, I thrust the stake into his chest and slide it under his ribs where the point stabs his heart. The gold from his eyes dissipates and he crashes to the ground with a heavy thud.

  I quickly retrieve my bloodied stake and shove it back into my jacket, relieved to have it's presence. I watch the blonde stand up and sashay towards me as I spit out a mouthful of blood.

"What did I tell you about interfering Ivy?" I hiss through my clenched teeth.

Ivy rolls her arctic blue eyes and tugs the skimpy dress down to reach her knees. "That you can handle yourself and I'm supposed to stick to being the bait?"

"Exactly."

"Didn't seem like you had it handled." Ivy shoots back, a triumphant smile on her younger face.

"Enough, Ivy. Now help me drag this body to the dumpster so we can head back to the motel. I could really use another drink," I sigh and she laughs.

there you go! like i said, this is only the first part of the chapter, but I wanted to post it before i wrote the rest of it. i'm really excited to write my own, action packed book and I'm hoping that I'l consider posting it this summer!!

if you are confused about something, I will gladly elaborate (except on a few things like the helios tattoo and who the love interest will be ((you can ask who might play him (;))) 

i know this will probably one of the questions, so i'm going to answer it now:

Ivy is Arden's "partner" (i say that loosely because Arden does everything herself) and she acts as the bait in many of their hunts. she's also played by ginny gardener and yes, she is younger than arden, who is 21! (:

i'm going to tag a few people who i'd love to get feedback from (oh dear i am sorry, i'm just so excited??? i cannot contain it i'm sorry cx) 

stickitstilinski LotteHolder Bella_A_Bancroft voidmoriarty molliest and onederstruck-

thank you all for reading, and I can't wait to hear your guys's input!<3