NAMJOON
UN speaker actually
sounds really cool

Y/N
dude i wont be surprised
if you wished to be a leader
of some idol group

Y/N
like i can see myself decorating
my room with your posters and
making a whole ass body pillow
of u

Y/N
sorry mayhaps i went too
far

NAMJOON
Idol group...
I can't even hahaha

NAMJOON
thank you for cheering me up

Y/N
your smile told the sun
to suck on its dick

Y/N
cause it's so gorgeous

Y/N
so tell me sir what do you
write

NAMJOON
Novels actually
I haven’t published anything
which isn't a big surprise

Y/N
no
the fact that you aint
south Korea's president is
a surprise so obviously it is

NAMJOON
You flatter me

NAMJOON
I just took the path that seemed
easier as with my results I could
become a teacher in no time
but being a writer would mean
choosing a harsher path that
might not give me any success

NAMJOON
Now that I'm here anyway I've
realized there is no shortcut to
happiness since I'm not happy in
my current situation either

Y/N
it's like abandoning the pirate ship
bc it's easier to be a citizen only
to miss the adventures of the sea

NAMJOON
A grandiose example but yes
it's exactly like that

Y/N
i was watching pirates of the
Caribbean

Y/N
you can still be a writer too
right?

NAMJOON
I thought so but it's hard to
juggle between a job and what
it seems a hobby

NAMJOON
I try to get some writing done on
holidays but I'm either too tired
or have to go over exam papers
of my students

NAMJOON
I just write for myself now
sometimes

NAMJOON
And I wish things could be different
but I know I wouldn't be happier
if I'd chosen to live a poor life
with uncertainty

NAMJOON
Or maybe I would have

Y/N
what do you do when you feel
like that

NAMJOON
I tell myself there should be no
regrets to life and only lessons

NAMJOON
I ask myself where can I go from
here

NAMJOON
And if I find myself in the dark I
assure myself that okay maybe
I can think about it later just
living and Being is hard too so
focus on that

Y/N
talking to you is really
therapeutic

Y/N
bro you bring out a side of
me i didn’t know existed

NAMJOON
You’ve always been you
You just can't see that for
yourself or so I think

Y/N
i dont know
so what are you writing now

Y/N
wait dont tell me if you dont
want to

NAMJOON
It's about a guy who knew
exactly where he was going when
he was in his teen years

NAMJOON
But as he becomes an adult he
realizes his life is becoming a
plethora of broken relationships,
impulsive travelling to different
cities and countries, random
friendships with people that
never last

NAMJOON
So he begins from the scratch
right back at his home
but it's hard there too because
he doesn’t really like what he
has become

NAMJOON
In fact he hates himself
he tries to get past his dark
shadows and remove its
wings from himself but it
does not work

NAMJOON
Because every time he looks
at his reflection that failure of
his face is looking back at himself

NAMJOON
"I wish I could love myself"

Y/N
that hits home

Y/N
way too close to home

NAMJOON
Why?

Y/N
sorry i cant tell you that now

NAMJOON
It's okay

Y/N
so what happens to the guy?

Y/N
i hope he doesnt kill himself
or something cause that will
be a stab to my heart

NAMJOON
He realizes that to to live
you have to love yourself

NAMJOON
And to love yourself you have to
accept everything about yourself
even your dark shadows

Y/N
but that's really hard right

NAMJOON
It is
The novel is huge and it
has three parts

NAMJOON
Her, tear and answer
how do they sound?

Y/N
man even your brain wrinkles
are sexy

Y/N
I WANT TO KISS YOUR BRAIN
HOW COULD YOU COME UP
WITH THAT

Y/N
i really wanna read the whole
thing and it's coming from an
ignorant bitch like me

NAMJOON
It's not wholly my idea
I was inspired by the philosophies
of Carl Jung

Y/N
damn who that

NAMJOON
Swiss psychiatrist
I love his books

Y/N
for the past five years
i've only been reading
and supporting online freelancing
writers who speak a voice into
the lgbtq community

NAMJOON
That's amazing

Y/N
in short i read gay smut on
wattpad

NAMJOON
I'm not judging

Y/N
i know you wont

Y/N
you have to publish that book
someday no matter how long
it takes

Y/N
you can be 70 year old writer
who just debuted and i'll still
show up in the book signing event

Y/N
with my cane and broken back
and arthritis

NAMJOON
It's hard to stay motivated

NAMJOON
There's so many responsibilities
with being an adult

NAMJOON
I wish there was a neverland

NAMJOON
I didn’t need to spend my whole
life there but maybe a few years
just so the adulting process is
slow and I get more time to have
fun while thinking about my
future simultaneously

Y/N
yeah one day youre 18 and
suddenly youre an adult
it sounds crazy

Y/N
i cant chose which pizza topping
i want how do i make life decisions

Y/N
i ask myself how was everything
so fun before i was 11 lmao

Y/N
we are all professor snapes now
just getting by with a bitch face

NAMJOON
When we are young we just
can't wait to become older
because things are supposed to
get easier

Y/N
except it's not

NAMJOON
Yes as soon as you reach adulthood
it's already a letdown

Y/N
you're like fuck no get back
this aint the upgrade i wanted

Y/N
honestly to me you sound like
an wholesome adult

Y/N
like i'd want to be someone
like you and trust me i barely
see people as my idol

NAMJOON
Do you?

NAMJOON
You make me feel special

Y/N
sorry i just had to sing twice

NAMJOON
Sing it louder so I can hear it
from here and fall asleep to your
voice

Y/N

Y/N
LET. ME. BREATH

Y/N
if i sing loud even the demons
under my bed will beg for mercy

NAMJOON
I believe you have a lovely voice

NAMJOON
You keep undermining yourself

NAMJOON
It's pretty amazing talking to
someone so late at night

Y/N
yeah everyone is extra vulnerable
at 3 a.m

NAMJOON
Is that why you stay awake?

Y/N
nah i dont even talk to anyone
i just dont have a sleep pattern
it's a lifestyle on drugs without
the drugs

NAMJOON
But talking to you about my deepest
insecurities in the dark of my room
feels quite magical

NAMJOON
Thank you for listening to me 💙

Y/N
nah

Y/N
you healed a part of my rotten
soul without even realising

━━━━━━━

2 NEW MESSAGES FROM M&M . . .

TAEHYUNG
the girl's 3 am disease has
latched onto me and now i
cant sleep

TAEHYUNG
5 am already and i need to wake
up in 2 hours how does she manage
to this lifestyle

Y/N
it's not a lifestyle it's freestyle

Y/N
dis ease

Y/N
are you a disease cause you infect me

YOONGI
That was clever

JUNGKOOK
the only thing in my mind
is how does that disease spread

JUNGKOOK
is it an std 👀

YOONGI
I need to go

TAEHYUNG
I regret sending a message here

JIMIN
Bye yoongi
please take a good rest

Y/N
omg jimin commere
my brooo

TAEHYUNG
Quick act scared and leave
@jimin

Y/N
no he sent me a heart yesterday

JIMIN
please don't misunderstand that

JUNGKOOK
oof friend zoned?

JIMIN
I thought you really understood me

JUNGKOOK
oof nderstanding zone

Y/N
with the 2nd lead thing?

Y/N
dang at least you get noticed tho
i'm like the parents of the mc

Y/N
which means i'm never even
in the story i'm just mentioned

Y/N
i'm there bc i'm needed
for the plot

JIMIN
sometimes getting noticed hurts
even more

JUNGKOOK
i'm always the main guy
#cantrelate

TAEHYUNG
why are yall awake even

Y/N
namjoon fell asleep chatting
with me bro

TAEHYUNG
what?
he came around too

TAEHYUNG
and I thought he was the only
sane person here -_-

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

Can't wait for the day we are all old 70 year old rich and good smelling grandmas in the concerts waving our walking sticks together