Finn - Home

Thump...thump...thump.

Kick...kick...kick and thump.

And now screaming giggles, very loudly, too loud and laughter.

"What the F...k," I yell and turn around to see who is sitting behind me.

Giggle, giggle and giggle. " I told you that was him," she says smiling at me through the gap in the seats.

"Hey," I say smiling through gritted teeth.

"You're Finn right? Finn Jackson," the other girls interrupts her friend and gleams at me.

"Ah.... yep. The one and only," I reply.

Just once, I'd love to board an International flight home where no one recognises me.

It's not like I don't love our fans. I do. It's just that last months trip home was chaotic and with the preparation for the Australian Aria nominations, and my family discussion - or should I say family arguments - about the sudden appearance of my.... up until now.... non existent dad, I'm shattered.

I just want to sleep.

"So you're flying home right? For your brothers birthday?" the first girl asks and learns forward so her nose is right between the seats which now is completely blocking her friends view.

I've learnt over the years not to entertain peoples' questions, as they're always intrigued about my life, my real life and not the one that's posted online.

Oh shit, is this information already online? So much for a quiet family gathering in Sydney for my baby Bro's birthday!

"Yep," I reply. "Just visiting my little Bro for his birthday." There's no point arguing as clearly someone has already posted it.

Must have been that chic with the iPhone at LA airport. I knew she wasn't taking photos of her friends at the departure gate. Ahrr.... Nan's going to be soo.... pissed!

"So how old is your brother? Where's the party happening?" she wickedly grins as if to say.... I won't tell anyone.

Yeah, right!

I press the button calling for the Flight Attendant to come over hoping she can rescue me. There is no way I can handle a fourteen hour flight home with fans bombarding me every five seconds (of summer) with personal questions.

(Hiya readers - I couldn't help the pun!)

"Hi Mr. Jackson. Can I assist you with something?" the Flight Attendant smiles sweetly.  It's the same crew as last months trip so I smile back and ask very quietly.

"Um.... yes. Would it be possible to move seats? I hate to ask but I really just need some sleep on this flight and I'm not sure that's going to happen today." I glance slightly sideward to indicate why I need to move seats.

She smiles again and response loudly with, "Actually, I was coming to see if you wanted to move to our First Class cabin Sir. We have some spare seats and it would be our pleasure to upgrade you. Would you mind moving now? It will allow me to complete my cabin check-in for Business Class and the First Class crew can settle you in immediately." 

Oh I love you.... no, not really but I'm lovin' your work! She is.... hmm, stunning and incredible hot!

"Now," I respond as if surprised. "Absolutely and thanks."

She moves aside so I can stand up to grab my luggage from the overhead storage compartment.

"Just two bag this trip Mr. Jackson," she inquires.

So you do remember me from last month.... hmm.... Interesting.

~🎵~

My Sydney Uber driving is waiting for me at the gate. They don't usually do this but as I'm a regular and it's a long ride home.... I get privileges.  It's just after midnight and I'm glad I didn't book a rental car as I'm far too tired to drive myself home. I'll have to borrow Mums' car after the promo gig tomorrow, or should I say in five hours as the flight was delayed from LA by six hours.

"Hello Mr. Jackson" Dave says with a smile. "No checked luggage this trip?"

"Hey Dave. You know you can call me Finn right? I'm not that old dude!" I answer with a grin. I've slept most of the flight home so I feel like I'm back to my old self. "Just this duffel bag and my guitar. It's mostly a family visit so I don't need my drums and I still have my practise set at mums if I need them," I tell him.

"Oh yeah. Say happy birthday to your Bro for me. He's a great kid." Dave says while taking my duffel bag and guitar off me as we walk out of the airport to the valet parking lot.

Dave lives near my mum and knows her well. By well, I mean around the hood. He often drives her home if she's on late shift or, to and from the pub when she can't drive.... or should I say shouldn't drive. He's good at keeping secrets, keeping mums escapades out of the press.

"Thanks Dave, I will. So any news your end? How's the family?"

We talk for most of the trip home which is nice. It's refreshing to be home and just be me. Finn, the guy that grew up in Western Sydney and plays a bit of music. You're gota love Aussies for that. We're a pretty laid back bunch.

Growing up I was really shy. Maybe it's because I didn't have a dad around although I'm luckily than most.  My family are pretty good. We all seem to support each other and I have incredible aunties, uncles, a Nan and Pop. They were my roles models growing up.

You wouldn't think it now but I've always had issues with looking at people, especially directly into their eyes. It's too confronting, too personal for me. I also found it hard to hold long conversation so most of my time was spent listening and watching my surroundings. I guess that's why I learnt to write. Write about other people's experiences as I heard and saw them.

I've also always loved music. It been my escape so having the ability to pick up and play any instrument, was handy and then of course came the drums.... my real passion for music.

We finally arrive home, well mums' house at just after one am.  It wasn't too bad a trip this time in the morning and the house is flooded with light.

Oh no, what the...!

"Don't worry Finn," Dave whispers.  "Your mum's home safe. I drove her home from the local before I came to collect you from the airport, although she might have had a little too much to drink!"

Of course she has.

"Thanks again Dave," I reply as he hands me my duffel bag and guitar from the boot of the car. "I better get in there and find out what's go'n on."

I race inside the front door and from the hallway I hear mum calling from her bedroom,"Is that you Finn?" 

"Hey mum, it's me.  I'm com'n in," I respond as I push open her bedroom door and head towards her en-suite bathroom.

Damn it, there she is on the bathroom floor with her head held over the toilet bowl.

Having to hold back my mums hair so she can throw up tonight's consumption of alcohol certainly wasn't how I imagined our family reunion would go. I'd hoped she'd got it all out of her system last month especially after Alex's lecture.  Alexandra our new publicist practically begged my mum, 'Get drunk at home, not in public.' Clearly that didn't work.

F..k! Another Jackson family drama for her to deal with. Lucky me! Wait 'til Alex finds out about my mums endless hookups....!

"Shit mum, I thought we agreed you were on a detox," I'm hoping my questions don't send her over the edge tonight and we end up in Westmead hospital to have her stomach pumped.

Well at least this time I didn't have to drag her ass out of the pub and have some asshole post a picture online. I'm learning that this is the price of fame. You have no personal life, or at least a personal life that's not posted all over the internet.

I let go of her hair and wipe the last remaining vomit from the side of her mouth with toilet paper, then gently place my hands under each of her armpits to lift her off the cold marble bathroom floor.

"Let's get you into bed mum. It's 1 30 am and I have a car coming at 5 am to pick me up for the 2Day FM radio interview," I plead while tightening my grip under her arms so she doesn't slip on the trail of vomit that's covering most of the bathroom floor.

"You and your stupid 'Rock Star' life. If only they knew the real you, the one where you're cleaning up after your drunken mother," mum snorts.

Now having mum on her feet, I slip one arm around her back for support and help her walk from the bathroom to the side of her bed, then slowly release my arm as she flops backwards on the bed. I lightly grab her legs by the ankles and swing her legs around onto the bed so I can pull the doona from the bottom of the bed over her, still fully clothed.

There comes a point where you just can't strip your mothers clothing off even if they're covered in vomit!

Thank goodness my siblings are at Nan and Pop's house tonight. They don't need to watch another episode of my mums demise....

This house is so much bigger than I remember and a lot better than our last one. Four large size bedrooms, all with built-ins wardrobes, three bathrooms – both mums and mine came with en-suites bathrooms, two living rooms, one enormous kitchen which now looking at it was a waste as mum never cooks, and a four car garage that we've split into two sections that allowed me to build a home music studio.

The house is quiet. A lot quieter than my apartment in LA. I can't sleep now. I'm too wired from the flight and mums drama so I dump my bag in my room and head towards the garage with my guitar. Maybe I'll be inspired to write.

~🎵~

The radio gig went better than I thought. Kyle and Jackie were fun.... Jackie is pretty hot for a older chic.... clearly I have a thing for blondes with blue eyes.

They handed me a large coffee as I arrived, as well as a green smoothie with a kick. It kinda tasted like a pinch of cayenne powder. That shit wakes you up pretty quickly!

I was so relieved when they only asked me to sing one song, acoustic style.... I'm not the singer in our band, Jas is.

[There should be a GIF or video here. Update the app now to see it.]

Again, I was asked if I have a girlfriend. Who has time, is what I really wanted to say but.... I answered as per script.... not yet! Alex says it gives us an edge, being young and single. We get more fan support this way but it's actually the truth, we don't have time to date.

I wished the guys had been there. Especially Connor. He's my rock and fuck'n funny but I won't ever tell him that. He doesn't need the encouragement.....!

Who would have thought my passion for music would turn into a career? Playing the drums and writing songs that are now sung by millions of people around the world. If our fans even found out about my past, my real life family struggles, I'm sure my career would be over.

This week will be tough as I'm going to confront my family about my dad. I have so many questions about my past, especially around my dad.... as now I know, he didn't leave by choice. 

He was forced to leave by my family!

My family have a lot of explaining to do!

~🎵~

(Hey guys....I hope you're enjoying my story so far and thank you for reading it.....I'm so grateful. Please add whatever comments you like as I'm new to creative writing and please keep reading.... littleredsdream)