A/N:

This chapter is rated mature! It's not spicy as I've said before. But smut is smut:) I'm very new at this please be nice LMAO

Elle strips out of her jumpsuit and takes a quick body shower, rubbing herself in all the right places to make sure she's ready to be in bed with Naoki, her ex. The ex she hasn't even kissed.

Two and a half years ago, all Elle wanted was for Naoki to hold her, to give her a warm embrace when she was falling apart. Who would've thought she'd offer more than that, and he'd accept it without batting an eye?

Naoki has confessed he still likes her, and to some extent, she believes him. Because why else will he come up to her and stay?

Well, it cannot be like like. Perhaps it's an attraction, an itch he wants to scratch, so he can move forward with his life. Even though he insists he's no longer angry, it's evident in his words. In his tone. In his eyes.

Elle stares at her reflection in the mirror. Her makeup is intact, strands of hair moist but well-kempt.

"It's the least you can do, Elle. The least."

As she puts on a pale blush silk robe, the words 'maid of honor' embroidered on its back, she hears a knock on the door.

Elle curls her fists, drawing a sharp breath, then unlocks it. Naoki partly lifts his hand to say hi, but she instantly pokes her head out to check if anyone's there. She's on the same floor as the bridal entourage, and she doesn't want anyone to know about this... Escapade.

"What are you looking for–?"

Elle drags Naoki by the collar. "Ssh."

She slams the door behind him. "Did anyone see you?" she quizzes, gazing up at him. His breath smells minty. He must've brushed his teeth. Or maybe he ate some candy?

"No," Naoki answers meekly. "I made up some excuse. Sorry, it took me a bit more time. Taylor wouldn't let me go–"

Elle cuts him off. She places her hand on the back of his neck, squeezes her eyes shut, then seals Naoki's lips with hers.

Naoki doesn't resist. God knows how many times he's imagined the exact scenario, but Elle taking the lead takes the cake–it's a hundred percent dream come true. He arches his back then pushes her to the wall, creating a soft thud, her hair falling everywhere.

Elle's chest grows hot and feverish, a sudden gush of ache flooding her stomach to her groin as Naoki's tongue plunges into her mouth, swirling with hers impatiently. He runs his palm over her waist to her left thigh, hooking it around his hip, and he lets out a soft moan when she thrusts toward him, allowing his bulge to rub against her entrance.

"Elle..." he grunts breathlessly.

Her hands fumble with urgency, removing his coat and bowtie and unbuttoning his shirt. Before she unbuckles his belt, however, Naoki grasps both her wrists.

"Wait, Elle."

"What?" she asks, panting. She tries to kiss him again, but he tips his face away, her lips grazing his jaw.

Elle growls, "What is it, Naoki?"

"Are you sure you want this?"

"Are you seriously asking that now?"

"Just making sure you know exactly what's going to happen here," he clarifies fiercely. "I don't want you waking up not remembering anything."

"I'm clear headed. And as a matter of fact, I know what happens when people have sex," she states firmly, anchoring her free hands on his belt, slipping a finger beneath the fabric.

Naoki snickers. Without breaking eye contact, he trails a forefinger to her neck, to her shoulder, then to her clavicle. Elle's heart pounds, a resurgence of the interrupted heat materializing.

"I don't question it," he utters. "But there's no need to rush."

"We don't have all night."

He raises an eyebrow. "Why not?"

"Because we have to sleep?"

"Oh, sweetie," Naoki murmurs, a smirk crossing his lips as he undoes the knot of Elle's robe. "We're not sleeping."

Naoki did mean it when he said there wouldn't be any sleep involved that night. By 3 AM, he's about to reach his second climax while Elle has had three, the first she practically begged him to stop, the ponytail proving to be useful for yanking his head when the stimulation was too much for her to handle.

Not once has she ever experienced a man go down on her the same as he did; they often thought it took her too much time to finish. But Naoki was patient and meticulous, paying attention to the embarrassing guttural sounds she expelled when he hit the perfect spots.

With his slender fingers and his gorgeous mouth, Naoki rose to the challenge, and good Lord did he raise the standards.

Naoki undid his ponytail after she accidentally tugged his lock of hair, leg shivering, as she reached her second with him inside her. He threw his head back, laughing, and Elle thought he looked pretty in spite of the shadows concealing half his face.

He laughed while his one thumb circled her most sensitive spot, the other busy playing with the peak of her breast. And then came her third almost immediately. Not even letting her enjoy some post nut clarity.

"I'm close," Naoki moans, thrusting slower, as he lands soft kisses on where her right ear meets her neck, finding his way to her lips.

The number of times she's kissed him she cannot keep count. But she can certainly get addicted to them.

What a disaster. If it's not the same degree of pleasure, sex will forever be ruined for her. Maybe it's Naoki's goal. To leave her wanting for more when he finally exits her life.

And Elle acknowledges it's a punishment she deserves.

Elle entwines her limbs behind him, and pulls him deeper. She suppresses a yelp.

"Shit, Elle..."

Naoki collapses on top of Elle as his liquids spill out. He pants, rolling the condom off his length, and tosses it into the bin before lying down next to her, their chests falling and rising in sync.

"I'm so tired," Elle groans. "But that was so good."

"Thanks."

She slaps his thigh, chortling. "Can we actually go to bed now? Please?"

Naoki rests his cheek on a clenched fist and turns to face her. "For sure."

"Okay. Thank goodness." She tucks herself in, the blanket covering up to her chin. When she peeks with one eye open, she sees Naoki looking at her.

"Why aren't you sleeping?"

"I will. You can go ahead first," he says, smiling.

"I can't sleep if you're staring at me."

Naoki bobs his head in understanding and lies on his side, still facing her. He scoots closer and plants a tender kiss on her nose.

"Good night."

Elle gulps, grateful that the night lamp isn't bright enough to show the crimson staining her cheeks.

Blushing over a kiss on the nose? After all that? Really?

"Um, yeah. Good night."

Sleep does overcome the two's consciousness, but mostly due to the exhaustion and the alcohol intake. If not for Naoki's flight and Elle helping with the coordination of Zoe's wedding, they might have ended up wide awake, thoroughly compensating for the lost time. For whatever it was they were missing out on.

When Naoki regains his senses, he finds Elle's side of the bed empty. He sits upright, massaging his forehead, then he recklessly ties a bunch of hair, a few strands sticking out.

"Elle?"

She comes out of the bathroom fully clothed in a pair of shorts and a white tank top. "Hey."

"What time is it?"

"It's 9 AM," she replies, strolling to the windows. She whirs the blackout curtains open, and the rays of sunshine bathe the interior of the room. Naoki's tuxedo and other pieces of clothing lay on the table before the television.

Naoki yawns and gets up from the bed. Elle averts her gaze from his bareness, dismissing the wave of memories surging in her mind. Just a few hours ago, he was all over her and she was all over him.

Naoki slips his pants on, glimpsing at her. "Are you embarrassed?"

"No, of course not," she retorts hastily.

He buttons the cuffs of his shirt, the coat hanging on his arm. "Go and get dressed."

"What?"

"Let's get something to eat."

Elle's lips press together in a slight grimace, mouth going dry. She practiced inside the bathroom. She has to say it.

"No, Naoki," she says, voice wavering. "This is where we say goodbye."

The words splinter Naoki's chest all at once, his jaw hardening. "What?"

"You knew this was coming, right? We can't have more than this."

"It's just breakfast."

"You know it's not just breakfast. If we leave this room together..." she trails off.

Naoki strides forward and cups her cheek. Hiding his intention is a fool's errand. "Elle, we can try again. Let's try again, please?"

The skin bunches around Elle's eyes, its corners starting to moisten. "You're leaving tomorrow, Naoki."

"I can afford to fly back every month. I can fly you out, too. It's not gonna be as difficult as it was before."

"That's not practical—"

"We can go to Hong Kong like we planned. We can go anywhere."

She sighs, "Until when?"

Naoki fidgets, but he doesn't back off. "I mean, we can talk about the arrangement. And see where it goes. But just... Just give it some thought."

"See where it goes?" Her chin dips down. "I don't know, Naoki. I can't do that again."

"Fine. I'll move."

Elle shakes her head. "No, that's... I don't think I can let you do that."

Naoki takes her right hand, caressing it gently. "Didn't you feel anything last night, too?"

She did. It was as if nothing changed. As if nothing ever went away. But Naoki doesn't need to hear any of her real thoughts.

He's going to leave, nevertheless.

"It's just sex. It's not as if we agreed on attaching other meanings to it."

"That's why we're talking about it now. I want to try again," he pleads. "It'll be different this time. If you need me, I'll be here."

Elle swallows hard. The days leading up to their break up was one of her worst times, and even though she's better now, she can't put herself through that again. The journey had taken so much of her life. She'd been shattered, glued back, and shattered again.

Over and over and over.

Elle had guessed Naoki might want her back, but she also deluded herself into thinking that he would simply leave after they did the act. Because he should've realized that nothing could come out of a relationship between two people whose worlds were different.

It has been nearly three years.

But now she's realizing she's made another terrible mistake. She has led Naoki on instead of giving him the closure he needs.

When Elle doesn't reply, Naoki puffs out air, his voice hoarse, "Why aren't you trying? Did you sleep with me out of pity? Is that it? Did you pity me, Elle?"

She moans, "No, that's not it, Naoki. It's... It's... I wanted to make it up to you—"

"So it is pity. I can't believe it," Naoki says, his tongue poking against the side of his cheek. "You're cruel."

A tear flows down Elle's cheek, yet she can't defend herself. She has no right. "No, Naoki... It's not like that."

"Then what?" Naoki releases her. "Why is it so hard for you to tell me to stay?"

"I'm sorry," she utters ruefully, desperately suppressing a strangled sob that she hiccups, "I'm sorry... Naoki."

Naoki shakes his head vehemently, covering his face with both palms as his own tears descended like a storm. He wanted to be the one to say goodbye first, but he couldn't lie to himself. Not after he's shared his body and soul with Elle. Not after he's recognized and seen it in her eyes that she still felt the same way, too.

But it's a losing battle that Naoki's too exhausted—and can no longer—fight alone.

A/N:

This feels like like we're close to the ending, doesn't it? Hahahahaha. But as you've probably figured out by now, this is an exes to lovers trope, so we're only getting started!

I don't wanna be that person but whose side are you on here? It'll either be can survive LDR or cannot survive LDR I guess LOL. (I've been in an LDR for almost five years now, and though we're finally reuniting soon, I'll have to say I'll be on team can survive hahaha.)

This chapter is unfamiliar territory to me as I've always gone the slowest of the slow burn and the wholesome route. I'm excited to see where this is gonna go!