Nate noticed a sullen change in Clara as they strode along the deck, the cold air nipping at their exposed faces. She hadn't said much since he apologized and a little stubble of worry ate at him. What if she decided to leave? He shook the thought from his mind as clutched her hand a little tighter.

"Have I upset you?" He finally asked as he pulled them to a stop.

Clara avoided his eyes afraid of what she might see reflected in them, she shook her head.

"For once in my life, Nate, I am unsure of myself and insecure. I've never felt that way."

He noticed the way she held herself, her shoulders slumped and her eyes brimmed with tears.

"Don't be, is it because you are used to worrying about yourself? Are you too used to traveling alone?" Nate wanted her to face him. He wanted to see what she was thinking instead she stared at the ocean.

"Maybe, I just don't know, Nate! I've spent half my life looking out only for myself then you come along. I like you, I even love you, but..." Clara turned to him at long last. Her cheeks were reddened with tears.

"But what, what is it Clara?"

"But what if father is dead and the business sold, what will we do then? I want to go to college, but what if..." She let her sentence die as she buried her nose into his shoulder.

The rhythmic beating of his heart comforted her until she quit crying so hard, his arms held her tight. It was then that she knew what frightened her so much with him. He provided her comfort. She never knew what comfort was like even as a child she fended mostly for herself.

"You're shivering, lets go back to my suite and you can rest there." Nate took her by the arm and led her towards the first class entrance. She was tired of the emotional overload she was tired of the play-acting.

When they reached the West's suite, Clara couldn't wait to crawl between the covers and rest. He unlocked the door and a big fluffy beast wiggled its way next to Clara and she laughed.

"Poppet!"

The dog seemed more then happy to see her, his tail wagging so fast his backend wagged too. Nate smiled softly at Clara as she knelt on the floor and buried her nose into the dog's soft fur. She missed him, she knew she had abandoned him since they arrived aboard the Titanic and she felt horrible.

"I think I will take him for a walk, ok?" Clara said in a quiet voice, she needed the time away from him to think.

"Sure, here's his leash." Nate replied as he snatched the worn leather leash off the nearest chair. He didn't want to crowd Clara or scare her away because she truly was like a wild creature.

"Thanks," Clara clipped the rusted fastener onto Poppet's collar and quickly left the room.

She ignored the looks sent her way as she climbed the stairs onto the chilly deck with Poppet in tow. The dog wagged its tail as they strode along the polished deck, only a small amount of couples were out in the cold. She had overhead rumors of Captain Smith receiving ice warnings but she didn't bother herself with it. On a ship this large there were bound to be rumors, and on an ocean as cold as this one there was bound to be ice.

"I see you haven't troubled yourself with returning to us."

Clara smiled sadly as she heard Ivy's stern yet gentle voice behind her.

"Ivy, I haven't meant to stay this long, Nate wants me to stay the night with him and he wants Poppet here too. I don't know what to do it's just all coming at me so fast I can't breathe!"

Ivy surprised Clara by laughing as she slid up to the rail next to Clara. A broad smile was on the older woman's face.

"You've never experienced love before, Clara. Jump in and don't think twice. If you do you'll never get anywhere. You are so used to your world being all about you and your pooch you're confused."

"I already have jumped in without thinking." Clara said with a sheepish grin, her face flared into a deep crimson blush.

"I see...tell me what was it like?"

"Oh, Ivy, come, tell me you already know?"

Ivy giggled like a young girl and shook her head.

"Not all men are the same, Clara. Besides it's a sin you know to do that outside of marriage."

"Life's short, and it was wonderful until his mother barged into the room. If you could have seen the look on her face, you'd be laughing too!" Clara laughed loudly at the memory.

"Surely you joke with me! His mother walked into the room? Whatever did she say?"

Clara tried to calm her laughter while Poppet sat at her feet and cocked his head.

"She said not a word instead she got into a rather heated argument with me at dinner about whether or not I deserve Nate!"

Ivy sighed and linked her arm in Clara's. She didn't know what to tell her friend.

"We shall see in the end won't we?"

Clara ran her hand along the smooth rail and leaned over farther to watch the dark water swirl past them.

"That looks miserably cold."

Ivy shivered as she thought about what it would be like to plunge into that water.

"I wouldn't worry about it. I hope we have no reason to worry anyways. You know I think I read a book about a ship like this one that sunk because of icebergs. It may just be my imagination."

Clara thought for a moment then shook her head.

"No, actually the book was called Futility by Morgan Robertson. I like to read so I would know, not saying you don't like to read." Clara winked and trembled as the cool air finally started bothering her. Ivy noticed and jerked her head towards third-class.

"I gotta get back anyways, we miss you, Clara, but you go out and grab that star and don't let go of it! Goodnight, friend." Ivy said as she hugged Clara.

Clara stood for another moment watching the ocean, her hands buried in Poppet' fur. Finally, she took his leash and led them back towards the corridor, she saw Madeleine Astor walking her dog.

"Good evening, Clara. This is Kitty, I adore your dog. He is quite handsome."

Madeleine patted Poppet on the head as he sniffed noses with Kitty who looked equally as interested in him. Clara cut the meeting short, she felt exhausted and as she made her way to the door and raised her hand to knock she paused. Lowering her head, she thought about what she was getting into. Was Ivy truly right in saying that she had to go after her star?

"Having second thoughts?" Nate said softly from the door and Clara finally realized he was there. She hadn't heard him open the door she did notice Poppet was frantically licking Nate's hand. He worried about the look of anxiousness on her fine-featured face.

"I'm simply confused about these feelings, Nate. I am always so sure of myself and..."

Nate didn't wait for her to finish her sentence. He was tired of hearing it. Either she loved him or she didn't and he wanted to prove to her his feelings. He kicked the door shut, his mouth pressed firmly against hers, his tongue explored every inch of her mouth. She didn't push him away as he kissed her and suddenly she found herself craving more. Poppet made his way to the bath as though knowing they needed to be alone.

"I'm going to prove to you that I love you and please don't think just feel." Nate whispered hoarsely as he buried his hands in Clara's matted hair.

"Then do so, Nate, don't make me wait, don't let me think."

Nate pushed her backwards all the while he kissed her. The feeling of her in his arms fueled his desire. She felt him pressed hard against her as he picked her up and gently laid her on the bed. His eyes were a deeper green as he became aroused, she couldn't help but kiss him more. Nate felt her need as he ran his hands over the swooping neckline of her dress; he wanted to kiss her everywhere.

***

The next morning he awoke before Clara, her warmth made him want to stay where they were however he had to go to the service. With a gentle kiss on her nape, Nate quietly rolled out of bed and pulled on his trousers. She didn't move the entire time and Poppet simply wagged his tail as Nate passed. After he had bathed, he sought out Maxwell.

"Tell her to take a bath if she wishes, I shall await her company in the Café Parisien." Nate smiled as though he was a happy young child again and Maxwell took a curious look at Clara.

"She has made you more contented then any thing we have ever offered you, Nate." Maxwell assisted Nate into his black suit coat then he left with one more glance at Clara.

As he made his way towards the dining saloon for the Sunday service, Nate thought about his future life. It would be glorious to see what the other side of New York looked like. With Clara by his side, he knew they might experience many curious adventures. Deep in his heart he loved her with more passion then he ever thought possible, it was mutual so he hoped.

He wanted to share many more nights lying next to Clara. In his mind he saw them getting married at a small church. Two children ran around their house with a tired, old Poppet. Nate's mind even carried him to their elder years with them sitting in their rockers on the porch of a small house.

The service was well underway by the time Nate reached the saloon and his mother ignored him when he entered. He stood by the door singing the hymns absentmindedly wondering when Clara would awake. Captain Smith bellowed out the tunes in his deep voice, Nate smiled inwardly. He wished Clara stood next to him, he knew she would have some comment under her breath. Closing his eyes he thought of the night before, it was glorious to be so close to her.

When the service ended on the line "those in peril on the sea" which Nate paid no attention to, he rushed to the café. There were already several young couples there however he did not see Clara. Clayton and Augusta sat by one of the windows, Augusta had her shawl wrapped tightly around her.

"Where's your young lass, eh, Nate?" Clayton said with a crooked grin. Nate shrugged and sent a curious gaze over his shoulder towards the doors.

"Shall I go see if she needs assistance in preparing herself for luncheon?" Augusta asked as though she sensed his worry. He gave an abrupt nod before he sat close to the window glad for the cool air.

Clara woke with a start, a horrible dream left its presence with her as she swung her legs over the side of the bed. Turning, she saw Nate wasn't next to her and she shrugged. A knock at the door warned her to wrap her naked body in the warm coverlets; Poppet hopped onto the bed next to her.

"Come in?" Clara called wondering if it was Nate, she hoped it was.

"Lady Clara, Lord Nate instructed me to tell you to take a bath if you wish then meet him in the Café Parisien." Maxwell bowed then shut the door leaving her alone once more.

"Poppet, what are we doing here with men serving us, eh?" She asked as she patted the dog's soft hair. He wagged his large tail as he looked up at her, his deep brown eyes held the truth.

"You're right, we don't belong here and the sooner we realize that the better! I love Nate, I really do but I believe he'll be better off with one of his kind." Clara snatched her dress from the floor and flounced to the bath where she quickly locked the door.

As the warm water filled the porcelain tub, Clara made a mental list of the things she wished to do before leaving the Titanic. The ship was probably the biggest event that happened to her in the past years, she wanted to remember it. Perhaps on her way out she would stop by the barbershop and buy a souvenir. She prayed silently as she stepped into the swirling water that Nate wouldn't be angry with her.

"There are things you have to let go of in life no matter how hard it hurts you. The pain eventually fades but the memories do not." Clara's father told her many things but he was insistent on life matters.

After washing her hair with the fragrant soap, she dunked under the water and momentarily was grateful she knew how to swim. Wrapping herself in a thick, white towel, she called in Poppet. The giant dog lumbered towards the tub as though readily accepting his fate. In all honesty the dog enjoyed swimming and he happily splashed in the water.

When she was fully dressed, and Poppet was fully dry, she left the room with one last, long look. Her father was right, you made memories and you moved on if it was for the better. Poppet whined as though he was hungry, her stomach also growled as she led them onto the deck. She could almost believe the rumored ice warnings. The air was so chilly she fairly ran across the deck.

"Clara!"

Clara froze when she heard Augusta's voice from the first-class entrance. She slid along the polished deck with Poppet close behind.

"Hello Augusta!" Chuckled Clara as she leaned against the rail for support, the huge funnels caught her attention.

"They look imposing today don't they? Nate's waiting for you in the Café Parisien, dear, won't you come?"

Clara anxiously twirled the end of her hair around her fingers while she thought up an excuse. Tell the truth Clara, it's the best thing a soul can do when they are speechless, her father's voice echoed in her head.

"Augusta, I can't keep playing this charade much longer! I'm tired of pretend. If Nate truly loves me then he can come to third-class. That's understandable isn't it? I love him, Augusta, I truly do however he needs to live the life we will be sharing. He needs a taste of it now not later."

Augusta nodded knowingly then inched forward until she stood arm to arm with Clara.

"When Clayton told me he loved me and that nothing was going to change his mind I thought he was a fool. As time goes on you must realize that men are practically incapable of telling you their feelings. Men will be men, but when they tell you they love you and go to such extremes, you must believe them. Take that into consideration, Clara, it is of course a ship and we know where to find you." Augusta hugged her then walked away. Clara paused then shook her head.

"Poppet, what say we find some food?"

Clara smiled as they trotted down the stairs into the third-class area on the poop deck. Several people looked at her curiously until they remembered it was Clara then they smiled, only slightly. Who she really wanted to see was Ivy, she wanted to drink and dance her day away.

"Well, what are you doing back here? I thought we agreed that you would catch your star and hold it?"

Clara whirled around and flew into Ivy's arms, she was more then happy to see the woman who understood her best.

"I'm seeing if that star will fall to my level, I need to know that he's willing to live like this."

"You are very unsure of personal matters aren't you, Clara?" Ivy said after a moment and Clara nodded.

"But lets forget this, I'm hungry, I'm sure we still have something to eat right?"

Nate sat straighter when she saw Augusta slide through the doors, Clara wasn't with her and he suddenly felt a sinking feeling. Augusta sat down and began picking at her food until she finally met his gaze.

"She said she loves you however...she needs to know that you can stand her life by sharing the rest of the voyage with her in third-class. Clara also said she is tired of playing 'charades' as she put it. I'm truly sorry Nate. It seems if you love her then you will leave your life of luxury now."

"We shan't talk of any one leaving, not at the table anyways. Tell me Nate, what's this business of your family's like?" Jordan asked.

Nate tried to reply but his mind was on Clara, he couldn't believe that she left after what they had shared.

"Perhaps we shall say luncheon is over, let us pick up the charge this time." Augusta said as she placed a hand on Clayton's arm, she knew Nate needed time alone.

Nate left Clayton and Augusta at the café and he marched straight to the smoking room where his father was. He was about to tell Frederick that he had had enough of the West lifestyle. When Frederick saw his son he decided he would invite him in for a game of cards. Nate never spent time with his father and instead decided to play a hand, as he sat down a pain went through him. It was as though the fates wanted him to stay away from Clara and he stubbornly refused to apologize to her.

Clara sat on her berth looking at the journal pages she wrote within the past few days and she sighed. Her life was like a terribly written novel that transitioned into a romance towards the end. "Funny," she thought. "Why did I suddenly say towards the end?" Picking up her pen, Clara wrote her thoughts and mostly her feelings, she had plans to turn her journal into a novel.

Poppet whined waking her out of her deep sleep and she stared at him confused for a moment. Lying on the floor were the journal pages she wrote and she bent over to pick them up. Poppet scratched at the wall telling her he had to go to the bathroom and she sighed. It was back to the normal routine, eat, talk and take care of the dog.

With a smile Clara clipped Poppet's leash to his worn collar and slipped on her shawl. Ivy and Abby left no sign that they had even been in the room the past few hours leaving Clara wondering where they were. When she opened the door she noticed many children running down the corridors playing.

"Come on buddy, we've got a few more days and I need to catch up on spending time with you." Clara said with a pat on his head.

"My goodness there you are, Clara! We've missed you down here!" Abby's voice screeched, Clara couldn't help but notice that she had a handsome young man on her arm.

"I've missed all of you too. Now tell me who the striking fellow is?" Clara nodded her head respectfully at the smiling man.

"This is Harrison Riley, a very refined man and he has quite a sense of humor I might add." Abby giggled as she looked up at the red-haired Harrison who smiled back.

"She's talked endlessly of you, Miss Clara. It's a pleasure to meet you."

"Well, Mr. Riley I hope you and Abby enjoy your day, say Abby what shall I do?" Clara asked with a wink and Abby chuckled.

"The life of the normal bores you, Clara? Well, I daresay you could take a stroll on the poop deck but it's a might chilly, the smoking room would be your best bet."

She watched as Abby and Harrison strode away looking fondly at each other. A slight pain rose in her belly at the thought of Nate but she shook his imagine from her mind. She had Poppet and that was all she needed. They made their way to the smoking room where the conversation was abuzz and no one looked up when she entered. Poppet relieved himself against the windowpane while Clara gazed at the families sitting together.

"Lady, may I pet your dog?"

The little girl wore her blonde hair in pigtails, her dress was a simple one made of gingham. Clara nodded and smiled thinking of how pretty the child was.

"He's a pretty dog, I wish I had a dog but mummy says we can't cause a dog costs too much." The little girl mumbled as she continued stroking Poppet' fur, the dog looked like he was in heaven.

"Well that's what my family said too but I proved them wrong. You can have anything you want as long as you're willing to fight for it." Clara said with a thoughtful smile as the girl nodded and ran off. What a hypocrite I am thought Clara as she thought about how she didn't fight for Nate. Perhaps the next day she would talk to Nate if it wasn't too late.