Author's Note: Hey guys! Thank you for sticking around up to this point. This chapter is coming to you a few hours earlier than I planned and it contains some back-story that is not in the show and originally mine. So please be patient with me and we will get to the end of this drama : )

Thanks and I love you guys!

Chapter 7

I was held up at the office because the director made a surprise visit and wanted us to go through some information with him. What should have taken a few minutes took two hours. I nearly called Kongpob to cancel on our dinner plans, after all I wasn't the only one been held back in the office.

Pete was held back too. If I the team leader had to stay behind then my team has to stay with me. I'm not saying this to be mean, I didn't mind doing all the work alone and letting them off, but the three of them stayed to help. I was actually touched.

When we got out of the office I looked at Pete as he sighed loud after drinking the full can of soda he bought at the entrance. "Ah damn it, I never want to work again."

"We finished late," I said as I checked my wristwatch. It was seven thirty already. We planned to go to the restaurant by eight. There is barely any time left for me to get home and then get ready. Kongpob could already be on his way or waiting for me at my place.

"Yeah, why did the director have to come so late? Working overtime doesn't do well for my looks." I smiled as he flipped his bangs to the side with a sultry movement.

"You look tired, let's just go home and get some rest." I started to open my car door when he grabbed my arm so suddenly, the keys fell down and the sound echoed in the empty parking lot.

"Pete," I asked with some irritation in my voice.

"Sorry, "he bent and picked up the key, "but we can't cancel, that new place doesn't have a refund policy for reservation."

I stared at him, my head too tired to keep up with what he was saying." Reservation? But we didn't make any. You didn't come to me for money."

"Well, "he played with some strands of his hair, "honey and I thought we would treat you guys."

"What?" I smacked him on the head. Why was he acting all coy after doing something annoying? And honey? He's never referred to his lover that way before.

"Team leader?" he stared wide eyed up at me.

"Who told you to do that? Kongpob and I can treat ourselves, "I said.

"But—"he still wanted to talk.

"Anyway," I interrupted him," if you've already spent money I could pay you back but then it would just be such a waste."

I was tired but I didn't know if there would be another opportunity like this again. Besides, I was already dreading the look of disappointment on Kong's face if I told him we have to cancel.

"Alright, let's get home and meet each other at the restaurant by eight thirty," I said. Since he has already made reservations, we would still get a table even if we are late.

We parted and I jumped in my car and rode as fast as I could. Surprisingly there was very little traffic. Maybe I should be coming home at this time every day. Half my time was usually wasted on the road in the evening when I'm driving from work, but this time I got home in a little over fifteen minutes.

I jumped out of my car and hurried up to my apartment, expecting to see Kong there. He wasn't. That gave me pause. He should be back from work by now unless something came up. He would have called if something came up. I should call him.

I reached into my pocket for my phone but it wasn't there. So I searched through my briefcase and it wasn't there either. Could it be in the car?

I decided to go take a shower first before I get any more late. Maybe Kongpob was still getting ready at home. But he was always so punctual. A little bit of worry flickered through my mind as I washed my hair.

I walked out of my house dressed in a red shirt and black pants, got in my car and drove off to Kong's place. I was just about to step out of my car when, through the glass doors, I saw him coming out with someone, a woman. A familiar one.

I squinted and recognized her to be Anya; she was the girl who just entered his life two days ago. Why am I seeing her again so soon?

Something happened between my first blink and my second and when I looked at them again, Kongpob had his arm around her waist holding her to his chest. My fingers clenched around the wheels. What—what was that about?

A feeling I didn't understand bubbled inside me and turned to anger as I frowned at them. They talked and walked out of the building. They were going out, I thought to myself in certainty. Did Kongpob forget about our plans? Why was he going out with Anya? What the hell was going on?

I guess I should come out and confront him, demand an answer from his mouth. But what kind of lies would he spin?

Kong lied a lot in the past, sometimes by omission of the truth which he judged was necessary because I couldn't or wouldn't understand.

So I let their car pass me while I lowered myself on the seat. I was a bit annoyed with myself; I felt disgusting for what I was thinking to do.

I should just go home, I'm sure Kong has a good explanation for this. I glanced at my phone and the light was blinking which meant that I probably have a missed call or a message. But yet I didn't look at it. I needed to see with my own eyes what was happening. It was the only thing that could satisfy me.

Feeling my stomach twist with shame, I drove off behind them.

We ended up at the new place. I was puzzled. Why did Kong bring her here knowing I could be here? It can't be that she somehow talked her way into coming with him.

I stayed hidden outside the door looking in. They sat down and I could see that Pete and his lover, a huge man with a lot of hair around his face, were already seated to the left of where Kong and Anya were seating. They were talking and nothing terrible was happening.

I started to grow annoyed because I can now understand that this was a date. Kong had not come here to meet me, he had come here on a date, and with Anya. I shook my head and clenched my fist.

After a few moments wait I went inside to inform Pete and his lover that I needed to go. I didn't want to keep them waiting, it would be rude plus I needed to pay for the reservation and the meal. I walked in holding my head away from where Kongpob was seating, my head lowered and I went to them, but I didn't make it because I walked right into someone. Into her and she had been holding a drink which poured over her a bit.

"P'Arthit," she gasped my name so loudly, I'm sure the whole restaurant heard.

"I'm sorry," I whispered, intending to help her somehow, but then I heard his voice behind me.

"P'Arthit?" I froze, every muscle in me tensed. I wasn't ready for a confrontation. I am tired and angry and I just wanted to go home. I turned only on reflex.

Then I ignored him and walked away to my car. The idiot came after me. Why didn't he just stay with his date? He liked her so much he was willing to give up what I had felt was important to him.

Who was she to him exactly? Where was she when we struggled with ourselves and our feelings? How can he just put me aside for some stranger? My feelings were bubbling to a peek.

"P'Arthit" he was still behind me. Go away, I thought in my mind. I don't want to fight with you.

He caught my hand just as I reached my car.

"P'Arthit, what's wrong, why did you leave like that?"

Why did he think? I tugged my hand free with a violent jerk and glared at him with all the bitterness I felt. "Don't touch me," I stressed each word.

His eyes went wide and I ignored him again to enter my car and go home and sleep this feeling off till I was clear headed.

"P'Arthit," he grabbed my hand," what's wrong? Why are you so angry?"

I pulled my hand back and pushed him away from me hard. "Why do you think I am? What were you doing in there?"

The eyes Kongpob had then were of pure confusion. Like he didn't know that I was aware he was on a date, like he thought I would be or should be okay with it.

I took a good look at what he was wearing: a fine, white shirt with buttons at the top, and a grey-black trouser. He looked good, refined, fitting of his background.

When Kongpob and I went out on a date we never bothered to dress up. We wore whatever we wanted and went wherever we liked and it usually wasn't a fancy restaurant, but a simple place like the noodle place two blocks from home, the snow house, the beach, nothing that I couldn't pay my own share of.

But here he was in his element and I wondered if he only did that to please me, if this was what Kongpob really wanted and Anya was his perfect fit. I had seen her inside; her gown was lovely, though I might have ruined it. I kinda hoped I did,that was a vindictive feeling that claimed Kongpob as mine.

But I had to see the truth; Kongpob didn't really belong with a lower class like me. That thought angered me so much because I never thought of myself as lower class before; I never felt this inferiority and this gap that existed between us before.

"What are you saying P'Arthit, what was I doing where?"

"Go back," I said, my feelings shutting down. I didn't want to deal with the hurt so I let the anger rule me. "Go back to her, continue your date."

"P'Arthit, what do you mean? You know it's not like that. "

"I don't know anything but you know what, you have my blessing to do what you want. Be with her, I don't care."

"P'Arthit," I ignored the shake in his voice and the twist of his face that said I was hurting him.

"Maybe you should try it with a woman, like you were going to before, and then you would see that what you feel for me isn't real," I said bitingly because I had never truly forgiven Kong for going after P'Dean, a woman who had been crushing on me. The same woman I had told him I would date to keep him from coming back to me. That was three years ago. In fact, I couldn't face what happened even now.

"How can you say that, P'Arthit, after everything I have done to be with you, how can you say that."

"Maybe if you didn't sneak off to go on a date with your father's perfect match for you I wouldn't."

"Sneak off?" he looked at me like I was talking nonsense. What else would I call this?

"I didn't sneak off to do anything P'Arthit, I told you. Why are you acting like you don't know?!"

"You told me?" I was too annoyed to even try to remember that. "And what did I say, su su na?"

"No, I texted you. I told you where we were going, why I had to go and everything I could fit in to make you know that I don't want this. That I love you, and that I hate missing the double date and I hope we could reschedule. And every moment I was in there I thought about you. I wanted so badly to come be with you." He was starting to cry, his black eyes shimmering with tears. He hurriedly swiped away the few tears that fell like they were unforgivable but continued.

"You have no idea how important what you were giving me is to me, how happy it made me. I didn't want to give it up, P'Arthit. It was a struggle for me to do so. And I thought about how you could change your mind and take it away again. I know that it was hard for you to give me this much so I told myself I would understand."

I stared at him in speechless wonder then I opened my car, successfully this time, and searched for my phone. There it was lying in the driver's cabinet. I grabbed it and leaned out of the car. I opened my phone and yes, I could see the call and Kong's texts. He sent two of it.

P'Arthit, I came to your place and you are not home, so I'm going home to change. Be back in an hour.

P'Arthit, my mother knows where I live; she is here with Anya, I'm being forced to go on a date with her. I can't refuse my mother without revealing everything about us. I know you are being wonderful by giving me a chance to meet your friends but I can't make it, P'Arthit. I'm so sorry and I really hate this. I want to come be with you tonight, please let me and I hope we can reschedule with your friends. I love you, Kongpob.

It was safe to say that by the time I got to the end of the message, I was feeling really guilty and upset with myself. I acted so irrationally and now I have hurt Kong. The one person I promised over and over I wouldn't hurt.

"Kong," I started but he withdrew from me shaking his head.

"How could you say that, P'Arthit? How could you even think it? Do you know that I would die without you? Do you have any idea how desperate my love is for you?" his tears fell and is voice broke with pain, pain I inflicted.

"I would never hurt you like this. Why can't you trust me? Is it—is it because of what I did three years ago?"

I said nothing because I couldn't deny that what Kongpob did didn't still hurt me, didn't still rule my thoughts.

He groaned and looked away from me and I heard his choked tears.

"Kong," I move to hug him but he resisted me.

"No, I don't know how else to say I'm sorry. I don't know how else to regain your trust. "

"it's okay Kong," I held his hand and pulled him to me till I could wrap my arms around him," it's okay, I'm sorry." I hugged him for a moment before he hugged me back hard and cried on my shoulder.

He said things that were incoherent and I spoke into his ears reassuring words that I meant. I told him that I loved him, that I'm terrified of losing him and that I never wanted to hurt him this way. I didn't think about where we were, it didn't even occur to me think of people seeing us like this, I just wanted to take away the pain I had caused, I just wanted to return some happiness to the man I loved, and it was working. Kongpob had gone silent in my arms.

Once again I said, "it's alright, I'm sorry, "he said nothing but he nodded slightly against my shoulder. We stood like this, his arms around my waist and my arms around his shoulders.

He sniffed after a moment in bliss silence and I pulled back. I tried to see his face but he avoided my eyes. His eyes looked terrible; he couldn't go back to Anya looking like that

"Are you alright?" I asked.

"Yeah, "he said with a throaty voice and cleared it with a slight cough that told me he was a bit embarrassed. "Can we go home?"

I blinked and looked towards the restaurant. Anya was there waiting and a bit confused; Pete and his lover are probably thinking we stood them up. I needed to at least say something to them before we leave.

"Please?" I looked at Kong and saw his need, something I can satisfy and was more important to me to see satisfied.

"Okay, yeah. Let's go home," I replied as I pulled him into my arms again because it cut me to see him like that. I pressed a kiss to his hair and let go after a moment. He turned around and went to the passage side of my car.

We got in and drove off. I would have to come back and get Kong's car. What would Anya ride? As I turned my car out of the parking lot, I caught a figure standing by the door, her dress blowing around with the wind and she was holding her hair back and keeping them from her face.

Our eyes locked through the car and I see her sad smile. My feet hit break as those sad eyes called up another face. That of P'Dean. She had looked like that the last time I saw her, she was someone Kong and I hurt. And here we are doing the same to another girl.

"What—"

I cut Kongpob off, "I will be right back," I had my eyes fixed on Anya.

He turned his head and saw her too. I see his shoulders tensed. I took over because I know that it wasn't his fault that he forgot about her.

"Where's your key?" I asked. He handed it to me without saying anything and I got out of the car and turned around to meet her still standing there wordlessly.

"Um, Kongpob is not feeling okay," I said and glanced behind me, "do you know how to drive?"

She smiled, "yeah, "she said, "I know how to do a lot of things." Her voice seemed to shake.

I handed the keys to her quietly finding it hard to keep meeting her eyes. "I'm sorry, "I said even though she doesn't understand. She didn't deserve to be walked out on or forgotten. Why is it that Kong and I tend to hurt any woman who got involved with us, women who did nothing wrong except be unaware of the secret we kept.

She accepted the keys and smiled up at me again. "I'll be okay, just make sure to take care of Kongpob. Please."

That's my job. I nodded. My eyes flickered to the door and I found Pete looking this way and hesitantly I waved to him. He didn't seem to be seeing me though, so I lowered my hand after a moment and turned to return to the car. I noticed Anya's phone and stopped.

She saw me look at it and then moved it to hide it behind her dress, which was odd, but I thought nothing of it. "Do you want to exchange numbers? I need some way to know that you got home safely," I said.

"Uh, yeah"

I pulled out my own phone and we exchanged numbers. When I turned around and saw that Kong was looking at us, I could see that he was sorry and his eyes told me he'd like to come down and say something. I shook my head, what was the point.

I got in the car and we drove off.

When we got back, Kong said his mom could still be in his apartment so we decided mine was the only option.

"I shouldn't have left Anya at the restaurant like that," Kong said as he got in. "what if she tells mom?"

I knew that wasn't what he was really worried about but I played along. "Yeah, but I don't think she will. She really believes that you are not feeling well. And you are not. "I opened the door into my apartment and turned on the light before we entered.

"Still, I just wished I had said something to her. She looked really sad, didn't she? My mom likes her a lot, I don't know why; I mean she is a good girl."

I turned around at his rambling. He avoided my gaze and fell silent.

"Kong," I walked over till I was barely a air's breath apart from him and he was forced to meet my eyes. "You didn't hurt her, she knows that you don't feel anything for her, and isn't it too early for her to feel something for you? Enough to get hurt."

He shook his head and I cupped his face, "you didn't hurt P'Dean, I did."

"No, you didn't. If I hadn't tried to force her to choose me,"

"Shut up," I said and kissed him because I didn't want to deal with his infallible opinion of me. I knew the truth, we both hurt that woman and we were both going to carry that weight around forever. That was okay as long as we stayed together forever.

I pulled away and smooth my finger over his lip. "Now let's get ready for bed, there is still work tomorrow."

He opened his mouth to argue but I let my glare shut him up.

He fell silent and we quietly went around each other getting ready for bed. I got in bed last and we both turned away from each other. The guilt I felt was too much for me to take comfort in Kongpob's touch and I don't know what he was thinking.

I pulled the blanket over us and turned off the light. The moon shone on the carpet next to the table, my eyes slowly got used to the semi darkness and I could hear Kong's breathing from behind me. I focused on it and tried to will myself to sleep.

I will trust him next time, I thought, I won't let his past mistakes—our past mistakes—ruin what we have. And I don't want to ever hurt him like I did today again.

I turned to see his back still turned to me. I should say something, anything that would make him feel better.

I turned away without saying anything and stayed in the silent darkness that was somehow comforting and suffocating at the same time. Like drowning with the certainty that you won't die.

Sometime in the night I felt him shift towards me. I was between sleep and awake, I let him guide me to himself without saying a word and I let my arm wrap his and shifted to accommodate his face pressed to my neck.

It felt like a dream half the time but it couldn't be because I felt too good and I fell deeply into sleep.