Author's Note: hey guys! Thanks for reading so far. Writing this story has been wonderful and although it is filled with pains and misunderstanding I still love and cherish our baes, I hope you still do too. If you like the story please leave a vote, it means a lot to us writer, thank you.

Enjoy the read : )

Chapter 12

I didn't throw off P'Arthit's hand when he dragged me out of the hospital room, but he let go of my hand on his own when we entered the crowded waiting area. I watched him as he walked forward and then I looked away.

He took us to the place I found him and P'Dean seating comfortably with his head on her shoulder. I didn't read too much into that, but still I was uncomfortable. I had no idea how P'Dean knew about what happened. P'Arthit must have told her since neither my mother nor I were in any state of mind to inform anybody at the time. We only informed my sisters this morning and they were still not here since they were out of the city. Yet, P'Dean came running to P'Arthit's side and then stayed the whole night with him. I don't know what they did or said to one another but it didn't make me feel happy.

I waited for P'Arthit to say what he wanted to say as he took a look up the stairs to be sure that we were really alone and then faced me. I have made up my mind not to be angry or defensive or say anything at all. After all, P'Arthit was probably still feeling guilty about what happened to my father. I knew he blamed himself for what happened.

When our eyes meet I see that his resolve to touch the shaky subject had dissolved a bit, he was looking thoughtful and hesitant, so I thought maybe I could push it for another time when we were not in a hospital.

"P'Arthit—"

"I—"

We spoke at the same time. I paused to wait for him but he merely looked at me, also waiting. I sighed and turned away. "I'm sorry," I said.

"Why are you sorry," he asked.

He knew why. "I didn't mean it like that, I guess I am just under a lot of stress."

"Kongpob, P'Dean was—"
"I don't want to hear it!" I blew over him surprising myself. What happened to pushing this to a later date? But I really didn't feel like talking about her and what she meant to P'Arthit.

He looked at me as if he understood. "sorry," I apologized avoiding his eyes, "like I said I am under a lot of stress right now and I don't want to talk about this."

"I know that." His voice sounded strangled, pained. "Don't you think I know that? And I want to be there for you but the way you look at me—"he broke off.

"The way I look at you,"

"Like you hate me... or something. You don't want me here, and even though I understand that and I am so sorry," he paused, "nothing can ever take back what I did or turn it around, I just don't want..." the words were choked off and I realized in shock what P'Arthit must have been thinking.

He started panting, an attempt to ward off tears, he never lets me see him cry. But he was crying in front of P'Dean the night before. I shook off the stupid thought.

"I am sorry Kongpob, I didn't know that I would put him in this much danger. I am so sorry, please don't hate me. I should have told you, I didn't intentionally keep it from you or anything like that. I was just trying to help you, and your father he—he also wanted to help us. If I had known that was going to happen to him, I wouldn't have told him to wait for me. If I had seen the trailer coming for him I would have rushed in to save him. It should have been me—"

I took his arm and tugged him to me, wrapped my arms around him and my fingers in his hair. I hugged him close to me, appalled by what he was thinking.

"Don't say that," I said quietly. "Don't ever say that again. If that had happened to you I would—"I exhaled as the picture of P'Arthit like that filled me with fear. "Don't say that ever again."

"But Kongpob," I felt his tears on my shirt.

"I know, but I don't blame you. I told you to trust me but I didn't do a single thing. I let myself be made powerless by Anya, my mother and her father. Do you know," I pulled back so I could see his eyes. He quickly wiped away his tears and looked at me. "I nearly gave up, many times. I wanted to protect you so much that I was willing to marry Anya and put an end to our relationship for real."

He stared at me without saying a word but I knew he was surprised. "I love you P'Arthit," I touched his face, his hair. "You are so precious to me, I would rather be married to someone I don't love than see you beaten or hurt in any way. I wanted to be strong for you but I wasn't. You did what you thought you could to help, how can I blame you for that, how can I hate you? "

His eyes filled with tears and spilled over and I wiped them away. "So stop thinking that I hate you or want you to take my father's place. That is so stupid, P'Arthit. How can I ever want that? I also felt that my father knew something, and I never gave him the opportunity to help me. If I wasn't so scared..."

He took a deep breath and stepped closer to me, "no, I understand your fear. I understand everything Kongpob. That is why I wanted to help you that much badly. I felt useless, like I was merely a weight around your neck."

"You are not. You are everything. My strength. When I thought I would give up, I took one look at you and found the strength again to keep fighting so that one day we would be together again."

"But you were so angry, and you told me to go away."

I smiled a little awkwardly. "More like jealous," I admitted.

He thought about it and then smacked my head, "oh, Kongpob, so you really thought something was going on between me and P'Dean?"

I pouted," she stayed with you the whole night, you were crying on her shoulder, holding her hand. I wished you could have done that with me instead but you were with her. And I haven't been able to be with you for so long. Can you blame me?"

He shook his head and laughed then looked surprised and then laughed again. I smiled and leaned forward to kiss him. He shifted back and admonished, "Kongpob."

"What?"

He looked behind him, saw that there was no one there and that we are alone, then fixed his eyes on me. I smiled at his sweet resignation before I kissed him again slowly, reaching my hand to cup his head but he pulled away.

"Not so much, "he complained and used his fingers to poke my head away, "let's go back and keep an eye on your dad."

I sighed; "fine," then I took his hand. He frowned. "What, P'Dean can hold it and I can't? Who is the boyfriend here?"

"Shut up. P'Dean was just..." he paused for a long time and I was watching him then he said, "shut up." I didn't even say anything and I was being picked on.

We walked back to my father and stayed with him for the night. The next day I forced P'Arthit with reason to go to work. It was Friday and I thought after work he could come back and hang out with me. I too went home to rest at his insistence while Anya and my mother stayed with my father. My sisters came during the middle of the day and they stayed with dad while I went to work on Monday.

By then my father was healing up well and nothing went wrong with his surgery. Anya's father didn't say anything or appeared before us again. Anya though she resents mine and P'Arthit's reconciliation, and the fact we no longer hid it from her or anyone— except from my mother— she maintained a certain kind of silence.

I was happy. I think that is weird, my father nearly died and yet this was the happiest I have been in a while.

Two weeks after the accident, P'Arthit and I were in good terms and I was able to come and go from his house at my pleasure. My mother was too focused on my father's health so I thought that may be things would go back to the way it was before Anya's father entered our lives. P'Arthit and I agreed that he needed to be punished for his actions even though we did not know how to make him pay for it; also we were avoiding that confrontation.

One day as I stepped into my family home just coming back from work, I see that the house was filled with things. Decoration things. I walked towards the stairs and paused at the sight of my sisters. They still haven't gone back home to their husbands.

"Kongpob," they noticed my presence. My eldest P'Cheer gestured for me to come with excited hands so I came over.

"P'Cheer, what are you doing?"

"What do you mean, we are getting the whole place decorated," she said and smiled at her sister sitting on the couch next to her. Soon Anya was there holding a tray of drinks in a tray.

"Here you go P'Cheer, P'Rit, "she passed them the drinks and they thanked her. Anya was still living in my house. I should probably have told her to leave but after all she has done for my mother and father, I couldn't brush the topic with her.

"Kongpob," she was also being very polite to me and to everyone. "You are back, welcome home. Do you want me to get you a cool refreshing drink?"

"No thanks, "I said. "What's going on?"

"What do you mean?" P'Cheer asked laughter in her voice and took a sip of her juice.

"All this," I gestured at the fancy curtains and ribbons, "what are we celebrating."

"You mean you don't know?" P'Rit made an exaggerated show of widening her eyes and leaning forwards. My sisters took after our mother in appearance and together they were a giggling mess of mischief and troubles. They will never change it seems.

"oh," Anya palmed her face, "sorry, P'Cheer, P'Rit, I forgot to tell Kongpob."

Apprehension made me twitch, "tell me what?"

"About the engagement party. Mom decided that she wanted us to announce it today. Actually, she told me yesterday and I had so much to do that I forgot to tell you. Sorry Kongpob."

I stared at her.

"isn't it wonderful," P'Cheer said smiling," finally my baby brother is going to get married."

"I am not getting married," I said and turned without saying anything else, a heavy sigh on my lips. The person that I should reserve my words for was my mother.

"What?" I heard P'Cheer say behind me.

"Kongpob, are you okay?"

I found my mother in her room caring for my father. Although nothing went wrong with my father's surgery, he still couldn't speak and his movement was still very slow. At work I and his assistant manager were doing our best to keep the company functioning but I hoped my father would recover soon and return.

I greeted my mom and she stood from the bed, "oh Kongpob, welcome home." She said.

"Mom, I need to speak with you," I said.

"Yes, I was expecting you."

"Why didn't you talk to me before deciding to throw an engagement party?"

"Talk to you? What will I talk to you about? You and Anya are already engaged but after what happened at the wedding, Anya told me people thought the marriage was off and since you two did not throw an official engagement party I decided we should do that before the wedding."

"Mom," I groaned, "that's not something that you get to decide. It is my decision and I don't want an engagement party."

"Don't tell me," she took a breath, "don't say that you want to go back to Arthit. Do you think just because I allowed him to come around and visit your father that I want you to be together with him?"

Yes, that is what I was hoping. I thought maybe my mother might be softening to the idea of P'Arthit. I guess I was wrong.

"Kongpob, didn't we already talk about this, you know why you have to marry Anya. Even if you don't love her now, you still have to marry her."

"Yes I know," I said defeated. "But I can't do it mother, I still can't do it."

"Because of Arthit? Kongpob, don't make me slap you. I didn't raise you to become this kind of person, you know the right thing to do so do it and stop complaining."

She turned away and said, "go and get changed, I don't want to talk anymore."

I closed the door behind me and went up to my room. I sat on the bed, letting my coat fall on the bed next to me. Whenever the topic of the baby comes up I am unable to speak. I have nothing to say that would get me out of this situation.

I sighed and dropped my briefcase on the floor. This was Anya's doing. She must be growing anxious about her father no longer threatening us. He was ashamed after all and has pulled out his spy from my house even without explanation. Good. But then this. I think it is probably time to tell P'Arthit now, at this rate he is going to find out from someone else.

I took out my phone and lay on the bed on my back. The phone only rang twice before he picked.

"Hello?"

"Where are you?"

"At work," he said, "are you okay?"

He was still treating me with kids gloves, that's always the first thing he asks me when I call. I smiled, "I'm okay, just missing you."

If blushing could make sound, it was this, "mi-missing, what are you talking about, I just saw you yesterday."

I chuckled," I wish I could see you every day," I said, "but I am so busy, it is ruining my life."

"I don't get off work until an hour; I have a lot of work piled up."

"Are you saying you want me to come and that you are missing me too?"

He made a sound that expressed wow, "when did I say that. Who is missing you? I'm just saying."

"I will be there in an hour," I said smiling deeply.

"...do what you want. Are you sure that you are not needed at home though."

That reminded me of my problem. "No, my sisters are here. They keep asking after you," they were completely oblivious about everything happening in my life. Seeing as my mother cannot accept that I love a man how can I expect her to talk about it.

"I want to come but..."

"I know," P'Arthit was still giving my mother her space. "Okay, I am going to wait for you at your place."

"What, right now? Are you trying to put pressure on me?"

"Yeah, so come quickly, I will make dinner."

I heard the smile in his voice," I don't know if there is any ingredient you can use at the house. Should I stop at the market?"

"By this time? They would be close, don't worry, I bought some yesterday. See how good a boyfriend I am."

"hm, you are really good," he said sarcastically, I laughed.

"Okay, see you."

After the call, I changed and walked out of my room. Anya was at my door. "Where are you going?" she asked.

"To P'Arthit."

Her lip entered her mouth and she bit violently, "you are really trying to get yourself in trouble with my father right?"

She still hasn't stop playing the my father card. "No, your father doesn't care anymore," I walked past her.

"Kongpob, what about the engagement party?"

I turned,"you planned it so enjoy it, pretend I'm there."

I was done making dinner before P'Arthit arrived. I leaned over the balcony and saw that he didn't come in his car. Someone had dropped him off and it was a Lanky looking pretty boy with white hair that I vaguely remembered. I think he is the one P'Arthit introduced me to but I wasn't sure. A lot happened that day, it was practically a blur.

When he came up the lift, I opened the door before he could, startling him.

"Did you forget that I am waiting for you?" I asked.

"No, sorry Kong," his face turned apologetic, "I thought you might have left. My car broke down at the office."

I took him by the tie and drew him close, he leaned back, "I'm not complaining," I said. He still smelled good despite being out all day, and his flushed face. I have missed this so much.

"Then," he inched past me, "I'm going to go take a shower." He hurried off into the bedroom.

Having been apart for nearly two months, it was like we were learning the ropes of how to be together again. P'Arthit got insanely shy and I was looking forward to lowering his guard again and making him lose control. I smiled and wanted to close the door but someone stopped me.

Immediately I tensed and meet the eyes of a guy, probably my age. He wore a hat and black clothes. "What do you want?" I questioned.

"Here," he removed his hand from the door and handed me a paper. "The boss is waiting."

My heart did a deep dive when I saw the name on the paper. Of course. I knew he wouldn't just leave us alone. When I raised my eyes, the guy was just walking away.

I turned around at the sound of P'Arthit in the bedroom and didn't try to call after him.

"What's wrong," he appeared at the door a moment later. "You still haven't closed the door? Did someone come?"

I didn't know what was written in the paper, I needed to know first before I tell P'Arthit. I knew I had to tell him my secret before it was too late, but what If like my mother P'Arthit tells me to marry Anya. No, that's what he would do. P'Arthit would not understand that I never meant to sleep with Anya, that I don't even remember sleeping with Anya, that I don't love her. He would only see my betrayal, the worst one because I lied to him and I kept it a secret, and he would only see that he doesn't have a place in my life. He would definitely leave me, so I can't tell him about this paper until I know what is inside.

"No, no one came"

"Then close the door already, what are you thinking about?"

I smiled insincerely and closed the door. He too closed the room door and I was left alone. I folded the paper and tucked into my pocket then I put it out of my mind for later.

"Delicious," P'Arthit praised as he licked a sweet rib, "Kongpob, you have really come a long way from the boy who can't boil water," he said.

"When I have a boyfriend like this why won't I learn?"

"A boyfriend like this? You mean a caring and nice boyfriend?"

"No, a lazy and helpless boyfriend. P'Arthit, you don't even clean up after eating."

He frowned and threw the bone on the plate, "what? I cleanup,"

"Really?"

"Yeah... but I'm tired now so leave it till tomorrow," he said in sing song.

"No, clean up now." I did the same thing.

He sighed, "it's not like it would go bad if we wash it in the morning."

"The house will smell and you will invite rats."

"Okay, okay, I will clean up."

I rose to start gathering the plate but he stopped me." no, I will do it," he pointed at himself, "I need points too."

"Points for what?"

"To be a counted as a caring boyfriend too, what else?"

I narrowed my eyes suspecting him. "Don't want me to help?"

"No, relax, go watch TV." he gathered the plates and muttered under his breath," but you used so much plates. Why use so much plate."

I chuckled and moved to help him out, taking the plates to the sink. He didn't allow me to wash them though.

"So how is your father?" he asked.

"Fine," I said, "he still isn't speaking yet. I think if the problem continues we would have to take him back to the hospital."

"I hope he starts talking, "he said softly.

"I know." I was saddened by the burden this has placed on P'Arthit. If my father loses his ability to speak P'Arthit would blame himself forever.

I moved forward and wrapped my arms around his waist and he jumped splashing water on the floor. "Kongpob, don't just do that without warning."

His voice sounded lively so he wasn't too depressed then. I bit his ear, "can't you focus if I hold you like this?"

"Eh? No way, that's why I said you should go to the living room and watch TV."

"Don't want to," I said stubbornly jotting my lip forward.

"So am I supposed to wash the plates like this?" his bewildered look was funny so I kissed his cheek and pulled away.

"Who was the person who dropped you off?" I asked.

"Who?" his brows furrowed then relaxed, "oh, that's Pete. He is..." he paused.

"He is what?"

"nothing." He said. "Can you dry the plates if you are not going to go away?"

"Now you are asking for my help? I thought you were gaining points."

"Points for what, most people like a slightly mean boyfriend."

I laughed, 'at least you know you are being mean."

We talked like this until it was time of bed. "So you are not going home?" he asked me looking anxious.

"Do you want me to go home?"

"Yes."

We looked at each other and I sighed and shrugged, "okay," I rose, "if that's what you want P'Arthit."

I got my phone and car keys and head for the door, but he caught my hand as I passed and I smiled at the door. "why are you holding my hand, P'Arthit?" I asked.

"hm, just wanted to say good night."

"Should I give you a goodnight kiss then?" I asked turning around. He blinked and looked slightly pink. "Or should I just stay."

"Do whatever you like, who is asking you for that?" He turned and went into the bedroom. I broke down laughing, God he is so adorable. I hurried after him and shut the door behind me.

When my eyes met his, all joke fled from me. The seriousness in his eyes and the desire made my mouth go dry. I reached him but he held a hand in front of me. We haven't done anything, not kiss or touched each other even after my father got out of the hospital but now I felt hungry. I needed P'Arthit so badly, but he was still keeping me away.

"Um," he looked a little flustered and said, "Your phone is ringing, has been ringing a lot."

"Really?" I hadn't heard it even though it was in my hand. I opened it and turned it off.

"Don't you have to answer?" he said and I shook my head as I threw the phone on the bed. "Its fine if I don't answer. Now, are you still going to keep making excuses?"

He paused then shook his head.

"Can I come?"

He nodded and I walked over and reached for him as he reached for me. Our lips met and it was filled with electricity, with passion. I never knew kissing, upon all the kisses we've shared, could still feel like this. Eight years of kissing this man and I still haven't had enough.

My arms circled his body as my mouth started to roughly kiss him. He groaned against my mouth and it vibrated through me. His fingers were in my hair pulling me deeper and deeper. I can't ever get out and I can't ever lose this. So no matter what I have to do, even if I have to change myself, I won't ever let him leave me or let anyone take my P'Arthit from me.

end note: notice that i took the liberty of naming Kong's sisters. i don't remember their names being mentioned in the series, if you do please inform me. thanks for reading.