「 i can see her body rushing into you, crashing on your skin, burning within, burning so deep 」

i just don't understand. how could you do something like this to me?

was any of what we had even real? were you even real? or have i just completely invented someone inside my head? is that how fucking lonely i've become?

you.

you.

you!

you of all people . . . i would've never expected something like this from you. there's just so many things you could've done to me. but this?

you're the one who told me you never thought of cheating on me. not once have you thought of that. and okay, maybe i am stupid for thinking that was true because obviously, we all do think of cheating on our significant other once in a while. some think about it more than others. some try to do anything to keep that away from their mind.

you're the one who always said you're different from other boys. you're different and you would never hurt me. you don't care about the sex more than the love. you actually care about me.

but what did you do?

you made up this whole story about your ex. you said you never see her anymore. it's been years since the last time you saw her. you said it's been years! you said that you had moved houses since then. so i assumed you now live far away from her.

but for me to find out she goes to your school? your school? oh my god! she's there! you see her every single day!

and i try so hard not to imagine it but all i can see in my brain is the two of you. you getting awkward and nervous when she passes you by the halls. that's if it is actually true that you never speak anymore.

but what if you do? what if you do still speak? what if you are friends? what if you are even more than friends?

i can't take it. i can't take it.

the image of you and her, i can't get it out of my head. you kissing her. touching her. eating her out. fingering her. thrusting into her and fucking her just the way you told me you would fuck me one day. groaning into her ear as you reach your climax. calling her "baby". telling her you love her and no one else but her and that you'd marry her one day.

i see it when i close my eyes and i want to think crying could help me get that image out of my head, but it just make me hurt even more.