Client: camillarb5

Reviewer: rinaXhazurina

Title: 5/5

A suiting title not only summarizes the plot of the story but also wisely chooses to do so through alliteration with the appropriate words 'deadline' and 'desire.' It was very creative and satisfying to hear and read. It also hints well at the story's intended theme, genre, and ambiance of business-related conflict along with a steamy romance.

Book Cover: 5/5

The cover fits the theme, plot, and genre proposed by the title and the blurb. The stylistic design hints at its romantic yet professional ambiance, leaving room for steam. The font choices are good and the use of a single color for all the texts is simple but appropriate to be visible against the background.

Blurb: 5/5

The blurb is well done. It explains the character's conflicts both internal and external which are very relatable and relevant to this modern era for its corporate competition. Alice's character is presented as ambitious and diligent struggling against the stern Ethan whose character is also exhibited explicitly. The unexpected event to venture to France indicates a clear change in the tense relationship between the two significant characters which indicates the main excitement of the story and thus, makes readers want to know more. Despite the anticipated blooming romance between them, the slow-burn and grounded and relevant situation promises a unique execution of the trope.

Characters: 10/10

Alice as a main character is executed well in aligning her desires and flaws with the plot and chosen setting. It's clear she wants the promotion and she and her characters mention it over and over again but unlike her, they repeatedly berate her on sacrificing her health for the sake of her goals rightfully so. The repetitive reprimand is logical because it's what close associates would do and reasonable for the same reason, so points for that storywise. Even so, Alice justifies it but even she and the readers know her actions are not good for her, which makes readers care and root for her.

The story did well in revealing more about her such as placing her in interesting situations that push a person to think or act that reveals more about them. This is exemplified when Jenny asks Alice about the two dates and Alice's organized and pensive side is shown by addressing the dilemma by listing the pros and cons. Moreover, her character exploration was best shown through work and environment, which is probably the most natural way to get to know a person in real life seen in Alice's silent suffering in Ethan's presence and her messy room, further supporting the fact that she is that much of a busy woman.

Alice is also brave for including her self-expression. It is a relatable moment of struggle, risking her efforts for her goal, putting the character in a dilemma in choosing between what she thinks is best and the decree of the controlling forces around her. That is, Ethan. The supporting characters are dynamic, making them distinguishable from each other while not overstepping Alice's role as the main character.

The opposite nature between Alice and Jenny is highlighted greatly by their actions and dialogues, making a good example of showing over telling. While Jenny may be a controversial person, she is genuinely and surprisingly a good friend Alice may not deserve seeing that she continues her self-destructive nature, but Jenny is patient with her and does more than consoling and scolding her when she carries out acts of service for Alice, contrasting what is typically associated with people like her. This makes Jenny likable and her antics contribute to its humorous moments. Carol is also intriguing by the choice of making her pregnant, making her stand out among the others but the fact that she also cares for Alice's wellbeing by suggesting she takes a rest and she'll make the excuse to Ethan makes her immediately likable. Her motherly side is shown in this, presenting another type of woman in the corporate community.

Alice is the hard-working, ambitious employee, Jenny is the controversial woman, and Carol who is known for her motherly and anticipated maternal role. Their interactions are coherent with their established characters as well as how they respond in given situations, making them dynamic and believable as people. It's also refreshing that the main character doesn't totally dislike relationships. It is not for the exaggerated reasons typically seen in romance novels but because she just doesn't condone casual flings and prioritizes her work, which makes it, again, believable as shown through her self-destructive behaviors for the sake of work. She's having a hard time following her friend's advice, so how can she manage a serious relationship when she can't take care of herself? That thought makes her more grounded and thus, makes readers care for her more.

As for Ethan, he is seen to be unpredictable through Alice's POV, though she anticipated this from her but even the readers can understand her surprise and frustrated reactions when he suddenly asks or mentions an immediate work or meeting she has to work on just after accomplishing a nearly impossible task. He is seen as this shallow, cold person in the first several chapters but given that the book mentions it is a slow-burn, it is expected. While Alice may perceive him to be perfect, it is that very same fact that sows curiosity among the characters and readers as to how he handles work flawlessly, which appears impossible so the story also hints at Ethan's hidden struggles to be explored when they enter France. For now, while he may come off as shallow in the first several chapters, he isn't bad as a character as his rigid personality serves a significant role in the main character's life: being the main source of her external struggle. So overall, the story does an excellent job of writing relevant and modern characters.

Worldbuilding: 9/10

The classic workplace and Alice's messy table contrast with that and her studio place are the right story sites for the characters in alignment with its major corporate element. The details presenting their neatness/mess further immerse readers into the condition of these areas such as Alice's work spot filled with sticky notes. The worldbuilding is also good as it represents the character's conditions. These functions of the worldbuilding are good, though I suggest establishing how the area affects the characters more or how it makes them feel such as how Ethan's prestigious office makes her feel small and more ashamed when she enters with a ripped skirt. Another is the sensory details of the environments are also good though I suggest adding at least one accentuating sense for each area so that readers can immediately associate what being in the place feels like such as Alice's spot and how it is plastered with sticky notes. It's not strongly suggested but it's good practice.

Writing Mechanics and Style: 14/15

The writing mechanics are good with little to no errors that can be fixed with cautious proofreading. The writing style is appropriate for its genre, which makes it easy to catch up on and adjust to for its simplicity. Writing it in the first-person POV is, personally, the best option because it further delves into the serious and relevant struggle Alice is facing which many people nowadays also experience. Overall, both aspects are good; it follows the standard structure of writing and it is easy to read with the simple use and weave of words and sentences. The writing style is on-point for its intended audience, making it more easily understandable with the analogies used.

Overall Engagement: 4/5

The engaging factor of this story was the characters, their unique, believable, and autonomous personalities, and their relationships with each other that bring out its appealing humor and serious topics that should be tackled instead of ignored like Alice's self-destruction. It's clearly for people seeking romantic tensions in the corporate setting that gradually explores the characters individually, their relationships, and the rising, anticipated steam, and romance between the main character and the love interest. Moreover, it's specifically suited for people who aren't only in for the romance but also value an in-depth exploration of its characters and relate to them in some ways. It's a unique romance book because clearly it doesn't only focus on the genre like most but it also takes time to patiently and honestly dive into the characters for readers to connect with, make it grounded, and culminate to its exciting chemistry.

However, the engagement eventually becomes stagnant because though the story moves slow, each scene should still have at least a small amount of significant, observable change either to the characters, the world, or the plot. I understand that the first several chapters explore how gruel Alice's problems are but there should be signs of change among the story elements that can be distinguished before and after the scene occurred.

Pacing: 15/15

An appropriate slow burn recommendable for those wanting to read a gradual enemies-to-lovers relationship buildup, which I could only hope the book will be able to fulfill at the end. I'm rooting for it considering how, again, good it was in establishing character diversity, relationships, and interactions with others, their situation, and the environment. The pacing is good as it really delves deep into Alice's internal and external challenges with thorough details that really put her out to be fleshed out and connected to the readers.

Execution: 17/20

There is a lot to admire about how the tropes of characters and the plot was executed. First is about Alice again with how relatable and relevant her struggles are, and her complex friend Jenny and the motherly Carol. These two frequently present women along with the main character show the three types of women in the workplace, adding to the dynamic character and relationship structure they all embody. Ethan and his character being the sole reason for Alice's hardship also adds to a good execution where it really shows how much of a cold and uncaring person he is that delivers the intended emotion of how readers feel about him through his actions and Alice's reactions. It's not all talk about how horrible he is but it really shows how that case is. Keep this show-over-tell technique throughout and you're on the right path of keeping good character writing.

Another is how the environment, as I said again before, really reflects the character's personalities or moods. The dialogue is well-done for how consistent it is written for how each character speaks according to their established personality and the interaction that comes out of it is just as coherent. This is seen through Alice's question about whether relationships are supposed to be serious when she tackles Jenny's topic about casual flings. The reaction that comes out of her is understandable where she is seen to be a bit ticked off but considering they're best friends, she didn't have an explosive reaction. Another is Carol and her authoritative delivery when she said Alice should go rest, but this expression comes from a caring perspective so we understand that along with Alice. This is different from the authoritative way how Ethan speaks where it's believable that he appears uncaring toward her because of how many times the words that come out of his mouth are about a work to be done sooner than Alice can handle.

The dialogue is outstanding because it's natural and you can feel the emotions within it laced with the characters' moods. The humor is always spot-on like how Alice cuts off Jenny before she continues a detailed sex thing which further shows her disposition of being uncomfortable discussing thorough topics of such. Keep it up as well; you're doing a good job.

The significant gap for improvement is how it falls short of the apparent changes. Though again, while the pacing is intended to be slow, I suggest its gradual pacing must also serve to contribute to the change that took place in almost all of the scenes.

Theme: 25/25

The corporate ladder conflict setting and the ambitious motivation of the main character make for a good theme of how many work industries and not just office types push people into sacrificing their overall personal health with a false or distant promise of a better outcome. It is a very significant issue that should be tackled more often in this present era as it is seen in the academic institutions alone with how students are forced to work to the bone at the expense of their health considering their growing bodies which often leads to terminal illnesses.

Alice epitomizes these specific yet many types of people where dreams can drive them to reach a point of destroying their physical and mental health. The way how much she pushes herself gives her friends and the readers a reasonable feeling of disappointment toward her but the disposition comes from a concerned and sympathetic place because who doesn't feel that way when someone you care for intentionally does this to themselves?

In conclusion, the unity of the story elements: the characters, setting, plot, and pacing not only contributed to its coherence and interrelated effects with each other, but it also served to put out an essential theme of balancing personal health and work/academic life anyone can understand and strive to grow out of in this current era.