If there was someone that Wang Yibo trusted fully – it was Mr. Dingle Peach. He had never let him down. And right now, Wang Yibo was following him – securely tucked inside a back pack – behind Fu Yao.

"How do you know that Zhan-ge might be here?"

They stood in front of a house quite close to the rehabilitation center. Fu Yao seemed to be familiar with the place. She gestured Wang Yibo to ring the bell and he did.

"Zhan-gege told me if I need him and can't get a hold of him, I must come here."

His heart was pounding, thrilling and nervous. Just a door way, him and Xiao Zhan.

When the door opened, Fu Yao immediately hugged the legs of the tall man that stepped out.

"Haitao gege!"

Huh?

. . .

There were spots of colors and splashes of paint on the vinyl floor. Few pages blew with the wind and gathered on top of the man that had been lying here. His breathing was rhythmic to the flowy curtains and in his hand was a little stalk of dry flower – the chrysanthemum.

[Flashback]

It looked like the like the droplets of rain – black and frozen – captured on a sheet. Everyday when he opens his eyes, it's the same view he gets to see. He had seen it too much, that he could even count the spots on individual tile with his closed eyes.

Everyday had been the same. He wakes up. He breathes. And he sleeps again.

When sorrow strikes, misery takes refuge

"Today, they are serving soup. Would you like to try drinking it by yourself?" she was a newly recruited helper. And she came with the passion of changing the world. But every time she entered his room, all of her spirit leave like deflated balloon.

It takes him so much effort to nod his head, why did she have to test him like that everyday? When especially the result would be the same.

He moved his hand, skinny as bone to pick up the spoon. Maybe the metal was too slippery? Maybe he didn't insert much force? But the utensil slipped right through his fingers and fell on the floor.

"Ah! It's okay, I will wash it." The kind caretaker took the fallen spoon to clean it.

There was a fly that came to drink the soup but somehow it ended up falling into it. When the caretaker arrived back, she decided to feed the teenager by herself. He couldn't even tell her that the spoon she fed him had a fly in it.

That was his life now. He was helpless beyond need.

"Caihong, could you call Haitao? Xiao Zhan needs to change his clothes." The caretaker said clearing away the bowl.

"He's on his way, An Bai." Caihong informed.

For things like changing clothes and using the bathroom, Haitao was appointed for Xiao Zhan while An Bai was responsible for other necessities like massage, food and medicine.

"Ah, you peed again?" Haitao said. Xiao Zhan's body had gone so numb that he lost focus on what he was even doing.

"So..ry" he could only apologize in remorse. But it had happened so many times now, that he even the words of forgiveness refused to form in this throat. At some point, he gave up.

"It's alright, Xiao Zhan." Haitao smiled. Unlike An Bai and Caihong, Haitao was a volunteer there. And it always made him feel worst – An Bai and Caihong would get a pay at least, for helping his helpless self. But Haitao, he would receive nothing out of his efforts on him.

Unwanted kindness is unbearable burden

"it's has gotten fairly hot. Want me to turn on the fan?" Haitao finished changing Xiao Zhan into new sets of clothes. Xiao Zhan tilted his head towards the window.

"Ah, then I will open the window." Haitao did as he said. "Tomorrow, you're going to the main branch for some checkups. Doctors are going to run some tests on you." It's been more than a year but instead of getting better, Xiao Zhan had only gotten worst. He didn't have any physical condition that needed to be operated that was he was sent to the rehabilitation center to regain the strength in his limbs.

The cool breeze of window made the room slightly breathable. Xiao Zhan closed his eyes and wander off to sleep.

. . .

It was gold, a little yellow, some parts were red and purple even. The setting sun looked this rich, Xiao Zhan didn't know. Before the flood, he was too happy to look and after the flood, he was too suffocated to see.

He was wheeled to the main branch. They did tests on him and Haitao went to get something to drink for Xiao Zhan. He was sitting in his wheelchair silently gazing at the setting sun.

Tomorrow, he would be back to seeing that same ceiling again. When would he get to come out next? Or even if?

"Why don't you cry?"

It was small voice, sweet but solid. Xiao Zhan turned his gaze to the source and he saw a little boy of 12 or 13 years old, standing close by. There were marks of cannula needles and tape on his arms. But he wasn't wearing the hospital gown. He probably got discharged that day.

"Hm?" The only words that Xiao Zhan could utter. The little boy came forward, standing exactly in front of the setting sun. The little one pointed at his heart. The big bandage could be seen from the neck of his shirt.

"if it hurts here. You just cry."

Having received no answer, the little fella tried again,

"When I cry, mama and papa give me a hug then everything feels better." He said swinging his hand.

"N-no, ma...pa." Xiao Zhan conveyed. He hadn't shed a single tear since the flood. He hadn't cry even once. maybe his ability to cry had also gone numb.

When the small sun heard that reply, his eyebrows furrowed. He was thinking hard on next solution, what should a person do when there are no parents to hug away the pain? Then it clicked,

"Then I can let you hug me." He chimed, opening his arms. His honey brown eyes seemed to have replaced the jewel in the sky.

He moved forward and gave Xiao Zhan a hug.

Maybe he had stayed too long under the sun, but Xiao Zhan could feel some warmth in his numb body.

"Oh wait!" the boy immediately let go and ran to the distance. The touch was too short but it was the first fondness he felt after months.

He was back as fast as he ran, he breathed in, " I was not supposed to run this fast, don't tell my mom okay."

The side of his lips curled into a small smile and Xiao Zhan answered through his eyes.

"Here! It's kritiyum!" a yellow flower, similar to the sun was held in his tiny little hands. He had gotten a whole bouquet of it when his NaiNai came to visit but since he was discharged today, he didn't need it anymore. And if he had brought the whole bouquet, Nainai would have asked him so many questions which he didn't want to answer. He initially snuck out three flowers. One he dropped when he was hiding from Nainai, the other one? He didn't seem to recall where it went, its just when he saw, there was only one flower left in his hand.

"Chrysanthemum..." it was a first full world that Xiao Zhan had spoken.

"Cry which mom?" the little child asked. This gege was so weird, first he wouldn't speak but when he did, it didn't make any sense.

Xiao Zhan pushed his trembling hands forward, slowly reaching out to the golden petals. It looked like the light of the day had been captured into this flower. It was so beautiful. It was so warm.

Before he could attempt to utter some words, there was a call for the child in the background.

'Yibo! Where did you run off to? Come back we're leaving!'

"Oh No! I gotta go!" the child gasped and ran to the horizon as the sun.

A droplet like a rain escaped from his eyes. It brought together a whole cascade of emotions.

Somewhere in the distance Haitao sighed of relief. "He finally cried."

[Flashback ends]

Xiao Zhan woke up with a gasp. He looked around and he had created a mess again. He securely put the stalk of flower inside a frame and begun to collect the papers which lay discarded.

He was back in his hometown – Zhengzhou. The people that used to walk in the house, were now a mere painting on the canvass. At first the house felt too empty so Xiao Zhan started to fill it with the memories. He begun to paint. He colored the walls, sketched on the doors, he splattered on the floor and even painted on the ceiling. When he ran out of the space, he started painting on himself.

There is a small tattoo of the chrysanthemum flower on his chest.

He would color it in like some sort of coloring book. We would let it dry. And they he would wash it off.

But he stopped doing that ever since he met his chrysanthemum in real life.

He didn't recognize him at first, in fact, he still believed that the influence of Yibo made him alter the original memory because that's how badly he wanted it to be.

But it is only with the heart that one can see rightfully

There was a huge canvass, prepared and wet – waiting for him to heed his call. Xiao Zhan picked up the brush and begun to paint again. It's the painting where he had been unleashing all of his emotions for past one month.

His thoughts would start from the munchkin and wander off to the past, sometimes he would recall the memories of his hometown, sometimes his mind would be filled with silence but no matter where his mind raced to, it always came back to kitten he had been raising.

"I wonder if he's cursing again." He mumbled but unexpectedly his muttering was answered.

"Well, what the math do you think?"

Xiao Zhan turned around; his breath held in.

"Yibo!"

The man he called was standing, firmly with his strength. If it was Yibo from the first month in rehabilitation center, he would've cursed without a thought.
But now, Mr. Dingle Peach and Fu Yao were here, he had to be considerate.

"Gege!" the little one called for her attention.

"Fu Yao." Xiao Zhan looked in disbelief. "H-How?"

Then the next man answered his query, "Yo!"

"Haitao gege?"

"Ah sorry, I somehow got dragged into this." Haitao scratched his head and bowed apologetically. Xiao Zhan could only shook his head. But afterwards, he didn't know how to look back at Wang Yibo. But that teenager was now an independent netizen – a man. As he would like to call himself.

"Zhan-ge, I thought you didn't like to clutter."

His studio was total in contrast with his apartment.

Xiao Zhan looked at Haitao and the man took action, "Come on, Fu Yao let's get some ice cream." They'd need it after their talk.

"Okay!" Fu Yao beamed and the two left the studio house.

For a brief moment, there was only the aroma of paint in the air. Both had so many thoughts piled on top of each other, they didn't know how to even begin.

"Your leg...is it better now?"

"I don't know. You might have to give me feedback on the street battle next week."

Xiao Zhan looked up in surprise

"Y-you...You're going to dance again?" His voice elated, appeased.

Just his voice told him, how much Xiao Zhan valued his love for dance. It was unlike anyone else. Wang Yibo looked down, his eyes glistening with remorse, he repented,

"Zhan-ge, I'm sorry." He met his gaze and apologized, "I'm sorry for all the things I said, I'm sorry for hurting you like this. You were right." He admitted, "I am shallow. I called people hypocrites, I hated them with my core but in reality, I was afraid to admit that I was spitting image of it."

The tears of anguish left his eyes, they formed a stream on his cheeks.

"I still can't bring myself to look in the mirror." if he did that, he would have to admit how weak he really was. He had looked down on himself too much, he didn't know how to look up again.

His wail was so painful that his (XZ) body moved on its own and before he could register it, he had already captured the younger in an embrace.

"And you were right too, Yibo. I am a coward." He held him tight as he revealed, "Ever since I learnt to look forward, I'm too afraid to look back."

If the storm doesn't go away, start dancing in the rain.

He undid the embrace. The two eyes gleamed in unspoken trail of the sparks that their beating hearts would resile.

"Yibo, you asked me if I would stay with you, even if you can't look in the mirror." he smiled, "But can I ask to stay with you, until you can, and even after that?"

"Y-you mean...Y-you." His eyes glazed, imbued with glints of hope and mixed in the cosmos of warmth.

"Wang Yibo." Xiao Zhan held his hand and guided him towards the big canvass. When they around to face it, the cosmos of warmth turned into the cascade of love. If each stroke was tinge of cocoon filled with love, then the ocean was lacking and the sky wasn't enough to grasp.

"I don't think I'd be able to finish this one." Xiao Zhan chuckled, "My feelings for you – they could never fit in one canvass."

The clouds dispersed, drifted away for the bright sky, the azure was dominated with the rainbow of love.

-----------------THE END--------------------------

Sorry for any errors and thank you for reading.

But it is only with the heart that one can see rightfully – Antonie De Saint