Three weeks later

"What would you like for lunch?" I looked at Brochan as I slipped the diaper bag strap over my shoulder.

He leaned over Maeve's bounce chair, smiling at the little girl. "Doesn't matter." He glanced at me, his smile warm before he reached down and picked Maeve up. "There's daddy's little girl!" He held her up and she cooed, reaching a sticky drool covered hand out towards him like she wanted to grab his face. "My little drool puss. I'm gunna eat you" He brought her down and kissed her cheek before making noming sounds as he buried his face into her little neck. She gave a screechy giggle, scrunching her legs up towards her chest before kicking with a wide and gummy smile. He chuckled as he pulled away from her, his expression soft with love as he looked at her.

I smiled as I watched them, a warm feeling growing in my chest. Chrissie had been a lucky female and I was so sorry she couldn't get to see her male like this. He was such a good father, so confident and attentive. Maeve wanted for nothing and he gave her all the love in the world.

"Come on, Menza, let's get home." His smile didn't lessen as he looked over at me, reaching out and gesturing for me to follow him. I nodded and followed behind him, giving a quick goodbye to Lisa. She nodded in acknowledgement but was looking at Brochan with slightly narrowed eyes, as if she were suspicious of him. I wanted to say something but I shook it off, we were getting along, I didn't want to ruin that.

I hurried after Brochan, waving at Ellie from where she was playing with a young toddler. She grinned at me and waved back before turning back to the little game her and the young male were playing. I followed Brochan out of the craft hall and turned my face towards the sun, enjoying the warmth of it on my face. I might have missed my home, missed Ellie and Simon, but I had been out in the territory more than I ever had living there. Between the craft hall and the weekly trips we made to the graveyard to visit with Chrissie, I had seen more of the territory in the past few months than I had in the last twenty years.

"She might be getting a tooth." Brochan's voice pulled me out of my thoughts and I nodded quickly. He threw me a smile over his shoulder and my heart fluttered and I nearly tripped at the feeling of butterflies that came through my stomach. He was such a handsome male and he was so sweet and kind. He had scared me when I first came into his care, he did, but he was smiling more and he was so nice to me. He would get me little hair care things from town when he went to get groceries and he was trying very hard to bring me into conversations and I felt more comfortable talking to him now but I wasn't used to that much kindness from males.

Simon's friends had always treated me like Simon's little sister, which was okay. Then there was the Beta who out right seemed to hate me. I wasn't sure why but I made an effort to not make eye contact or be anywhere close to him. Then there was the Delta. I shuddered at the thought of him, glancing over my shoulder to see if he was around. My heart jumped into my throat as I spotted him at the corner of the craft hall, his arms over his chest. He was looking at me, I knew he was and I shuddered. He made me so uncomfortable.

I quickened my pace, moving closer to Brochan as I did so. "He's staring at you again, isn't he?" Brochan's voice was low and edged with a dark sort of tone that made me shiver and I nodded, hunching my shoulders forward. I could feel the Delta's gaze between my shoulder blades like a knife trailing down my spine. It was chilling and terrifying. It felt like a threat. "Fucker." He spat the word out before he reached behind him and wiggled his fingers. I put my wrist in his grip and he gripped it firmly, pulling me a bit closer to him. The touch was almost comforting in a way, it made me feel safe. Brochan was there and that meant the Delta couldn't hurt me.

"Ignore him for now, Menza." At the words I nodded and kept my head bowed forward slightly and it took us walking on the wooded path towards home for that the itchy feeling along my spine to disappear. I let out a small breath of relief and Brochan let my wrist go before throwing a small look over his shoulder. "Are you alright?" He asked it so softly that my heart turned over in my chest and I couldn't help but nod. I knew I shouldn't put much stock into it. I was his ward, someone underneath his roof, but that look made me feel like he actually cared. "Let me know if he is sticking around where he shouldn't be. I'll take it up with the Alpha." His voice was firm, a curt nod following the words and I nodded in return.

Chrissie had been such a lucky female to have an honourable and kind male like Brochan. She really had and I felt a twinge of envy at not having that but I shook it off. I would much rather Chrissie be alive to be with her male and her daughter than for me to feel envious about their love. I mourned for the female, for the little girl that would grow up without her mother, much like I had. The ever familiar pain in my chest sharpened to a point and jabbed at me with the thought and I pushed it away. It wasn't about me but I was glad I was able to empathize with Maeve, to help her when she got older.

"Have you thought about what you want for lunch?" I asked it again, watching Brochan's back. He had grown larger, packing on some more muscles. His shirt was looser than some others he had worn but it still stretched across his shoulders, showcasing the breadth of them rather well. He was a large male. He really was. It made me feel positively tiny compared to him, granted I wasn't big to begin with but still.

"Don't worry about it." He threw me another smile over his shoulder and I felt my cheeks heat up slightly. I felt embarrassed, I didn't really like this giddy butterfly feeling he gave me. He was nice to me but that didn't mean I could get flustered about it or enjoy it too much. He was in mourning, he was grieving, something I knew very well. I liked him and he was handsome but there was nothing there. I kept telling myself that again and again and again. It was just because he was nice, it was misplaced for me to feel like that and it was probably because he was nice to me.

I shook my head slightly. I needed to think about what he would like for lunch. He said not to worry about it but I couldn't help it. I still needed to be busy and useful and needed to ensure my place under his roof was warranted. I didn't want to be a burden.

Worthless

The word still had as much sting as it did the first time my mind hissed it at me. I didn't want it to be right but it was hard. My father had given me my value and it was a negative number. I had to do everything I could to ensure that Brochan wouldn't only use that value in his interactions with me. I had to do everything I could to continue to make everything better, to make myself less of a burden to him. I let out a small sigh, I had to keep doing as I was. Brochan was nice to me, so utterly kind, but I didn't ever want to make him feel like I wasn't doing my part to lessen the burden that I was.

"Here we go!" Brochan had a lightness to his voice as he turned, sweeping his arm out. I stopped and looked at him, unsure of what he meant. "I hope you like it." He smiled at me and my heart gave that silly little flutter and the butterflies returned and I swallowed hard, trying to stomp the feelings out before I glanced by him. I froze and blinked rapidly. The blue checkered table cloth was laid out on the front lawn and there were plates and bowls with food laying out on it and I blinked. "I know it's not a heavy meal, just some sandwiches and some fruits and veggies but I thought it was nice." He reached out and motioned me forward with his fingers.

I stared at the set up before looking at him with a heavy dose of confusion. I didn't know what he wanted or what was really going on. He smiled at me a bit wider. "It's a picnic, Menza. You've been cooped up in the craft hall and the house for weeks now so I thought you would like being outside for a bit." The words made me blink rapidly. He made me a picnic. A warmth spread from my chest outwards to me fingers and toes.

A picnic.

I beamed up at him, unable to help myself. "Thank you." I put all the happiness and sincerity that I could into the thank you. I had never had a picnic before. I felt giddy and excitement bloomed inside me as I moved over to the tablecloth.

Brochan cleared his throat and followed me. "I'm glad you like it. It's the least I could do." His voice was a bit gruff and I clasped my hands together and smiled at him again. My cheeks nearly hurt I was smiling so wide. "Go ahead, sit down." I did as he directed and adjusted my skirt so it sat properly before I clasped my hands together in my lap. I watched as Brochan sat down, adjusting Maeve so she could sit on his lap. She blew a wet raspberry and smacked his legs with her little sticky hands. "I didn't make anything fancy. I used the rest of the ham and turkey in the fridge though. So we should get that written down on the grocery list." I nodded my agreement, waiting patiently, watching him. He grabbed a sandwich and gestured at me with it. "Dig in."

At the words I nodded and picked up a sandwich for myself. I took a bite of it and hummed to myself. This was nice. I had never had a picnic before. I knew what they were but I never expected anyone to put one together for me. I was more likely to put food together for one rather than to get one for myself.

"It's good." I smiled at him and he nodded, his cheeks a touch pink.

He shrugged, "Eh, I had to pull out the top of my culinary skills for this one." His tone was a bit teasing and I laughed, unable to stop myself. Brochan had more skills than simply sandwiches. He could make chili, soups, steak, and so much more. He was a very good cook. "You laughed." His voice was soft and low and I stopped, covering my mouth with my hand, looking at the checkered table cloth. "It's nice to hear you laugh. Mene knows this house needs a bit more laughter." I glanced up at him as he said it and he gave me a slightly reassuring smile that made me relax.

"You don't smile much either." He looked away from me, his eyes on Maeve as she grabbed at feet, one of her socks already off and her other hand grabbing at her bare toes. "It's a shame because you have a really sweet smile." He took a big bite of his sandwich and I felt my cheeks flare with heat at the compliment. No one had ever given me such a sweet compliment before and my heart twisted and flipped in my chest. I swallowed hard and turned back to my sandwich, wishing my cheeks would stop feeling super heated. It was a little ridiculous I thought. He was being nice but that didn't mean anything.

"Did you pack some food for the little miss?" I looked around for anything that Maeve could eat. She was just starting on purees and she loved them.

He nodded, reaching over and picking up a small container. "Snagged some of that mashed banana with brown rice you made for her this morning." He gave it a small shake and I nodded, taking another bite of my sandwich before looking around and grabbing a small spoon. Brochan held the small container out towards me and I set my sandwich down on a close by plate. I took the container and opened it, taking out a small spoonful as I chewed my bite of sandwich.

Maeve must have understood what it was because she screeched, kicking out her legs and waving her hands, her eyes intent on the spoon. I smiled at her and brought the spoon to her mouth. She made a little growling sound as she nearly lunged at the spoon, practically shoving it in her mouth. She grabbed it with her little hand and I giggled, trying to take it away from her.

"Vicious little beast you are." Brochan chuckled, helping me get the spoon from her hand. She gave an upset screech and Brochan bounced her slightly. "You would think we starve you with how upset you are." He was smiling down at her and I grabbed another spoonful and fed it to her.

She was such a sweetheart and she screeched and growled, cooing occasionally as I fed her the rest of the puree. Once the container was empty I closed it and set it and the spoon on an empty plate as she yawned. I smiled at her, my heart clenching in my chest at just how sweet she was. I adored her and her cute little nose and her giggles and her trying so hard to talk to us. She was growing so much too, she was so much bigger than when I had been given to Brochan. I picked up my sandwich, going back to eating as Brochan talked to her, eating his own lunch.

Once I was done the sandwich I started to clear up some of the plates and Brochan waved his hand at me, shaking his head. "Don't worry about it, Menza. I'll take care of it after." He gave me a small smile as he said it and I nodded even though a bit of anxiety twisted at me. I wanted to clean up, to make sure I wasn't a burden but he had told me. "Have some of the fruit." He reached over and picked up a container of fruit and set it in front of me before he tickled Maeve's tummy, sending her into a giggle fit. I smiled at them both as I picked out an apple slice and took a bite.

This was such a nice day and I knew I would remember it for such a long time. It was nice to hear Maeve giggle, to see Brochan so happy with her. I knew he was hurting, there was so much grief inside of him but he was happier now, he didn't... brood nearly as much. He still had his moments when he drank or when the grief looked like it threatened to crush him but I tried my best to help. But this moment, where he was smiling at Maeve as she was giggling and the picnic, it would be a memory I knew I would cherish always.

I finished the apple slice and grabbed a grape as Brochan lifted Maeve into the air, bouncing her until she squealed out her laughter. I giggled as I watched them both, Brochan chuckling as he kissed the tip of her nose before bouncing her in the air again.

"Well this is fun." Simon's voice had my head snapping up and he waved at me, sauntering over the lawn towards us. Brochan's mood immediately darkened and I felt a pang of disappointment that the niceness of the day was quickly swallowed by a rather cold hostility.

"What do you want?" Brochan ground it out, his jaw ticking and Simon shrugged as he came over. I looked down at the small container of fruit and swallowed hard, knowing Brochan was just going to be upset more.

He leaned over and kissed my cheek as he sat down beside me. "Wanted to gossip cause I'm bored." He shrugged and I clasped my hands together on my lap, keeping my head bowed. I knew that Brochan was more irritated with Simon but I was the reason Simon kept coming around so I couldn't help but feel a bit responsible.

"You have friends for that." There was a clear warning to Brochan's voice that mixed with the sharp edge it had.

"Yes. Ennie-Ennie-Enza is my friend. Hence gossiping." Simon wrapped an arm around my shoulders, tugging me close before he kissed my cheek again. He let me go with a firm but comforting rub across my back. "Ooh, fruit!" Simon reached for the container sitting in front of me.

Brochan let out a low growl as he snapped out his hand and grabbed Simon's wrist, halting him from grabbing the fruit. "Not yours." The words were clipped before he shoved Simon's hand away. He grabbed the container and reached further, setting it on my lap. "Those are for Menza." It came out clipped before he grabbed the veggie tray and shoved it across the tablecloth towards Simon.

"Eat that." I swallowed hard and looked at the container of fruit on my lap. I wasn't quite sure what to say or feel with that. "I cut that up for you, Menza, go ahead." He reached out and patted my knee and I lifted my head, giving him a tentative smile. He didn't return it but gave a small nod.

"Fine. I need more veggies anyway." Simon grumbled a bit but bumped his shoulder against mine in an almost friendly manner before he grabbed a baby carrot. "So. The new Master-At-Arms is totally gunna be challenged for his position." Simon dove right into talking, gesturing at times with whichever veggie he was eating as he told me about what his friends were doing for the day and how Lisa and father weren't talking and how poorly the new Master-At-Arms was handling the training. I closed my eyes as I continued to eat the fruit, letting Simon's voice roll over me. It was comforting for me to have him talk to me. I had missed him, a lot.

"What was that?" Brochan's snapped the words out and I jolted, my eyes snapping open as I looked between him and Simon. He was staring at Simon, his jaw ticking as he held Maeve to his shoulder, the little girl clearly tired.

"I was just saying that Alpha is talking really fucking weird about her." Simon pointed a celery stick at Maeve and Brochan let out a low growl. Simon didn't seemed bothered by that as he took a bite of the celery stick. "Trade you a tomato for that last apple slice." He smirked at me as he pointed to the granny smith apple slice in my container on my lap and Brochan made a noise low in his throat.

"Explain." He snapped it out and Simon slowly looked at him, a sneer on his face.

"I like apples." At the words my eyes widened slightly. Simon was just being combative at this point and I wasn't sure how that made me feel. It was a nice picnic, he didn't need to make it worse.

"Whelp." Brochan's agitation was increasing and I swallowed hard gripping my skirt tightly in my hand as I looked between the two males.

"Mene, you have no sense of humor." Simon rolled his eyes, clearly either ignoring Brochan's agitated state or simply not caring about it.

"Explain." Brochan's bass voice rumbled with the growl that came out with the words. I bit my tongue to keep from telling Simon to stop being difficult and just tell him. I wasn't to speak for Brochan and I knew he wouldn't like me interfering.

"There is talk around the pack that he is fixated on your daughter. Something about how she's the only baby to survive the plague and that she and the ranks will usher in a new age for the Old Ways once she reaches the age of fertility." Simon finished his celery stick, making a slight face as he muttered about hating celery. "As I said, talking really fucking weird." He gave another lazy shrug before he made another face. "I thought it sounded more like potentially make her a broodmare for the ranks but I'm not about to throw that shit out there and get tossed in the cages for a few weeks." He held out a tomato for me and I took it, watching Brochan and him intently as Simon snagged the apple slice from my container.

"He can get fucked." Brochan's voice was vicious and I swallowed hard, letting the tomato drop into the container as my stomach knotted up at the tone.

I felt very wary and wanted it all to stop so I opened my mouth then closed it before taking a bolstering inhale. "Perhaps there was something lost along the line? Something that got exaggerated or confused?" I kept my tone soft, my heart in my throat as Brochan turned those angry eyes on me. "I doubt the Alpha would do something like that to such a young female." I was nearly whispering it, my hands clasped so tightly together my knuckles were pale. "It's not right." I knew what the Alpha had done to me but that was different. I was worthless, I was a half-breed that was half-black. I wasn't worth nearly as much as Maeve.

I glanced between Simon and Brochan and Brochan frowned a bit more. Neither of them look too convinced but they said nothing and then Brochan he reached over and grasped my knee, giving it a small squeeze. "I appreciate you giving your perspective on the situation." He kept his voice soft and I nodded, giving him a tentative smile. "Do you mind taking Maeve into the house? She needs to go down for a nap." He let my knee go and then adjusted Maeve before holding her out towards me. I nodded quickly, setting the fruit container off to the side before getting to my knees and taking Maeve. She was just about asleep and I got to my feet, holding her close as I rocked her.

I glanced down at Simon, wanting to say my goodbye in case he wasn't here when I came back out but the words died on my tongue as he looked between Brochan and I, the same expression on his face that Lisa had earlier. That suspicious sort of curiosity. I swallowed hard, not sure what to think about that other than he really did look like Lisa with that expression on his face.

"I'll see you later, fluff for brains." He said it off handedly, staring hard at Brochan with narrowed eyes. I nodded and quickly carried Maeve to the house. Brochan was right, she needed a nap and I honestly didn't want to discover just what it was Simon was trying to see between Brochan and I with that pinched look of suspicion.