Reviewed by: ChelleLynnWriting

Book Title: In the Stars

Author's Name: lostlovefairy

Chapter 1 - Chapter 5

Total: 78/100

At First Glance (Title/Cover/Blurb): 8/10

The title and main idea behind the story is a recipe for an adorable romance. Your blurb is well put together and gives a look at what the reader should expect. It could be reworked just a little to showcase your writing better, but that's a minor thing and a personal preference. Your cover is excellent quality and I like the sub-text, however the placement feels a bit off. Perhaps placing it above the title instead of in the middle.

What's Happening? (Plot): 18/20

The prologue is a nice introduction to the characters, but I recommend rewriting the ending of it if Mohan is the one who starts the marriage proposal. He clearly states "I wasn't marrying her if hell froze over." Yet the next thing we see from him is that he told his parents he wanted to meet with her. It's confusing. I like the first chapter a lot! Meera with her grandmother was a lovely opening scene, and it transitioned well into her being told she's to be married.

I love the thought of past lives and old soulmates! The way they both keep feeling pangs of electric while accidentally touching, and Mohan having vertigo after looking in her eyes, they're wonderful scenes! The plot moves along slowly in a way, but with enough of a build that the reader is entertained.

Go With the Flow (Grammar): 13/15

Your grammar is quite excellent! I don't have much to say on this subject other than this seems to be written for a very young adult audience (and I'm unsure if that's what you're going for.) A few more details, and some more substantial vocabulary could benefit this story.

Look How Far They've Come (Characters/Development): 8/10

The characters you've written are likeable and relatable. The urge Meela feels to get away from a family that doesn't understand why education is essential, and so is keeping one's independence, and the painful scar of past heartbreak that won't seem to heal that Mohan is facing are both woven very well within the story. Their friends are also a great group and I can't wait to see what kind of interactions they all have together. The mystery surrounding Meela's brother and father is shrouded in a way that makes me want to keep reading. There isn't much in the way of development so far, but there's promise that there will be as the chapters continue.

Out of this World (Worldbuilding): 6/10

Your world building feels minimal. The details given for scenes are written beautifully, and I would love for you to focus a bit more on the world as new places are introduced. You give visual descriptions, but try to imagine how a place smells, sounds, or even how the main character feels in the scene at the time.

I've Never Seen That Before! (Originality): 5/10

While this is written well, this story reads like every other arranged marriage trope. I like how it's hinting that they've been together before in a past life and that they're destined to be together, but that's also a very common trope. Of course, things wouldn't be tropes if people didn't like them!

I Need More! (Hook): 10/15

As wholesome and adorable as this story is starting out to be, it has a quality that makes it feel a little flat. The chapters are a bit small, slow, and there aren't many twists or hooks to keep the reader fully interested in continuing. Currently, the story is relying solely on someone enjoying the arranged marriage/soulmate romance.

Keep 'Em Coming (Overall Enjoyment): 10/10

Reading through the first five chapters was smooth! I had no issues reaching the end and even found myself reading it more than once. A few parts could use more fleshing out, and adding more feelings to your characters could add depth to the story and set it a notch higher, but otherwise this was a good story and I was pleased to review it!

Overall:

"In the Stars" by @lostlovefairy is a heartfelt arranged marriage romance story between a woman who wants out from under her family's thumb and a man who wants to move on from his past. The author has an easy to follow writing style that will have you feeling like you're relaxing instead of struggling to understand the plot. I recommend this to people looking for a soulmate trope story! 

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