9 years ago

It felt amazing to finally be out again; to be back by Jay's side. It was odd however for me that he let me back out again after such a short amount of time, especially since it was only yesterday that he told me I needed to rest up, but I wasn't going to complain of course. I missed this.

"I said hands above your head!" I scream as I look down at a man trembling in fear, a little boy that I assumed was his wrapping his arms around his father. It reminds me for a moment about my own parents, but I quickly push the memory away. "Don't move, got it?"

The man nods carefully as I narrow my eyes, turning around and looking back over my shoulder for Jay. He had thought that a simple task as robbing a bank would help get me back up to speed, so we were doing things the old fashioned way. Instead of racing in and out like what we usually did, he wanted to show me how to defend myself without using my speed, just in case I did happen to lose it at a not so good time.

So while he loaded the bags up with cash, I stood outside the vault and kept my eyes on the captives, making sure they didn't do something they'd regret. If they did, they'd have to deal with me, and then most likely didn't want that.

"Any day now!" I shout to Jay, wishing he would speed things along. I knew the police would be here soon, and I wasn't all that worried about them, but I was trying to see how long I could go without using my speed. I wanted to prove to Jay that I could do this on my own.

I hear him grumble slightly under his breath as I make a circle, making sure everyone was keeping their hands above their heads. It was then I turned and caught a young woman sitting there with her hand in her pocket, causing me to narrow my eyes as I walked over towards her. She notices me then and freezes, eyes wide in fear.

"Whatcha got there?" I say, a little too chipper for my taste. She doesn't say a word as I frown, using my gravity abilities to pull the object out from her pocket, letting it fly right into the palm of my hand.

When I pull the object down to figure out what it was, I was confused. It was something that I've never seen before; something that reminded me of something Harrison Wells would make. It looked like an ordinary ring, but instead of having a jewel as the center piece, it was some sort of glowing blue stone that didn't look normal to me.

"First time I've seen something like this before," I say as I slip the ring on my finger, holding it out while I admire the blue stone on my hand.

She flinches forwards but soon stops herself. "Please, I need that-"

"Bummer," I say, expressing the B as I lift my chin in a cocky manner. "Should have thought about that before reaching into your pocket."

"No, you don't understand," she breathes heavily then, her eyes warning me of something, but I wasn't afraid. "I need that back."

I stare at her for a long moment, not sure why she was looking at me the way she was. The way she said those words gave me a weird vibe that something bad was coming, but like I said, I wasn't scared. I was Silver Trickster; nothing scared me.

"If you won't give it back, then I'll just have to take it back," she says then, the last part of her words sounding way different than before. It sounded darker; much darker. It was then her eyes flashed to a white color, and that was when I realized she must be a metahuman.

I keep the ring on my finger as I take a step back, watching with wide eyes as smoke starts to form from her hands, but it wasn't really smoke. I didn't realize that it was mist until she throws some sort of icicle towards me, causing me to use my speed to dodge it. I know I said I wouldn't use my speed, but I also didn't expect some psycho ice lady to come after me.

"Not what I was expecting at all," I say carefully as I look back over at her, seeing her standing now. She lowers her head as she stares at me, icicles forming in her hands once again. "But I do love a challenge."

She bites her bottom lip then as she raises her chin, clearly more than angry. "I'll ask you one more time...give it back."

I slowly grab the ring on my finger, slipping it off. The woman smiles slyly as I hold it out, but there was no way in hell I was going to give it back. Just before she walks forwards to grab it, I take it back and shove it into one of the pockets I had on my suit, causing her to frown.

"Come and get it, Elsa."

-*+*-

Present

He was gone. Barry was really gone.

Watching Barry die in front of me was different from when my parents had died. That night, I didn't technically watch them die before my eyes like I did with Barry, they were just ripped away from me. Seeing Barry disintegrate like that...it left an emotion inside of me that I didn't realize I had. It was worse than the feeling when I had lost my parents, and that was the one thing that didn't make sense to me.

When I realized my parents were gone, I felt like I had wanted to scream. I had wanted to tear everything around me to shreds, but I composed myself. Hunter helped me through it, but mostly because he told me a white lie. He promised me that they were still out there and that I'd see them again, but that wasn't the truth.

But for Barry, I knew there was no white lie to tell. I watched him disappear before my very eyes, and there was no getting him back no matter what white lie I could have been told. Instead of wanting to scream and obliterate everything in my sight like I had with my parents, I just felt numb. I felt as if everything around me was diminishing away, leaving only me behind to live in eternal nothingness.

For the most part, my mind was blank as I laid here on top of one of the buildings in Central City, eyes distant as I stare up at the stars above. If it wasn't for the half charred suit of Barry's in my right hand, I would probably be lost in my own consciousness, but feeling it between my fingers kept me grounded and made me remember why I felt this way.

Cars bustle below in the streets, along with the sound of faint and distant chattering on the sidewalks. It amazed me that after something so critical—something so horrible—that life could still go on as if nothing had happened. Something did happen, and they didn't realize it. They lost their precious flash; their guardian angel.

It was then Barry's face came across my mind, with his scattered freckles and soft tan cheeks. Those eyes that made me feel lost every time I looked into them, and the iconic pearly white smile. Just picturing it again plunged me deeper into my despair, and knowing that I'd never see it again was what really did me in.

I could hear his laugh in my ears. I could hear all of the words he had ever said to me; it made a part of me feel lost, but the other part relished in it. Hearing it again made me feel safe; made me feel just a tad bit better. That was when I remembered the first time I really realized I was falling for him.

It was in the club that night Trajectory came...Barry and I were sitting there at the bar, and he was actually asking me about myself. I couldn't remember the last time someone had asked me about myself, at least, until he did. Then that was when he grabbed my hand...

I didn't know it then, but I cared for him. All of those times I sat there and told myself that what I was feeling was wrong...now I know it was a lie. Caring for Barry wasn't wrong; I knew that now. It just took me too long to realize it, and now he's gone.

That was when it turned off. My emotions flicked off like a switch, and the numbness was gone. I sit up then as I stare blankly at Central City below, eyes cold as stone. In the blink of an eye, I get up and flash down the side of the building and race back to the police station. I knew that Hunter's choice awaited me when I got back, but I didn't care in that moment.

When I arrive at the station, I race into the office area to where Caitlin was still sitting, handcuffed to the file cabinet. I stop directly in front of her as her dark eyes scale me until she makes eye contact, a look of fear on her face. I figured she thought that I was going to kill her or something of the sort, but that wasn't why I was here.

"They killed him," I breathe, the words tasting like poison on my tongue.

Caitlin furrows her eyebrows, desperate confusion on her face. "Killed who?"

I pull out the ripped up flash suit from behind my back. "Your friends killed Barry. I watched him get obliterated...they were trying to give him his speed back. It didn't work."

She shakes her head, doubt on her face. "You're lying-"

"Not this time," I cut her off, shaking my head as I toss the part of his suit at her feet, causing her to reach out and lay her hand on it. The moment she does, her head hangs as a gasp leaves her throat, realizing that I was telling the truth.

"He can't just be gone..." she fades off, sobs leaving her throat. "There's no way-"

"I only left you alive because of him," I state bitterly, remembering the promise I made to him right after Hunter had taken her. Before I can finish my statement, she looks up at me with tears in her eyes, yet a stone cold look in them as well.

Her jaw clenches. "And now that he's gone, you're going to kill me, aren't you? Just do it already, I already know Jay will never let me go-"

"I'm not going to kill you," I shake my head, taking a step back as I let my eyes drift away for a moment. "I told him I'd make sure you were safe...and despite how much I don't like you, I'm going to keep that promise, dead or alive. You still meant something to him."

She's silent for a long moment before she takes a deep breath, her voice shaky. "Then please...please just get me out of here."

"I can't do that," I shake my head. "I might keep my promise, but I won't risk my life for yours, I'll assure you of that."

The air is tense around us for a long time. We were silent, but in my mind, it was as if we were paying some sort of tribute to Barry. I just couldn't grasp the idea that he was truly and really gone. Finally, after a long time of nothing, I speak carefully.

"Barry might be gone, but this is far from over. I won't let Hunter destroy this city...I promise."

I wasn't sure if I could make a promise like that, but after seeing Barry die...it changed something inside of me. It was almost as if the light that was inside of him transferred onto me, and the only thing I could think of was how much he believed in me. He always called me a hero, and I wasn't...but I knew I could be for him. Just this once.

And to do that, I needed to save his city.

-*+*-

woah a lot happened...well, kinda. I guess we're gonna see why Raven and Killer Frost really do hate one another, right? And Raven being a hero for Barry?? my aesthetic.

vote n comment of course!