Hello friend. Hello friend, that... that doesn't feel right. Do you want a different name? That's a slippery slope though, because we have to remember that you're in my head. B*gger, I can't believe I'm about to tell you my story...!

I never really told you much about myself, did I? Well to start with, people saw me as your average geeky nerd. But I'm actually not, because I'm on the autistic spectrum and I suffer from social anxiety. This affects how I function in everyday life, such as socialising and building a connection with people. Sure, some of the kids in school gave me a chance and I gladly took every one. But...they didn't work out, they never did and that's made my anxiety worse over the years.

Well, at least I have my family to help me cope. Initially, they were fixated on winning their screaming matches, but... they're okay now.

On a different note, everyone has media productions, topics and people that they are interested in; favourite movie, television show or cute band, you get the idea. My interests were similar, but they were a lot different than the stereotypical teenager's interests. Since I was 9 years old, I've been a huge fan of Sonic the Hedgehog. I've played the games I was able to get my hands on, I watched some of the television shows and I bought the merchandise that I could. My bedroom's walls are covered in video game posters and my childhood plush toys of the characters helped me calm down whenever I had an anxiety attack because of bullying. I also have a little lapis ring which was a gift on my 13th birthday and that helped soothe my anxiety too...

So, feel free to grab a snack and settle in. Because I'm about to tell you some of the events that occurred, seven years back. I was 14 years old, attending high school in Los Santos and trying my best to be... pretty much the light at the end of the tunnel for my family.

But I had no idea what was around the corner...

...

(Tuesday, September 17, 2013 - De Santa Residence in Rockford Hills, Los Santos, San Andreas, USA...)

"Just cause you got a massive gaper, b*tch,"

"You f*cking homo, you're dead! Dad! He said I have a massive... Jimmy called me a b*tch!"

"He tried to knife attack me! No one creeps on the J-Dog, my n*ggas!"

Oh for god's sake.

This is what I've had to live with, since I was just 5 years old. My family was one hell of a lively bunch, you might say. I'm the youngest of three kids; the other two are Tracey and Jimmy. The former is pretty much my polar opposite, both appearance and personality wise. Her blue eyes are more brighter than my brown ones and her oval face is clear unlike my combination of spots, moles and freckles. The final two contrasts involved her blond hair remaining perfect unlike my messy dark hair and her pink bikinis giving off a more approachable vibe unlike my blue plaid shirts. But despite the major differences between us, I'd say she's the first one who I'm closest to. Then, there's Jimmy. A once friendly blond-haired and blue eyed kid turned into an obese and lazy ginger-haired whiner who did nothing except play Righteous Slaughter 7 and shout very inappropriate insults at his fellow gamers ... but on the plus side, there's still a hint of the good hearted kid still in him.

And finally, there's Michael and Amanda. The latter was the closest I had to a mother, but Michael on the other hand... he's the one I got along with the least sadly. Why? Because whilst he did try to behave kindly during our conversations, he mostly spends his time lounging by the pool, bringing girls home and drinking. Not only that, but he couldn't even look at me and he didn't bother to tell me why whenever I asked him about it!

At the time, it really hurt and I thought I must have done something wrong for him not to acknowledge me. Anyhow...

I was in the middle of getting ready for the day ahead when Tracey was ratting Jimmy out for insulting her. My bedroom's walls were painted in a light-blue color and draped in posters from my favourite video-game franchises, accompanied by numerous pictures from my life. I also had an acoustic guitar, a small white bookshelf and a set of drawers sitting on the left side of my room, accompanied by a black television set and Playstation 3 console. Dark-blue fabric coated the floor whilst a ray of lights streaming up from my bed and accompanying my Polaroid photo collection on a rack pinned on the wall ahead of it, somehow making the entire room appear as an inviting location.

Once I climbed out of bed, I decided to tie my hair back in a ponytail with bangs framing my face. I then stripped out of my grey Sonic t-shirt and colored bottoms into an outfit which consisted of a grey camo shirt, an orange plaid shirt, blue jeans tightened by a black belt and a pair of black-grey boots. After slipping on a lapis ring on my right ring finger, I took my iPhone and Sonic headphones from the set of drawers, placing them inside my brown rucksack which had a adorable classic Sonic key ring attached. Upon zipping it up, I grabbed it by one of the straps and exited my bedroom for the mansion's first floor, mentally preparing myself for a possible tyraid of screaming.

I felt a mixture of emotions about today, mainly excitement and anxiety for a number of reasons. Firstly, by the tug of an analog stick, I went from a tiny 25-week old premature baby to an 14 year-old introverted nerd. My family must be experiencing the whirlwind of emotions I am, given what went down at the time.

You're probably wondering why I'm feeling nervous as well. Well to put it simply, I unfortunately had to spend my birthday at high school, which is pretty much the best setting for teenage drama. Ugh... People would often think of me as anti-social because of my autism, but the truth was that I was shy. Painfully shy. I told myself many times to be more outgoing and I would try to approach a stranger and strike up a pleasant conversation. But due to the mistreatment I endured throughout my life, it wouldn't work as I was often teased for being "weird" and "uncool".

One day it will though, I'm sure of it.

As I turned a left and ventured straight for the kitchen, I couldn't help but notice Amanda, who was dressed in her purple and white jacket and skirt, enter the house with a man simply clad in white overalls. I see Amanda's still at it with playing tennis. Nice.

"Thank you, coach!"

"You're welcome as always," Kyle replied cheerfully, embracing her in an almost... loving manner? Oh god. "Same time, tonight?"

"Of course, I look forward to it," My surrogate mom answered happily, both of them completely oblivious to me standing behind them.

"I'll look forward to it more," The tennis coach told her, before turning to leave and walking past me. "Morning, Ryan!"

"Morning?" I greeted back politely, feeling dumbstruck. What the hell was that?!

As soon as he left, I turned back round and raised an eyebrow. "Wow, I see you two are getting along nicely,"

When you shouldn't be, because you're still bl**dy married - even though this could be a perfect opportunity to finalise a divorce and for us to bail from Michael.

"It's not what you think, Ryan," My surrogate mom told me calmly. Tch, really? "And unlike Michael, he actually listens to me and he respects me, okay?"

"Okay, I wasn't trying to start a fight, don't worry," I reassured her, smiling. "I was just making an observation,"

"I know, sweetheart," Amanda replied, happily following up with "Anyway, Happy 14th Birthday!"

"Thank you!" I giggled, peeling my backpack off and placing it by the kitchen's entrance before walking in to make lunch. Tracey's gonna glomp me any minute now, I know it. "I... I take it Tracey and Michael are out?"

"Tracey's just outside by the pool and who knows where the hell Michael is," My surrogate mom answered. "Is there anything you'd like to do later to celebrate?"

"I thought you were planning to have a tennis lesson?" I questioned with confusion as I didn't want to interfere with plans. Old habit, don't ask.

"I can always reschedule," Amanda reassured me, smiling.

"O-Okay," I briefly stammered with surprise. These pleasant moments were quite rare, so I always got caught off guard whenever they happened. "I... What do you think about us having a girl's night out with Tracey?"

"That sounds lovely," Mom commented happily. Her smile then faded into a concerned look as she continued addressing me. "How are you feeling about today though, considering you're going to be at school?"

"I'm..." I began, finding myself trailing off for two seconds as I struggled to calm my nerves. "I'm nervous because there's the students I had to deal with every day. I know we've talked to the tutors before and that they've told them to stop harassing me, but ... they just wouldn't!"

Mom's worried look quickly changed into a reassuring one. "I wouldn't worry too much. You've been doing amazing so far and if you get targeted again, forget about them. You just focus on getting through your studies and you'll be home before you know it," My mother's smile then morphed back into concern. "Talk to someone if you start to... feel that urge again too, okay?"

Yeaah, about that. Because of the constant screaming that occurred in our family unit and Michael barely acknowledging me for an unknown reason, ... I've developed a case of self-loathing which... I took out on myself... My mother and sister were the only ones who knew my reason for doing it and since then, they both tried to make home life a tad better, which I really appreciated.

To be honest, I felt like I was about to go over the brink because of the problems we had. What the hell caused everything to go downhill too?!

"Yeah, I'll keep that in mind," I affirmed, forcing a brave grin on my face.

Before Amanda could respond, the doors to the outside pool opened and before I knew it, my older sister excitedly glomped me from behind and exclaimed "Happy Birthday, Rhino!"

"Thank you!" I laughed after letting out a slight squeal, ignoring the pain that angrily throbbed upon impact and eagerly returning her hug. "How are you doing?"

"I'm a lot better now after our *sshole of a brother insulted me,"

"W-What happened, Tracey?" Mom asked with concern.

"Oh, nothing much," My sister scoffed sarcastically. "Jimmy just simply gave me the finger and told me that I had a massive gaper,"

"Right," Amanda took charge, feeling just as disgusted as I did. "I'm gonna have a word with him after you both go and we need to make it clear to the boys that they've got problems to sort out,"

What about us?

"How are we going to do that easily?" I questioned worriedly. "Considering what the pair of them are like?"

Hearing this, my mother and sister both shared a concerned look and that was all I needed. They don't know, yet. Okay. Afterwards, the conversation thankfully became more positive and breakfast and lunch was sorted, off Tracey and I went.

Okay, shortly I'll be thrown into the hell that is high school. Here's hoping that today will be great...