ｔａｅｈｙｕｎｇ

What would you do if an angel told you to jump off the edge of cliff?

Would you listen, and fall without question?

That's what I did. I jumped on my own will and now I'm falling into something that I don't even know. Is this what it feels like to be free? To make my own choices?

To be with Jessica?

My hands wrap around her tiny waist, pulling her petite frame closer to mine. She makes a soft noise that almost sounds like a mewl, and her once hesitant hands move up to my shoulders and interweave themselves behind my neck, closing every inch of space between us. My head is spinning out of it's axis and it almost feels like I'm flying.

Oh, how I've dreamt of her soft pink lips on mine, but none of those fantasies even come close to reality. She tastes like fruit, and I find myself delving to taste more of her, biting her lip and making her gasp softly so I can explore her with my tongue. I've never kissed like this before; I'm not desperately grabbing her boob or trying to tongue fuck her. No, I'm just going with the flow, letting her take me as far as she wants, wherever she wants.

It's a soft, natural type of kiss. And unlike the others, I don't know what it means.

(A part of me wonders what Jessica is thinking; why she's doing this; and what this means for our relationship.)

Jessica's hands grip my hair, tugging softly. Fuck. For a girl as pure as her, she sure knows how to make a guy hard.

"Taehyung." She half moans, half purrs. And I'm about to groan her name back in response when everything stops.

She harshly pulls and backs away, almost stumbling. And I'm no longer falling, instead I'm crashing into the cold hard ground and that's when everything clicks back into place for me.

What just happened?

What the fuck did I just do?!

"Oh my fucking god," I can still feel her lips on mine and it makes my stomach turn. "I just kissed my best friend's girlfriend."

I hear her voice; it sounds like she wants to cry. "And I just kissed my boyfriend's best friend."

The high's over, and we both are crashing into reality full force.

"Oh myㅡI'm such a horrible ㅡperson." Jessica's crying now. I can hear the sobs in between her words and it's breaking my heart.

But I don't look at her. I can't.

"Jungkook's ㅡhe's gonna hate me ㅡwhat have I done?" She sobs.

When I hear her say his name, everything halts.

Jungkook...he'll hate me too.

No no no. That can't happen.

I won't allow it to happen.

"Jungkook doesn't need to know." This is wrong. I know it. But I just can't lose my best friend.

I chose a girl over my best friend and the reality of it is beginning to sink in. I threw away years of friendship for a kiss and although I don't regret it, it doesn't stop the pile of guilt from settling in my gut.

"What? But heㅡ"

I finally look at her. Her eyes are puffed and her lips swollen, both for different reasons. She's just as scared as I am.

Good, that means I can convince her.

Grabbing her chin, I force her frantic eyes to meet mine. "Listen to me. What happened in this rooftop stays between us. No one else needs to know, you hear me?"

This is so wrong.

But there's no better option.

Jessica looks torn. She contemplates it, maybe thinking of what Jungkook would do if he actually found out.

"You like Jungkook, right?" I continue to persuade her. "You want continue to be with him. If you tell him what happened today, your relationship with him will be over. Take my word for it.

"If you want to be with him. Then you'll keep this a secret between us. Only us. Can you do that?"

It works. She nods slowly.

"Promise me." I need to hear her speak. I need to hear resolve in her voice. I need to know she won't say peep about what happened.

She doesn't miss a beat this time. "I promise."

Jungkook still doesn't know to this day. Even when I was punching him in the face for kissing Lola at that party, he didn't know that Jessica had done the exact same thing to him.

He didn't know I was the beginning of all their relationship issues.

I'm thrown back to reality when Lola shoves her tongue back in my throat again. This time I'm not falling off a cliff or soaring through the sky. Rather I'm on fire. The heat of lust envelops me and passion flows through. I'm not in a haze; I know exactly what I'm doing.

I'm kissing my best friend's ex girlfriend.

But really, does it even matter?

I just want to enjoy her touch, without bothering about what someone like Jimin would say if he caught usㅡ

"Taehyung? Dude, what the actual fuck?"

You've got to be fucking kidding me.

I pull away from Lola, slightly irritates that Jimin just had to be the one to interrupt us. I'd honestly prefer Jungkook over him, and that's saying a lot.

Jimin is staring at Lola with a pissed off glint in his eyes, arms crossed like he's ready to fight. Behind himㅡoh fuck...Jessica looks like a deer frozen in the headlights. She's clutching to her books tightly, like it's holding her rather than the other way round.

My irritation disappears when I see how stricken she looks.

I'm up immediately when her eyes begin to glass over, staggering a bit due to my sudden movements.

Behind me, I can hear shouting. But I don't care.

"Jessieㅡ" I start, but I'm caught off.

"You lied to me?"

I don't understand. I lied to who?

"Huh?"

Worst thing to ever say when a girl is angry at you, believe me.

"I asked you if there was anything going on between you and her." she refers to Lola like she's venom, and the very utterance of her name could have her poisoned. "You said no! You told me you only liked me! Why did you lie to me? And why the heck does it have to be her?!"

I remember. I had called her after the party, and immediately I picked up I could feel the jealousy oozing out of the phone. She asked me if I enjoyed the kiss; if I like Lola; if there is anything going on between me and her nemesis.

I replied no to every question.

"I don'tㅡit's only you, it always has been."

I may have lied to some questions on the phone, and I may have something confusing towards Lola (not feelings, but something ), but that doesn't change a thing. I'm still in love with Jessica no matter how much it hurts me.

Jessica's wipes her eyes with the back of her hand, and I want nothing more than to kiss her right there and then to soothe her tears. But I can't, because she's with Jungkook, and I just kissed Lola.

But right now, it really doesn't feel that way.

"Then why did I catch you kissing her in the middle of the street?"

"I'm sorry, I didn't..." I start automatically, but then something registers.

What does she mean by catch me?

Just as I'm about to ask, I feel a presence next to me. One that grips my arm with her manicured nails and sneers.

"Catch him? Hei, nawa oo [This is serious]." Lola's standing next to me now; whatever her and Jimin were fighting about is over as I see him move next to Jessica, looking more pissed than before. "I knew you had some sort of possessive grip on him, but this your entitlement is just too much. Na your boyfriend be dis? [Is he your boyfriend?]"

Possessive grip? Entitlement?

"Lola, don'tㅡ" I'm caught off by Jimin.

"Don't fucking talk to Jessie that way." He holds Jessica and defends her. "She's just shocked that Taehyung would go for someone like you."

Someone like Lola? What does he mean by that? Someone harsh and opinionated? Someone fierce? Someone who doesn't pretend to be nice?

"Someone like me? What's that supposed to mean, bitch?" This doesn't feel like a fight between me and Jessica anymore. It feels like everyone's ganged up on Lola, and I'm left on the fence, watching.

Jimin is about to say something incredibly offensive (because he has the I'm-about-to-say-something-offensive face right now) but Jessica swoops in. "I don't feel entitled over Taehyung, okay? I just worry about my friend."

Lola snorts. "Please. We all know that if Taehyung got a girlfriend you'd get super jealous even though you have your own boyfriend. As a matter of fact, how would you feel if I asked Taehyung out and we started dating?"

I can see the uncertain look behind her scowl, even though her words aren't ."You don't deserve someone like him, okay? You're too..."

Lola makes a sound. "Mchtewww."

Once again, I'm baffled by people's opinion of Lola. "Too what, Jessica?" I ask, genuinely confused. "What's wrong with Lola?"

Jimin rolls his eyes. "Everything's wrong with her, and if you don't stop kissing her ass then you're gonna end up hurt and depressed, just like Jungkook was."

The nails that were once digging into my skin are now slipping away, out of reach.

It seems all irritation is gone, because when I look at Lola all I see is tiredness.

"Whatever, bitch. I don't care what you think of me and I don't care if you don't like the fact that I talk to and occassionally kiss Taehyung. Build a bridge and get over yourselves. Bye."

She rolls her eyes, waves her hand in the air then begins to walk away, her heels clanking against the pavement. I watch her go, and a small part of me strangely wishes she would stay.

"Ugh I hate her." Jimin rolls his eyes. "Come on, Jessie. I promised Jungkook I'd get you home safely." He pulls her arm and tugs her away. As he leaves, he yells, "We'll talk later Taehyung! Be online!"

Ugh, I'm gonna get chewed out by Jimin.

Jessica looks back as well. I can't define the look on her face, but it makes me want to pull her close and kiss her forever.

I groan when instead of seeing Jessica in my brain, Lola's brown eyes and lips are what's there instead.

Two girls. One who I feel something for, and wants me back as well. The other I'm in love with, but I don't understand her own feelings towards me.

If I had any common sense, I would choose neither and just focus on something else rather than relationship drama. But I'm not smart. So my feet lead me in the same direction Lola was going, until I catch up with her and grab her hand.

She looks down at my hand gripping hers, then looks up at me, raising a brow. Confusion lies behind that facade of confidence, but there's something else. Smugness? Satisfaction?

Victory?

I don't bother to discern it.

"Let me walk you home."

She cocks her head to the side, a smirk playing on her lips. "Alright then, Taeboy."

My heart asks what and my brain asks why, but something else in me says yes.

: :

Author's note

Yeesh this chapter sucks ass.

Mtchewww is a sound that Nigerians (mostly women) make when annoyed, or when judging someone else's actions.

Usually accompanied by us eyeing said person up and down.