ｄａｍｉｌｏｌａ

　　“When are you coming back mummy?” I run a comb through my kinky hair as I ask.

“Ah hah, see this girl. When de burial has finished I will come.”

I sigh in frustration. I know how long burials in Nigeria take, and I know my mom will probably stay a couple of weeks more to make sure everything with her family in Ebele is okay. Their my family too, technically, but the reality is I've never met them. So I don't really care about them.

“Have you eaten?”

I smile, “Yes mummy.”

“What did you make? I hope you did not burn my kitchen down, dis child.”

“Your kitchen is fine oo[oh]. Mrs. Anderson was with me.”

“She dey come check up on you baah? [Has she been coming to check up on you?]”

“Yes mummy,” I answer her regular stream of questions until she gets tired of hearing me constantly say "Yes mummy". There's silence on the line for a moment, then she asks:

“How is that ehm, Johncook boy?”

There's a strain in my voice as I answer. “He's fine mummy.”

She never knew we dated, if she did she'd book a plane ticket to Nigeria and drive me back to my village to receive a wonderful beating from my grandmother. All she was aware of was the happiness that lit up in my eyes whenever I spoke of Jungkook.

I don't want her to know that happiness is gone. She doesn't need to worry.

The concealer covers the bags under my eyes pretty well. Sleep has been coming rare for me lately; I spend my lonely nights with nothing but my self destructive thoughts. But no one will ever know that, because of the wonderful gift God has given : makeup.

Lipstick to hide the cracks. Eyeliner to distract from the dead eyes. Highlighter to shine on the darkness. It's funny, because makeup wasn't made for us to conceal, it was made to reveal. To amplify the beauty that was already on the outside.

It used to be like that for me. But now, all I use it to do is hide the pain.

• •

Parties are an escape for me. I lose who I am in a sea of unknown bodies, forget my woes as each beats thumps my heart, and become nothing but a wild young teen in the midst of many others.

Taehyung's parties never disappoint. Everyone is either drunk, hyped or high. I'm in the hyped category. Drinking has never been my forte.

My body gyrates to the beat, and once every minute I pause to take in my surroundings. I came to this party for a reason, although I really want to stay and show everyone how I can move to "Wild Thoughts". I keep my body moving as I pull out my phone from my bra (classy, ay?) and send Taehyung a text.

Lola : where u at bitch

Taehyung : in the vip room aka my bedroom

Lola : can i join?

Taehyung : i don't think you'll like the people here.

Lola : u mean Jessica?

Taehyung : ye, her mostly.

Taehyung : u can come if u like tho

Taehyung : we're playing truth or dare

The black of my phone's screen reflects the scheming smile on my face. Putting the phone back in it's safe place I make my way upstairs, pushing through some sweaty bodies and swatting away grabby hands.

I check three rooms until I find the right place. A small group of people form a circle on the ground, with some sitting on the couches available. Taehyung has a really big room, with a flat screen TV and everything. This ain't a bad place to sleepover.

You know, if these rats don't come around often.

Everyone looks like they just walked out of a teen high school movie from the 2000's. Jessica is the main character; oblivious, prudish, kind, naïve, and oh-so blonde. Jungkook is the love interest; hopelessly in love, male, dominant, romantic and stupid. Taehyung is the second choice; hopeless, pitiful, sad, lonely, hot.

There's also the quirky girl, the stupid frat boy, the gay best friend, and an Asian boy. The stereotype is so painfully obvious.

Then there's me; the ex girlfriend/slut. Mean, vengeful, crazy, whorish and obsessed.

“Come in Lola!” Taehyung beckons me. From the corner of my eye, I can see Jessica and Jungkook staring at me as I sit on the edge of the couch. I notice the Asian blonde – what's his name, Jimin? – stiffen beside me.

“Is there anyone else you invited, Taehyung?” Jungkook strains his voice in purpose, trying to send a signal that he's uncomfortable with me being here. I huff annoyed. If you have a problem with me, what stops you from saying it upfront? 

“Nah, everyone's here.” Taehyung replies, ignoring his tone. “Let's begin. Samantha, spin the bottle.”

Samantha; a quirky best friend, with rainbow coloured hair and clothing that looks like it came straight out of a 2008 Disney show. The smile never leaves her face as she spins the bottle, eyes lighting up when it lands on Jessica.

Jimin is on the other end of the bottle, so he asks, “Truth or dare?”

Jessica, a typical wallflower replies, “Truth.”

I scoff.

Taehyung gives me a hard look.

“Is it true you're a virgin?”

I snort. What sort of After shit is this?

Jessica blushes, twirling the ends of her flat blonde hair around her fingers. I feel a bit self conscious as I subtly pat my own kinky dark hair. Everyone around me has flowing, silky straight hair and light skin. It makes me feel out of place, and for a moment I wish I had followed my mother to Ebele, where everyone had skin and hair like mine, and understood my Pidgin.

I feel disconnected sometimes.

The wallflower takes her sweet time, opening and closing her mouth, getting redder by the second. I roll my eyes, “Okay, mystery solved. You're a virgin. Spin the damn bottle again.”

The person sitting next to the rainbow girl snickers. Jungkook glares at me and I act like his coldness doesn't affect me.

“Lola~” I don't even realise the bottle is pointed at me until I see the snickering guy grinning nefariously. “Truth or dare?”

“Dare.” Mama didn't raise no pussy.

His grin grows wider while rainbow girl goes “oooh”. I give her a look and she shuts up.

“I dare you to full on make out with Taehyung. With tongue.”

Taehyung's hot and my breath doesn't smell like ass, so I don't really see a problem with it. I make my way to Taeboy, grab a fistful of his shirt and crash his lips against mine.

I hear wolf whistles around me, but all of that begins to fade once Taehyung and I really get into the kiss. His arm snakes around my back and pulls me flush against his chest as his tongue explores the corners of my mouth. He tastes like alcohol and mint mixed with his natural taste, and well, it's kind of addictive.

If I'm not so in love with Jungkook, maybe I'd try Taehyung on for size.

We stop when we hear the door slam shut. Jessica ran out of the room, with Samantha and another guy following close behind.

“Jessica!” Jimin yells out the door, but doesn't bother catching up with her.

I try to hide my smirk.

Jungkook is about running after her too, when I grab his arm, stopping him. “She needs time, Kook. All of this is probably overwhelming for her.”

It's a lie. I know Jessica ran out because she doesn't like her second choice being touched. She doesn't know it, but she's possessive of Taehyung, and she wants him to be there every time Jungkook is not. And she doesn't like me, the girl who dated her boyfriend.

I really hate her.

Taehyung says nothing, he just stares at me with a look I've never seen on him before.

Like he wants to devour me.

Lust can cloud someone's love, and it usually happens in men more than women. So me, a sexy and exotic vixen seducing a hormone driven teenage boy, will be a piece of cake.

And once I get Taehyung, I can get Jungkook.