It took me long to update this story... Didn't have time and beside I lost my money this morning and had to look for it so I was busy on my free day today too :D This chapter is veryyyy long so I made two parts of it ;)

The song is Forgetting you by Davichi (Moon Lovers: Scarlet Heart Ryeo OST)

Enjoy this chapter :)

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D-Day was finally here, the groom Bright was going to marry his bride Kanita. The spacious wedding was decorated beautifully with red and white roses, the tables were covered with red tablecloth, the chairs dressed with white blanket. The wedding hall was filled with more than hundreds persons, families, friends and other acquaintances. Kongpob and Arthit were on the groom's side, they shared with Knott, Prem, Wad and Toota a special table that was reserved for the groom's best friends. Sun refused to be held by his father but wanted only his mother to carry him. The wedding ceremony began, the bride, wearing a white beautiful long dress had already walked down the aisle with her father. She, now, was standing with her groom on the altar, the older man leading the marriage spoke few vows that bride and groom repeated. They then exchanged the rings. They were finally declared husband and wife, Bright kissed his Kanita at the end, the ceremony was celebrated with applauses while husband and wife were kissing passionately. Sounds of cameras taking pictures of the happy couple followed.

The moment Bright and Kanita shared a sweet kiss, Arthit was left emotional, almost letting his tears falling down but he hold them back to not destroy the good mood. Somehow he felt absent, as if he was somewhere else daydreaming, thinking about the past and how his future would had been if it wasn't for their painful past. He imagined himself standing there on the altar with Kongpob in front of him, surrounded by their families and close friends to celebrate their wedding. How great if would had been if they were standing there instead of Bright and Kanita! If Kongpob and he didn't break up years ago, he would be the first one to be married among his clique. If he didn't meet such unfortunate circumstances years ago then they would stil be together. Dalika, P'Net and Lek took everything away from him that he always dreamt about with Kongpob. They took his happiness away. Look at where they were standing now! Kongpob broke up with him, he was fighting for his recovery and their son Sun was confused about their relationship. Although he was the first one to have a relationship in his clique, he ended up being alone later. Knott found a girlfriend, she was sitting next to him around the table. Toota was there with his longterm boyfriend. Prem and Wad were engaged and would marry soon. Only he wasn't fortunate enough to find happiness with the love of his life. It was indeed sad but he didn't want to fell in selfpity. It would make the whole situation and his life pathetic!

There were two important questions swirling in his mind for now: How should he live without Kongpob and Sun? How should he teach their son that his father and him were going seperate ways now? It would leave the child traumatized, right? Sun was the only person in the world he didn't want to hurt but it looked like he was going to make him cry with their break up.

Kongpob realized his ex boyfriend fighting with his tears, he took many glances from him to make sure that he was fine. He had the huge urge to touch him and caress his shoulder to give him assurance that he was there for him but he remembered that he broke up with Arthit some days ago. He retired his hand, keeping it to himself. Sun noticed his mommy sniffing back his tears so he touched his face and rubbed his small palm against the latter's cheek to sooth him. Arthit was surprised to see his son caring for him and comforting him so he gave him a smile. His friends wanted to tease Arthit since it was rare occasion to see their hot tempered head hazer being emotional but they couldn't mutter a word. They remained quiet since they were deeply moved too. Each one of them remembered how they met Bright, learned to love and also hate him at the same time for his carefree personality. They were happy for him but also sad that they were losing a friend that wouldn't have much time for them from now on. Step by step, they were accustomated to the fact that they were losing the most humorous one in their group. Toota, the soft one of them was crying a river, felt happy for his best friend he always joked and fought with that he had another important person in his life now. However, a joke from him got rid of the sad atmosphere in the air that was caused by losing a friend.

„He's finally maturing...", Toota said while wipping his tears with a handkerchief.

The whole gang laughed at his joke, they were sure that the joker of their gang would never grow up even if he married now. They speculated that he could change if he and his wife are awaiting a child. Now it was time for the bride and groom to sit on their place in front of their guests, Toota was choosed to have a speech about Bright's life on the university. Toota gave a long speech that was too embarrassing for the groom himself. He knew that his friend would dare to humiliate him in front of everyone so he braved himself to see the most embarrassing time of his life. He was the mischievous hazer who liked to flirt with every girl, hated to study and used to copy his friends' homeworks to get better grades. There was a compilation video of their university lives and the time they were hazers. Even the pictures of Kongpob messing with Arthit was showed while Bright would smirk at them, giggling and pointing his finger at them for being lovey-dovey. Arthit laughed with everyone, he missed those time when they were studying without having any worries for the future. He missed the time he was carefree with Kong. Ah, he wished he could go back to those times when they didn't encounter those despicable persons who took their happiness away. But if he did go back to the past then he wouldn't have Sun.

Arthit came unexpecdly close to Kongpob, his shoulder brushing against the latter's. All the sudden he sensed a soothing warmth shooting through his arm through his whole body. It left him tremble for a brief moment. Unbelievable how Kongpob could make his body respond to his lovely touch. Even though they went seperate way, his body would always remember the man he spent most time with. He gave Sun back to his father then left the hall without telling him the reason why he had to go outside. He used the time his friends were busy laughing at the videos and pictures Toota compiled together to slip through their observation. As he came outside, he went far away from the hall where he could be alone. His eyes were swollen red.

„Are you okay?", a voice came from behind, asking him about his wellbeing.

He recognized the voice but he didn't reply to it yet. Apparantly he even cringed to hear the manly voice behind him. Since he was angry at the owner of this warm voice, he didn't want to reply to him yet. No, I'm not alright at all... Everything is your fault, Kongpob! You broke up with me at the time I needed you the most. Arthit turned back to face Kong, still fighting against his tears that filled his eyes. His rage couldn't be hold back anymore. He remembered the many days he came to Kong to ask for his forgiveness. He begged him to give him another chance to prove him that he still trusted him. However, his ex fan brushed him off by telling him that none of them was his P'Arthit's fault but he felt guilty for making his Phee's life miserable. 

Of course, Kongpob was worried and not confident anymore when knowing that Arthit returned to him but didn't trust him tob e faithful to him 3 years ago. It hurted to know that his Phee didn't trust him but the true problem was himself. Because he couldn't forgive himself for making P'Arthit lose his trust in him and also fell so ill that he almost died, he couldn't allow himself in his life again. He was afraid that those misfortunes would repeat if he approached him again. Kongpob thought of himself as a jinx that wasn't meant to be with P'Arthit. After explaining him about his insecurity, Arthit still didn't give up but came back the next day to try to speak some senses to him. But the older man's effort to make Kongpob believe in their love, was just in vain. His N'Kongpob refused to give him another chance. He gave up as his Nong came to visit his parents to ask for their forgiveness. He explained them the reason why he couldn't be with their son and even apologized for putting him through so much tortures. It knocked senses into Arthit that Kong was determined to let him go. Forever!

Kongpob approached his Phee, reaching out his hand to him to wip the tears away from his cheeks. He felt a sharp sting in his chest, his heart thumped harder to see his beloved Phee on the egde of losing his calmness. It was painful to see the fierce Arthit so emotional. Somehow he couldn't get rid of the feeling that he was crying because of him. He couldn't brush off the urge to caress him and take his pain away. Arthit was the love of his life after all. Arthit was and would be the only one he would always love, the only one who would make his heart beat restlessly like that. But why was he hesitating to touch him and begin a new relationship with him to built a happy family? Was it simple because of his guilt? Or was it something else too? He knew that he was just not confident enough to give his Phee a bright future. He was afraid that P'Arthit wouldn't love him anymore. Where did all his confident of the past go? Where did the brave Kongpob Arthit learned to love endlessly disappear?

„What do you intend to do if I tell you that I'm not alright at all?", Arthit's question brought Kongpob to cease with his intention to touch him.

Kongpob froze on the spot, the hand shortly before Arthits cheek. He retired his hand, playing with his fingers on his leg since he didn't know what to do with his restless hand. He just put it back in his pocket to hid his trembling hand from his P'Arthit. Arthit sighed then shook his head and turned his back to him.

„You're just unbelievable, Kongpob...", he turned back to him and gave him a serious. He pushed him back, „I love you but you don't love me anymore. This is the conclusion I came to after chasing after you for a whole week. Why the need to torture myself when I know that the man I want doesn't want me...", he said with a soft but quavering voice. His expression was cold as never before. He went pass him to take the direction back to the wedding hall, his shoulder shoving the younger man's aside. It was a rough push but he didn't care as long as he was still mad at him. According to himself, Kong should be aware of his rage toward him. He didn't want to chase after someone who wasn't sure of himself neither of his love for him. For him, Kongpob was indecisive, indulging in his guilt instead of choosing the right path that would benefit everyone. Kongpob was running away just like he did years ago, something that he was still regretting. Something he would regret for the rest of his life!

The taller man was left alone in the darkness, surrounded by loneliness. He couldn't move his feet to run after him. P'Arthit mentioned that he came to the conlusion that he didn't love him anymore but it was a big lie. He loved him so much, even more than before. Where did he get the idea that his love for him was gone? Kongpob's hands were twitching, he couldn't ignore the overwhelming urge that forced him to run after him and confess to him that he loved him more than he would ever think. However, his feet refused to move. His heart wanted his Phee but his brain was against his heart that was only throbbing for the older man. It was intriguing, he didn't know how to fight the insecurity away.

Instead of trying to talk to him and end their misunderstanding for all the time, Kong returned in the wedding hall and did the unforgivable mistake that let P'Arthit misunderstand him even more. Honestly, he was angry at his Phee for doubting his love for him but he did one mistake after the other. Like many said, a single mistake would lead to another one. He apologized to his seniors and friends that he had to leave the ceremony earlier than expected. The reason he had to leave early was because of Sun. It was already 6 p.m and he had to take the small child for bed. Actually he could stay here for another hour. Sun would prefer to stay awake for an hour since it was weekend but his father had already decided for him. The little kid protested that he wanted to stay with mommy and his uncles but Kongpob just took him in his arms and left after bidding farewell with them. Arthit just let him go, causing his friends to look at him and wondering why he didn't take Sun back. Actually, he was very protective of Sun and always fought with Kongpob if he treated their son bad but he didn't protest this time. He had to let them go or else it would be hard for him to let them go in the future. It was too painful to gulp down the heavy lump in his throat and accept the heavy feeling wheighing him down but he had to seperate from them.

Knott, P'Seung Il, Prem and Wad couldn't believe their eyes that let them see the cold head hazer returning. Ever since he returned and learned to love Sun, he turned soft that they were wondering what happened to his bad temper. Now he was slowly turning into the bastard that didn't want to feel anything again. They knew that he was mad at Kong but he was too cold toward Sun who had stretched his arms out to him to be taken in his mommy's arm. He didn't even glance at him to assure him that everything was fine. Unbelievable that Arthit let the boy crying like that! Arthit was aware of the deadly but also worried glares his friends were giving him but he ignored them all. If he turned into the icy senior again then he would move on and accept his fate that Kongpob and him weren't meant for each other.

Toota's speech finally ended, there were loud applauses that was meant for Toota's amazing skills for entertaining the crowd. Arthit clapped too although he didn't feel like smiling at all. He faked his happiness and forced himself to smile but his heart throbbed. His whole body ached due to the pain in his heart he couldn't alleviate at all. 

****

Arthit, his friends, the bride and groom were on the beachside that wasn't far away from the wedding hall. While the rest of the guests were in the hall celebrating Kanita's and Bright's marriage, the newly married couple were drinking outside with his friends. Arthit had alcohol in his glass but he didn't drink heavily like the others were doing beside him. He would take small sips from it from time to time, enjoying the view of the calm sea in front of them, there were some small waves forming in the water that reflected the full moon that shined above them. Some empty bottles were around them in the sand, there were many more bottles filled with strong alcoholic drinks around them. The clique, expect Arthit, was already intoxicated after drinking for an hour now. Bright took a bottle that was already open, crawling over his friends to force his way to Arthit, his action brought his friends to growl at him and scold him for being naughy just like before. He shrugged off their insults and wanted to pour drink in Arthit's glass, only now did he realize that the latter was still at the first glass.

„Why didn't you drink anything at all?", the groom asked, he hiccuped. His cheeks were red from too many alcohol circulating in his blood system.

A faint smile appeared on Arthit's face, somehow the smile reflected his sadness, his eyes even shining the pain he wanted to hide from them the whole time. He didn't answer him yet since he was hesitating telling him the truth but Bright assumed that something was wrong with him since he was quiet the whole time now. Brtight was busy looking at the screen during Toota's speech that he missed the little fight between Kongpob and Arthit earlier. If he was there then, he would scream at them that they shouldn't ruin the good mood with their lover's quarrel. He used his wedding to force Arthit to come back to Thailand because he wanted him to meet his old flame and give their love a chance. If he found out that his plan failed, he would be angry at his friend and his Nong. Bright imagined his own reply, asking his friend Arthit if he was sad because of Kongpob. Bright was always sharp to notice things relating to relashionship but this time he was half right and half wrong.

„I can't drink much, Bright... I don't want to be in hospital again...", Arthit explained but it was half a lie too. Actually he had another reason beside this lame excuse. Sure, the doctors prohibited from drinking heavy alcohols again due to his kidney condition but he couldn't tell him the whole truth or he would ruin the good mood.

Knott and P'Seung Il knew the reason why he had to be sober this night but they didn't let out a single word about that matter, more like about his decision. Arthit should explain it himself to them but if he didn't want them to find it out yet.

Bright mumbled a sad and faint „Oh" as he reminisced that Arthit lost one kidney before and almost died because of his other kidney that had some healthy issue. He retreated back to his wife, leaning his head on her lap while playing the sleepy man. He wasn't sleeping but didn't want them to see him sad about Arthit's detoriated health. Actually, he hated the fact that he couldn't celebrate with them just like the time when they were always drinking in a club when they visited the university years ago.

Arthit looked up in the starry sky. I'm going to leave for good... I'll finally let go of Kongpob and Sun and take the flight tomorrow night to return to South Korea... Bright, I won't come back... This should be his honest answers to Bright's question but he couldn't tell them about it now. They would try everything to stop him so he had to leave secretely and only call them when he was in South Korea. It was the best solution for everyone. The best solution for his heart to calm down.

Flashback

Arthit called his parents to have an important conversation with them yesterday evening. Mrs. and Mr. Rojnapat were siting on the bigger sofa while their son took place on the smaller seat in front of them. Meanwhile P'Seung Il who was also close to the family that he was called their oldest son, was in his room, not having the slightest intention to come out and disturb the family meeting. He already knew the reason why Arthit had called for them to have a talk. He just hoped that his parents wouldn't feel broken hearted if they heard about his decision.

Arthit wasn't sure how to start the conversation so he rubbed against his chin to find the right way how to convince them with his decision. „I know that I'm being unfair to you but I have decided to leave for South Korea...", he realized the shock written over his parents' face but he added, „And this time, I won't come back...", the shocking news escaped his mouth after he braved himself to let those words go instead of keeping it to themselves. It was better to let them know about his departure instead of surprising them with it after he had already left. He didn't plan on making the same cowardly mistake he did 3 years ago as he ran away without advertising them first.

His mother's hands were trembling, her lips moving to say something but the words wouldn't come out. She was in shock that she couldn't contain herself anymore. Her husband hold onto her hands to calm her down. Both of them looked at each other, sighing to assimilate the news first. It was still shocking for them that heir only child was about to leave them again so they had to be sure that he wouldn't regret the choice he made himself.

„Is this your final decision after coming back and living here for few weeks?", his father had to ask him his question. His son didn't tell them about it neither admit their assumption but he already guessed that his son was seriously letting go of Kongpob. Since he didn't see Sun here anymore, he came to the conclusion that they couldn't resolve the problem. Besides, he could tell from Arthit's silence and sad mood that they wouldn't give a third chance to their sweet relationship this time. It was painful to see his child the past few days sad and empty as if his life source left him but he didn't ask him why they fought since it wasn't his place to meddle in and didn't want to remind him of something unpleasant.

The young man sitting in front of them nodded to confirm that he wouldn't regret his decision to. He intertwined his fingers, feeling a sharp sting in his heart after telling his father that he would leave them for good. He had his friends and parents here but what would be the use if he didn't have the only one he hold deep in his heart. Inside of him, he felt lonely, not wanted and not considered important enough. He didn't have any lingered attachement here anymore ever since Kong broke up with him. The taller man wouldn't even give him another chance so he rather leave and never come back instead of staying here and breaking down whenever he saw him. It would be too painful to see him moving on and finding another important person in his life. A person that wasn't him!

„I have you and my friends here but I still need to find my way... Even if I leave, I'll phone you whenever the time seemed right... I promise that I'll never negelct my duty as your son, Mae and Por...", it was his last words to them.

However, Mrs. Rojnapat wasn't done yet. As his mother who carried him for 9 months in her womb and delivered him into this cruel world, she wouldn't let him go so easily. It was her last chance to make him stay. „Can't you reconsider your decision?", tears filled her eyes. She looked like she would go on her knees to beg him to stay with her in Thailand anytime. It was hard for her to let go of her only child she loved so much. Even though she knew that Khun Kongpob had something to do with his unexpected decision to leave, she still didn't blame the man who was almost her son-in-law. She was sure it was too much for them to revive their love. „I don't know that happened between Khun Kongpob and you but I'm sure that both of you will sort it out. You're mature enough to talk about your problems to resolve it. You have a child between you and it's not easy to leave the little Sun behind. He'll ask for you, Arthit. What should we tell him if he asks for you?", she had to try everything to bring him to reason.

„Let Sun be my problem, Mae. I know how to take care of him... I'm sorry Mae but I made up my mind. I don't have anything or anyone holding me back here anymore. It's better for me to have a peaceful mind to recover in South Korea and find my happiness back...". It was a big lie. He wouldn't find any happiness if the person he wanted to spend his life with wasn't his Kongpob. He wouldn't smile anymore if his Sun wasn't in his life anymore. Even though he knew that it was impossible to find another source of happiness, he had to lie to his Mae to make her let him go. He went to his knees and took his mother's palms in his hands, „Please, try to understand me that I don't want to stay here anymore...", he leaned her hands on his cheeks to let her feel his sadness.

As a mother, she could feel his sorrows and fear through the small touch. It wasn't difficult to realize that he was suffering under the seperation with Kongpob. Still, she wouldn't lose him again like she did 3 years ago. Before she could say a word, her husband placed his hand on her shoulder to make her swallow back her words she was about to mutter. She looked at him whereupon he shook his head, speaking in his mind that she should let him be since it was his final decision. They wouldn't change his mind once he was determined to do something. If she really managed to make him stay then she would only force him here and he would be sad and regret it for the rest of his life. If she didn't want to see him suffer due to her forcing him to stay here then she should let go of the string she wanted to bind around him to keep him in Thailand. Her eyes were red and swollen since she kept on holding back her tears. As if she could read his mind, she nodded as agreed. Her tears finally dropped down her red cheeks, Arthit felt like a bad son for making his beloved mother cry. He leaned over and wrapped his arms around her to hug her tightly.

„I'm sorry, Mae... Please forgive the ungrateful son of yours... Please, stop crying Mae. I don't want to make you sad before I leave", Arthit mumbled through his many sobs. He felt sad when seeing his mother shedding tears upon his departure. It was too painful to leave his old parents behind. It was more painful to go without spending more time with Sun or Kong. He would take the night flight in two days to South Korea without bidding farewell with his son and Kongpob since it would be too painful to seperate from them. He came back without having any expectation but he had a brief romantic relationship with Kong, he met Sun and they could resolve all their misunderstandings of the past. It wasn't a mistake to come back to Thailand after all. He would cherish the moments he spent with Kongpob and Sun forever.

„It's fine", she said. She took him a tight hug too, patting on his back to comfort him. Now she felt guilty for bringing her only son to tears. According to her, Arthit suffered enough and should smile from now on. It wasn't easy for her to see him go further away from her but she agreed that he had to be somewhere he could find his peace and happiness, hoping that their relation would remain so beautiful and pure like always. She would visit him often in Korea and bring him his favourite foods so he wouldn't miss his mother's home cooking.

Mother and son had already clearified their wishes, Arthit thanked them for understanding him even if it was a difficult task for them do to. As he stood up to leave for his bedroom, his cellphone vibrated in his pocket. He took it out and saw „Kongpob <3" written on the screen. Instead of picking up the call, he was staring at it as if he just witnessed something he never had expected to happen. So indecisive was he to have a conversation with Kongpob now that he had decided to leave for good. He took a deep breath, giving himself more encouragement before picking up the phone. To his surprise, he heard a small voice speaking to him. A smile brightened his face as he recognized the voice from his little Sun.

„Mommy...", Sun cheered on the end of the other line. He seemed excited about something he couldn't wait to tell his mommy. Apparantly, Kongpob dialed the number for him since he insisted of having a phone call with his mother who didn't visit him 2 days for now.

„Sun...", Arthit's soft voice called the little boy's name. His heart warmed as he listened to the child's laughing, it sounded like music in his ear that was calming him down.

„Mommy, Sun wants play... When coming?"

Arthit promised his mother to take care of Sun but he was powerless toward the two year old boy. How should he teach him that he was leaving and wouldn't come back to him anymore? He had to admit that he would miss his Kongpob everyday but his heart shattered into pieces when imagining their son crying upon hearing that his mother left him behind again. His hand gripped his chest tight, he felt thousand sharp knives stabbing his heart, guilt overwhelming him. He fought against his tears to not cry in front of him. Sun was just a young child but he was sharp like his father. He would notice that something was wrong with his mommy if he cried then he would tell his father about it. Kongpob shoulnd't know that I'm leaving for good... I don't want him to hold me back because he's guilty of what happened to me. He shouldn't stay by me just because of his guilt...

„I'll see you tomorrow at uncle Bright's and aunt Kanita's wedding then I'll paly with you to your heart content. Make sure that you wear a cute smkoing to surprise mommy, okay Sun?", it was more than enough to calm down Sun and make him smile brigthly.

To receive a compliment from his beloved mommy was always the best thing that happened to Sun. Nobody would explain it why he adored his mother who wasn't his true mother but a victim of the woman who brought him to this world. He was always looking forward to see Arthit play and compliment him. He always seeked for his mother's attention, always wanted to make his mother happy, smile and laugh. Everything around him resolved his mother only. It would be difficult for Arthit to let go of such sweet boy whom he had attached in his heart already. Would he be able to leave his son behind? Would he even be able to live peacefully wihtout seeing and taking his everyday dose of Kongpob? Kong who was his everyday dose, his drug, his heart, his love, his passion and his happiness.

I'll miss you, my dear Sun. Please forgive me for lying to you. You'll understand me someday why I had to go far away... Arthit stood on one of the step of the stairway, unable to move on.

End of Flashback

After having a flashback of yesterday's conversation with his parents, Arthit was indulged in his own sadness. He didn't want to pity himself anymore but intended to move on from his past with Kongpob. He would forget him and live his life till he grew old and ceased to be. It then would be the day he would find his peace!

Bright, being an idiotic drunk, couldn't keep his hands to himself. He was touching his newly wife here and there while mumbling how beautiful she was but he maintained his gentlessness to not anger her with his childish behaviour. Even if he was drunk, he remained respectful to her by never touching inappropriate parts of her body that only he should see in their bed. He would have their privacy later. She blushed as he whispered to her that he looked forward to have an unforgettable first night after the wedding with her. Arthit couldn't help but giggle in embarrassment. Bright wasn't reluctant to such kind of intimacy. As he looked around, he saw his friends busy with their partners beside them. Aim, May, Toota and his boyfriend were all playing in the sea. Wad and Ai'Prem were having a stroll on the beach. P'Seung Il was long gone, probably having a phone call with his wife somewhere close to them. Even Knott and his girlfriend were in their own world, he had his arm around her, keeping her close to him. They were enjoying the beautiful view in front of them, avoiding seeing his childish friends playing in the water like four years old kids.

Arthit felt out of place, he was alone without any partner. He smiled at them, his smile filled with sadness, guilt and regret. Somehow, he blamed himself for not talking with Kong sooner to clear the misunderstandings between them. The lack of communication brought the two of them to their downfall ,something he would always blame himself for and always regret. How much he wished Kongpob was there to keep him company, having his arm wrapped around him like Knott was doing with his girlfriend. Or playing with him in the water like May and Aim were doing. Or whispering sweet words in his ear like Bright was doing with Kanita. Or having his attention on him only like P'Seung Il always did whenever he was talking with his wife, he would let her speak and only listen to her. He raised his glass that was still half filled with red wine at the newly wed then he drank the rest in a go. He stood up to leave the place he wasn't feeling welcomed anymore. Everything found their right place and he shouldn't disturb them anymore with his never ending problems.

Arthit distanced himself from them by going back to the wedding hall. He waited after taking a few steps away then turned back to look at his friends. Even Knott who was always aware of his feelings didn't notice him go away from them. He was so busy with his girlfriend that he forgot about Arthit. Not that he complained, Arthit was more than happy that the calm one of them finally found his soulmate. At least, he wouldn't have time to care for him anymore. His best friend deserved a peaceful life after the sufferings he went through with him 3 years ago.

He stole a last glance of them to engrave this picture deep in his memory since it would be the last time he would see them in Thailand. „...I wish you a blissful future, my dear friends...", his eyes were shining under the dim light that the fullmoon was giving them from above. He mumbled calmly with a heavy burden on his chest, „I'll miss you guys... Farewell...". With a sad, forced smile on his face, he continued his way to the hall, distancing himself from them.

From 2 days on he would only talk to them on phone to keep contact with them. Maybe they would visit him in South Korea but he didn't have any intention to visit them in Thailand. He would leave his homeland behind and never come back again. 

****

The morning came faster as Arthit could had wished. He just bought some souvernirs for his Phee's wife and for himself as remembrance of his homeland. After the short shopping, he had a small feast with his parents for his departure. It was now nighttime, a day after Bright's wedding. Arthit and P'Sung Il were sitting on one of the bench in the hall of the airport, Knott had found a seat across his best friend, his arms crossed over his chest. There was an awkward silence between them although there were many noises coming from all direction echoing in the air, sounds like planes starting off or coming down, passengers sitting and chatting while waiting for their flight. P'Seung Il just sat there reading his book he hold in his hands but to be honest he wasn't reading anything. He was more interested in the glaring contest between Arthit and Knott so he wasn't even aware that he had kept his book upside down.

Knott was giving some death glares towards his best friend, the latter ignoring him the whole time even though he sensed his murderouns glares shooting in his direction. Apparanrly, the bulky man was not content with his best friend sudden decision to leave. This time he had the intention to never come back. It annoyed him that he, again, was the only one in their clique who knew about his plan to „escape from N'Kongpob". Yeah, he called Arthit's decision „his way to flee from Kongpob" instead of naming it his plan to recover in South Korea. He knew that Arthit was running away again. He sighed while having his hands in his pocket, catching P'Seung Il's and Arthit's attention with his odd silence and nonstop sighing.

„What now?", the shorter man was irritated with his odd behaviour that wasn't usual at all. He could sense that he had something in his mind but was reluctant and indecisive to tell him about it, thinking if he was choosing the right decision or not.

Knott stretched out his hand to Arthit, a letter was in his palm. Arthit didn't take the message that was left for him but narrowed it first. Before his best friend could ask him to take it, he threw another question in the air.

„What's this?", Arthit couldn't help but interrogate him about it. He didn't want to buy an insurance or sell his soul to the devil without knowing the content of it first.

„Can't you see it? It's a letter, you dumbass...", Knott replied annoyed.

Arthit raised one of his eyebrown, mustering Knott from head to toes then narrowing the letter again. It was the first time that Knott, the quiet one of their clique, was pissed off that he even raised his voice at him. He stretched his hand out but he waited a second before accepting the envelope. He opened the envelope to read its content. His eyes flew over the handwriting, he had to admit that he didn't recognize that scrawly handwriting that reminded him of Sun's handwriting when the little boy tried to write something that didn't make a sense at all. Maybe the person writing it was sick and had a hard time to write those words properly. After taking a deep breath, he began reading the content without giving a sound from himself.

Dear P'Arthit,

I know that it's weird from me to write you this letter since I didn't have a healthy relation with you but I feel the need to convey you my feelings through this letter before I lose all my senses again. I have to make, at least, something up to you or else I can't leave in peace while knowing that you're stil seperated from your love because of me. I's not easy for me to bring those words onto paper, you could even see it from my bad handwriting that I had a hard time to hold the pen in my hand.

I kow that I did many hurtful things to you and I won't ask for your forguveness for it. I can't forgive myself for what I did to both of you so I won't ask you to forgive me. I'm the devil who took your lover away. It's not an excuse but I want you to know that I really loved Kongpob and wanted to have him for me only that's why I did so many ridiculous things to you. From the first moment I saw Kongpob that night as he protected me from my ex boyfriend, I thought of him as mine... I wanted him at any price and ended up hurting you badly and destroying your relationship that you build for years. But I was just delusional with my wish because he was yours from the beginning. I shouldn't had meddle with your lives. Because Kongpob belongs to you and you belong to me. I don't have any place in his heart. Even though I tried to use my skill to hypnose him, he didn't succumb to me at the end. Kongpob never slept with me nor made an advance toward me. Whenever we were together, he only smiled when he is talking about you and showed how much he cared for you. Because he never gave me the attention I wanted from me, I attacked you instead to make you lose trust in him. Now I know that I'm the devil just like many called me in my hometown. I'm ashamed of myself. I even hate myself for hurting so many people who just tried to help me.

I have to make another confession to you. I was the one who used P'Net for my goal. Since I knew from his unrequited feelings for you, I managed to convince him to abduct you by force. P'Net never had the intention to hurt you but I controlled him through hypnose to make him hurt and wanting to kill you. Even if he couldn't kill you, I still used him to torture you so you would lose your mind. Now everything is hunting me back. I'm losing myself just like you did when you was kidnapped and locked up in P'Net's basement. Maybe, I'm paying for the evil mistakes I did to Kongpob and you.

Please, P'Arthit forgive Kongpob for me because he, too, was just a victim of mine. For me, he was a tool I used to achieve my own goals. Maybe I just wanted him at all coast because I couldn't bear it to see you two as a lovely couple. I didn't want to admit that Kongpob loves you more than himself that's why I intended to seperate you and show you that nobody could resist my charm. I wanted to prove myself that I could have every man I set my eyes on. I had the urge to destroy your life and take your happiness away who was Kongpob. But at the end, I failed miserably. I hurted many people who were dear to me because of my selfishness. Let me make it up to you by leaving this world forever and give you the peace you deserve.

P'Arthit, I'm sorry for everything I did to you. Please, enjoy your life with Kongpob. Please, forget the painful past, about me, P'Net and Lek... May you have a happy life with Kongpob.

Arthit felt chill running down his spine while reading Dalika's last message shortly before her suicide. The letter was more like her last will she conveyed through this message before she commited suicide. It left a nostalgic and unforgetable feeling after reading the concent of the letter a dying person left for someone. He was emotional but he hold back his emotions. She died years ago and he should let go or her now. Since he decided to leave the past behind, he shouldn't bathmouth her. However, he wouldn't forgive her for her past deeds. „...What's the use for giving this to me now?", Arthit asked, his eyes still staring at the letter that contained some dried tears, meaning that she cried while writing him this letter. He looked up and gazed at Knott's eyes, only pain reflecting in his eyes. Now that he was determined to leave, he gave him this letter to confuse him. Did Knott want him to change his decision by giving him this dying message?

„I...", Knott couldn't find the right words to put his feelings in words now. He put his hands in his pockets then looked sternly at Arthit. „Arthit, I have to give it to you to stop your from your ridiculous plan."

„Come on, Ai'Knott. It's not your style to use other's belongings to convince us. You're the soft one among my friends and can convince me with your sentimental words only. You don't need such dying message to hold me back". His eyes wandered at the envelope he had to tear apart to get to the letter. It looked perfeclty fine as if Dalika just handed it to him. Besides, he knew that Knott would never open and read it without his permission. It seemed that Ai'Knott guarded it very neatly to give it to him someday. „She died more than 2 years ago... Don't tell me that you had it this whole time?"

Knott nodded, „She gave it to me shortly before she commited suicide but I couldn't give it to you sooner."

„Why not? It's not like you to hide something from me..."

„I didn't know the content of this letter, Ai'Arthit. What if it contains something negative and it detoriated your health while you're recovering? I couldn't give you something I was unsure of...", it was the truth. He kept this letter for over 2 years because he couldn't detect Dalika's true reason for writing this message for him. He thought that she wanted to confuse him like she always did so he hide it till he would find a suitable day to hand it to him to read. According to Knott, the day should be the day Arthit finally recovered, came back to N'Kong and wouldn't be affected with her menaces anymore. This day was today, he gave it to him with the purpose of changing his mind.

Arthit hold the letter in front of him, „Do you want to read it?"

His best friend shook his head, „No thanks... Maybe you should let N'Kongpob see it too?"

„I won't give it to him by myself, Ai'Knott...". He put the white paper back in its original envelope then let it in Knott's palm. „I know the truth yet and don't have any use for it now. Give it to N'Kongpob later after I'm gone". He stared at some shops near him then went in one of the shops that sold toys for children. There was a beautful white teddy bear with a recorder in it that caught his attention. A smile brightened his sad face when he caressed the head of the toy, imagining Sun's bright smile when the little boy saw the gift he brought for him. The farewell gift! After buying it, he searched for a calm corner where he could be alone but he found a place near the restroom. He leaned his back against the wall, his lips cuved up to smile and make his gloomy expression less sad. As he pressed on the button on the teddy's hand, he spoke some words to record it... My little Sun, don't be angry and hate Mommy, na... Please, forgive mommy for going away again... Mommy loves you, my son... His eyes teared up but he kept the tears back. 

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So this is part one of the final but don't worry about the sadness in this part... Wait for part 2 to be updated in a few minutes ;)