Time. Time is a very playful word, used, to term the loop of seconds and minutes. This loop keeps on going, forevermore, without a stop yet the Kario's moment; often connected to grief, makes a ceasing effect on the revolving world around one.

But don't get this feeling wrong, it isn't only related to grief but also, with longings.

Some psychologists use the word to represent thoughts and feelings about all facets of life that are unfinished or imperfect, paired with a yearning for ideal alternative experiences.

And there this lost soul, lies longing for something, for someone. I was the one who had it all. I am the master of my fate.

The invisible vibrations of my invincible longings, tortured my trials of living. How insensible!

But who am I to blame?

Things don't work the way I wish, the way I cherish.

Lost in my lonely tower of inevitable thoughts, I felt the presence of a buff figure outside of my door. That scent of wood diffused in my room and I instantly knew who he was. He was Yeonjun, Dr. Yeonjun.

"Hey!" He opened the door and blimmed his sweet smile at me, which I reciprocated.

"How are you feeling?"

I wasn't sure of the answers to his question. My perception of events within the body, closely related to emotions, was uncertain and invalid. While emotions are associated with bodily reactions that are activated through neurotransmitters and hormones released by the brain, feelings are the conscious experiences of emotional reactions. And judging my current emotional trust, was a challenge itself.

"I'm... Okay, I guess." I replied with a tint of enquiry for myself.

"You guess?" I nodded.

"Well then let me help you out. Does it hurt you? Are you tired? Do you miss something? Or maybe... Love something?"

I started at his face with a blank physiognomy, unable to decipher how he reached the point of missing and loving.

I wouldn't say I'm missing someone, but yearning for someone. Someone I don't know.

I wish to be someone's someone. I have no one, nobody. Yet in these recent days, my heart mourns to be close to someone.

"I... I don't know."

"Understandable. We didn't talk much, did we?" He started.

"We didn't."

"Hmm. I am free, let's talk to you." He pulled the chair she had been sitting, and seated himself to his ease.

"I am bad with conversations." I confessed, trying to be honest and avoid chats. I am afraid to speak with people and although it's not like I don't know this man, I am insecure.

"No hay problema. Lo empezaré (No problem. I'll start it.)"

"Muchas Gracias. (Thank you so much.)"

"You speak Spanish too?" He bent his body, closer to me and I sat up, relaxing my back on the pillows. Atleast, I know something he won't find strange.

"I do. I took Spanish classes in 5th grade. You also seem to know the language."

"I do. I mean, I didn't learn it but taught myself over a coarse of 2 years."

"Why? Was there some reason? Only if you're cool to share."

"Mi crush es mitad hispano. I am trying to impress her. (My crush is Hispanic.)" He blushed at his efforts of impressing someone he loves.

"Es bueno oir eso. All the best.(That's great to hear.)"

"And umm... I was wondering, how did you manage to cover all the subjects you qualify in."

"Here we go again." I mentally cursed myself, fed up of repeating the same thing over and over.

"So... It doesn't happen in this century. I am not from this century. I know you won't believe me but... It's the truest truth I can spill." Saying so, I prepared myself for another round of weird stares which I have come to realise, is just common and normal.

"I actually... Do believe you. El diagrama que dibujaste, ¿no era un Tesseract? (The diagram that you drew, wasn't that a Tesseract.)"

"You know the tesseract theory?" I enquired.

"Yes, of course I do. But the tesseract calculation is yet to be derived. And looking at how you solved the first few steps with much ease, as if it's your regular basic preparation, made me question my reality. I wouldn't be surprised to hear things that seem to be weird. All scientists are weird before their inventions."

"Finally! Someone who's willing to understand me!" I yelled a low screech, rejoicing the discovery of someone who wants to know me.

"Hey, hey! Don't get excited. You've recovered your attack and that's good to know."

"I feel much better and I'm really grateful for that. But the bills? How will I pay those? I don't want Y/n noona to pay those. She has already done way too much for me, for a complete stranger. I am exhausted of thinking about her hurtings."

"That's what I don't want you to do. I don't want you to overthink. I heard how you met Y/n and you know, I wouldn't have taken you in if I was a woman like Y/n with a past like her. But she did. And now that she has, trust her. Let her get stable and help her do that.

We don't always need people to repay us with money, dollar bills, property, estates. We need someone to hold us when we're falling down. When we are dead and they become our only reason to try yet again. Not a gain. Never a gain, yet again.

Here's your bag. I picked it up. Try doing something other than trying to survive without anyone. Learn to survive with the one. Meet you soon."

__________________________________

"The rain shall pour again,
Painting the pastel shades of warmth
Or shall it;
Picture the soreness of a gloomy
Heart, that had cried through
The caligineous night,
With nothing bright,
No light.

Alone under this leaky roof,
I sit staring at this nebulous sky
That shoots arrows,
Arrows of peace yet cry.
The tranquil smell of the moist mud
Somewhat feels like that vanilla,
You wore when we first met;
The rain drops look like those
Hazel orbs, deeper than the ocean;
Pretty as lotus:
An indescribable emotion.

This can't be true, can it?
This feeling of sinking in those
Oceanic eyes,
Deeper and deeper...
With every passing second.
I feel her:
Her smile, Her hair...
Her smell, Her touch...
Her vibe, Her Aura;
That brightens my darkness,
Like the Aurora,
In my freezing winter."

Closing my anthropology of poems, I sat there, staring outside at the starry night sky while waiting for her.

I played a light piano music on my Spotify and waited for more hours to pass.

I didn't have anyone visit me today except for that 'pick me' young nurse.

I needed to do something recreational, and get over the fact that, that stupid nurse has been trying to hit on me.

Time is nothing but a slow ride and I like things floating fast. Can I please fast forward this boredom?

It started raining, just how I was anticipating, ruining my mood and vibe. I wanna get by her side and hold on. I wanna float away with her in a cruise to nowhere.

"Ahh! Why is everything so boring? I need somebody who can love me at worst and see me at my best. Is that too much to ask?" I rolled on the bed while singing retro songs, my favourite way to pass my time.

"Why are you so annoying? Can't you just do something productive?" I was feeling like a worthless alpha whose wolf was ready to dump him because he was yet again, worthless.

"If only I could do something. I want to go home." I complained to my own self.

"Stop your shit, will you? Just write a question for the woman you've commited to tutor. You're really dumb, aren't you?" My inner instinct fired at me.

"Yah! Yah! You don't have to be so rude to me. I know I'm dumb. Wait, doesn't that make you dumb too?"

"Yah! Don't talk back on me, you disobedient little brat. Just do what I suggested, will you?"

"Alright, Alright." I rolled my eyes on my partner and started joting a series of questions based on Euclid's Geometry on my notebook. I scrolled through the browser and searched for interesting questions and altered them accordingly.

Writing work sheets was my pleasurable way of doing something productive and useless at times.

I checked the clock and kept on writing questions, I wanted her to be unable to answer.

"Hey, so called wolfie, what else should I add here?" I asked my non existent partner.

"Worksheets need not to be only on syllabus. Add anything that a person learns, atleast till 10th grade."

"Got it!"

I was going to add my favourite part of mathematics in the paper, algebra and trigonometry. I giggled sheepishly, knowing how much Y/n will hate me, but do I care? Of course not.

I love annoying people.

I moved my hands faster, like a field sprinter on a race track. I was initiating to finish this before the clock struck 11:00 and I was determined to do so.

"Done!" I clicked my pen down as my timer gave the alert of 11:00. I grinned proudly at my Wolfie who just happened to huff at its own defeat.

But that's me again, right?

Does that mean I won and lost against myself?

"Sunoo?" I turned around at the door and saw Yeonjun standing with his backpack, hanging over his shoulder.

"Yeh?" I asked.

"I'm leaving for home. Wanna go back now? Your discharge papers are ready, they won't let you be here for long."

"Oh! Umm... Noona won't come?"

"I don't know. I haven't heard from either of the women of the group, today. Maybe tired of classes and jobs. I'll drop you."

"And the bills?"

"You don't need to pay. I did it free of cost. I'm the doctor anyways."

"But..."

"Está bien, hermano.  Estoy bien con eso. (It's okay, brother. I'm okay with it.)"

"Te estoy agradecido. (I'm grateful to you.)"

"Come on?"

"Claro, senor.(Sure, sir)"

_______________________________

Hey Rosairises

Sorry for the short chapter
This was actually of no use but to let you know that time will be running faster.

Had somewhat a busy day
And am exhausted.

How was your day?
Good, I hope.

And the Spanish sentences have a reason in the book, yet more precisely I added them just because this summer,I took Language Studies as my hobby.

Hangul and Spanish were what I can say I "LEARNT" a little.

These were apparently the words and sentences I learnt and hopefully, I placed them correctly.

If you're a Hispanic Rosairis or know Spanish, correct me if I'm wrong.

And a
BIG HAPPY BIRTH DAY TO OUR GOODIE BOY!
LEE HEESUNG!!!