I was planning to publish this on Friday, but it's Jimin's birthday and this is a Jimin chapter, so I thought it'd be fitting. Hope you enjoy, and happy birthday Jimin!!! 생일 축하합니다!!!

One day after elimination, Y/n found herself in her car. She pressed her head against the window as her ears danced to the harmonic whistling happening next to her. A hand rested itself on her thigh, rubbing the skin there. She was quick to rest her hand on top of his, but he took it a step further by taking it and bringing it to his lips, kissing the back of her hand.

She gave him a small chuckle and turned, Jimin's eye smile coming out as he stopped her car at the red light. "You sure you know where you're going?" she asked, Jimin placing their hands back down on her thigh. He was pretending he wasn't hurt from elimination. Apparently not addressing the problem was his way of handling it.

"I have my GPS on," he said, motioning with his head to the phone propped up on the holder clipped on the vent. "Thanks for letting me drive. It's rare I get control in my life."

"And here I thought you hated cars."

"Oh always," he said with a wink, pressing on the gas as the light flicked back to green. "Well, I don't hate them, but I don't like them either. I only have my license cause I feel like I have to. It's like a way of having freedom. Imagine I had to walk to get McDonald's. That'd suck."

Y/n snorted. "You know what else sucks? Me."

"You're pretty good at it too."

She gave his shoulder a playful whack as he made the next turn, slowing his speed and narrowing his eyes to concentrate on the road. Time passed as they fell into a comfortable silence. Y/n liked silent car rides so she could stare out the window and fall into her imagination. The fake scenarios she could come up with were more detailed than any movie she had ever seen. It brought her joy, but also pain to know they could never come true.

By the time they pulled up to her home, Y/n didn't want to leave her imagination. However, the desire to see Angelica drove her enough to unbuckle, and she departed without waiting to see if Jimin was behind her. She was sure the man would go wherever she would, which was both admirable and scary. Not because him following her around was scary, no. In fact, she loved his company. It was more a mental thing: what if she hurt him and broke his heart?

Speaking of, right as she strode up to her front door, she was halted by Jimin clearing his throat from mere feet away. She halted, swiveling around and watching as the sunset illuminated Jimin's natural skin tone. He had no makeup on, revealing his honey skin. The lighting revealed the little cracks on his face. She could see each pore and crevasse, and it only made her adore him more.

"Before we go in, can I ask you something?" he said, his voice quivering for a moment too long. She motioned for him to continue, and he took a deep breath. "Were you going to eliminate me?"

His eyes were cracking, but she could tell he was attempting to hold it together. She appreciated the effort, but she knew it wouldn't matter. Not when she couldn't bring herself to lie, and when they both already knew the answer. "Yeah..."

Jimin rubbed his lips together, nodding and kicking at the ground. "Then why am I here?"

"Jungkoo-"

"No," Jimin said, his voice harsher than she was expecting. "You aren't a liar, don't start lying now. I told you I don't care if you eliminate me or not. It'll hurt, but I understand I might not be the one for you. I'm not asking because I want to guilt trip you or some bullshit like that. I'm asking so I get closure."

He had a point. If she was going to eliminate him, he at least deserved to know why. "Jimin," she said, and he sniffed back his tears. "I think I'm in love with you."

It took him a few seconds to realize what she was saying. When the words clicked, his eyes bulged, and he stormed forward. She went to speak again, but he interrupted her by placing his lips over hers. They kissed under the light of the setting sun, the kiss softer than she was expecting. Jimin was a passionate kisser, but this time, he restrained himself and chose to give her delicate movements instead of fast ones.

He parted from her, letting out a breath that danced around her mouth. "Were you scared?" he asked, and she nodded. It wasn't a lie. Although she believed eliminating Jimin was the logical choice, there was a personal reason too: she was terrified. The idea of enjoying herself and letting herself fall in love sent a wave of horror through her body. Why couldn't she just let go? Was it pride? Sorrow? Guilt? For some reason, guilt seemed like the best answer.

Jimin kissed her again, rubbing his lips over hers and sending pleasure through her veins. Her legs trembled from the way he put all his emotions into one kiss, and he pulled her up against his chest to deepen it. By the time he was satisfied, he gazed at her, refusing to let the eye contact break.

"Just let me love you," he whispered, and she found herself agreeing without any protest. All her thoughts were silenced the moment her ears heard those words drop out of Jimin's mouth. His voice was hypnotizing. What was normally a light, energetic tone turned into a deep one that lit up every cell inside her.

And just like that, they were kissing again, Jimin keeping his hands on her cheeks and groaning into it. Both of them wanted to take it further. They needed to feel pleasure after the hell that had been reality TV, but they had jobs to do. Y/n missed her sister dearly, and her stomach did a flip at the thought of Jimin meeting her.

They decided they had to move, and Jimin parted from her, holding her hand as he brought her over to the door. They entered, Y/n calling out to Angelica, who was in the kitchen as she expected. That girl had a love of food that matched Jin's, and as soon as Y/n and Jimin walked in, they spotted her sitting on the counter with a spoonful of ice cream shoved in her mouth. She was quick to swallow it, place the tub of ice cream down, and clear her throat.

"Hey Y/n, hey... very attractive stranger who I hope is Y/n's boyfriend so we get cute babies," Angelica said.

"Angelica!" Y/n said with a yelp. Jimin laughed, his squeaky sounds coming out. "He's one of the competitors on the show, this is Jimin. Jimin, this is my sister."

"It's a pleasure to meet you," he said, offering her his hand.

She shook it albeit confused. "It's nice to meet you too. Don't take this the wrong way, but why is he here? Are you guys filming something?"

"Oh no, he's just my moral support," she said, Angelica quirking a brow. Y/n wished to say it, but she didn't want to upset Angelica or Jimin. Especially Jimin. But fate had other plans.

Jimin dropped his tone. "I... had cancer," he said, hiccupping over the word 'had'.

"I'm so sorry," Angelica said, Jimin brushing her off.

"It's okay." Based on the way his tone quivered, it really wasn't, but Y/n knew better than to pry. Not that she had a chance to, seeing as Jimin turned to her. "Where's your bathroom?"

She pointed, and he went in that direction, Y/n bringing her attention to Angelica. They sat at the kitchen table, Y/n folding her hands together. Before she could speak, Angelica burst out laughing, Y/n huffing. Oh yeah. She knew what her dear sister was about to say.

"He's so in love with you."

"You figured that out from like 5 seconds of knowing him?" Y/n asked, Angelica humming.

"And you're in love with him." Y/n couldn't bring herself to disagree. "It's pretty obvious. Why else would you bring him and only him here to meet me? And why else would he agree to come? We both have experience with cancer, sure, but you brought him so I could approve of him, didn't you?"

"Honestly, no." At Angelica's confusion, Y/n sighed. "I don't know what I'm doing. I didn't want to burden you with this since you have enough going on, but..."

Angelica reached across the table and took her sister's hand, giving it a squeeze. "Y/n, no matter what, we're sisters. No matter where you go, what you feel, or what you do, you'll never lose me. I'll always stay with you. You have no idea how grateful I am for you, sis. So please, whatever this is, don't feel like a burden. Even if I'm going through the worst stage of my life, I'll always have time for you. Always."

Y/n sniffled and nodded, returning the squeeze. "Jimin's special to me, but that's not the only reason why I brought him. I thought maybe he could help me understand what you're going through, and he'd be able to bond with you really well. I just... I didn't want you to feel alone. With me being gone all the time, I can't imagine how you're feeling."

"Y/n." She shut her mouth. "I'm okay. It's okay to worry about yourself for once. You don't have to live your life for me. Live it for you. Whatever emotions you're suppressing out of fear you're dishonoring me, please don't. You deserve to be happy."

"So do you," Y/n said with a voice crack.

"I am." Angelica paused to give Y/n a rapid nod. "I am. My sister is on a reality TV show for me. You made that sacrifice, and I can't express how much that means to me. We're gonna be okay, Y/n. Please, find happiness. Don't be scared."

"I can't remember the last time I allowed myself to be happy. Every time I do, I just get guilt," Y/n said, lowering her eyes to the table. "I'm pathetic, aren't I? I lived a life mostly in luxury, and I walked away from it just to complain about things I caused myself to go through. Maybe I deserve all this... pain? Misery? I don't know what to call it."

"Just because you're used to pain doesn't mean you deserve it." Y/n snapped her head back up to meet Angelica's patient gaze. "You're far from perfect, Y/n. I won't lie to you. You have your moments where you fail, you have your moments where you lash out and hurt others... but that still doesn't mean you deserve pain. Just because you're not perfect doesn't mean you should suffer. It's okay to not be perfect, and it's okay to allow yourself to be happy."

Y/n didn't realize she was crying until Angelica wiped her tears away for her. In the blink of an eye, Y/n got up with Angelica, and they embraced. Her whole life was always about the next step. It was always about the next shoot, the next show, the next event she'd go to. Maybe now, she could live for herself. Maybe now, she could find the happiness she deserved.

~~~

A few hours earlier, Y/n told Jimin to stay. Now that she thought about it, offering Jimin to stay the night might have been a bad idea, but she couldn't turn back now. After all, how could she resist him? He was shirtless, laying on her bed while reading a book on his phone. She was sitting at her wooden desk, but she couldn't focus on anything other than the man mere feet away.

It was dim, only a couple candles lighting the space. Y/n loved candles, and she put one on her nightstand. Her nightstand was close to Jimin, meaning the candlelight flickered across his face, highlighting each speckle of chestnut hiding inside his irises. Each crevasse of skin on his face was visible to her, his lips pursed while he read. She observed the way his eyes darted back and forth, absorbing whatever book he had. Knowing him, it was probably an action story. Maybe something with pirates. Apparently Jimin wanted to be a swashbuckler when he was a kid, and that filled Y/n with butterflies. It was weird, but for some reason, Y/n wanted to learn all about his childhood. Out of respect for him and his past with cancer, she never asked. She figured he'd tell her when he was ready.

Figuring that she wouldn't be able to focus on the bills in front of her, she blew out the candle. The walls, that were a scarlet red, appeared black thanks to the lights going out one by one. She blew out the one on top of her dresser too, going to her bed and shimmying herself next to Jimin.

Just like that, he shut off his phone and placed it by the candle, turning so his full attention was on her. "Hey," he said, his voice a whisper.

"Hey," she replied, coming a bit closer. Not like she had much choice. The bed was queen-sized, which meant there was plenty of room, but not enough for them to sleep on complete opposite corners of the fluffy mattress. Truthfully, the mattress was the most expensive thing she owned. It was covered by sheets that matched her walls, her pillows the same way. Of course, she had 4 pillows.

"Come here, I want to hold you."

Y/n did as she was told, and she pressed herself against his chest, shutting her eyes and burying her head on his shoulder, right by his neck. She heard him take a quick breath, almost like a gasp. Then, his arms wrapped around her, pulling her even closer than before.

It was silent for a while. They had nothing to say, especially since the day had been so long. They were exhausted. Between Jungkook leaving and the show being more than halfway done, they were a bit stressed. It was ironic, wasn't it? Y/n hated decision-making, yet here she was. Her whole purpose on the show was to decide who was good enough to be with her. But that was just the thing: she barely thought she was good enough for herself. How could she make such choices? She felt evil for even considering eliminating the boys, let alone actually doing it.

Jimin kissing her head brought her out of her thoughts. She swiveled her head upwards, and the little gap between them had her shuddering. His lips were centimeters away. Although she had been close with others before, this was an intimacy she forgot existed. They weren't doing anything dirty. Hell, they weren't even kissing. Yet somehow, this seemed more intimate than anything else. Yes, above the time Jimin and her had sex, too.

"Y/n," he said, his breath tickling her lips. She didn't reply, hoping he took it as a sign to keep talking. "You can eliminate me. It's okay."

"Wait what? But-"

"I understand it'd add drama to the show, and with the next elimination being one of the last ones, I'd understand. You don't have to apologize to me." He took a second to show his painful smile, his eyes swelling with moisture. "It's okay, honey. This was fun, I'm ready to start a new adventure now."

Her face dropped, and she realized why he was so emotional now. It wasn't because of the elimination. It wasn't because of her, or Angelica, or any of the boys. The realization shattered her in two, and she sat up, staring at him with her jaw dropped. He parted his gaze from hers, clutching the sheets and dropping his head.

"Jimin," she said, breathless. "Don't tell me..."

"It's back," he replied, finally gaining the courage to meet her eyes. His tears fell, and Y/n had to fight to hold back her horror. "My cancer's back."