"Alright, since none of you can ever talk about only books, why don't you update me on how your week has been? We will start with Asha." Aubrey announced starting the meeting, and Asha glared at her.

"You know how my week has been! You invited Aliens into our home!" Asha shouted, then crossed her arms and looked pissed.

"I see you're still salty about that, Tori; how about you?" 

"It's been great! I made lots of treats for us, plus my baking business is booming!" Tori replied, and Linda glared.

"It's booming because you and Stacey decided to start illegally selling "treats" with pot in them," Linda said, still annoyed that illegal activities were happening in her home.

"Don't hate the hustle, Linda; you're just jealous, Tori, and I make more in a week than you do in a month," Stacey said, and Linda rolled her eyes.

"Yeah, well, let me know when you need a lawyer."

"Alright enough, Gretchen, how about you?" Aubrey asked, trying to move away from wherever that conversation was going. 

"It's been fine, except for all the fights I've had to break up," Gretchen responded, and before she could continue, Aubrey moved along.

"Fabulous! Caren? Not that I care about you." Aubrey said and looked at her. Caren started crying like a lunatic, of course.

"Penny threw me out of her store! Then Stacey beat me up because she's mean! Everyone hates me; it isn't fair!" Caren wailed, and Linda looked at Stacey, grinning.

"You can make whatever pot treats you want in my house; you're the greatest." Linda laughed, and Stacey smirked.

"I know, right? I'm proud of the accomplishment." The two fist-bumped, and Caren continued to sob.

"See what I mean!" Aubrey rolled her eyes.

"You are so fucking dramatic; this is why we pick on you. Get the fuck over it, crybaby. How's your week been, Lori?" Caren continued to cry but was ignored; Lori sat on Scarlett's lap, and she grinned.

"Fabulous, I have a job now, and while I've gotten into trouble a few times this week, the future is looking up," Lori said proudly, and everyone seemed shocked.

"Really? Damn, alright, that's great. Victoria?" Aubrey asked, and Victoria smiled evilly.

"Well, I'm great now my coffee beans are thriving, now that I took care of that mutt next door!" She said, forgetting Owen was there.

"I knew you had something to do with it! What did you do to my dog? Linda, did you lie to me?" None of them had ever seen Owen get that upset before, not that they cared. 

"I had it killed as it deserved!" Victoria replied proudly.

"I uh need a drink." Linda chuckled nervously and pulled out a flask.

"Seriously? What is wrong with you? You're a bitch!" Owen shouted at the two of them, mainly Victoria, though.

"Put that away; it is too early to be drinking!" Tori snatched the flask from Linda. 

"You say that like it's a bad thing!" Victoria challenged Owen, "at least I'm not a fraud!" 

Linda snatched her flask back and kept drinking, much to Tori's dismay. Aubrey had heard enough at this point, "Enough! Shut the fuck up! We are moving on! How about you, Linda?" 

"Oh, it's been fabulous; pick someone else." Linda didn't really give a fuck; she just wanted to drink in peace. 

"Great, Scarlett?" 

"It's been rad, to be honest; I love hanging with you." Scarlett said, then smacked Lori's ass, "and I love this hottie." 

"Stop doing that in front of people." Lori glared at Scarlett.

"Nah, I don't think I will." She chuckled, and Lori rolled her eyes.

"Anyways, Stacey?" Aubrey moved on, not wanting to see where that might go either. 

"It's been good, besides you kicking my ass at mortal kombat as usual." She hit her wax pen and glared.

"If you weren't always high, maybe you'd win, Courtney?" Aubrey responded with a chuckle.

"It's been good; Penny and I will launch our business soon! I've also been going to therapy because I'm well aware you all think I'm a Narc." She responded, and Aubrey rolled her eyes.

"Good on the business, but you are a narc; we don't just think that. Penny?" Aubrey said with an annoyed tone.

"Well, obviously, you know about the business, but let me be clear: I proudly threw Caren out of my store because she's a cunt. Although, you already knew that you were there." Penny responded with a smirk. 

"It was delightful, and I guess Owen?" She looked towards him, hoping he'd make it quick.

"My dog was murdered, but I got a new one, and I think you all need therapy, so my hours are 9-5." He muttered, and Aubrey sighed.

"You might be right for once, but anyways I've made friends with aliens; they are much better at picking literature than all of you, might I add. If I've spent time with any of you, that's already been established, but know I still hate all of you regardless." Aubrey responded with a glare. "Now, as for books, I really don't care what you've all brought, mainly because it's always trash, and I'm adjourning this meeting because I've had enough of all of you today." 

"Damn savage Aubrey, but are you sure you don't want to know what books we brought?" Lori said and raised an eyebrow.

"I'm genuinely concerned, but fine what did all of you bring?" Aubrey was highly suspicious, and they all held up the same book on their phones because it was a kindle copy.

"Monkey by Dave Chadwick. It's a must-read, and it's available for .99 cents on kindle for the remainder of 2022." Stacey piped up with a proud grin. 

"I can't believe you all brought the same book, and I feel like you did it to spite me. However, it is a good book, so I'll give you a pass." Aubrey responded, wondering how they knew she had brought that same book.

"So what'd you bring, Aubrey?" Asha asked since she told everyone so she could get petty revenge on her wife.

"Monkey by Dave Chadwick, you know what fuck you guys, and Asha, I know it was you, and that's some petty ass shit. You can sleep on the couch." Aubrey left and went to go consult with her alien friends about her day that did not go as planned.