I winced as I tried to get out of bed, it was already 2pm. I haven't went to school in about.. three days?

I told mom and dad it was because my knee was constantly hurting, and sure, there was pain for a day or so but that wasn't the reason why I stayed home. It was everything else. The kind of everything that constantly lived in my head whenever I thought of Aaron. The way I totally overreacted and messed everything up. The way he looked at me before he left.

Finally, I managed to get out of bed and I tiptoed down the stairs. Trying my best to not make any noise.

Mom and dad have been really... secretive recently. It's like they've both been hiding stuff from me. Whenever I'm around, and they're talking about something they don't want me to know about they whisper. Like if they whispered I wouldn't notice. Notice the way we haven't gone out to eat in weeks. Notice the way dad would sigh when he sees the bills.

It's pretty obvious what's going on.

And now they're at it again. Whispering about bills in the kitchen. Sure, they're not fighting, but their words are heavy.

"We're behind on this month's tuition," Mom whispered. "Are you sure we can afford to keep her in that school? Jason and Rebecca too."

My heart stopped.

"We'll be fine, really. One of my old buddies offered me a job. It pays... okay. We'll figure something out." Dad reassured, his voice lowering. " We always do.

The wooden stairs creaked and I closed my eyes, hoping they didn't notice I was standing there listening to them the entire time. As if if I closed my eyes I would just disappear and reappear back into my bed.

Mom smiled at me tightly. "Your leg okay?"

"It's getting better." I replied.

"You sure you don't want to go in today?" Dad asked, raising an eyebrow.

"It's 2 pm dad."

"Oh! Would you look at that! I didn't even notice." He responded smiling at me and mom. I smiled back.

"I'll go in tomorrow," I said looking down at me knee. "I shouldn't feel any pain by tomorrow."

Mom smiled, walking up to me, hugging me tightly. Shortly after, dad joined in.

"Thanks guys."

After eating a really late lunch, I headed back into my room. I sat there, reading our notes from the Battle of the Books. It's been like.. what? Two months since we started reading together every day, but it feels like I've spent a lifetime with him reading.

Although I was the one that wanted to end things with him, I still keep hoping. Hoping for his name to pop up on my phone. Hoping to see him show up at my window. But he doesn't. Just like how I didn't ask him to come back.

I briefly scanned through last year's yearbook. My eyes lingering on Aaron's. That's when I saw Ava. I never noticed how close they were until now. Sure, I was always sat next to him in yearbook photos but who else was next to him? Ava.

"What am I feeling right now?" I whispered to myself, laying down on back. I think I feel guilty... like an absolute asshole. But I'm also mad. Mad that it felt like he was leading me on. Mad that he didn't do anything to stop Ava. Mad that even though I was the one that asked him to leave, he still hasn't texted me.

I really thought skipping school would make things better.

It didn't.

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HELPP YALL I JUST REALIZED IVE BEEN FORGETTING TO POST THE PRE WRITTEN CHAPTERS IM SO SORRY 😭