Chapter 21 - His Soul is as Free as Mine

"Horizons are calling to us 

Distance is quieted by trust 

Torn apart by miles  

Held together by each other's smiles

We've passed with flying colors 

Time to turn our thinking forward 

Feel the soft spray of the ocean 

As we turn our faces toward it"

Although Ellie said it was just for fun, I knew that her true intentions with this was to take my mind out  of the whole Matthew-and-Aiden-situation. Everyone suddenly seemed to think my biggest concern was the fight, but I wasn't constantly thinking about it. As I had said, I couldn't care less about them.

But, nonetheless, there I was, in a Saturday morning, coming to Ellie's house to have a barbecue. It was a rather sunny day, so at least we had been lucky on that. It was almost time for lunch and me and Dylan were some of the last people to arrive. Ellie's parents had gone to a trip and I was only thanked that she decided to do a rowing barbecue instead of a high school party.

Ellie didn't invite anyone from our school except Dylan and I, and one or two more girls she was friends with, but the rest of the people were from rowing, which made me slightly happier.

In the previous day my fellow rowers had learned about Andrea breaking up with James. After our day on the beach we didn't talk more and we went back to our competitive status as if that day hadn't existed.

James didn't seem that affected by the breakup and neither was Andrea, of course, and they both had come to the barbecue.

Once we knocked on the front door, Cameron came to open it. I didn't even know he'd be here too, but I knew who was going to be delighted by that.

"Hello, guys!" He greeted us with his accent and we saluted him back.

"The barbecue is in the back, everyone is already there." Cameron stated, making a motion for us to enter inside the house and closing the door behind him. We followed him to the back of the house and I instantaneously felt the barbecue smell.

The back of Ellie and Cameron's house was big and had about thirty people on it. Ellie had invited mostly people from our rowing class and from Cameron's, so I knew almost everyone. There were grills with sausages and pork meat, long wooden tables filled with dishes and a hammock hanging from two trees.

"Hi, guys!" Ellie greeted us and Lori and Roxy came along. I saw Cameron and Lori exchanging glances when he moved from our group to meet his friends.

"You have an awesome house, Ellie." I declared and she smiled.

"Thanks!"

The next minutes were passed with me greeting other rowers. Dylan had stayed talking with Ellie and Lori but Roxy was with me. When we passed by James I told him "Hello" and he nodded. If we hadn't met on the beach we probably would have ignored each other, but now I felt the need to salute him.

"Since when are you and James in better terms than 'I'm going to ignore you because we are rowing rivals'?" Roxy questioned, a frown on her face.

I shrugged.

"You know about his and Andrea break up, right?" I asked and Roxy nodded. "I was there when they broke up. I went to the beach and they decided to end their wonder relationship there."

Roxy frowned even harder but before she could say something else a guy with jet black hair who appeared to be one of Cameron's friends stopped us.

"You're Kiara and Roxy, right?" He asked. We nodded but I sensed he was (thank God) more interested in Roxy than in me so I walked out of ther with an excuse and went to meet Ellie, Dylan and Lori.

After we hung out for some time I decided to sit at one of the tables. Dylan, Ellie, Lori, Roxy, Cameron and James were there too. Everyone started eating and talking and laughing and even though I didn't usually like parties and social events, I was enjoying myself.

After lunch I went to lay down on the hammock while I observed Lori and Cameron talking to each other (I know, I'm a creepy stalker). After some time, I turned my head to the other side and almost gasped when I saw James standing there, leaning against the tree, his arms crossed and a smirk on his face, staring directly at me.

I sat down on the hammock.

"What?" I asked him. He was the one acting creepily, right?!

"I never thought you would be the spy type." James stated. I shrugged.

"I wasn't spying... I was watching the blossom of love." I defended myself.

This time James was the one to shrug.

"If you say so. Why aren't you hanging out with the others?"

I looked over my shoulder to see Dylan and Ellie talking and Roxy with that black haired guy who was Cameron's friend.

And then, suddenly, something hit me. Stupidness. 

"James..." I started. "Do you think anyone will ever look at me the way Lori and Cameron are looking at each other? With those bright eyes and stupid smile?"

I didn't know why but with James I didn't feel that embarrassed or retracted to talk about certain things. Maybe it was the fact that, after all, I knew him since we were kids. Maybe we had never really exchanged words without provoking each other, but in some way I felt  comfortable with him, like the words we had never spoke now gave us a sense of familiarity around each other.

James made a small smile and sat next to me. Not a smirk. Not a half-smile. Just a simple smile.

"Why are you having those doubts?"

Well, I don't know, maybe because two guys are only interested in me due to a bet.

"I don't know." I finally declared. "But when I imagine myself in the future, I don't see myself getting married and settling down and having kids. I imagine myself as being an independent woman who travels around the world."

And maybe even confident people had their weaknesses and their doubts once in a while. I was confident and sure about myself, but still I had my insecurities about love.

"Well, if you really want to know what I think, I can see you as an independent and successful woman too. I just think you have a very strong personality that keeps you from being with someone else for the rest of your life. I'm like that too. I can't imagine myself staying with the same person forever and having my life revolving around that one person. I want to be free and independent without having to be attached to someone else. And I know this thoughts usually go against what society establishes, but that's what makes us brave souls. I know our way of thinking will be seen as selfish, but that doesn't matter; I think that what we really are, Kiara, is free souls."

I smiled. Never did I think James would agree with me, although he really didn't seem like the type of guy who would want to get married. 

"I don't know why it's so easy to talk about this with you." I admitted. "It's like... it's so easy to expose my doubts with you. And yes, we know each other since we were twelve but we never really gave each other the opportunity to actually be friends. We immediately saw one another as rivals and we never let ourselves see beyond that."

James nodded in agreement.

"I know. But we might... be friends outside the river, but in there all we are is rivals, understood?" He asked with a playful smile.

"I wouldn't want that to be any different." I honestly replied. I saw Dylan and Ellie staring at us and I understood that it was probably weird to see the two biggest rivals sitting together on a hammock and talking civilly.

But I didn't care. Like James had said, we were free souls, so I didn't have to give any explanations to neither of them. After all, Dylan didn't care when he made out with Janice and Ellie didn't care when she let herself flirt with Matthew and Aiden, right?

So I kept talking with James, something that I'd never expect to happen.

But honestly? It felt good.

-------------------------

The rowing competition was next weekend. The practices were getting harder and harder and everyone was focused on giving their best. I came home exhausted from working out so I didn't have much time to study, but I knew that after the competition I would have more free time, which eased down my parents that of course didn't want me to have a hard time on school because of rowing. If only they knew the real reason why school sucked. 

The week quickly passed. I was starting to get nervous, because I always got nervous before a rowing competition. Mine and Dylan's parents would go watch, as well as Ellie and Cameron's.

So the day finally came. The competition would start at 9 a.m but I would only compete at 11 a.m, though I had to be there at 8.45.

I went in my parent's car and Dylan and his parents would arrive later. When I got to the rowing club the warm feeling I always felt during rowing events filled me. I loved the environment: people from other rowing clubs were here, admiring our installations because they were one of the bests, teenagers meeting other teenagers and talking loudly, etc.

The morning was sunny and even warm so there were already shirtless guys walking everywhere, something my parents (okay, especially my dad) were shaking their heads about.

Me and my parents passed through the crowd of people until we got to the river's edge, where there was a bunch of people, and I saw Roxy and Lori already there. The first race was about to start.

"Hey, Kiara!" Lori and Roxy greeted. We chatted for a while longer until the first race actually started. The winner was from another rowing club so our club didn't start very well.

"I guess it comes to you and me to maintain our club's pride." I heard James say behind me.

I turned around and noticed my parents inspecting him. They knew me and him used to fight a lot so they were expecting the moment we would start arguing.

"Bad luck girls and boys can't race together. I'd beat you." I responded teasingly.

James snickered but his eyes were smiling.

"You wish."

"You two are not going to start arguing this time, are you?" My mom asked, but she was smiling too.

"No, Mrs. Raven." James answered politely. My mom seemed taken aback by his politeness but then her smile got even bigger.

"Good."

My father came near me and muttered "You and I will have to talk about boys later."

I rolled my eyes but smiled a bit, and then I saw Ellie and Cameron coming towards us. My mom had already met Ellie when she had helped us getting ready for the Halloween dance, but neither her or my father knew Cameron, so he introduced himself. I finally met Ellie and Cameron's parents, who were a petite lady and a tall man with kind smiles on their faces, just like their children.

The races went on and on and then Dylan finally came with his parents. Ellie seemed really happy to see him there.

"Good luck, Kiara." He wished.

"Thanks, Dylan." I smiled and hugged him.

Me, Ellie, Roxy and Lori were all going to compete in different races and mine was the first one. My heart was bumping in my chest while I went to the boat house to take my boat out. A guy that was from another rowing club helped me getting it out and once I got out of the boat house James approached me.

"Never thought I'd be saying this, but good luck, Kiara. Not that you need it, of course."

"Thanks, James." I smiled to him. "You're racing next, right?"

"Yeah."

"Good luck for you too." This time he was the one to smile.

"I'll be cheering for you." James then smirked and I was pretty sure he was lying. Because we never cheered for one another. But, outside the river we were friends, right? So maybe this year things could be different and maybe we finally could support our biggest lifetime rival. 

"Our stories make us stronger 

And I know we can afford it 

Don't ignore it; let it pull you closer and closer! 

All aboard, brave souls 

All aboard, brave souls 

All aboard, brave souls."

Music from this chapter is "Brave Souls" by Cozi Zuehlsdorff :)