At least a thousand goblins are guarding the gate to the city. A thousand ugly and menacing little beings wearing helmets and wielding swords and axes.

And they're chanting something. What? I can't tell.

I'm shaking all over. Really, my feet are quivering in their boots.

How can a creature so tiny be so terrifying? Am I right or am I right?

This is my first time seeing a goblin. I actually made a wish this year on my twelfth birthday, hoping to see one. I'm regretting that now. I should've wished for my magic to improve like every other year.

'Look at them all,' I say, peeking out from behind a tree. 'They must've been what we saw coming out of the blue cloud face thingy.'

The blue cloud face thingy is now the official name for what we saw.

'Let's hope they're the only creatures that came out,' says Mr Nos. 'But I have a feeling they weren't. We're talking about the Great Destroyer here. He doesn't deal with just goblins.'

I didn't need to hear that. Seriously, I really didn't. Thanks a lot, Mr Nos. Now I'm imagining whole armies of different horrible beasts waiting for us. This is not good. Not good at all.

'So how are we going to get into the city?' squirms Peni. 'Just with the gate closed without the goblins it'd be impossible. There are so many built-in charms on the thing. There's the Unseal Buster charm, the Climbing Buster charm, not to mention the Anti-flying Charm. My dad told me. The lord told him.'

'I don't even think the Knight could get passed,' says Hank.

Wow, that must've been hard for him to admit.

'You do know wizarding wrestling is fake, right?' Rachel says to him.

Um, excuse me. No, it's not. She must have a screw loose or something?

Hank looks at her blankly before bursting out a laugh.

I join in, chuckling myself. It's more of a nervous chuckle.

'Good one,' Hank eventually says. 'That's made me feel kinda better. Thank you. Wizarding wrestling fake? What a weird and funny thing to say.'

Rachel rolls her eyes.

'Have you ever seen a match?' continues Hank. 'How can you fake those moves? Those powerful spells? You can't. You. Just. Can't.'

'Can we do this some other time?' grumbles Eddy.

He does have a point. There are more pressing issues right now. But we should definitely continue this talk when the world isn't crumbling around us.

'How are we going to get into the city if we don't go through the gate?' Eddy asks.

'I know a way,' Emily speaks up. 'I found it while running away from a girl who wanted to test her wand on me. It's not going to be pleasant so be prepared. The entrance is around here.'

Wow. That's the most I've heard Emily speak.

And if anyone guessed she was talking about the sewers, a hundred points to them.

'Crap, this place stinks,' Eddy says several minutes later.

We're walking down a pathway next to a river of you-know-what.

You-know-what means poo, by the way.

'Yeah, I'm not impressed,' says Rachel, pinching her nose.

Oh, it more than stinks. It's putrid. The stench is stinging my eyes and burning my nose. With all the wizards and witches in the city, you'd think someone could make this place smell better. Surely, there's a spell to do it.

Seriously, though, what are people eating? It's probably those giant bloodsucking snails they sell at the market. Nothing good can come out after eating those.

'If anyone told me this morning I'd be walking by turd soup because of an army of goblins, I'd have given them a knuckle sandwich for talking garbage, says Eddy.

'I don't know much about the sewer system of the city,' says Peni, 'but I do know that it was built after the Great Tadmole Plague. That was not a nice time for the city. Tadmoles got everywhere, giving people droopy trunk noses and waffle feet. And did you know that once the sewage leaves the city, it goes to this magic extracting place. When we go to the toilet some of our magic leaves us. The city doesn't want it to seep into the environment so they take it out.'

'Don't know much, eh?' I say, shaking my head.

A sudden growl makes me and the others forget about the stench. A goblin then springs out from a corner up ahead, stopping us in our tracks.

Yeah, I definitely want to take that wish back.

'Halts,' it snarls in a high-pitched voice, brandishing a sword with sharp jagged edges. 'Whats are yous little pesky witches and wizards doing down heres?'

'Who are you calling little and pesky, you imp,' Eddy growls back with force.

I gotta say, Eddy sure has courage.

The creature screeches. 'How dares yous calls me that? I'm not a disgusting Imp, I'm a goblin.' It then charges at us.

'Stand back guys,' Mr Nos says, taking out his wand. 'Let me handle this.'

But he's too slow.

Me and the others shout out spells at the same time.

I have no idea what anyone else casts because all I hear is a jumble of words. But I cast a spell my parents use while hunting monster ghosts. Parumbi. It's supposed to stun.

Unfortunately, my spell and everyone else's does nothing to stop the goblin. It's still coming towards us, unscathed and terrifying. I can see the green warts on its ghastly face now.

How pathetic is that, right? Our magic sucks.

Some of our spells do hit someone, though. Mr Nos.

His hair starts smoking and his legs bind together, making him fall flat on his face.

OUCH. That's got to hurt.

'I said I'd handle it,' Mr Nos shouts angrily.

Peni tries to pat his smouldering hair but Mr Nos slaps his hand away and does it himself.

Mr Nos then says, 'Iskaru.'

The approaching goblin lifts up into the air and flies into the river of you-know-what with a plop, disappearing.

That's disgusting.

Unbinding his legs, Mr Nos gets back to his feet, and we carry on.

But we're soon confronted by another goblin. This time with a two-sided axe.

'Whats do we haves here?' it squeaks. 'Dinners for tonights me thinks?'

Not if I can do anything about it. And when did goblins eat witches and wizards?

Mr Nos doesn't even get out, 'I'll handle this,' when me and the others cast spells again.

I can't speak for anyone else but I'm really nervous right now. If I see a menacing goblin coming at me with a two-sided axe, I'm casting a spell. Totally normal reaction, right? You can't blame me. Anyone else would do the same.

And yay, this time the goblin gets hit by one of our spells.

I'm sure it's mine because the goblin starts growing and growing, its shrieks of shock turning to deep barks. It grows so big it gets wedged in the sewer.

'Turns me back,' the goblin grumbles. 'I's don't wants to be a giant. I likes being sma --'

'What are you guys doing?' Mr Nos bellows at us.

Uh, oh. He's been hit by one of our spells again and is sporting a nasty rash on his face.

Seriously, it's bad. Gnarly. Gross. Hideous. He's unrecognizable. It's like he's been sprayed with hag toe-jam or something.

But with a flick of his wand, he fixes it.

'The next one,' Mr Nos says, 'to cast another spell, I'll turn you into basilisk brains, okay?'

'But --' starts Peni.

'No buts. That's final. Okay? I want to come out of this alive with every limb still intact.'

I nod like everyone else.

With the enlarged goblin blocking our way, we can't carry on down the sewer. But there's a ladder nearby.

We climb up and are soon standing on a quiet street in the city.

Well, not for long.