chapter twenty-four – who's crying now?

January 1st, 1986

"I didn't know your brother had this much stuff." Sofia scrunched her face as she taped up another box and scribbled her son's name onto it.

"He liked to collect things..." Her daughter trailed as she sifted through his crate of cassette tapes and stack of vinyls. Mateo did have a knack for giving everything he owned sentimental value. Even if it was a 'cool' rock he found whilst walking from school or a newspaper clipping he thought was interesting – he kept it all and had a backstory for many items in his possession. There were many of Irene's gifted paintings that he still kept, after all the years, hidden away from the world in dark corners. Finding them felt like a blow to the chest; stealing away any air of confidence she thought she had when first walking into the room. 

After a lengthy discussion over cold coffee and cake, the two decided it was finally time to clean out his room.

What a better way to spend his birthday than going through his things and recollecting better times?

They both needed it after the rather melancholic Christmas they endured. The Munson's showed and so did some of the kids to drop off Irene something special and bring the two some warmth, but it just wasn't the same without him. Nothing would be the same without their third member; without a son...a brother. The winter was kicking the Vasquez womens asses and neither of them wanted to admit it, but they were both falling into a rapid sinkhole of seasonal depression and the grief that momentarily alluded them.

They were going to try though; they owed it to Mateo. Both of them knew he wouldn't have wanted them to be sad, despite his begrudging attitude during the latter half of his young adult life. He loved his mother and sister and even though he hadn't said it in a while, he wanted them to be happy. Of course, he grew selfish and let unforeseen circumstances turn him sour but deep down in the chest of his heart there burned an adoration and need to protect the two. Before things changed he used to be an extremely colorful child, so full of wonder and a zest for life that was unmatched. They wanted so desperately to mimic those days.

His favorite music played throughout the home as the blinds were drawn back to let the spring light shine against the cream walls. The two got to work shortly after, separating the things they wanted to keep or donate. It was really hard, especially when deeply sentimental objects were found like lunch notes his mother wrote him during elementary school or ticket stubs from the few baseball games his father took him to – simple things that showcased who Mateo was at his core. 

Then her mother found something that tore at her daughter's chest, sending goosebumps all the way down her arms. An immense wave of melancholy bloomed inside of Irene. "Oh my gosh! Look at what I found, I can't believe he kept these..." Sofia beamed as she pulled out two notebooks from his small bookshelf and handed them to Irene. One was a bright yellow and littered with CareBear and sparkly stickers and the other was a dark green with a drawing of a lone sword and a dragon done in black ink – childlike but impressive nonetheless.

They were campaign journals from when the two would play Dungeons and Dragons with their cousins. Mateo practically begged his sister to join their party and it took a lot of convincing for her to even think about the plea. Not only was she eight and had no clue how to play the game, but she was also the odd one out with her cousins; the only girl and the youngest among the group. Her brother made sure she was always included in their endeavors but she always felt like the outlier; the baby of the group.

When the trio first found out about DnD - thanks to the oldest, Benjamin, who heard about it from other teens in his class - they tried to put together a small party of their own to play. Quickly the boys realized they had very few friends and the ones they did have couldn't play the game because of its 'association with the devil.' So like the smart kid he was, Mateo figured if he taught Irene she could join them and it'd be a fun experience.

"Oh come on, it could be fun!" He pleaded as the two walked side by side. Her silence was killing him; apparently there was a small "scuffle" that occurred on the blacktop during recess and caused her to completely retreat within herself for the rest of the day. As they stepped on the bus he tried sparking up a small conversation about his idea and at first she seemed intrigued, until the bus grew rowdy and two girls sitting in front of them made their distasteful gossip about her very noticeable.

She tugged at one of her curls and then at her earring before he grabbed her hand, bringing her attention toward him.

She huffed as she looked up at her older brother, "I don't even know how to play, Teo. And besides, tengo ocho y no soy tan lista." There was a small hint of defeat in her voice as they rounded the corner and could see their house at the center of their cul de sac. She pulled her hand away from his and walked ahead of him. He figured the previous events of the day had to be eating away at her. 

She heard him jog after her before his shoulder bumped with hers, "That's not true – whoever has you thinking like that is crazy. My sister is the smartest person in the world." He beamed and the pride that radiated off of him in layers was infectious. She gave him a lazy smile and shrugged. They stopped in front of their house and his hands grabbed her shoulders giving her a gentle shake.

"Look, even if you get lost, I can help you...so can Benjamin and Hector." He reasoned with her and raised his brows as if to coax her into agreeing. If she declined he'd be upset but eventually would stop pestering her. He just wanted to extend the olive branch of inclusion...and they really needed a fourth member of their party.

"I've already thought of your name; Rena the Righteous." His hands extended outward as if he were gesturing toward a banner, "Someone who follows the rules but can break them if it means doing what's right." He gushed as he squeezed her shoulders again. Irene thought he sounded like a grown up with all of his sophisticated and complex words. He noticed the way her eyes grew and could see, so clearly, the lights turn back on inside of her.

"Like Wonder Woman?" She spoke in an excited yet hushed town – as if it were a secret that she was just like the superhero she idolized.

Mateo couldn't help but smile, "Yeah, just like Wonder Woman." 

After that she spent the rest of the year playing with her brother and cousins in their basement and enjoying the small world of fantasy that she traveled into every time they came over. Even after they moved she continued to play with her brother whenever they had the time. Her interest in the game faded over time whilst her brothers didn't, so she gave him her campaign notebook for safekeeping in case her spark came back. She didn't think he would hold onto it for so long – especially after all the fights and distance that tore between them.

She shared the secret with Will once when he visited her at Scoops and, of course, he tried convincing her to play again, but she just couldn't bring herself to ask her brother about it. As she skimmed through the notebooks everything inside of her crumbled; an unexplainable sense of dread settled at the bottom of her stomach. She wished to have at least one more conversation with her brother about it – watch his face light up as he explained all the new details he seemed to have added.

The new stats and descriptions for their characters were a clear indication that he kept coming back to the books. The thought of her brother sitting alone, wishing to play and act like kids again made her feel awful. He'd even glued old drawings she did of their character's next to their descriptions for added effect.

The books read:

Rena the Righteous: Level 8, Lawful Good, Half-Elf Wizard. Cons: Stubborn, annoying, follows most rules but is terrible at sticking to the plan. Pros: Knows how to pack a mean punch, talkative (in a good way), will give you the clothes on her back/loyal, and is extremely intelligent.

Sir SmellsAlot: Level 14, Chaotic Neutral, Human Fighter. Cons: Doesn't like rules, impulsive, and holds too many grudges to count. Pros: dashingly handsome, skilled in combat, and knows how to fly under the radar/go unnoticed. 

She sniffled as she skimmed some of the oneshot ideas he'd jotted down. Her eyes drifted upward to meet her mothers empathetic gaze, "How about we take a break? I'll make some lemonade and pb and j sandwiches. Sound good?" She asked softly, squeezing her daughters' shoulder. Irene nodded, giving her mother a wobbly smile.

She then retreated into her room with the notebooks so she could thoroughly read each page. Halfway through old session notes she heard a confident knock at the door and then the muffled sound of her mother arguing with whoever it was on the other end. Salespeople came to their door often and while they were always polite, some of them just didn't take no for an answer and today was not the day to pester the two Vasquez women about Mary Kay skincare or overpriced vacuums.

After thirty minutes had gone by, the two sat on the couch in the living room, feet propped up on the coffee table, and ate their sandwiches whilst drinking their tart lemonade as they watched 'The Karate Kid.' 

 Irene tucked her legs underneath her criss-cross style and lost herself to her thoughts as she absently watched Daniel learn how to 'wax on' and 'wax off.' She heard sniffling coming from beside her and looked over at her mother who was dabbing at her eyes with a napkin. She inched closer and placed her head on her shoulder without saying a word and grabbed her hand to give it a light squeeze.

She could only imagine the inner turmoil her mother had been facing for the past few months and it didn't help that she was so stuck in her isolation that she couldn't help pull her mother out of that dark cave. There were many nights where the guilt of summer and her mothers' grief ate away at her.

She watched her mothers eyes grow heavy with exhaustion as her head laid on her lap. There was a gnawing sensation that burned in her heart. She vowed there on the couch to protect her mothers' peace and be the light that scared away the shadows – she had to be, all they had was each other. Her mother needed her more than ever and even though she'd never say it Irene knew.

As her own eyes began to droop, there was another knock at the door. It was softer, almost as if the person on the other end was hesitant about the action. Her eyes instantly darted downward at her lap toward her sleepy mom who didn't even flinch at the sound.

The stranger knocked again and this time it was with more vigor and force.

With a sigh she stealthily moved her mothers head onto a pillow and trudged toward the sound, having an inkling of an idea of who was on the other side.

She swung the door open, muttering under breath a plethora of quick witted insults she was about to throw at the badgering salesman. However, when her gaze met those signature soft doe eyes that made her weak in the knees her features relaxed. She practically melted into the floor at the sight of a bouquet of bright flowers held loosely to his chest.

Her body leaned against the doorframe, allowing the boy across from her to really drink in the image. In his mind, Eddie thought she looked adorable in a shirt far too big for her (One of Mateo's Smiths shirts) and a pair of paint-ridden jeans, cuffed at the bottom. Her hair was pulled back into a braid and small curls framed her face. Irene, however, bet money she looked exhausted and terrible.

"Hi." She breathed, cheeks flushed as she gave him a small smile.

"Bad time?" Eddie asked and she shook her head before casting her eyes down at the flowers again. He caught on and held them toward her.

"I remember you said it was your brothers birthday today so I-uh-I was at the store and saw them and I just-I thought—"

She engulfed him in a bone-crushing hug; the kind that spoke gratitude and adoration into the quiet atmosphere. He was thankful his arms instantly opened so the flowers wouldn't get squished between them. Oddly enough, the gesture was unlike Irene. She liked to touch him – to link arms on their way to class or "accidentally" fall asleep on him when he stayed over – but hugs between them were rare. Initiating them was something she had trouble doing and Eddie took notice fairly quickly into their friendship – there were just far too many things that flustered her when it came to him. How he hadn't noticed her feelings for him sooner was a question he still had yet to answer. 

Wherever Irene walked, love followed closely behind. So, you can see why it was hard for him to find any reason that she actually had feelings for him and wasn't just being kind because it was in her nature. But with Eddie, and anyone she had a crush on, it was always different. There were leaps she couldn't bring herself to take – borders she didn't know how to cross. The soft gesture meant so much to her though that she figured the hug was the only way she thought of thanking him. Well, it was either that or kiss him but she buried those thoughts deep inside after their third date when Eddie ran into an old fling who seemed far more experienced than her. Ever since then she hesitated even when causal forms of intimacy were initiated.

A muffled "thank you" vibrated against his chest as he wrapped his arms around her, rubbing soothing circles against her. His heart broke as she trembled in his grasp. A small whimper slipped from her lips and he squeezed her tighter, catching a good sight at her mother knocked out on the couch. She smelled like the punk rock/alternative aisle of Vince's Record parlor, and he could only assume that the shirt she was wearing was actually her brothers.

They stood like that for a while before she finally let go, wiping her face as her hand waved dismissively, "Gosh, sorry I'm such a mess."

"Hey," He cooed with a warm smile, the dimple on his left cheek making an appearance. "S'okay to be messy." Her eyes snapped toward him and she matched his features with a smile of her own - a genuine Irene Vasquez smile. Her hands gently took the bouquet, and her fingers ran over the petals, inhaling their soft fragrance. 

"He would've really liked you." She whispered informatively, eyes all glossy again, "You'd probably annoy the hell out of him but somewhere along the way you'd soften that cold exterior of his." There was a small sliver of light that peaked through the cracks against her walls. She'd been building them back up over the past couple of weeks but finally Eddie could see some part of the girl he met still shining underneath all her armor.

He rocked back and forth on the balls of his feet, hands shoved deeply into his back pockets, "He seemed like a cool dude."

She looked down at the Azalea's in her mothers yard and then back up toward him, "He was." Her head shook gently and she waved her hand again, her voice barely above a whisper, "Sorry I'm putting a damper on things, aren't I?"

"No." Eddie replied gently and there was a pause between them. The hum of the tv in the living room filled the atmosphere as well as the sounds of a dove's coo in the distance – if it got any more quiet however the interaction would only grow more awkward. Irene was thankful there was some kind of sound that hung between them – she didn't really know what to say.

She was going to start retreating again and the window of opportunity was closing.

Eddie sighed, "I–um–M–my boss asked if I could pick up an extra shift today so I can't stay, but I really wanted to come and give you the flowers and then I bumped into Sam and–"

"Speak his name and trouble shall appear." A voice sang in the distance, causing Irene's face to further brighten as she picked her head up.

"Sam." She breathed and her eyes welled with tears once more.

"Hey, hermit." He cooed and stepped closer so he could give her a hug. "Your mom called, said you guys were cleaning out your brother's room and needed help taking some donation boxes to Goodwill. Found this goon perusing the aisles of Melvald's and asked if I could hitch a ride." His head motioned behind him, causing a light chuckle to fall from Irene's lips.

He took the flowers from her before she moved her body to the side so he could step in and just as he did, her mother stirred awake and smiled sleepily at his presence. He closed the door behind him to give the two some privacy (even though he was totally going to eavesdrop on the other side).

Irene turned to Eddie and let out a breath through her nostrils, a smile rested comfortably against her lips, "Thank you." She whispered and her tone was warm and kind. She looked softly into his eyes. His lips parted as if he wanted to say something but the words immediately escaped him.

There was something there, it had been growing for a while. Both, however, were far too terrified to do anything about it. Yes, they'd gone on three dates and we're starting to kind of figure out where they stood with each other but there were so many gray areas; specifically with Irene. Eddie felt like there was still a lot she was holding back from him and while he never forced her into conversation about it, there were many things he wished he knew more about.

He cleared his throat, "Of course. I'll see ya." He said, turning to escape to his van before Irene could even get a word out. She furrowed her brows and watched him drive off, shaking the confusion away as she stepped back inside the house and was greeted with the knowing gaze of Sam. Thankfully, her mother seemed to have fallen back asleep.

"Please don't. If it's not Robin, it's Dustin and if it's not Dustin it's Steve and honestly Sam, I really don't feel like playing twenty-one questions on my brothers' birthday." She sighed, rubbing her face.

He held his hands up in surrender, "I didn't say anything. I wanted to say that there's clearly some unspoken tension there but I didn't because I'm a good friend." He gave her a bright smile to which she rolled her eyes and brushed past him toward Mateo's room.

"Are you really?" She questioned playfully, ignoring his initial comment, but her voice faded out as she left him in the living room.

She hadn't noticed how empty her brother's room now looked; she was so focused on making sure she was keeping the right things that she didn't take the time to really look up at the empty walls, bare mattress, and lonely desk that once sat in a colorful corner. Sam's footsteps drew near and she forced a smile to the surface, surprising him with how well she seemed to be taking the day.

"I forgot to mention, there's cake in the fridge. My mom and I made it last night."

Sam shook his head, "And here I was, thinking this day couldn't get any better."

— — — 

Hawkins cemetery was quiet. Not in a haunting way but one that made you heave a sigh and relax in the stillness. It was the one place that had the eerie ability to remind someone of their humanity. It reminded Irene that she wasn't immortal and she was existing on borrowed time. She liked reading the small memoirs on the headstones, looking into the lives of those that had passed on – who they were before they met their fate.

Mateo's read: In Loving Memory of Mateo Javier Vasquez – A Son, Brother, and Hero. Until We Meet Again...

She laid down a quilt and kneeled on it, replacing the flowers she'd brought him last month with the one's Eddie gifted her. Across the cemetery Sam was visiting his mom and a few feet away from him was her mother, looking at the plethora of headstones – allowing her daughter to have her moment with her brother.

She sat and looked at the headstone, "I don't get how I'm just supposed to...keep going – how I have to go on living like this is normal. As if watching you take your last breaths after that thing ripped right into–" Her breath hitched and she stopped, squeezing her eyes shut as tears threatened to creep down her cheeks.

She opened her eyes again, "I–um–I found our old campaign notebooks in your room...look at you, living up to the SmellsAlot name; kicking ass and saving lives." She chuckled dryly, before a deep frown overcame her features, "Why did you always have to be the hero?" She questioned bitterly, eyes welling with tears as she shook her head. She looked up and drew her eyebrows together when she couldn't see anyone – as if Sam and her mom disappeared off the face of the earth completely. The sky grew ominously dark, making it look like it was about to rain.

A loud sloshing sound made a shiver run down her spine. She stood quickly knowing all too well who it was coming from. Goosebumps rose to the surface of her skin as a cacophony of clicking noises filled her ears. The moment she turned her blood ran cold and it felt as if her feet were glued to the floor. The Mind Flayer towered over her, swallowing her frame in its shadow. It roared, barring its sharp-boney teeth at her and finally she took a few steps back.

It crept toward her and she tripped on the picnic basket near her, falling into a hole–no–a grave. She looked over to her side and there lay her corpse, frozen, her skin awfully blue and grotesque. She screamed and just above her roared the Mindflayer again, one of its tentacles slithered down the opening. Her hands instantly rose to protect her just as it was about to strike.

And then, just like that, the atmosphere grew eerily silent. Her ears throbbed as her heart pounded against her chest. She slowly opened her eyes and noticed she was still sitting in front of her brother's headstone, Sam and her mother still standing off in the distance, now talking to each other as they looked at the trees. Her palms were sweaty as they slowly let go of the quilt. She gulped and stood before jogging over to the two, trying to erase the image that burned behind her eyelids.

Perhaps, it was just a dream. 

February 10th, 1986

She's lying in the sun and she looks beautiful, ethereal, otherworldly. She looks like she belongs on a postcard that says something like 'Come down to Lover's Lake! You won't even notice how disgusting it is when you're with the person you love.'

Eddie chuckled to himself and he caught her eye as she squinted at him underneath the sun. God, she looked so beautiful.

"What's going on in that head of yours, Munson?" She questioned, tugging at his jeans as she placed her straw hat back on and tucked her feet underneath her. Her head tilted to the side like a puppy, looking at him with such sheer innocence and something warm. He was thankful for the sun because he could disguise his bashful strawberry stricken cheeks as heat exposure. He held his hand up to shield his eyes, as if it were the sun that was blinding him with its radiance, and gave her a smug grin.

"Just wondering when I'll get to see this picture you've been taking ages to sketch." He quipped and she froze – it was her turn to blush underneath the weight of his gaze.

She dragged him (well technically coerced him into taking her) to the lake because it was as she stated, 'such a beautiful day that needed to be captured.' They set up in a partially shaded, partially directly under the sun, spot on the dock and as she drew Eddie pretended to be taking a nap. Music and the water whispering against the shore, played as their background noise.

Halfway through sketching the line of trees that sheltered the lake and the gigantic boulders that sat at their trunks, she found herself looking down toward Eddie. First it was just her admiring the tattoos that littered his arm in an erratic array and then she began studying his face and how his curls delicately framed it without any effort. And of course, as an artist does when they find a more fascinating muse, she began to draw him.

Things between the two had been...difficult...lately and to be able to just enjoy each other's company and be tender was something they needed.

Eddie nudged her with his knee and she pulled herself out of her thoughts, looking over at him with widened eyes. He gave her another sly smile and sat up, "Come on Kahlo I wanna see what you drew." The comment made her face heat up even more, but she'd be damned if she let him see that he was getting to her. 

She snorted, coming back to herself, and his smile only grew, "Kahlo? Sure, in my dreams. Flattery's not gonna work with me, Ed." He quirked his eyebrow and it caused her stomach to do somersaults; there was a childlike giddiness that bloomed in her chest.

His hands reached for the book and she gasped playfully, holding it away from him. He suppressed the giggle that crept up his throat and reached again to only be met with her wide eyes as she placed the book underneath her.

A wave of warmth seeped through every crevice of her body as she looked back at him daringly. He raised both brows as if to silently question whether she really wanted to get into it with him. Then her body erupted in a flurry of synapses as electricity moved through her – his hands tickled at her sides menacingly.

She bellowed his name and for him to stop between her infectious laughter. Just as he thought he could grab the notebook when her body writhed to the side, she snatched it and wobbled to her feet.

It caught him off guard and he watched as she raced barefoot down the dock, lilac skirt swaying at her ankles as her shirt hiked up at the sides – her tan skin glowing underneath the sun. She was catching her breath, back turned toward him as she looked at the lake, and he just had to take in the sight; the moment wouldn't last forever, no matter how badly he wanted it to. So, he tucked it near his heart beside the memories and moments most sacred to his soul and then stood to chase after her like a couple of children.

She yelped when he wrapped his arms around her – despite hearing the thump of his feet. He spun her and the book flew out of her hands and, thankfully, landed on the wood. The two shared looks before Eddie placed her down and scrambled toward it. She ran to grab him and tripped on an opening in between the planks and pushed into him instead, sending the both of them flying to the floor beside their things.

Their giggles were colorful and loud as they laid beside each other. Despite the dull ache from the fall, they were far too drunk on their joy to even bother groaning.

Once their laughter slowly died down, Eddie propped his head up with his arm and looked at her. She sheepishly met his gaze and tried to hide her rosy cheeks with her hands. With as much bravery as he could muster under the sun's heat and beside the girl he felt himself slowly falling for, he reached over to tuck her hair behind her ear and let his hand gently trace down her cheek. 

She was the epitome of beauty.

Her face fell softly as comfort etched itself in the curl of her brow. He heard the slight hitch of her breath as he cupped her jaw – his clunky rings cooling her warm skin. She swore the two of them were slowly leaning toward each other. The world around them grew silent as they looked at one another, both shyly stealing quick glances at each other's lips.

As if on cue, a dog barked in the distance and then came running down toward the shore – splashing in the water as a child giggled after it. Why a family brought their child to a lake that was notorious for teenage hookups was unbeknownst to either of the two. Irene quickly pulled away, sitting up and collecting herself as she reached for her sketchbook. As she went to shove it inside her backpack her hand grazed against the tarot deck nestled at the bottom and without thinking she took it out.

"Hey," she nudged Eddie with her foot. He was lying down, eyes closed, as he tried to desperately collect himself and put together what the hell just happened. How could she just move on from what happened that fast? 

The sound of her voice made him look over at her, from how he was laying, she was upside down, "Want me to read your future?" She questioned playfully, holding up her cards.

He squinted at her, the clouds moving away from the sun and shining directly onto his face, "You're not gonna tell me I'm gonna die right?" He lazily sat up and raised an eyebrow at her. He liked that she was into spirituality and many macabre things – it was very 'metal' of her, as he would often say. 

"No," She laughed softly. "The tarot is just an outline for a foreseeable future; a prediction of what could possibly happen should you follow said outline." She explained as her hands shuffled the cards. He shifted to sit across from her and looked at her with adolescent curiosity.

They sat in a comfortable stillness, the tree's blew softly in the wind, water lapped against the rocky shore and even though the family had lingered around they were far from loud. Irene focused on the cards in her hand. Her brows furrowed and face became stoic as she quietly called upon her ancestors to guide her. Eddie watched, entranced by how ethereal she looked yet again.

She stopped, picking the card from the top of the deck before laying it in front of him. Their gazes met and she smiled bashfully – a tinge of embarrassment kissed her cheeks but if he looked hard enough, he could see a glimmer of pride in her smile too.

"This represents your past." She pointed at the Knight of Swords card turned upside down and he looked at it with utmost interest.

"So, this makes sense. You were once brimming with all this energy and throwing yourself into your music and studies — which wasn't a bad thing at all actually — but you needed to hit the brakes. When you finally did you spun out and hit this low and kind of lost direction for a while. Your grades were declining, you seemed less enthusiastic at lunch, and your performances at The Hideout just didn't have the same sound as they used to." She explained and his eyes went wide as he let out a low whistle.

"Jesus, Rena. Didn't know you'd lay the truth down like that." He quipped and she rolled her eyes playfully before shuffling the cards again. He watched as she stopped and pulled a card sticking out from the middle of the deck.

"This is your present."

He looked down at the card, "The Fool? You trying to tell me something, sunshine?" She let out a quiet laugh, and casted her gaze down as she shook her head. The nickname never failed to cause her palms to sweat and turn the tips of her ears red.

"The Fool is the first card in the Major Arcana and represents beginnings — embarking on a new journey. You are about to step into something new...it's quite an exciting card," She marveled and glanced up to catch him just staring at her with a bright smile. "What?" She questioned shyly.

He cleared his throat and shook his head, "You just," His eyes searched the lake before they slowly made their way back toward her. "You look beautiful. I've never seen someone so in tune with the world as you." 

Irene gulped, and for the second time that day she felt her nerves getting the better of her. She looked beautiful? She wanted to chuckle because if anything he was the one that glowed against the backdrop of the glistening lake. He was the one that was mystifying and altogether had to have been crafted by something holy and divine. Sure, he had his scruffy moments and his hair was in a constant state of frizz but that's what made him so special – the fact that he was so unabashedly himself and wore his colors with confidence.

All she could muster up was a meek, 'thank you,' before returning to her cards. She shuffled them one last time and he noticed how she hesitated as she grabbed at the bottom of the deck.

"This is your future," she explained and her fingers turned the card around and something sinister echoed in every part of her body. She swallowed thickly, her fingers still hovering over the card as stills of her friends in agony flooded her mind. The tick and chime of a clock boomed in her ears causing her chest to heave with dread. She felt like she had back in January...when she went to visit her brother.

The familiar thick feeling of warm blood trickled down her nose.

The Tower stared back at her, almost tauntingly, with a vengeance.

Eddie leaned forward grabbing her shoulder, "Jesus Christ—Your nose—What is it? What's wrong?" His eyes searched her frantically, moving her hair from her face as he grabbed it to gently examine the crimson dripping down her lips. She looked like she was sick; her face visibly paled as a sheen layer of sweat covered her forehead.

He brought the bandana from his back pocket up to her nose and wiped away the blood. "Hey," He called again, holding the sides of her face a little firmer, shaking her from her trance-like state.

She looked up at him and shook her head, snapping out of the fog that settled behind her eyes, "Ed," she breathed, "Sorry. I just-I-" Her voice was barely above a whisper as tears pooled in her eyes.

"It's okay." Eddie whispered looking at her in pure concern. She leaned into him and he wrapped his arms around her, muffling the sound of her crying. She clung to him, gripping his shirt until the whites of her knuckles showed. "You're okay," He lulled as he stroked her hair and softly rocked their bodies back and forth.

They packed up shortly after and Eddie led her back to his van, one hand cupping her elbow as the other hovered behind her. He was being so delicate with her – too delicate. Sour feelings swirled in the depths of her as terror sat between her ribcage.

She couldn't let him get mixed up in whatever was burrowing within Hawkins' depths – she'd made that call over the summer and refused to go back on her word. Eddie couldn't get caught in the crossfire; she'd die before losing someone else – she was willing to make that sacrifice. However, she knew she wouldn't have to with him because this was it; this was the curtain call. 

The car was quiet as they stopped in front of Irene's house. The entire ride was spent in silence; Eddie gnawed at the inside of his cheek and she tugged at her curls, still reeling over the fragments that tore at her retina's on the creaky dock.

Eddie put the car in park and cleared his throat, turning in his seat to look at her. She didn't meet his eyes and it made his chest tighten.

"Can we talk about it?" He whispered.

She fiddled with her fingers as she gave him a half shrug, "I get bloody noses from heat exhaustion. It's nothing really." She couldn't tell where the truth stopped and the lies began – the words that fell from her lips were practically embedded in her brain's code.

"You seemed pretty spooked back there. Are you sure you're–"

"I said it's nothing, Eddie." She snapped exasperatedly, finally looking up to meet his tired gaze. Dusk had fallen over the town and both of them were clearly exhausted.

His features turned cold, almost as if someone had blown out the candle lit against his face – whatever was warm and inviting had drifted away with the rest of the smoke that rose from his burnt wick. "Well I'm sorry. You just–you're acting different." He internally cringed at his choice of words, they were harsh but true. He was glad they came out sooner rather than later; there was something wrong and he couldn't keep ignoring it anymore.

"What's that supposed to mean?" She questioned distastefully, staring at him in both pain and anger as she hugged her chest.

"Something happened back there, Irene. You looked like you'd just seen a corpse or something and now I can feel you pulling away and it's like you won't even tell me why. I just want you to talk to me about it; to let me in. You're my best friend–I thought we got past hiding shit from each other." Eddie argued, eyes searching hers in desperation. He'd never seen her retreat this deep inside of herself.

Her body turned away from him again as she rolled her eyes, whispering harshly, "You just wouldn't get it." She swallowed down the growing lump in her throat.

Eddie scoffed; she was being stubborn and the both of them knew it. "Oh, I wouldn't? That's such bullshit and you know it. I've shared things with you that I've never even told my buddies I've known for years–not even my own goddamn uncle."

"That's not fair." She turned, pointing an accusatory finger at him.

"What? The fact that I'm being open and you're not? You're right, that's not fair." The thought had been eating away at him for weeks and it felt like a weight had been lifted from his chest when it finally came out.

"You're an asshole." She scoffed bitterly.

"And you're selfish, but you don't see me complaining. You know, you're not the only one that gets to go through things, Irene. The goddamn world doesn't revolve solely around you." He shook his head and averted his glossy eyes from her. His voice was hoarse and scratchy, but in her bubbling fears and anger Irene could hardly tell.

"Fuck you." She spat with sheer frustration and undertones of malice. She never raised her voice or even cursed at Eddie, but her vision was tainted with layers of red; she didn't even think twice about the words that spilled like wine from her lips. He'd pushed too hard. They both knew what they had said was awful – that their words had pierced each other's skin, but both were also far too entangled in their pride to apologize.

She opened the door and trudged out of the car. When she reached the inside of her home she slammed her front door shut and collapsed onto the couch as a slew of emotions spilled out of her, streaming down her cheeks in hot tears.

AUTHORS NOTE!

holy crap, I can't believe I actually did it! this is going to be the last of the filler chapters, so next chapter is going to be the first episode of season four....it's a doozy y'all. but wow! were you guys expecting that? it was something I toyed with for a whileeeee. I always wanted irene to read eddie's cards but the twist it took was something I was very skeptical about at first - however I think it just goes to show how terrified irene is to bring him into the chaos - she thinks by pushing him away she's doing him a favor...but we all know how that's gonna go...

nonetheless, how'd we like this chapter?

I think it's by far one of my favorite filler chapters and I'm really glad I went back and polished it — im a lot happier with this outcome than the last. it's also long as hell which I'm not too mad about ahahah. ALSO! don't know if we've celebrated yet but this book hit 4k!!! thank you to those of you who give this book the time of day and comment and vote because it makes me feel really motivated and helps me know that you like what i'm writing.

now that you've got an idea as to how season four will start how do you think eddie and irene will settle their lover's quarrel? what do you think will happen when fate and inter-dimensional villains come into play??? please let me know your thoughts and theories for season four!

alright friends, until next time!