C H A P T E R   43 :   B R I N G   M E   B A CK

"How can you see into my eyes like open doors?
Leading you down, into my core
Where I've become so numb, without a soul
My spirit's sleeping somewhere cold
Until you find it there and lead it back home

Now that I know what I'm without
You can't just leave me
Breathe into me and make me real
Bring me to life

I've been living a lie, there's nothing inside"

Logan's POV

I didn't know what took over me, but next thing I knew, I had slain all the soldiers in the hallway before the kids had time to arrive and realize what was happening.

"Jesus," Spider-Man, with his quick mouth, was the first to react. "When did this rescuing mission become the set of a bad horror movie?"

"I don't have to give you any explanations." I snapped, my claws still throbbing even though they had nothing else to slash. "If you don't agree with my working methods, you're free to go."

"No, it's just... well, people aren't kidding when they say what Wolverine does best isn't very nice."

"Logan, was this really necessary?" Bianca said just above a whisper, looking down at the mutilated corpses with her face turning as green as her hair. "We weren't in real danger."

"The entire base is looking for Felicia, and they won't rest until they find her. And I can assure you, they will be the ones not playing nice if they capture her. Do you really think, in your right minds, that I'll allow that?"

"Logan, we know how important she is to you, but—"

"No, you don't." I cut Bobby off. "Now let's go. We need to find her before they do, or this whole building is going to turn into a slaughterhouse."

"Goddammit, Logan," Lewis said, taking a defiant step towards me, and I could have sworn I'd seen real flames dancing in his eyes, "if you really go this far for her, don't you think she should know?"

I crossed my arms over my chest, my ears still attentive at any possible newcomers. I knew that, unlike the others, if Lewis wanted, he'd confront my authority; all of him was made of riots. In a revolution he'd be the kind of person that doesn't stand with either side. I bet he would be an anarchist even against anarchy.

"What are you talking about?"

"Do I really need to spell it out?" He tilted his head to the side, and I didn't like how his eyes seemed to know me better than me. I didn't know him, he didn't know me. And yet we both did. Through her. "Just don't let all this blood be for nothing. Don't let this mission go to waste. After it's over, do something with it. Don't go back to your shell and don't let her go back to hers. Just let her see. Let yourself see. Why are you both afraid to feel what you already feel?"

I kept quiet, uncapable of reacting. This guy had trapped me in my own trap. I don't want to feel because that's all I do, because I can't stop. And the things we can't stop... we fear. Like time. Or death. Or me.

"Ok, maybe you should leave the Dr. Phil talk for another time, 'cause there's more of them coming!" Arachnid warned, and the next second, a battalion of soldiers came in from behind us, Bobby being the first one to react and shooting two jets of ice out of his hands to stop the bullets.

I let my claws come out once again and growled. Time for round three.

***

Felicia's POV

At the same time

This time, they didn't make me black out, because that's how the doctor operated. He wanted to see me going through the entire process in agony, see the shift in my eyes once he finally had me.

While I stood flawlessly unflappable on the outside as they prepared me for the procedure, like a wax statue in a museum of horrors, my mind was screaming mayday, mayday, mayday and sending out all the SOS in the world. Mayday came from M'aider, which was French for 'help me', and people liked to think SOS stood for Save our Souls. But I knew once this started, there would be no soul left in me to save.

I tried to find my power, but it was missing in action. I thought about James, hoping he would miraculously wake up, free himself and come for me. I thought about Logan, wondering what he was doing right now. Probably having lunch in his usual seat at the canteen, on a corner away from others. It hurt, the thought of never seeing him again. It hurt more, the possibility that if I did it might not be with the same eyes.

The assistants had ordered me to change, taking away the military uniform, and I thanked James for his idea to hide the pen drive at the janitor's closet in case something like this happened and in hopes we could return there to retrieve it. I was now wearing a pair of old sneakers, grey, certainly unwashed, sweatpants and a shirt more yellow than white due to the usage, making me wonder in how many prisoners it had previously been on. The only good side of it was I had been uncuffed, but with my state so weak, I didn't dare to start a battle I knew I couldn't win.

"Sit down." Dr. Heidrich demanded, pointing down at a reclined chair beneath a frightful machine attached to a bunch of computers and monitors. Before I could even think of doing what he was telling me, I was shoved harshly by two guards onto it, almost failing the spot completely. "Arms on the armrests."

I gave him an irate stare but he wasn't looking at me, instead examining the screens and preparing a dose of injections, and as soon as my skin touched the armrests, restraints made from a metal I wasn't familiar with wrapped tightly around my arms, making me grit my teeth to stop a scream.

If I had to go, I'd go down in silence.

"Mouth open." An unresponsive soldier ordered, and I couldn't help but wonder what had gone so wrong in these men's lives to become this type of person. When I didn't do what he asked, he grabbed my jaw and stretched the skin around my lips, shoving a mouth guard in my mouth so harshly I almost choke.

"It's time, my Felicia." Dr. Jekyll clapped once, bringing the tray of needles closer to me. "Time to be mine."

I felt the nausea climbing up my throat but I forced it back down. This monster was a fanatic, an extremist, and while I was nobody's religion, all I could do now was watch him pray to me. Worship me like I was a firstborn to an entire glorious generation. The heir to his empire of lunacy.

"Don't worry," he said, "it will only hurt as much as it should."

Then he brought the needle to my arm and I flinched and clenched, the sharp tip puncturing my skin and releasing a wave of jolts through my veins so violently I could feel them in the muscles, bones and neurons. All my molecules were hyperactive and suddenly I could feel everything, from the things that I had to the ones I lacked. I could literally feel my synapses on the verge of breakdown, my mind on the verge of becoming someone else's, and there was not a damn thing I could do but to lean back in the chair and let him consume me.

Maybe it really was true, that everyone was meant to become what they feared and hated the most. I tried not to think about how many lives I would take as the venom spread in my body. A part of me was still trying to get to that final bit of hope, to that last stage of survival, as if I could force myself out of this nightmare. Wake up, wake up, WAKE UP!

"Don't fight it!" Heidrich yelled. "You know it's worse."

An abrupt, acute shock, more harrowing than the others, made me jolt in my chair and I knew this was it. I could feel my soul waving goodbye.

"Sir, it's taking longer than expected." I heard an assistant say as he observed one of the monitors.

"Yes, with her it always does." The doctor said between gritted teeth. "We'll have to use the machine."

My heart started bumping even more when I heard the metallic halo above my head rotate and descend towards me, its horrifying arms settling on either side of my head.

"Now this may hurt more than it should, my dear, but that's just punishment for fighting against science." Frankenstein announced, his twisted smile sending me into a realm of dread that made my arms shake and clash against the shackles frantically. It was as if a part of me had finally awakened, but I didn't know which part or how I could use it, all I knew was it was very raw, very primitive, very me. Fight. Fight. Fight.

His grin got bigger, overstretching his lips, and he turned the machine on, his face lighting up like a kid on Christmas. I ripped the mouth guard with my teeth when I felt the metal press against my skull, squeezing my brain so hard I thought it would turn it liquid and some kind of grey drink would pour out of it. This was the worst pain I had ever felt, and well, that had some competition to begin with.

"Almost there, Miss Hardy." Dr. Heidrich hummed, his grey, obsessive eyes the only thing I could see. But even in so much agony I refused to die with that image in my mind, so I closed my eyes and brought him to me, because there was no one else I'd want as my last words, just him, all of him, always him, his light brown eyes, his golden skin and that smell of summer that always made me spring.

"You're mine now, Devil's child." Heidrich said, and when the metal pushed even more against my head, my back arched, my claws rolled out of my nails, tears streamed down my face and his words finally made sense, fight until they break you, and fight harder after that, because being broken doesn't mean it's the end, it doesn't equal defeat, it's just round one and if you're gonna tap out, make sure they don't see, make sure it's worth it, make sure it makes you win.

Damn you, Logan. Your lessons come so deep from pain I can only learn them through it. I can only see your reason when I lose mine.

Then everything happened one step at a time and all at once, someone bursting the door open, my arms ripping off the straps savagely, one of them hitting God's imitator right in the face, making him fall backwards onto the trays and screens, my hands going to my collar and tearing it in half, bullets being shot one after the other, the machine clicking and crackling until it shut down completely, me getting up and tearing the first throat out, and then the next one and the one after.

I looked over at Heidrich to kill him but he was gone, and I didn't even have time to feel mad about it because I had plenty more to choose from, and I killed without even being there, my mind still some place else, far away, not coming to its senses but not needing it either, because my claws were doing the talking now and I wouldn't tell them to shut up.

Since none of the immensity of bullets that were being shot was hitting me, I assumed whoever had arrived wasn't a foe, but I only dared to glance at them once the final body slipped from my hands to the floor.

James was staring at me from across the room, the AK-47 in his arms like the kitten had been the day before, the look in his face so closed and yet so open, a galaxy of emotions setting in his eyes, I'm sorry, are you okay, what happened, are you still you, am I still me, what are we, will you come with me, did they hurt you, I will kill them, don't worry, I already did, just tell me how you are and let's go, all of this in his stare, all of the answers on mine, and after this I'd have to ask Bianca what was the bond like between a Scorpio and a Pisces because certainly this mutual understanding, this degree of intuition didn't come easy or often.

I didn't speak when I ran towards him, or him to me, not even when his arms made their way around my body, enfolding me in a tight hug, you're here, you're you, we're alright.

Then I followed him outside the room and into the hallway, where more soldiers were running towards us because someone had sounded the alarm, and James took a grenade from his pocket, pulled the ring and threw it at them as we ran in the opposite direction, the noise from the explosion rumbling in my spine. Then we were climbing down the stairs and jumping over several steps, and I knew we weren't going up because that's what they would be expecting, and besides we needed the pendrive, and we needed to see if anyone else needed rescuing.

Holding my hand, James took me to the empty janitor's closet, narrowing his eyes because the only beam of light was coming from the hallway, and rummaged through the objects until he found the pendrive and put it on one of his pockets. He still had the uniform on, but the helmet, the mask and most of the weapons were missing.

"My power hasn't come back yet." I blurted out as I tried to regain my breath and myself. "I can feel it now, but it's still dormant."

"It's ok." James assured, taking some strands of hair away from my sweaty face like he had done after removing the bullet from me. "I'm so sorry, Felicia, I shouldn't have let them—"

"Don't. It's their fault, not yours. Honestly, I've lost count of how many times you've saved me by now."

"I'm pretty sure we're tied." A ghost of a smile crossed his face. "How are you feeling?"

"In every possible way, I guess. I'll be fine, but James..." My voice faltered, my bottom lip trembled. "That machine, that pain, did you ever..."

He nodded slowly and solemnly. "I've lost count of that too."

"I'm sorry." I said, not being able to imagine. "I'm sorry."

"It's over now." He concluded. "But knowing how it was, and knowing you'd go through it too, it unlocked something in me. I felt the closest to the Soldier without being the Soldier, while still being me. I've done so much wrong, I couldn't let another be done because of me. So I don't even know how, but I managed to break free from my cell, fight everyone that stood in my way and get to you. I guess the only reason I didn't die was, well, because I couldn't let you either."

He paused, his eyes wandering over my face and stopping on mine, not heavily, not insistently, just there. A lasting presence. And even if it was dark inside, he could see me. But then again, while most people couldn't see me when they looked at me, he saw me even without having to look.

"Why did you do it?" He asked, almost inaudible. "The last thing I heard before they knocked me out on the prison was you saying you'd let them have you. Then when I woke up and saw you weren't there, I realized you had turned yourself in for me. You chose me over you, you decided to suffer so it wouldn't be me. And no one... no one other than Steve had ever sacrificed themselves for me like that."

"I had to do it." I said simply. "You went through it for far too many times."

"It has been so long I thought that part of me was dead." He replied. "The part that can feel and care. But it's not. Because all I do when I'm with you is feel and care."

"James, I..." I shut up, all choked up. I understood now, the soldiers that talked about how important their comrades in war were. Extreme circumstances produced extreme, extraordinary bonds.

"I should have never dragged you into this." He interrupted, his eyes unfocused now, restive. "I should have never presumed we'd be able to take down an entire compound, but unfortunately, I let my anger and loathing towards HYDRA and my need for closure blind me, and you've paid the price. You could have been brainwashed, Felicia. You could have become a second me. Do you know how terminal that is?"

"James, don't." I replied. "It kills me that you can't see, that, yes, the Winter Soldier might have been what I was afraid of becoming, but Bucky? Bucky is someone I aspire to be."

I heard his breath being caught in his throat, the tears behind his eyes. This whole situation was a creepy trip down memory lane for both of us, and yet we were finding something new. Something worth remembering.

"You understand the fulls and empties in me like others never will." He admitted. "So if I lose you now, it'll feel like I'm losing myself all over again."

"You won't." I guaranteed him. "You won't. Heidrich might say whatever he wants, but his sick interest, his liking to me has made him blind. He thinks he knows me, but only because I let him think so. I act according to what he expects. When he said he could break anything, there's one thing he forgot. Breaking someone doesn't mean ending them. It means giving them the power to rebuild themselves. And besides, he can't break someone..."

"That is already broken." James nodded, in that mutual understanding between us that still baffled me. "We can leave this base now. Or we can go after him and make sure your project in HYDRA gets closed for good."

"You know which one I want. But I won't make the choice for you."

"You know I won't let you go alone. This is what we came for. Let's kick his ass." He went for the door but stopped when he saw my expression and shrugged. "What? You're rubbing off on me."

I smiled and for a while we walked in silence, not finding a soul. This level had been evacuated while HYDRA's troops gathered on the top floors, giving us time to recover from the stress of before. We had no clue as to where Heidrich was, but my gut was telling me he was still here. His obsession towards me made him irrational. I knew he wouldn't rest until he completed his plan, so he would stay when he should be running away.

All of a sudden, my ears picked up on faint breaths and rapid heartbeats, clear signs of someone in fear. I extended my hand to the side and made James halt as we turned around the corner.

"What is it?" He asked in a low tone.

"People like us." I answered while my eyes questioned him. He nodded and I led us through the hallways until we stopped in front of a door whose affixed signs went from 'Toxic zone' and 'Radiation' to 'High Voltage' and 'Danger of Death'. There were no guards in sight, probably as to not make it seem like they were keeping and guarding something valuable.

James glanced at me and I nodded. Breathing deeply, he crushed the lock on the door and opened it, his rifle ready. But the sight was so heart-rending he quickly pulled his arms down and looked at me, for the first time since we arrived unsure of what to do. Inside the room there were dozens of prisoners, four or five in each cell, most of them drugged and unconscious, and the few that were actually awake were curled up in fetal position and trembling from fear. I felt every particle inside of me screaming from wrath, empathy and purpose, and I seriously wondered if one could die from feeling too much.

As far as I could see, none of them seemed old enough to even be adults. They were just teenagers. Some of them kids. James and I moved forward at the same time, trying our best not to startle them, like one would do with a scared, mistreated animal found on the streets, or with a bird with broken wings. I expected them to bombard us with questions once we stepped in, but the conscious ones were so dazed and frightened they didn't even dare to look at us for more than a few seconds.

"It's okay." James said, his voice the softest it had been, making many eyes narrow, trying to identify which feeling they were hearing. It crushed me that they didn't know; that they never had, or that it had been so long they'd forgotten. For them kindness no longer existed. "We're here to help."

At first nobody answered, and as much as I wanted to look away from all those inert eyes, from that devastating desert of life, I didn't, hoping to find one last drop of existence in one of them, and then a very feeble voice spoke, crude and dry, as if it was no longer used to being used.

"That's what they've told us too."

Our eyes moved to a young boy hiding in the corner of a cell, his face more dirt than skin, his eyes more dead than alive. When he spoke, he didn't look at us; it was easier facing nightmares when they had no face.

"We're not them." I assured him, desperate to do something. "We were once like you. And we're not going to let them hurt you anymore."

"Why come here if you're free, though?" He argued, his tone more sapient than his body would indicate. "What prove us you're not just one of their mind tricks?"

"I'm sure you've must have heard the explosions today. That was us." James explained. "And there's no guards inside this room or out, or in the entire floor. It's been evacuated so they could direct their troops at us."

"We heard." The little boy nodded. "But we're still here. So either that means they forgot us and left us here or you're here now to take us to them. You're wearing their uniform, after all."

"They left you behind because you're not a priority to them. But you are to us." James said, and there was something beautiful and paternal about him now that made the kid's expression a little softer. "I know there's nothing I can say to make you trust me. You have no reason to believe me. But we're going to help you. Once we have paved the path and know the coast is clear, we're going to come back for you, for all of you. Even if it's the last thing I'll do, I'm going to help you."

"You can trust what he says." I added in a conspiratorial way, as if we were sharing a secret. "His best friend is Captain America."

James gave me a side glance, the sides of his mouth curling up like very time Steve was mentioned. "And hers is Spider-Man."

Like magic, the kid's lifeless eyes rekindled and he slowly nodded. Childhood heroes could really go a long way.

"I'll be waiting for you."

We gave him a firm nod and it was with a heavy heart that we left the room, none of us in the mood to talk. The truth was neither of us knew if we'd make it out of this alive and survive for enough time to save them, but we had to try. Searching for Heidrich, my senses led us to the floor above, and we had a welcoming gift on the stairs waiting for us, a squad of HYDRA's best assets that however had no chance against a freed prisoner of war who also happened to be a master assassin and martial artist, and a very pissed off woman that was getting really sick of their bullshit.

When we got to the top of the stairs, another army stood in our way and without any hesitation, I shoved James aside and jumped, flipping around in the air and striking three guys with a spinning kick. As I landed, I grabbed the machine gun from one of them and started shooting around like the Rich Texan from the Simpsons, just with slightly better aim.

Several bullets passed right before my ear, the shift of air making the back of my skull shudder. I handed James the machine gun when his rifle ran out of bullets and took two guns out of a soldier before pistol whipping him with them and started pulling both triggers at the same time, somehow remembering Logan quoting something he had heard in the army.

Stay low, go fast, kill first, die last. One shot, one kill, no luck, all skill.

When my handguns ran out of bullets, I grasped another machine gun from the ground and heard some bullets hit James on his vest and left arm, because he decided to act all knight in shining armor and got in front of me to protect me, given that I wasn't wearing a vest.

"I'm not a damsel in distress!" I shouted when our backs clashed against the other as we turned around and made our weapons spew bullets faster than politicians spewed promises and lies.

"You're my friend!" He retorted and I threw away the machine gun and picked up more pistols, seeing another group of agents appearing out of nowhere. James ran in front of me, completely unprotected, but this time, I'd be the knight.

"Step aside!" I yelled to him, hunkering down, bending my knees and sliding across the polished floor, my worn sneakers adhering to it smoothly and allowing me to skate it like I was in an ice rink. My feet clashed hard with the shins of the first soldier, making him howl in pain, and he tried to punch me, but I dodged it easily and raised myself up, my claws offering him a necklace of blood.

Two other agents managed to grab me from behind, but I elbowed one of them and dragged him towards the other, my claws scratching every inch of skin, flesh and bone they could find. My clothes, face and hair were painted in red; my body was tattooed by bruises, cuts and scrapes and my sports bra was visible due to my torn shirt. Nothing I'm not used to.

I ran in front of James, his heavy steps echoing on the floor behind me. Jumping and spinning in the air like a trapeze artist to dodge bullets, I used the guns with both hands repeatedly, the powder coloring my hair.

When my acrobatics ended, I came crashing down against one of the guards, my knee colliding against his chest hard and sending him across the hallway and onto the others behind him. Then one of them threw a grenade in my direction and the next second, James had pulled me against him and covered our heads with his flesh arm, using his metal one to send the grenade flying in the direction it had come from, the close explosion deafening me for some seconds before providing me with an annoying buzz in my ears.

"You're ahead in the score now!" I yelled at James, but then someone aimed at his head and I stretched my arm more than humanly possible to get to the bullet and stop it with my claws, the impact of the bullet on the vibranium reverberating all the way to my core, as if there was a pendulum inside me rattling against everything.

"Now we're even!" He shouted back, but instead of replying I yelped in pain when a fist pounded my ribs continuously. I grabbed a handful of the bastard's hair and smashed my knee against his nose, hammering the next two with my own fists, before letting my claws roll and finish the job. The air was getting sticky and stuffy with all the blood and powder and someone kicked me viciously on the back of my knees, sending me sprawling across the floor, my chin hitting the hard surface, my teeth biting my tongue, the acre, metallic taste of blood invading my mouth. I growled and grabbed my attacker's ankle, twisting his leg into a painful position to make him go down.

While doing so, a fistful of soldiers cornered me, and one grabbed me by my hair and forced me to get up to my knees. Kneeling on the floor with a barrel resting against my forehead, I felt like those victims that die early in the movie to send a message.

"Let her go." I heard James' firm voice say from behind the circle of agents, but he only got a round of fiendish sniggers in response.

"Dr. Heidrich will be very pleased with us." One of them said. "When we deliver him his precious little weapon."

Before he could pull the trigger, however, I heard a knife being thrown in the air and sinking deeply into my enemy's wrist, making him drop the gun and whine in pain. All the others moved their weapons from me to James and so I moved my leg up to the most imminent threat and hit him on his arm to make him drop the gun before he had the chance to shoot.

Then James protected me again with his metal arm and my claws described a bow to send away some bullets that were being shot at him.

"Even again." James pointed out, pressing his back against mine as we moved around with HYDRA circling us. A perfect metaphor of their control and siege over us, only this time, we were letting them.

"Our orders are to capture you alive." One of them said, signaling the others not to shoot. "But God knows how much I want to kill you right now. Nothing in you justifies seeing so many of my men dead."

"You should have thought of that before joining the wrong side." I snapped, my mind going back to the prisoners. "I was just a kid when you took me, but did you care about that when you killed my father in front of me or beat me countless of times or ordered me to shoot innocents? And this man right here was helping end a war before you made him start another with himself! Seventy years! For seventy years you abused and tortured him and now you're all stunned and furious when we decide to hit back? I knew HYDRA was bad, but I didn't think you were that stupid. Don't you agree, Winnie?"

As a reply, James pulled his arms back, hooking them under my armpits and lifting me up from the ground and over his head as I fired the guns first towards the agents that had been in front of me and then to the ones who were in front of James. Rotating above him, I landed softly on the ground and wrestled the remaining of the soldiers as my partner did the same.

"See?" I asked James as I hooked a fourth soldier in the neck, making him gasp for air. "Guess that nickname isn't as useless after all!"

James' lips began to form a smile that never came, because then someone grabbed me again and pointed a gun at my head, finger already on the trigger as the other hand clasped tightly around my neck. I mentally cursed. My mind was getting really sick of serving as a gun holder and my neck only wanted a pair of hands on them, and as far as I knew, he was miles away.

"Give yourself up or I swear I'll kill her. I don't care about my orders, my superiors or anything that can happen to me. I want her dead. I want you both dead. But I want her first because I hate a person that can't fucking shut their mouth."

"Don't touch her." James demanded, his Russian accent thicker than ever, but when he made a motion to move, four strong guards held him in his place. The soldier tilted his head to the side, obviously not intimidated. I guess he was too infuriated to feel anything else now.

"Why not? Little soldier got himself a girlfriend? She's something, I'll give you that, but she needs to be taught how to keep her pretty mouth shut."

Oh, please.

"Let. Her. Go." James threatened through gritted teeth, but that only made the soldier squeeze my neck harder. I flinched under his touch but refused to let out any sound. James' brow creased when he saw me in pain and his jaw clenched, the muscles visible. I made a subtle move with my head to tell him I was okay, but he didn't buy it. "Let her go and I'll surrender."

"Hmm... this is interesting." The snide agent continued. "We thought the Winter Soldier was a cold machine with no ability to feel. We thought you didn't have weaknesses, or that at least, they had stayed in the past. Tell me, how's Captain Rogers? Must have been quite a shock, come across him last year, no? Finding out he was your mission?"

"SHUT UP!" James thundered, managing to release himself and taking a step towards the soldier but stopping once he saw his grasp on me hardening and the other guards caught him again. My throat was dry and sore, and my lungs felt like fishes out of the water, struggling for air.

"Oops, did I strike a nerve?" I could hear the asshole grinning. "And I haven't even gotten to the best part yet. I've heard about your time in Siberia. The weather there's so cold a man needs someone to keep their sheets warm, right? I get it, heck, I'd probably do the same. But it must suck not remembering the good times, uh? When you sneaked into the redhead's quarters late at night even though you both knew it was forbidden? Was that what made it so exciting? Or were you really so broken you'd accept any comfort that was offered to you?"

"SHUT THE HELL UP!" James roared again, sending the surrounding agents flying through the air when he violently shook himself out of their hold. My eyes widened once I connected the dots with what James had told me and a name finally came to my mind.

"If I were you, I wouldn't move. I see you got yourself a new weakness now." The soldier said, his hand pulling my head backwards and making James stop with effort, his chest rising up and down heavily. "Didn't you learn from the last time? How does it feel, to know they took her away from you and punished you both in different ways? That while you had your mind wiped and were sent into cryo, she was tortured again and again?"

Ok, that's enough. James and I locked eyes and I saw he realized what I was about to do even before I did, my arm moving backwards with my claws coming up and chopping the guy's arm off before he could even think to pull the trigger, then burying themselves on his leg to make him collapse.

Then James and I started running like crazy, both of us physically and mentally exhausted, the drugs in our system still slowing us down, but I needed to get it off my chest, and if I was going to die today, it might as well be from curiosity.

"So... Natasha Romanoff?"

He looked at me from the corner of his eye and hesitated, but then nodded. So last year he had to face not only one, but two of the ghosts of his past. Fuck this. This man deserved better than this world. But before I could say anything else, a word to console him, a door burst open and someone threw themselves at me like a vicious snake, a needle burying itself so deeply within me I didn't even have time or strengths to scream.

I fell on my knees at the same time those grey orbs entered my orbit, his sweet, sick smile rendering me still.

"Don't be afraid, my dearest, this will not change you, it will reveal the real you. Embrace the darkness, for that's what you are." Dr. Heidrich said and I could feel my mind shifting, like he was the moon changing my tides, I could feel the right and the wrong merging, reversing my moral compass, swerving my life from its direction. I vaguely heard James shout after me and I only had time to turn around and face him so that the last thing I'd see before destroying myself was those steel-blue eyes and nobody else's.

"Please, James." The pain from fighting against myself made me fall to the side, a whimper leaving my lips, my mind drifting off, but still I looked up at him and forced the words to come out of my mouth. "Bring me back."

"Without a thought, without a voice, without a soul
Don't let me die here
There must be something more
Bring me to life

(Wake me up) Wake me up inside
(I can't wake up) Wake me up inside
(Save me) Call my name and save me from the dark
(Wake me up) Bid my blood to run
(I can't wake up) Before I come undone
(Save me) Save me from the nothing I've become"

A/N: Song is "Bring Me To Life" by Evanescence, which is one of the most beautiful songs I've ever heard <3