Chapter 19
Diana
I could hear the sound my heels were making clearly. That's how quiet the place became when I entered the office after my mini vacation. There were no hushed whispers, just silent stares as I made my way to my table. I was halfway there when my secretary Megan saw me. She stood up slowly and as if watching opera for the first time, she started clapping her hands slowly.
It started with just her but then she was joined by the people on the far end of the room. It felt like incoming rain – it started quietly. Next thing I knew, almost everyone was clapping. I didn't know how I felt about the reaction I received but I was more than welcome to accept the applause. I shook my head, laughing. Before I entered my office, I looked at everyone and cleared my throat.
"Let's get things done today."
I received a loud 'Yes, ma'am!' as they sat back down.
"You look... different." Megan followed me inside my office, placing a cup of coffee on my table.
I shrugged, giving her a cheeky grin. "It must be the hair."
"There's that," she pointed out. "You look like you don't have a dark cloud following you around anymore."
Chuckling, I took her notebook with all the appointments I had for the day. "What can I say? Sky's as clear as my hair."
We went through half the day like usual, with some compliments here and there. It was one of those days where I felt a tad bit happier going to work. I lived with a routine and it made me feel uncomfortable when things didn't go the way they were supposed to go. Everyone at work knew that. That's why most of them were cautious of me when news about Benedict falling head over heels over someone he met while he was engaged to get married. I wouldn't blame them. I was well aware of how unapproachable I was during the past few weeks. Who wouldn't? I wasn't going to be a saint and bless a marriage or them expecting me to just congratulate them for a job well done.
Woohoo, hurray for destiny and all that.
I honestly thought I had it good. I thought I had it all. I mean I did, for like a couple of years. But apparently, balance must be restored in the universe. You can't just be happy for that long of a time. You have to share whatever happiness you have. I was okay with sharing happiness. I just wasn't okay that I had to share my happiness with others.
"I heard she ran away. I know the wedding coordinator and she called me just a while ago."
I took a couple of steps back and saw some people talking in the coffee room.
"It was probably the guilt."
The other woman shrugged and continued to sip her coffee. I stared at the wall for a brief moment and slowly made my way to the office.
There was a bride in my office, wearing an all too familiar gown. She was slumped on the floor like she just got locked in and was told she was never to see the prince ever again.
She looked up to meet my gaze. She had rosy cheeks, barely had any makeup on, with puffy eyes. I didn't really know what to do. If I were to be with a man who was just recently with another woman, I wouldn't really go to that woman. That's like putting everyone in a very awkward situation.
But she was here, slowly standing and facing me like I was the final boss. I tried to look calm. It felt like my head was about to explode. I just came out of my vacation. Can't this woman let me breathe for like a couple of months at least?
"You're perfect for him," she started, wiping her nose.
"You're smart, confident and you always know what to say," she continued.
I didn't say anything. I wasn't going to say anything.
"Everyone likes you for him. They expected him to be with you. I just – " she took a shuddering breath. "don't understand why he would like me."
I frowned. She's the one wearing the gown.
"I'm sure his mom liked you, too." She sat down on one of the chairs and stared at her hands.
I scoffed. "That woman doesn't like anybody."
She looked at me, her face telling me that she somehow found a comrade.
Benedict took that time to barge in, catching his breath. It was like a scene from a movie. It almost made me want to cry. Their eyes locked, he reached out a hand towards her and she threw herself in his arms. Everything looked like it was in slow motion. I was there the whole time, seeing just how much both of their faces lit up. He looked at me, his eyes showing how happy he was. I didn't know what to feel, so I stood there, stone-faced. What did they expect me to do? Clap? Hug and congratulate them? Give a heart-warming speech about true love?
"Thank you." Jane looked at me, wiping her tears.
I just stood there, motionless. I wasn't her friend. No sane person would. Yet they made me feel like I was the reason how they both realized that they really were meant for each other. Honestly, it made me feel worse about myself. Like that's what I amount to? A product sample that you claimed you like and would come back only to get something entirely different.
I didn't hear what else they told me. I just stared blankly at the door when they left. The vibration of my phone from my pocket brought me back to reality. A little girl's voice was on the other line.
"I know you're busy with office stuff but if you want to watch a movie, you can come over if you like."
I swallowed what seemed to be a lump on my throat and replied with a quiet okay.
Tory reminded me of myself. When I was her age, I tended to be with the adults more. I wondered about a lot of things and I often gave answers that got me in trouble in school. I grew up with a family that expected me to understand how things were simply because that's just how things were. I had to live with the decisions the adults around me made and I was supposed to just roll with it. I spent my childhood wondering what it would be like if I was the adult. I admire Wilbur for trying his best to raise a kid by himself. I had a lot of people to take care of me and I still somehow felt alone.
Tory and I watched the movie in silence. She was happy to help me make the popcorn. With all the pent up emotions I had, it was a piece of cake to get the ice cream from their fridge. Tory looked at me like I was some superhero.
When Wilbur came in the house, he looked as tired as I was. I wasn't going to vent on a person who just had a long day. He was already exhausted. When we finished the film, we both cleaned up the mess. I tried to start a conversation by asking him about his day.
"How was yours?" he asked back.
I sat down and shrugged. "Oh you know..."
"Diana?" he whispered.
It felt like I was standing on a big rock by the ocean, and the waves were getting higher and higher. I keep waiting for it to just swallow me and get it over with but it just won't. Wilbur opened his arms and the waves of emotions that's been inside me the whole time, came crashing all at once. I held onto him as if my life depended on it.
"They got married today."
He soothed my back. "I know."
He cupped my face and made me look him in the eye. "I'll give it a month."
I broke into a smile, which was all too confusing. I was emotionally drained. The man was able to squeeze whatever was left. I was relieved it was a positive one that came out of it.
"Sorry about this. Tory called me today and I figured it was better than drinking." I took a deep breath and exhaled. "You must've had a tiring day."
"It was okay. And you know what? It was his loss. Guys like him don't deserve you anyway. Don't let guys who think that they're the next best thing since sliced bread make you feel any less worthy than sliced bread."
I regarded him for a second before going to the fridge. Tory told me a trick with the ice cubes. I highly doubt it worked but when she placed her cold hands on my face, I felt reassured... and a bit numb. I thought it was perfect.
"I wasn't going to say anything but you were looking so serious when you got home." Without another word, I placed my hands on his cheeks and started motioning small circles with my palms on his face.
"Tory did this to me a while ago. She said it made frown lines disappear."
He chuckled, holding my hands. Wilbur was the kind of person I would've met on a holiday, had a great time with and kept his memory with me until I got old. He was 'comfort' if 'comfort' turned to a human being. He was warm and open.
"I wasn't going to say anything but how the hell did you get the ice cream from the freezer?"
I laughed.
Wilbur felt like home.
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